Sunday, February 28, 2010

Twilight Blogging = Total Facebook Cock-Block

This is seemingly non-Twilight related but I can actually MAKE it Twilight-related because after a year of practice, I can make just about ANYTHING Twilight-related. Really. Try me.

Anyway, I saw this video the other day and thought it was hilarious and wanted to share! I sent the link to Sister Snarky and she confessed that she had come this close to alerting our mom, Momma Snarky, to the existence of this blog (Jenny Jerkface may be OK with her family reading about her Twilight obsession and RPatts stalker-y tendencies and masturbation techniques, but I am not down with that AT ALL). Why was I almost outed? Because Momma Snarky just discovered Facebook. So almost a nanosecond too late, Sister Snarky realized that she had better unfriend Twitarded and FAST because Momma Snarky is a nosy sort and it would take her all of three seconds to look at my sister's friend list and say "Twitarded? What's Twitarded? *click*" and it would be aaaaaall over. Gah! Makes me a little nauseous just thinking about it. Or that might just be all the vodka I drank last night. One of those.

This is just the final, final, FINAL nail in the coffin of any remote possibility of my ever having a personal Facebook account (which I don't). Sure I have come close to setting one up because like everyone else, I want to be able to easily cyber-stalk all of my exes, but I won't do it. And a few weeks ago the company where I work sent out an email saying that they had set up a corporate Facebook page and that we should all hurry up and join (really people? isn't LinkedIn enough for you? C'MON!!!). Uh, yeah... NO. It is beyond perplexing to me that there are people out there who want to spend non-work time with co-workers (excluding Office Snarky, natch).

Anyway, enjoy!

33 comments:

  1. All of you assholes need to stop poking me! I love it. I am on facebook to keep up with friends more easily than email, yeah I am lazy, and to stalk folks. It's like the drive by you did in highschool, but way easier! LOL

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  2. All of you assholes need to stop poking me! I love it. I am on facebook to keep up with friends more easily than email, yeah I am lazy, and to stalk folks. It's like the drive by you did in highschool, but way easier! LOL

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  3. I sent my sister the Going to FFOORRKKSS post and she recently told me that she doesn't get it and doesn't see how I fit in with it all. I just scoffed and realized that she was just missing out on the fun and I couldn't possibly convince her of how awesome it all is.

    I thought companies usually frowned upon their workers being on Facebook, etc. Can you actually access Facebook while at your office? I can't do anything like that (although I push my luck with checking the blogs). Loved that video.

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  4. @STY serious question...would your mom go all apeshit if she stumbled over here, or do you think she might be kinda impressed, or even proud?? i don't know yo momma, but i would be proud of your ass!!
    after the initial shock wore off that is...
    no offense meant, just genuinely curious about the worst case scenario.
    :)
    E

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  5. God I hate that I have a facebook account. I really do need to get rid of it.

    Awesome video and it pretty much sums up how I feel about it.

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  6. I actually really lurv facebook. But it's my RL identity, which includes friends (current and, uh, high school-era) as well as work peeps and family (gah!). This means I have to be pretty careful what I say/do there. (I'm pretty much in the Twi closet on fb.)

    @ Totally Inappropriate I also appreciate stalking folks, but the proliferation of apps that tell people who visits their pages (and how often!) has sorta killed my buzz. ;)

    @STY Perhaps your mom is doing you a huge favor. Who needs another time-suck social networking account, right?!

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  7. My Dad's on FB but when I update I make sure it's to people other than him. He and some of my other family members are in an "exclude" list for pretty much all of my posts. That way they have to idea how Twilight and Rob has pretty much taken over my life. =P (Which is the only reason I'm on FB at all).

    That vid is all kinds of win too. Thanks for sharing. =)

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  8. I totally had to unfriend like 10 people on facebook this week because my cousin tagged me in a note telling her Twi friends to check out my blog. Well, an error kept occuring when I tried to remove the tag so I just had to unfriend the people who would be all judgemental and try to put me through deliverance if they found out what I like to do in my spare time. So in a couple of weeks I will just request them back claiming technical malfunction and no one will be the wiser.

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  9. @ living with Edward I love the idea! LOL always blame the computer, or "something new" to do with FB.

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  10. STY, this is EXACTLY why I hate FB.

    I had a creepy thing happen to me just a couple of weeks ago. My EX brother in law wants to be fucking friends. Hello? Divorced over 12 years ago and now he wants to be friends? Don't think so, asshole. Didn't like your brother enough to stay married to him, why in the hell would I want to be "friends" with you!??

    And the other people who have come out of the wood work wanting to be "friends"...my thought is that if I wanted to be friends, I would have stayed in touch to begin with.

    My traitor brother actually showed my mom my FB account, and she had some comments. I thought, Not fucking worth it. Really. Not. Worth. It.

    LOVED the video. Sums it up for me....

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  11. ACK! Facebook can be hazardous to your Twiharded life, indeed. And try saying what you really want to say when the pastor of your CHURCH is your FB FRIEND!!!

    That video was so funny - wouldn't we all love to just STAND UP and say the things WE WANT to say like that guy did! "...still not sure what that fucking means but I HATE IT! Are we CLEAR??!" ROFLMAO!

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  12. Cindy...you can select what people can see on your Facebook. I have several of my friends' kids on my list and there are certain things I'd rather they didn't see. And I have a few things that only I can see (my Twilight gifts for example).

    I also have pictures on there that are restricted to some groups like my Twilight/mini-Edward ones. Only my Twitarded friends have access to those.

    I did a massive clean-up of my FB page a month ago and got rid of a lot of apps - especially ones that I hadn't touched in months. Only the bare bones.
    But I totally agree about the apps invites, the invites to certain events and the invites to games.

    I swear to everloving fucking Gawd! If I see one more invite to Farmville, I will kill someone.

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  13. Is your sis friends with any other Twitarded... enthusiasts?

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  14. I would have peed my pants! I'm glad my mom doesn't know what a Facebook is yet...eeek.

    I agree Farmville requests are the most annoying, second with Which *insert nerdy Sci-fi word* Character Are You?, AND that friend who thinks FB is Twitter so you miss every other post from legit sources over the past two days/weeks.

    ***FB has an option to not include?!! What! Here I was manually deleting shit all the time.

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  15. @STY - LMFAO. luvs you dothis guy -fucking farmville WTF!?

    yeah, u don't need no stinkin FB when u got this fantasmic blog!

    i luv FB - and my twi-identity is pretty much safe w/my UN. i just keep it clean on FB. heh - i wouldn't want to BREAK that too.

    you know, it's not that hard to be who you want to be - or not be - the way techno is today.

    i say enjoy who u r. and if some tightass outs you - fuck em, feed em fish heads!

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  16. I used to use FB everyday. Then I got twitter. I hadnt looked at it for three months until today when I saw this and decided to check it out.

    That video is hilarious, my boss caught me watching it and instead of screaming at me like always, he laughed his face off and walked away.

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  17. I have one friend who posts every second of her life and trust me, it ain't that exciting!

    B is going to work
    B is home from work
    B is making dinner
    B is watching Lost
    B is ready for bed
    B is going to bed...'night!

    Yikes......

    I like to be a bit careful of what I put on my FB. As I said, I have kids on there but also coworkers, music industry friends, actor friends and family.

    I have a separate account for all things Twilight but to be honest, I hardly ever go over there.

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  18. I have been a FB-er for about 2 and a bit years now, but saying that I go on there like once a month ! Hence why I am not yet a Twitarded follower on there - yes, I know I am totally missing out on Forks planning! :-( I need to get that sorted, I think though that I am going to have to do a special profile for my Twilight world, as friends and family just would NOT get it, and they are all so nosey!

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  19. I used to think Twitter was the devil...and now, not only am I positive of my previous assumptions, I'm actually consorting with the Dark Lord. Huh.
    **shrugs**
    E

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  20. I posted this up on the Sunday comments, but I'll put it up here again...

    Just have to share my 'Twilight-esqe' Sunday with you.... I got to meet/see Aro (aka. Michael Sheen) himself today!!!
    No RPattz I know, but I am a huge fan of his films, and so it definitely made my day- total SQUEEEE moment.

    The Jameson Dublin Film Festival wrapped up yesterday, and it was the Irish premiere of Alice in Wonderland 3D (BRILLIANT film by the way), and they announced special guests at the end for a Q+A, and although for about 2 seconds I was sure it would be Tim Burton and Johnny Depp (what? they had both been in th UK promoting film?! I know a girl can dream, huh?!!)
    But as it turned out, it was Michael Sheen and Tim Spall ('Peter Pettigrew' For all you Harry Potter fans) which was so great itself - I was well in the Twilight closet though as I was there with a friend and work colleagues in theatre also, so had to be on 'good behaviour'... LOL

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  21. Holy shit on a stick! You're giving me shit about telling Mr. Latchkey about my blog and you're a big chicken shit about your family finding out? Ok, me too. I don't want ANY of my family to know about my blog! LOL! I think my poor mom would have a stroke after reading some of the filth I write!

    I like Facebook but I fucking hate all the Farmville and Mafia Wars and Fishtanks and all that stupid ass shit that clutters my news feeds. But I just found I can hide that shit so now I'm happy!

    Monday sucks. Just sayin.

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  22. @smartEpantz - I just don't think my mom would get it - and Sis Snarky agrees. Honestly she would probably think it was stupid and would want to know why I was wasting time on something like this. And she'd read it anyway. There's maybe a 5% chance that she could appreciate the fact that I have done/created something special here and I don't really feel like playing those odds if I can help it.

    @DeadGodBirk - good question! i don't think so... Sis Snarky does probably know a few other people who have read Twilight (whether they're admitting it or not) but I don't think she's ready to affiliate herself with the likes of me... She's not even sure the mommies in her circle could get over the "'tarded" name of the blog - call the PC police!

    : )

    @dangrdafne - yup - we can access FB at work (didn't used to be able to but once the company joined...). Twitter too! That's the up-side of the company linking up - lol. I think they wanted to start a blog too (make it stoooop!) - not sure if that will happen or not but i'm keeping my fingers crossed that blogger never gets blocked in my office!

    And I might not think personal FB is a good idea (despite the fact that I am on here spilling the sometimes-sordid-and-occasionally-boring details of my personal life on a daily basis, I consider myself to be a pretty private person in RL) but I do love me some Twitter! I used to not get it at all but now I'm all over it. If I ever caved and got FB I would have it so locked down that nobody would be able to see anything I put up there - lol!

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  23. @STY - oh my personal Facebook is very personal. I had a friend tell me once that when he saw my name he tried to click on it and it did nothing at all and then when he went somewhere else my name was actually blacked out. I know Facebook did some changes but I think I am still pretty hidden - at least I hope so :)

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  24. That was hilarious (except for the fact that I am totally probably guilty!)

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  25. I'm starting to hate Facebook. I used to be there constantly, but now, I just go to play some silly Sorority game, but once I've had enough of that, I am going to delete like 80% of people and just leave the ones I really care about.

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  26. Aww, see I don't think FB is the devil incarnate! However I have blocked almost every application invite that comes my way. Mafia Wars? *block* Farmville *double block*, any app that makes me invite 25 friends and pay attention? *block*

    I guess I'm enough of a tool that my RL fam/friends don't care what I'm up to, and I'm too much of a stalker to other old friends to let it go. I think moving clear across the country gave me the incentive to keep in touch w/ peeps. I did come out of the twi-closet last month on FB, much to the chagrin of many close yet unknowing friends.

    As for my Mommypants...she and I are special. She's onto me. I sent her the Vamp video immediately and she asked if mine had come in the mail yet *the woman knows me...*. Good luck with evading Momma Snarky...It's just going to get more difficult, what with the double carpal tunnel from the Twilight/blog-a-thon.

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  27. I agree 100% with the person who posted right above me and couldn't have said it better myself.

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  28. OK, I did think of something else :)

    @STY, I'm with you and totally leery about using Facebook. Real life and Twilife should never be allowed to collide. I innocently set up an account awhile back for the sole purpose of accessing info on the FOOORRRRRKKKSSS trip. I barely hit enter and suddenly had friend requests from everybody and their mother who had my email address in their address books. My teenage daughter was sitting across the room on her laptop and she quickly looked up and said, "Mom, really...?" Yep, I deleted that sucker in a heartbeat. And there's no freakin' way I'm ever telling those people my twitter name.

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  29. FB is the most fun when you use your out-of-state friend's acct to email guys you used to know and rope them into a game of "Guess who this really is" with a short list of clues.

    Otherwise what scares me is how it tracks every little thing, a lil too big brother.

    SNY-was a girl out on the PLAZA of Today with red hair just like you. Got something to share?

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  30. Holy shit on a stick! You're giving me shit about telling Mr. Latchkey about my blog and you're a big chicken shit about your family finding out? Ok, me too. I don't want ANY of my family to know about my blog! LOL! I think my poor mom would have a stroke after reading some of the filth I write!

    I like Facebook but I fucking hate all the Farmville and Mafia Wars and Fishtanks and all that stupid ass shit that clutters my news feeds. But I just found I can hide that shit so now I'm happy!

    Monday sucks. Just sayin.

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  31. @smartEpantz - I just don't think my mom would get it - and Sis Snarky agrees. Honestly she would probably think it was stupid and would want to know why I was wasting time on something like this. And she'd read it anyway. There's maybe a 5% chance that she could appreciate the fact that I have done/created something special here and I don't really feel like playing those odds if I can help it.

    @DeadGodBirk - good question! i don't think so... Sis Snarky does probably know a few other people who have read Twilight (whether they're admitting it or not) but I don't think she's ready to affiliate herself with the likes of me... She's not even sure the mommies in her circle could get over the "'tarded" name of the blog - call the PC police!

    : )

    @dangrdafne - yup - we can access FB at work (didn't used to be able to but once the company joined...). Twitter too! That's the up-side of the company linking up - lol. I think they wanted to start a blog too (make it stoooop!) - not sure if that will happen or not but i'm keeping my fingers crossed that blogger never gets blocked in my office!

    And I might not think personal FB is a good idea (despite the fact that I am on here spilling the sometimes-sordid-and-occasionally-boring details of my personal life on a daily basis, I consider myself to be a pretty private person in RL) but I do love me some Twitter! I used to not get it at all but now I'm all over it. If I ever caved and got FB I would have it so locked down that nobody would be able to see anything I put up there - lol!

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  32. I totally had to unfriend like 10 people on facebook this week because my cousin tagged me in a note telling her Twi friends to check out my blog. Well, an error kept occuring when I tried to remove the tag so I just had to unfriend the people who would be all judgemental and try to put me through deliverance if they found out what I like to do in my spare time. So in a couple of weeks I will just request them back claiming technical malfunction and no one will be the wiser.

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