Thursday, December 3, 2009

Mini-Edward Gets Neglected! How Did This Happen?!

It occurred to me recently that while I never travel anywhere without Mini-Edward, he has been horribly neglected these last few months. In my defense, he goes with me everywhere! He's endlessly entertaining when I'm left waiting in random doctor's offices and even let me hold his cold little hand for comfort when I landed in the ER a few months back (but all the blood and IVs make him a little edgy...er, me, too, for that matter). But lately, I just forget that he is in his special little Twilight pencil case Awesome-Twi-Action-Figure Tote rolling around in my handbag. I mean, he went to the New Moon premiere (natch!! he was even on my list of important things not to forget along with the tickets and booze!) and he only made one brief cameo in the deserving clutches of "The Hands of Twilight." And we were there - lollygagging around - for hours and hours... In hindsight, I felt kinda bad. Granted, I was pretty hopped up that night - I practically forgot my own name and if pressed I may have called myself Jenny Snarkface or Snarkier Than Jerks or something like that. I get anxious easily - what can I say?


All I can say at this point is...I'm sorry Mini-Edward! When you and your North Side of Town doppelganger [aka JJ's Mini-E] first came into our lives, we took advantage of every possible photo opportunity. Hell - we made photo ops every chance we had! Before we even started blogging (er, or at least when we first started the blog), we were just taking pics and sending them to each other. Then if finally occurred to us that it might be funny to other people and needed to be shared with the three other people who were reading Twitarded in the early months of this year.

Mayhem ensued...

He's been our best drinking buddy...

...and sometimes he over-indulges.

He likes his hair done "just so" - this is post-highlights!

Plus he's a very good instructor.

He's not afraid of needles or tattoos...

...and he always lends a hand at the office.

Knows how to deal with a bear!

and "borrow" a car...

...plus make new friends...


of ALL sorts!

And then... Well, I don't really know what happened... FanFic? New Moon? The life-sucking force that is Real Life? Who knows... What i DO know it that I am repentant and am going to make amends. You will be seeing a lot of Mini-E in the near future. Starting...NOW!

Don't judge. I still love STY even if she's been distracted...

This is a nice segue for me (score! I love it when a plan comes together...), because I want to give a lame-but-heartfelt mea-culpa/apology to all those folks who donated to the Auction/ALSF kitty and are still waiting for their buttons - and to the folks who bought buttons in the last week or two-ish...

Buttons are on the way! Errr...almost all of them! We like to be inclusive here at Twitarded and we'll tell you what's going on even when we've fucked up. Although in this case, I place at least part of the blame for the delay on the good ol' United States Postal Service.

Long story short-ish... Or not - ok fuck it here's the scoop and it's long:

I didn't consider how many buttons I'd be mailing out when I said that everyone who donated ten bucks or more would get one - and I KNEW that we wanted to raise thousands of dollars! Yup - my degree is in English. Not math. And sometimes I am short on common sense... Oops. [But just so you all know, we donated more than $3,100 to The Fandom Gives Back/Alex's Lemonade Stand - thanks!!! - and TFGB has raised more than $87,000 in total - wooo!!! I still get a little teary over this amazing show of support... I am blown away!]

I used up every envelope and piece of stationary I own and then attacked my greeting card stash (those of you who get a random birthday or Mother's Day card, you've been warned). Things got hinky.

I ran out of buttons. Twice. The bag of envelopes you see Mini-E chillin' with above is round three and there are a LOT of envelopes in there! I still have about forty people to get to (I'll have to wait for the next batch of buttons to send them - sorry!!).

The post office - or should I say the two people at the counter this week who are NOT my usual folks - totally screwed me and suddenly wanted to charge me double what I'd been spending to mail buttons (over $1 in the US and more than $2 for international - AND I had to fill out customs declarations for every non-US letter. fml!). So I have been lurking around trying to get in there when my usual peeps are manning the counter...

So, it was a little bit of a debacle and I'm sorry to keep everyone waiting... Thanks for being patient! Fine, I know nobody is patient these days but at least now you know that they're on their way so maybe you can stop cussing me out. Over this, anyway.

42 comments:

  1. My Mini E has been on quite a few adventures lately. Here is the link for the New Moon night, he was quite a ladies man that evening. http://shannonrae72.blogspot.com/2009/11/adventures-of-mini-e-episode-4new-moon.html

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  2. I freakin' loved the way mini-edward was in perfect proportion with the crowd in some of those photos...like he was really there!!! I remember one that you guys posted that was his back and it looked like he was walking in front of you!!! Priceless...

    I DO have a math degree and i can tell you I make postal mistakes almost constantly...I'm actually scared of the post office...I avoid it at all costs.

    I made a shout out to you guys and Latchkey Wife along with Lisa from 17 forever in my blog today, because of the total lack of shit to write about lately...but i see you guys are still making me laugh out loud!

    xoxoxoxoxo

    W/V---knuff---the Russian way to say 'enough'

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  3. You really need to post your Mini- E photo tips! I haven't quite deveopled the knack of getting him in the proper perspective. I'll try to practice this weekend! The shot of him leaning over the loo is priceless

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  4. After all that awesomeness I was left with this:

    STY used the word hinky. It's a favorite of mine, (Thank you Mr. Letterman) and I'm wondering why I don't use it more often... Seems kind of hinky to me.

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  5. Loved seeing the Mini-E pics I haven't seen before! I agree with everyone else, the perspective shots are fab! I entertain myself for hours with my mini's when I do pics for the blog, although Chimpsten drives me insane with her limp limbs and I normally end up using nearly a whole roll of sticky tape persuading her to comply. I was giggling at her most of the day yesterday, I bought her an armchair to sit on and it makes me laugh everytime I look up from her and see her sitting there like the Queen. I really need to find my camera lead...

    Can't wait to see more of your Mini-E :o)

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  6. Loved these photos. And the one where he's wearing a towel made me put my hand over my mouth so that I wouldn't laugh out loud (I'm in my office, after all).

    Stan, yes you definitely need to find your camera.

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  7. I love the adventures of Mini-E and have definately missed him! Some of my laugh-out-loud moments in my office when I'm reading the past blogs have been where he is involved. BRING BACK MINI-E!!

    I so want my own but I don't want to completely out myself to the DH - maybe if I buy a bigger pocketbook I could just hide him constantly like you do???

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  8. I've missed the adventures of Mini-E (aka Pocket Edward)! You guys are the reason I even own one.

    I got to worrying, though, that I would have to rename him Mini-E, thinking I must have dreamed that you guys called him Pocket Edward. But I just went through some old posts and found where you called him Pocket Edward, too, so I feel better now :)

    Happy Friday Twitards!!

    Lisa
    17 Forever

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  9. Pocket Edward went to Cuba too!
    http://twilightmommyblog.blogspot.com Seems he's getting around! Love your Mini Ed Pics.

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  10. I heart Mini E!

    I heart you ladies more though. I wouldn't sweat the Great Button Debacle of '09...

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  11. Don't feel too bad...I found my mini-E under the kids toybox when I was rearranging my living room to make room for the christmas tree!! I said, "There you are"!...I'm thinking of adding him to my christmas decorations so he can hang out with Spiderman and He-Man during the rest of the year!!

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  12. My PE (Pocket Edward as we call him) goes with me everywhere. I have even had friends borrow him for photo ops...however I have yet to form a cherant sentence when non-twi people ask WTF is up with the doll. I went to the Texas State Fair and got PE in a shot...in the background of this picture are two of my friends pointing at PE with the WTF look on their faces...later they asked what that was...I played it off as if I didn't know what they were talking about...

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  13. The continued adventures of MIni E brings a smile to me everytime I see what he gets himself into.
    Love the towel one...

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  14. I have missed Mini-E! Seeing his beautiful hard as marble (plastic) face has inspired me. It's time I get my own! I've just got to figure out a way to introduce him to the family so they don't think I've completely lost it, and call the guys in the white coats.

    No worries about the buttons either. I figured you guys were completely swamped with something called RL (what's that?!), and just couldn't get to it. So sorry you're having issues with the P.O. I hope Mini-E isn't going to go postal on you! I'm going to Mr. Any Mouse' office X-mas party tonight, and am debating leaving my Twitarded pin on my coat, which I wore to see NM. Should I, and risk exposing myself to the world of regular people? Or should I take it off? I'm pissed off at Mr. AM right now, so I'm leaning toward leaving it on, heh.

    Word veri: ponglet - Beer pong with a shot glass.

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  15. Love the mini E pictures... He provides us with hours of entertainment!

    Hey if it's too pricey or a hassle to send buttons you don't have to send me one. I know the hastles of dealing with the post office. Crap they almost want your first born to mail something lately.

    Conformation word: renessu
    almost as bad as renesmee

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  16. I want a mini E but I think my hubtard would freak out if I got one, sigh, is it not enough I have to hide my stash of Rob stuff at work where the hobbit comes in and sneers at it. I dread to think what he would do with a mini E if he found it in my office, it may end up in his dark hobbit hole and I don't think even Masen could put up with that!!!
    Apart from that I have nothing to say, nothing has happened to me today out of the ordinary, no strange Edwards have entered my life to massage me. I did have a swine flu vacc and normal flu injection and i thought maybe I could call Physio Ed to rub my arm but then I thought nahhh I'll scare him. I did go to the post office today only to hear the postman say to his mate look out here comes trouble.... I hadn't even said or done anything, no one else was in there. My reputation precedes me it would seem ladies bwahahahahaaa

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  17. Everyone WILL get their buttons - eventually... This is the kind of crap that keeps me up at night - lol! Z any mouse & Red Bella - definitely saw yours in the mix! I don't know what it is with the post office folks - they tell me different things on different days - ugh! Hopefully the ones that went in the mail yesterday will make it - I stamped them the way I've been doing it all along (which STILL costs 64 cents a button - crikey!) so fingers crossed! sorry to whine about it but shit it's been frustrating! : )

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  18. I'm so glad to see mini-E get some play time.

    A couple months back, I let my 3-yo watch the prom gazebo scene of Twilight (insert bad mother comment here) I was in bed sick comfoting myself with Twilight when hubby let her in our room at the right time. We had just gotten back from Disney where she was enchanted with all things princesses and loved meeting Prince Charming. So my daughter watched intently as they danced and said, "Oh, he's a prince."

    Hubby rolled his eyes, "great, just lost another of my girls to this guy."

    So ever since then I point Rob out on mags and ask her "who is that?" and she always responds, "the prince." Now she needs no prompting, "Look Mommy, it's the prince!"

    We are in Target 2 weeks ago and I stopped in front of a little Twilight display picking up mini-E and handing him over to my tot before I even had a chance to look at it. In her sweet voice she crooned over him and then said, "Oh Mommy its the prince! He's very sparkly and he has beautiful soft hair." (how could she tell there is plastic between her fingers and his hair??)

    I was brought to laughing tears. I looked over mini-E for the first time and saw that he did have glitter on him and he was sparkly from it.

    Something tells me Santa will you bring my daughter a mini-E for Christmas. ;) Junie

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  19. Mini-E spent the New Moon premiere tucked in my cleavage, as planned. And I noticed I was not the only one to embarrass myself that way, according to the photo evidence on the web.

    Interestingly, it appears that until a few weeks ago Rob was not aware of Mini-E's existence. When those crazy fan girls outside at the Today showed him the Mini-E that they said was eaten by a squirrel, he didn't realize that was supposed to be him.

    Then, when Ellen (I think it was Ellen - that week is a blur and my DVR is still recovering) showed him the Edward Barbie, he mentioned he had seen that one, but not the one the Today show crazies showed him.

    Which made me very, very sad. Because it means he hasn't been following the numerous blogs that post all of Mini-E's/Pocket Edward's adventures. Which means he's probably not reading blogs. Which means even if I start a blog, he will never visit. Boo, freakin, hoo.

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  20. Random verification word I just noticed: "morone"

    I feel like a morone that I carry a doll around in my purse and show it to people.

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  21. Mini-E has had many adventures in San Fran as well. I wanted to teach him the finer points of bowling while I let my inner W-T loose. Turns out he is a natural! Seriously, is there anything he's NOT good at? He has also challenged both my Mini-Cylon Centurion and Mini-Dread pirate Roberts to cage matches. My lame photo skills couldn't quite capture the awesomeness of it all but, needless to say, Edward schooled 'em.

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  22. Mini Edward is in my uterus...and biting the shit out of me. LOLOL!! What's gotten into me? I know...the sparkle peen...LOLOL!!!

    W/V---renscest---the act of Charlie having sex with Renesmee.

    You just can't make this shit up!!!

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  23. I so need a Mini E in my life!
    Great pictures, for a second there I thought he was at a riot (the one after the snowman) but maybe he's just jam to a good tune!
    I really don't like going to the post office, I really try to avoid it all cost! It's always so eerily quite :/
    Happy Friday to all!

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  24. Poor mini-Edward. We are so ashamed.

    On the other hand, you ladies are going crazy with him! Love looking at all his adventures!!

    Is it just me or are the word verification very... interesting today? More than usual?

    @Track 10 - That picture was taken last year at SXSW in Texas. The band was Peelander Z. They are fucking insane. Mini-E had a blast.

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  25. Was Mini E stage diving? Love the pics!! My Mini E has been quiet lately, I'll have to change that.

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  26. Saw you quoted in the Wash Post article (of love that knows no shame) and thought - I really need to make it over to this site to confess / join my sisters in shame! Looking forward to seeing more of miniE

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  27. I think one the first posts I saw involved mini-e's drinking binge (I was but a lurker then). It fucking killed me I laughed so hard. I knew I'd found home when I saw that post. Looking forward to more mini-e posts. And more full-sized Edward posts too?

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  28. ha! This is funny because a friend of mine on fb recently asked "where has Tiny E been?" (my mini-Edward)
    Natch I said "he has a christmas tree stuck up his ass right now, he's a little preoccupied."
    Have you seen my Twilight tree btw with Angel Edward at the top?
    Hope this link works:
    http://photos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs023.snc3/11044_227775823992_584683992_4105201_1425138_n.jpg

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  29. @Cat - nice! I want that tree if I am going to have a tree at all but somehow I think Mr. Snarly might object - lol!

    : )

    Glad you guys are all for the Mini-E come-back! I missed him too! He's been everywhere but what the hell we can still have a ton of fun with the lil' dude, right? Dirty man-ho that he is - lol!

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  30. Love your PE! The porcelain throne was the best!! Ok, now explain to me why you have a stuffed bear...he was stuffed, right? If I was PE I would be movin' my tiny little plastic legs, just sayin'...


    word verification (if anyone cares): salablam

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  31. my poor mini-E has been neglected too. he is always in my bag, in his special pocket (hehehe... pocket.) but i rarely remember to take him out anymore. it seems lately the only time i do take him out now is when i am asked to by friends who need proof that he exists and that i am nutz.

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  32. STY and JJ I hope you didn't send me a button--I meant to tell you not to because I have many. I hope I didn't add to your stress....ugggh.

    My Mini E had such an action packed summer that he too has been taking it is easy but he is slowly starting to come out and play more and more. I did make the decision not to purchase Mini-Guidoward. It felt like cheating or something--plus he is not nearly as hot in my opinion. Love, love, love that little guy.

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  33. I don't know what I'm going to do with mine.....

    I've taken him to bar patios where he developed a taste for tequila. Then, he got into the pints and it was down hill from there.

    He's even gotten into a couple of fights...I came home to find that he and my Jon Bon Jovi figure had gotten into it - Jon was on the ground and ME was hold his microphone. Sigh.....

    I took him to an outdoor country music festival this summer and he tried to upstage all the talent, particularly, Emmerson Drive.

    When he goes out with me and my girls, he's in everyone's cleavage, in their drinks and arguing with guys over the hockey game.

    I took him to Vancouver with me for the New Moon premiere and then to Glowbal - everything was a photo op for him. He's in more pictures than I am!

    But, he is charming and lovable in a ManVampHo kind of way!

    He's even charmed my coworkers (he resides on my desk at work). In fact, my gay coworker keeps trying to take his clothes off!

    As much as he tries my patience, I think I would miss him terribly if he were gone!

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  34. I would never cuss you out STY! just send me my button twi=whore! Luv u!

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  35. @Anon 12:45 pm - Great story about "Prince" Edward. Loved it!!

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  36. I have decided because of your website I am going to go out today and get myself my own mini-Edward! I will not feel like a loser! I will carry my mini-E wherever I go with pride! Thank you Twitarded for giving me the courage to speak out and say...Yes I am prevert and yes I would like to do very nasty nasty things to Edward/Rob!

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  37. I FUZZY HEART Mini-E!!!

    I talk about all the pics I see on here of Mini-E's adventures so much that my daughter just asked me, "Mommy, do you want a Mini Edward for Christmas?"

    I paused. Then said, "YES! Yes, I do," with a BIG smile.

    @Junie - LOVE the story of your daughter! I told my hubby what your hubs said and he just laughed because he's lost two girls too. :) Actually, he's my real-life Edward. He told me out of nowhere one day, "I'd become a vampire with you." I about DIED with pride and love for my super rad hubby! (I think I'm channeling my inner Valley girl tonight.)

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  38. LMFAO!!! OMG that pic of "Mini-E" over-indulging over the toilet had me PMSL!!! He's such a cutie. & those pics & captions kill me. x

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  39. I have decided because of your website I am going to go out today and get myself my own mini-Edward! I will not feel like a loser! I will carry my mini-E wherever I go with pride! Thank you Twitarded for giving me the courage to speak out and say...Yes I am prevert and yes I would like to do very nasty nasty things to Edward/Rob!

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  40. I'm so glad to see mini-E get some play time.

    A couple months back, I let my 3-yo watch the prom gazebo scene of Twilight (insert bad mother comment here) I was in bed sick comfoting myself with Twilight when hubby let her in our room at the right time. We had just gotten back from Disney where she was enchanted with all things princesses and loved meeting Prince Charming. So my daughter watched intently as they danced and said, "Oh, he's a prince."

    Hubby rolled his eyes, "great, just lost another of my girls to this guy."

    So ever since then I point Rob out on mags and ask her "who is that?" and she always responds, "the prince." Now she needs no prompting, "Look Mommy, it's the prince!"

    We are in Target 2 weeks ago and I stopped in front of a little Twilight display picking up mini-E and handing him over to my tot before I even had a chance to look at it. In her sweet voice she crooned over him and then said, "Oh Mommy its the prince! He's very sparkly and he has beautiful soft hair." (how could she tell there is plastic between her fingers and his hair??)

    I was brought to laughing tears. I looked over mini-E for the first time and saw that he did have glitter on him and he was sparkly from it.

    Something tells me Santa will you bring my daughter a mini-E for Christmas. ;) Junie

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  41. Everyone WILL get their buttons - eventually... This is the kind of crap that keeps me up at night - lol! Z any mouse & Red Bella - definitely saw yours in the mix! I don't know what it is with the post office folks - they tell me different things on different days - ugh! Hopefully the ones that went in the mail yesterday will make it - I stamped them the way I've been doing it all along (which STILL costs 64 cents a button - crikey!) so fingers crossed! sorry to whine about it but shit it's been frustrating! : )

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  42. My PE (Pocket Edward as we call him) goes with me everywhere. I have even had friends borrow him for photo ops...however I have yet to form a cherant sentence when non-twi people ask WTF is up with the doll. I went to the Texas State Fair and got PE in a shot...in the background of this picture are two of my friends pointing at PE with the WTF look on their faces...later they asked what that was...I played it off as if I didn't know what they were talking about...

    ReplyDelete

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