Monday, March 23, 2009

Edward's Adventures at SXSW (Part One?)

First of all, a word of advice to anyone who wants to go to SXSW. Plan ahead, mother fruckers. Plan faaaaaar ahead.

Now, Edward's done an awful lot in his long life but, let me tell you, he sure was excited to go to Austin, Texas for the SXSW festival. I mean, he is SUCH a big music fan (as we all know)!!! I think maybe Edward was looking for some new genre of music (I guess ALL music gets old after awhile, right?).

Anyhoo, because I'm cheaper than a baby chick (get it? Get it?!) I was going on a flight that left Philly at the ass crack of dawn. Edward didn't care too much but I have to admit, I was kind cranky about it.

If you squint really hard there's a plane in the background. It's REALLY dark at 3 am!!

I was hoping to get some fun shots of Edward looking uncomfortable jammed into a 747 with everyone and their mother but the harried looking flight attendant informed me that you're not allowed to use a cell phone while the plane is in flight (oddly enough, she seemed totally nonplussed about the fact that I was clutching an action figure in my paws). Um, if using a cell phone might somehow muck up the flight and cause us to all meet our demise (except Edward, natch) in a fiery crash to the ground then I think I might need to rethink my whole 'oh-don't-worry-planes-are-totally-safe' attitude. Just sayin'.

But I digress. Like Edward, I was pretty excited about SXSW. There were something like 1900 hundred acts playing down there, and holy-fecking-shit were there a lot of people!! It's a good thing Edward really gorged himself before we went down there or things could have ended up being a real bloody mess, especially if the Volturi decided to 'clean up'.

The first thing we did was pick up our rental car. While we were there, Edward noticed a car that Alice would totally dig and he got all excited and wanted to borrow rent it.

Unfortunately, it wasn't really in our budget so we got a Kia Rio instead. Edward mumbled something really fast, you know how he does that sometimes, and I couldn't quite make it out but I'm pretty sure he said something about 'being totally fucking uncool.' Whatevs.

Since we had taken a ridiculously early flight we had the whole day to party on in Austin! Naturally, we hit the town as soon as I freshened up (Edward always looks fabulous, the bastard). We hit the bar that ML was playing and I was tickled pink to find that they had free Red Stripes. Now, normally I'm not really much of a beer drinker, but in this fiscally unstable economy I figured I should take one for the team and suck it up. The beer, that is.

I would have taken more pictures of Edward at this bar but, for some reason, some twatwaffle went apeshit crazy and started shoving the beer bottles away. Apparently she was jealous that Edward was getting more attention than her.

Now, here's the thing about this little 'incident'. People really should be careful about who they decide to screw around with. I have no idea what made her angry but if I were her, I would have thought twice about screwing around with some chick who was taking pictures of a gawd damn doll in a bar. I think that makes it pretty obvious that I'm lacking certain social filters, ya know?

Anyway, we wandered around for a bit, checking out the local scenery and what not and then Edward made a pit stop at the ATM.

From there on out we pretty much raced around Austin, trying to catch as many bands as possible. Some of the lines were insanely long but Edward is a bit more patient than I am so it didn't bother him too much. I guess that whole immortal-never-sleeping thing makes a guy pretty zen about a line that stretches around the block, ya know?

Dude! Edward even got a little raucous and went crowd surfing!! Rock it old school, Edward!

But the best part of SXSW was by far being lucky enough to see Peelander Z. Those guys are totally off the fazook. Edward kind of scoffed at their theatrics but, after the show, he reluctantly admitted they were pretty kick ass, for humans.

Edward joining in the festivities

Even Edward thought this was kick ass. I mean, the dude is hanging upside down from the freaking scaffolding by his ankles. Playing guitar. I can't even play guitar sitting in a chair.

Afterward, we hit another bar that ML was playing and Edward insisted on getting this photo to send back to Emmett. He loves to razz Emmett about getting clobbered by that grizzly but Edward's secretly glad because he thinks Emmett's a pretty cool vampire dude.

And then, it was time to go. :( Edward was a doll (excuse the pun) and helped me pack my things.

Our flight left super-duper early again and I barely stumbled my way to the airport. Edward, on the other hand, was bright eyed and bushy tailed, as always. I sometimes resent him for that. And then we were on our way home.

SXSW was definitely a great time and I can't wait to go again next year. It was certainly a very overwhelming trip but I'm glad me and Edward got the opportunity to do it!

Edward had one more reason to love SXSW - he was pretty popular with ladies (minus that one crazy chicky) and even some of the guys! More on that later...


  1. Your Eddie is pretty Bad Ass!!! I'm just sayin'


  2. "Edward always looks fabulous, the bastard" HAHAHA
    And I thought I was the only one who said "bright eyed and bushy tailed"! hehe love your blog!

  3. I love that you included little Edward on your adventures :) Makes me want my own, but the fact that my husband would probably commit keeps me from taking that extra step lol

  4. Poor Edward needs some adult fun once in awhile, ya know? lol. It's got to be pretty irritating to be seventeen for all eternity.


    So glad you love the blog!

    I love the 'bright eyed and bushy tailed'!

    @ Kathy
    Thanks Kathy!

    ML has hinted at the possibility of therapy but I think he's so used to being absolutely mortified by my behavior in general that this is just small shakes.

    I'm so glad you liked it! I hope Edward can help me share many, many more adventures!

  5. Lol Crowd surfing.. and boy, that dude was serious with his music.

  6. Between you and me, I think Edward was a bit miffed he wasn't invited to play SXSW and only could go as observer.

    Thanks for all the comments!

  7. Folks, I couldn't even bring myself to whip out mini-Edward and snap a few pics when I went to pick up my dvds at Target and Hot Topic on Saturday... I don't know how JJ even manages to walk around with those big balls of hers, but I am in awe. All hail JJ!

  8. I know exactly how you feel about the whole taking pictures of mini Edward thing. When I was on vacation, I was taking pictures of him everywhere, and people were giving me the strangest looks. I didn't give an eff though, they were just jealous they didn't have their own Edward!

  9. Yay! I'm so glad you like! I have to admit, it's a lot of fun to bring Edward on adventures. I'm thinking skydiving...

  10. Congrats! I'm giving you this bloggy award:

  11. You're too funny!!! I just stumbled across this blog (I can't even remember how I found it) and laughed because I just referred to myself as a Twitard on my blog the other day. I too am a 30'ish broad who accidently got sucked into the craziness that is Twilight. Lovin the term "twatwaffle", I might have to try that out as my new put-down.

  12. @ aunt_B I have to admit, I stole twatwaffle from STY who stole it from Gawker. Gotta love Gawker.

    I'm so stoked that there are so many of us 'older' chicks out there. It makes me feel like less of a freak, lol.

  13. I'm not really 'older' (midtwenties-ish) but being a mom makes me feel ridiculous for behaving like a 14 year old at a boy band concert.

  14. @Kathy - It's fun to be ridiculous sometimes, ya know? And as far as I'm concerned, nothing wrong with behaving like a 14 year old. :)

  15. I wonder if it bothers ML that Edward is touching JJ's panties

  16. @ CS

    LOL! Nah, ML knows that Edward is harmless and a total gentleman.

  17. Clearly we have a similar sense of humor when it comes to Pocket Edward. I love your blog entries as well as the photos. I have had some of my own adventures with Pocket Edward that you may find funny.
    Thanks for the witty blog entries and great photos.

  18. @vitaminR70

    I will def check out your youtube. Thanks!

  19. @vitaminR70 -

    So I did check out your video - finally! - last night and nearly peed my pants! That is some seriously funny stuff. And the fact that you used the "Run Lola Run" music had me in hysterics! Thanks for sharing! Now go film some more stuff and let us know about it!!! (Please.)
    : )

  20. roflmao, you guys make my fucking work day! seriously! I'm so addicted to twitarded!

  21. Hey, are you guys from Philly? I'd love to meet some fellow Twitards.

  22. My theory on cell phones on planes: They don't do shit to the electrical equipment or cause anything to malfunction. The flight attendants just don't want to have 232 people trying to outshout each other at 10,000 feet while they are trying to sell us $5 pieces of aquarium tubing as earphones, or convince us that $7 is ok for a drink.

    I might be wrong, tho ;)

  23. SO.. I somehow stumbled on to your blog a few weeks ago and felt right at you both, you crack me up and make me feel "normal". Anywhoo..tonight I decided to check out your first blog.You know, see how this whole thing got started.....well, its now almost 3am!!! WTF!!!... So now I'm not just cracked out on Twilight. I'm cracked out on Twitarded too.....ok I'm going to bed...ok, 1 more THEN I'm going to bed....I think...


  24. Lol Crowd surfing.. and boy, that dude was serious with his music.


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