Of COURSE she looks annoyed: I have a bottle AND an ice pop and she has a cup of water and bowl of ravioli or something... Yup, Mom & Dad liked me better...
And somehow we BOTH survived "The Playpen of Death" - I think this thing was actually made out of chicken wire and this pic was taken about three seconds before my HUGE big sis flipped the whole thing over... She made me get stitches more times than I can count but I broke her collar-bone riding her around the living room like a pony so we're even, right?
It was the seventies, people - we were workin' it! I think we are holding new furry stuffed animals of some sort...
However, she was older and cooler and at some point didn't want me following her around; I was the doting younger sibling who spent most of her time doing her bidding under threat of "I'll hate you if you don't." While we've enjoyed each other's company as adults, we've never spent an inordinate amount of time together. Random inexplicable exception: week-long Bahamas get-away circa the mid-nineties [note to Sister Snarky: if I was a little cranky it's because I was having a nicotine fit the entire time we were there because I didn't want you to know I smoked]:
Admittedly, I am a lame aunt to her two awesome kids. And I feel pretty bad about it. But then I remember stuff like how she and her friend (who were supposed to be babysitting) would make lunch for me and the other kids and would write stuff on the underside of our paper plates that we weren't allowed to read until we had completely finished out sandwiches and mine would inevitably say "Your sandwich had a fly in it" or have instructions for doing bust-increasing exercises [flail arms around in wild circles while chanting "you must! you must! you must increase your bust!" anyone else remember that? no? moving on...] and I don't feel quite as terrible. Admittedly still kinda guilty, though...
But Twilight has brought my sister and I together in a way that makes me get all teary in a good kinda way... I think I have talked to her more in the past four months than I have in the last four years. She hasn't managed to convert any of her friends (yet - but I'm counting on you to preach to the masses, Sister Snarky), so basically she only has me to share her new-found obsession with - mwahahahaha! And I love her all the more for it...
A few random-yet-priceless Sister Snarky blurbs:
On watching Twilight with her 12-year-old niece:
I finally broke down and bought a dvd of Twilight so I could watch it to my hearts content (of course two days later school ended so that shot that idea, but I digress) and last weekend we had Violet [names changed to protect the legitimately innocent] for the weekend, which was great because she's a HUGE Twilight fan. I was so excited to watch it with someone that I forgot she is only 12 and I think I completely freaked her out. Lesson learned - a 43 year-old mom should not watch a movie with a child where it might happen that they are both lusting for the same pretty boy. After about 10 times where Edward appeared and I went, how do you say it... "squeeeeeeeee!", Violet suddenly was "tired" and sulked up to bed. Poor me watched the rest of the movie alone with no one to "squeeeeee!" with (OK, maybe quietly to myself) or talk about how they put too much lipstick on RPattz's pretty face. SO embarrassing...
Random email during one of the rainiest spring/summer seasons in NJ:
From: Sister SnarkyAnd my personal favorite, Sister Snarky's belated "How Twilight Changed My Life" entry [hey she's family--I made an exception--Twitarded's not a democracy, remember? Oh and I'm going to need some prizes back because this one takes the cake - jk...]:
Sent: Thursday, June 18, 2009 10:26 AM
To: Snarkier Than you
Subject: Am I in Forks?
Rain... Grey.... Cold... Everything green.... Did I die and wake up in Forks? Edward, darling, where are you????:)
Here is what I was thinking as I was reading your "How Twilight changed my life" entries, because while they were good, and I am all for women having a good looking dude to think about when they are shagging the husband, I realized I had a really good one but didn't submit it on time. So here it is:
Twilight changed my life in that it allowed me to see my sister for who she is for the first time in our lives. She gave me a copy of Twilight (loaned, but it's mine now) and harped on me for months to read it.
Unfortunately, I was a die-hard Buffy fan and any vampire who wasn't a bleach-blond named Spike could just, well, bite me. So I let a lot of time pass without Twilight in my life (I can't believe it either, I know). Then, one night I picked it up for the hell of it. I am not sure what happened next, for the next thing I knew three days had passed, I hadn't slept, I was on the last few chapters and I was running to the bookstore like a junkie so I could get New Moon and not have to suffer a moment of Twi-withdrawal. I was hooked. My sister told me that if I finished all four books there was a reward. After finally getting through the love/hate relationship that is Breaking Dawn, I got that reward in the form of Twitarded. You see, my sister is Snarkier Than You (she really is by the way). I was absolutely blown away by the blog. My sister was snarky (like me!) and over-the-top fucking hilarious (like I hoped to be!). And she had friends who are fall-off-your-chair funny and sarcastic too! I never knew!! My sister was always "the pretty one" but I secretly gloated over the fact that I had the better personality - but guess what - that is blown to itty-bitty bits now because she just might be wittier than me. So unfair - smaller nose, bigger boobs and now funnier and more sarcastic than myself [note from STY: Sister Snarky is BEAU-T-FUL! And thinner than I will ever be...]. Without a doubt, if we both met Edward she would get him and I would end up with what you know is the very small-penised Mike.
She sucks but I love her more than ever... and yes, Twilight might be even better than Buffy.
I can't even describe how warm & fuzzy this made me feel! I'll admit it: I was teary. And am so happy that we're closer now - thanks to Twilight! - than we have been in years and years and years. Who knew???
In an awesome but slightly-less-deep it's-a-small-Twi-World moment, I was at her place last weekend (she was gunning for "Saint" status by hosting our parents - yet again! - while they were visiting from out of town) and we were whispering conspiratorially about Twilight and the blog while we were hoping nobody else was paying attention. Nobody else in my family know about our Twilight obsession or Twitarded, and although Mr. Sister Snarky is aware of the blog's existence, he's never been allowed to read it because he's not a fan and rumor has it that SS threatened to go all Lorena Bobbit on his privates should he bring it up in the presence of my parents.
We were giggling like we were tweens again [what IS it about Twilght?!] and half expecting our father to tell us to knock it off or we'd be sent to our rooms without dinner when she said something that stopped me in my tracks...
Sister Snarky: I was on YouTube searching for Twilight stuff and I found this awesome video that shows the Edward doll bobbling along outside a car as it's being driven through Forks... It's HYSTERICAL! You HAVE to watch it!!!
Snarkier Than You: Wait - the one with the music from "Run Lola Run"?!?
SS: YES!!! That's the one!!! I loooove that video!!!
STY: That was made by Vitamin R70, one of our fave bloggy friends!!! She is camping this weekend but I'm going to Tweet her now because she's totally gonna DIE when I tell her this story!
I guess my sister and I are a lot more alike than we ever suspected... And thanks to VitaminR for her part in the sib bonding over the weekend!
And I know I've posted it here before, but Vitamin R's awesome "Pocket Edward Goes to Forks" video has staying power and still cracks me up! And it cracks up Sister Snarky, too. Luv' ya', sis!!