Thursday, January 15, 2009

That's Right - I Love Twilight so Suck It!

Yup, you've got it - I'm a Twilight addict. And proud of it, in an embarrassed sort of way.

I've decided it's time to embrace my inner dorkdom and stop skulking around youtube, where I furtively watch the 'Baseball Scene' over and over again, and admit my Twilight addiction.

Never in a million years did I think I would find myself fibbing to my boyfriend about seeing a movie. For the third time. Within two weeks of devouring the books I had become one of 'them' ('them' being a 30+ year old female who is in love Twilight, that is).

I read atheist debate books for fun, for crying out loud! I like Greek tragedies and have read Atlas Shrugged more times than I can remember. I've gotten into deep philosophical discussions at parties, for fuck sake. All the other books on my shelves are gathering dust as I hole myself up in the computer room, reading Midnight Sun with an almost religious zeal.

The only time I read brain porn like this is to figure out why it becomes best sellers. I really never meant to fall in love.

Honestly, I really was expecting the book to blow monkey nuts. I went to Barnes and Noble and bought the first book, fully intending to mock the shit out of it. Instead, I spent the rest of the evening gorging myself on every last glittery Edward morsel. The next day, I forked over a ridiculous amount of cash for the next three (have you ever lugged a 500 page hard cover book back and forth on a train? I needed a chiropractor afterwards). Less than a week later I began reading Twilight... for the second time.

The addiction had taken over.

Naturally, I didn't want to be drowning in sappy-tween-fantasy-romance novels alone so I encouraged Snarkier Than You to give it a go. I'm pretty sure she looked at me like I was an idiot but read the book anyway. The next day she asked for book two, then went out and got the whole series for herself. You see where this is going... (Pssst - if you don't get it, go check out the other author on this blog. Get it now? Good.)

The next thing I know Snarkier and I had abandoned our usual email content for pure unadulterated Twilight. We knew it was ridiculous and we hid our obsession from loved ones, choosing instead to sneak off to the movie theater to watch the movie (which was hideous) not once, but three times.

So, there you have it. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go watch New Moon trailers...



15 comments:

  1. I love Twilight too, but am still trying to hide how obsessive I've become from DH.

    This trailer was fantastic. It makes me so excited for the real thing. Cross your fingers that Chris Wietz does a good job.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Sarah Blue! Just know that you will have plenty of online support should you decide to come out of the Twilight closet, lol.

    I really hope New Moon is good because, well, because Twilight kinda sucked.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Please also check out my trailer for New Moon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YboVJzi0T6A

    ReplyDelete
  4. I too tried to hide from my husband how obsessed I became with all things twilight and he mocks me to a certain degree. However, I too fell in love - it had this deeply tragic, shakepearan feel to it...you can definitely tell that Stephenie loves tragedy.

    ReplyDelete
  5. that fan made trailer was really good!
    i am too a twilight fan and just like you i never saw it coming!it's just grew on me and took over everything!! i love your blog!

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Limon Power - Wait until you get into Fan Fiction, if you haven't already. Prepare to lose a lot of sleep catching up!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. well. i have been referring to myself as a Twitard for couple of months now, and today?!?!
    I FOUND MY PEOPLE! (in the words of my new fave Twitards... SQUEEEEE!)
    i am so pleased to find you guys, your story is much like the one i share with my own friends - we suffer from OCD - obsessive cullen disorder? altho, it's not so much suffering as drooling and sighing uncontrollably. and my poor, poor mother; upon whom i foisted edward and she hasn't looked back yet. she stopped reading "1812" for this! I LOVE IT. all my free time is spent reading filthy fanfic or working on a twilight art project, and my poor kids are SOOOO embarrassed by me (11 and 15 year old boys - I AM MORTIFYING! heh.
    hope to see ya at the New Moon premier,(i'll be the 35 year old in the Forks Athletic Dept tee that sez Hale on the back!)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yup - you have found you peeps, all right! Join us - follow us - come to the TwiSide - ok, ok, sounds like you are already there - lol!

    Definitely check this out - I think you will appreciate it (especially the one about giving your teens something to be embarrassed about - hehe).

    http://twitarded.blogspot.com/2009/06/twitardeds-100-ish-ways-twilight-has.html

    : )

    ReplyDelete
  9. Holy Crow!!! I am finally done reading all your damned nasty, smut filled, hilarious posts! This blog has been my life for three days now. I need to go shower, maybe do some laundry, and feed my family now (I swear my kids must've of thought Stephanie Meyer finally released a 5th book in the series, as they have eaten cereal and frozen dinners since Sat). Thanks so much for the laughs!!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I too, like all the others, am addicted 150% to Twilight. It all started when I bought the first book....not sure what I was getting myself into and thinking that the friends who told me to read the books were insane...NO WAY would I get addicted....man, am I eating my words now. I'm more addicted than they are. Sad, but true! I'm a 31 year old mom to a 9 month old baby....poor child, she's really going to think Edward Cullen is her father...with all the pics I have of him...and I came close to buying the FullSize Edward a couple of days ago when I read one of the blogs and you guys had pics of FSE. I freaked and did the TWITARDED SQUEEEEEEEE and began my search online to buy him..but didn't have the money to do so...I FIGURED my child needed diapers over FSE...but I am not ditching the idea...I WILL get him...soon! Santa will just have to strap him to his back and set him up next to the damn Christmas tree this year! Anyways, what I'm trying to say is, THANK GOD i'm not alone...and because of you guys, NO DOZ has increased it's profits over the past couple of days thanks to the blogs and me not going to bed until 5am. I'M SO TWITARDED!!!! And I have you guys to thank for it!!!! :o)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I too tried to hide from my husband how obsessed I became with all things twilight and he mocks me to a certain degree. However, I too fell in love - it had this deeply tragic, shakepearan feel to it...you can definitely tell that Stephenie loves tragedy.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I too, like all the others, am addicted 150% to Twilight. It all started when I bought the first book....not sure what I was getting myself into and thinking that the friends who told me to read the books were insane...NO WAY would I get addicted....man, am I eating my words now. I'm more addicted than they are. Sad, but true! I'm a 31 year old mom to a 9 month old baby....poor child, she's really going to think Edward Cullen is her father...with all the pics I have of him...and I came close to buying the FullSize Edward a couple of days ago when I read one of the blogs and you guys had pics of FSE. I freaked and did the TWITARDED SQUEEEEEEEE and began my search online to buy him..but didn't have the money to do so...I FIGURED my child needed diapers over FSE...but I am not ditching the idea...I WILL get him...soon! Santa will just have to strap him to his back and set him up next to the damn Christmas tree this year! Anyways, what I'm trying to say is, THANK GOD i'm not alone...and because of you guys, NO DOZ has increased it's profits over the past couple of days thanks to the blogs and me not going to bed until 5am. I'M SO TWITARDED!!!! And I have you guys to thank for it!!!! :o)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yup - you have found you peeps, all right! Join us - follow us - come to the TwiSide - ok, ok, sounds like you are already there - lol!

    Definitely check this out - I think you will appreciate it (especially the one about giving your teens something to be embarrassed about - hehe).

    http://twitarded.blogspot.com/2009/06/twitardeds-100-ish-ways-twilight-has.html

    : )

    ReplyDelete
  14. well. i have been referring to myself as a Twitard for couple of months now, and today?!?!
    I FOUND MY PEOPLE! (in the words of my new fave Twitards... SQUEEEEE!)
    i am so pleased to find you guys, your story is much like the one i share with my own friends - we suffer from OCD - obsessive cullen disorder? altho, it's not so much suffering as drooling and sighing uncontrollably. and my poor, poor mother; upon whom i foisted edward and she hasn't looked back yet. she stopped reading "1812" for this! I LOVE IT. all my free time is spent reading filthy fanfic or working on a twilight art project, and my poor kids are SOOOO embarrassed by me (11 and 15 year old boys - I AM MORTIFYING! heh.
    hope to see ya at the New Moon premier,(i'll be the 35 year old in the Forks Athletic Dept tee that sez Hale on the back!)

    ReplyDelete

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