Saturday, October 24, 2009

Finally! A Robert Pattinson Video You Can Enjoy With The Kids!

That's right: someone finally made a video that you won't have to feel embarrassed to watch and listen to with the lil' ones lurking around... Tired of little Ethan singing "Sex On Fire" in front of the other, less-understanding, non-Twi mommies? Think it's time to maybe get your wee one listening to something other than Pussycat Dolls and Britney Spears songs?? Well my friends, today is your lucky day. Hot pics for you, an educational song for the little ones!

In a happy string of sorta coincidences, I was tweeted a link to this by purpleg8r last night. She said she saw it and envisioned Jenny Jerkface and I singing along after a bit of weekend-level imbibing. Not gonna say it could happen, not gonna say it didn't... When I went to YouTube to check it out, I found that I had already subscribed to her videos - unicorns429 - and had posted her "Robert Pattinson I Want Your Hands on Me" video a couple of weeks back. Small Twidom!

No hand-puppets were hurt in the making of this video. Except maybe the couple hundred they skinned, dyed white, and pieced together to make that shaggy fur rug Plaidward is splayed on in a few pics. Other than that, though...




OK, I was looking at unicorns429's other videos, and I HAVE to post this one, too! Er, kick the kids out of the room for this one, because there's definitely "let's get it on" kinda music here and the first minute and a half of the video features pans of Robward's crotch exclusively [note: I can make out his phone and nothing else - should we be worried?!] before moving on to lips...and elsewhere... Yeah, lock that door behind the kids why dontcha, just in case you need a few minutes (and I think you probably will). Oh but you might want to stop this one at 3:30 since the final, lingering shot is...well, you'll see... Now that I watched it to the very end, I feel comfortable saying you will be snapped back to some harsh plane of reality faster than you can say "The Tuck" and you'll be able to go on with your day after you shake that parting shot off... Don't say I didn't warn ya', but I do love the other 210 seconds to bits! : )

31 comments:

  1. Ooo, I hadn't seen the plaidward on a fur rug shots before ... I'm now off to scour the internet so they may also be apart of my personal collection ... (you know, like the one we all have ;)

    And yes ladies, stop it early, I wasn't paying close enough attention and it got past me ... egh

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  2. Is it so wrong to just want one shot of his crotch with some big huge obvious bulge. I mean as much as that shot of Taycob going commando in his sweatpants made my eyes bleed, I'm desperate for a dong shot of RPattz. Call me a whore if you must... but I just need it. I have to stop wondering if he has a teeny peen!

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  3. Kids, do NOT come in here! Mommy is cheating on Daddy with Mr Jawporn Tuckster, and she needs a few minutes (3:41) of privacy. Whew, got through it without being spied upon *heart racing* by the kids or Mr. Any Mouse who was out on an errand. The last shot was okay for me. It helps erase memories of "The Haunted Airman" that I finally got to watch last night. Meh. I love wierd movies and all, but that just had no point, glad it was only an hour+. Rob was too young for me in that one, and he has matured so nicely!

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  4. @Latchkey Wife - Hahahahaha! There is no way he has a teeny peen. Have you seen the size of his feet, and those fingers? You know what they say about those tall skinny guys. It's true...I know from experience, ssshhhh. Just sayin'.

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  5. I agree AnyMouse :) You can always tell by the fingers. Loved the alphabet one :-D

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  6. we should start some twitter topic like #needRpattzBulgeShot or #GimmeRpattzDongStat!
    LOL...LKW - You are a Ho but thats what we loves about ya.

    STY - I totes liked the alphabet song & Rpattz..even the simple classic words he lives up to. and holy crotch hotness..on the next one.

    But Hells No on those PlaidWardFurBall shots. Like- Rob Man? Really? You went there? Hmm...Looks like a pic for a slash twi-fic..just sayijn..srry LKW - can't help myself. >3

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  7. Wow then really wow on the last shot! Based on fingers and feet the Rob monster is probably a belly buster if you catch my drift! Another Rob Ho!

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  8. those hands, that crotch, that rug...
    oh lordy lord lord. the second vid had me drooling. then mr. layla said, "wtf is all that? do u even love me anymore?" and to which i replied, "shhh!"

    he knows i love him. gave him some lovin' after he brought me home some new moon chocolates ;)

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  9. Yay! This is my FB Twi-friend Jade's handy work (heh-heh). She is a total dirty bird and freaking hysterical. She has a knack for focusing on all of Rob's attributes with a magnifying glass hence why we heart her.

    I actually sing that song to my kids. So guess what I will be thinking about now when I sing it? Yep, probably the last untouched-by-Rob part of my life has now been infiltrated. Thank Jade......No really, I mean thanks!

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  10. the 2nd video did me in... droolage... then again im half asleep and prob gonna pass out so it may be due to both needing more sleep and the Rpattz mouthwatering instinct...

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  11. Oh my god. i don't think i've ever had that strong a desire to lick someones face. or hands.. or happy trail.. ok. well i think i've shared enough! thanks ladies! Made my mornin!

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  12. Whoa mama! Ya! Been away for a while due to the crud that going around. "ROBPATTZ healed me!" LOl

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  13. Ok so all thing been equal he is tall and has big feet and hands so everything has to be on proportion but I have seen the exception to this rule too so let's just say that until we have pertinent confirmation we will dream of how we think it should be like ..ok ?
    and the last pict is it real how did they get it ? all I can say 2 things yummy and that girl better be doing him good and hard that is all .... I have "needs" to attend to ....NOW

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  14. I'm dying here!
    I wasn't ready for the second vid. You go all sweet and "child approved seal" on me and then "bang!", Rob's porn!!!
    Gah! I don't know what's wrong with me but those hands are enough to get me away from reality in 0.03 seconds!!! *thomp*

    Happy sunday.

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  15. OMG! This is totally unexpected! I only made it for my friends in Facebook, Vit R, being one of them! LOL! Thanks for sharing it to others! I'm so glad a lot of you liked it! Really happy that a lot of you are enjoying thus!

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  16. @Jade ..you made this vid?? good for you thank you so much ...pls pls let us all know where did you get the last pict ...

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  17. Unicorn429 aka Jade is my F*ck awesome Beta and she ALWAYS gets the best Rob porn on Facebook!

    Yes when Jade isn't fixing my shit she is making beautiful Rob Vids. Jade and Vitamin R are also big on Cocktagging on Facebook! LOL! We Have a blast!!

    Awesome Job Jade!! MAUH~

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  18. *face palm of epic proportions*
    I giggled at the first vid. GIGGLED! Like a school girl!
    What the hellllll is wrong with me! I don't giggle.
    I'm more of a point and laugh kinda girl. This bitch don't giggle!
    Robward broke me!

    Anyways, great vid choices :D

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  19. HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

    *THUD*

    @Jade- I heart you...that vid was AMAZING! (great song choice too)

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  20. I'm glad everyone is loving it and having fun with it! LOL! I couldn't stop laughing myself while I was making this! I couldn't get the song out of my head when my mom asked me to download it for a friend of hers. And I just had to make the video! LOL! thanks everyone for your nice comments!

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  21. Maybe not having kids, and Rob hating kids, is what makes that Alphabet number just all kinds of wrong. Big cockblocker of a song..

    And speaking of big cocks, it's very unfair that we have to look at tons of female celebrity boobage spilling out, but hardly any celebrity cocks to be seen. I don't see men lining up to have penis enlargments - but I bet they would if they were more prominently displayed.

    We need a Red Carpet equivalent of the J Lo groundbreaker dress for men - something that needs junk tape to hold the fabric in place. (Why is Sasha Baron Cohen in the Borat peen hammock/suspender thing coming to mind? Eek...)

    Ok, I need to rethink this.

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  22. Holy Crap....I am coming to the conclusion that my obsession with Rob is starting to reach an unhealthy level!!!!! Yeah Plaidward in the Batman shirt....whew! I'm gonna make a trip to the bathroom now to um....clean up!!!!

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  23. Shit!! someone shoot me please! I just had the most horrible thought in my whole Rob-filled life. Does he even have a dick? I know, I should jump off a cliff. I feel like I just cheated on him (at least that would mean id get to date him first...)

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  24. Sigh...I needed that. I have a chest infection that makes it hurt to breathe and my favorite rabbit died yesterday for no apparent reason. Nothing cheers me up like Robporn.

    It would be a horrible cruel joke of nature for a man that hot to have a teeny peen. He better not be an exception to the big feet rule.

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  25. @ Damarys: that last shot in the robporn vid of Rob's tummy and pubes is from Little Ashes (the famous 'tuck' scene) when he was a wee bit chubbier than he is now (still gorgeous tho).

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  26. mmmmmmm, i must admit that i love "nice 'n slow" way more than any respectable music fan should.

    p.s. my word verification was "grawp." the hp fan in me giggled.

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  27. The pictures of him on the rug make me want to die! I think they have now surpassed the Vanity Fair photos as my new favorites!

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  28. There is always the leather pants (and red velvet jacket)shot...imo the closest we've gotten yet, lol

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  29. Unicorn429 aka Jade is my F*ck awesome Beta and she ALWAYS gets the best Rob porn on Facebook!

    Yes when Jade isn't fixing my shit she is making beautiful Rob Vids. Jade and Vitamin R are also big on Cocktagging on Facebook! LOL! We Have a blast!!

    Awesome Job Jade!! MAUH~

    ReplyDelete
  30. @Latchkey Wife - Hahahahaha! There is no way he has a teeny peen. Have you seen the size of his feet, and those fingers? You know what they say about those tall skinny guys. It's true...I know from experience, ssshhhh. Just sayin'.

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  31. Wow then really wow on the last shot! Based on fingers and feet the Rob monster is probably a belly buster if you catch my drift! Another Rob Ho!

    ReplyDelete

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