Friday, August 13, 2010

Robert Pattinson in Montreal... He's Almost Breathing My Air!

There's nothing better than starting your day off (especially a Friday) with some hot-off-the-presses pics of RPattz. And no sooner do I sit down at my desk this morning to start my Friday, when I'm greeted with a photo from Texas Katherine that killed me. Dead. *Thud*

A collective "NO!" was heard 'round the Twidom in response!!

The first thought that went through my head (and Jenny Jerkface's because apparently we're sharing the same brain today) is OMFG I MUST HAVE THAT SHIRT!!! And then I Google it on the internet because that's what I do when I see something I MUST HAVE (see, I Google RPattz like a million times a day and I must have him) - and my search tells me that this completely fuckawesome piece of clothing was part of the Beastie's 1987 License to Ill tour. Um, excuse me? Rob? You were like a fucking infant when the Boys were on that tour. Where da fuck did you get that shirt?


Like, OMG, where are my acid wash jeans? Totally awe-soooome!

So Snarkier Than You just throws it out there that maybe he bought the shirt at Kitson which apparently has really cool, overpriced clothing that us normal folk can't afford. And THEN she says something to the effect of holy-fucking-shit-they-even-have-a-picture-of-him-on-their-website-with-a-shopping-bag!!

Whacha get there Rob? A gift for me? Awww you shouldn't have!

Seconds later I get yet another email from STY with a link to this photo from Kitson.com and she's all mumbling about buying them in bulk and having found her Forks nightie...

Look familiar?

How about now?

At some point, it's all a blur now, I had to respond with some more photos of the front of him... not that I don't enjoy looking at his ass... not that I wouldn't give my left tit to have both of my hands firmly planted on said ass, preferably while he's thrusting into my va-jay-jay... but fuck, I needs to see that face whenever humanly possible. VitaminR thinks he's an alien. No human can be this good looking. Oh and Rob? She said she'll take down the "Closed" sign and gladly reopen her uterus if you want to make some cute alien babies with her!!

Smoking is so bad... but it never looked so gooooood!

Someone forgot to pack his belt...thank you Jesus!

Once I was able to form a coherent thought again, and had mopped up the puddle of drool on my desk, I realized something. HOLY FUCK ROBERT PATTINSON IS IN MONTREAL... A FIVE FUCKING HOUR DRIVE FROM ME. This may officially be the closest he's ever been to me (that I know of anyway) and my brain immediately starts thinking "road trip!" And then I remember that I'm 40, married and not completely stalkerific crazy like I was in my younger days, so I'm just going to stay home and fantasize about him.

But RPattz, if you're reading this, I have one question for you...

Voulez vous au coucher avec moi ce soir? Je vous attends...nu.

41 comments:

  1. love love love all of this, and the pics of him canoodling? have you seen those? so cute!

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  2. @Kelly B....were there any others? I didn't see...lol!

    That tshirt looks like the most comfortable thing in the world. It would also look good crumpled up on my floor.
    :-)

    FOOOORKS!

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  3. This shirt is the most rock solid proof yet that this is the perfect guy. Yes, the pretty is unrelenting, but face it, it's the attitude that makes us truly ache down there.
    ...And of course, the cruel tease that is the happy trail hiding just beyond that narrow shirt-to-briefs gap.
    Poof!

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  4. The minute that call comes in the closed sign comes down....still waiting......**tapping tabletop with fingers**

    That shirt absolutely kills me. I love that it is kind of too small for him too. It makes me feel old though that a Beastie Boys shirt is retro cool...does that make me retro cool too? Yes, well, I will just think of it that way. It also makes me wish I had taken better care of all my concert/band shirts....I could be sending him care packages.

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  5. Alright is there a Kitson in Seattle? I mean, I too would prefer it to ACTUALLY be his but, yeah, I want one.

    And I can't believe you're actually closer to him than I am. It'd be nearly an eight hour drive!!!!!!!

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  6. He so bought something for Kristen from KITSON. When ES & I were in W. Hollywood, we went into the one on Robertson Blvd..it is sooo cute! Bought her a really pretty necklace from there for her birthday ;)

    Oh Rob...how I'd love to be ON your dick. Just sayin'.

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  7. He is like sex on a stick. I'm reading Water for Elephants just so I can picture his beautiful face as someone other than Edward...although that's not a bad image, either. Smokin'. Hot.

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  8. Are those lavender undies?

    Cheryl

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  9. OH.MY.FUCK.

    Get off your dick?!? Sorry Rpattz but I think not! If any of us were to ever get on it there is no way in hell we would ever get off...EVER!

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  10. @Mrs P - even if it's off of my own back, it would amuse me to no end to see THAT particular shirt wadded up on my floor first thing in the morning. if i'm lucky i'd be the tail-end of a REALLY good dream - lol!

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  11. LKW, I totally understand that feeling of almost-sorta-not-really knowing where Rob is, but he's close enough that you feel that crazy pull telling you to fuck real life and hop in the car to hunt him down anyway. I always manage to resist, but then he wasn't wearing a shirt with the word "dick" on the back last time he was near me :)

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  12. @Kelly B - yup - we've seen them and had a collective toddler-worthy temper tantrum over the fact that two people can be so young, rich, beautiful and ga-ga in love and neither of them is us - lol!

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  13. @Lenzi - you know what? i think they ARE lavender undies! either that or they are gray and he accidentally washed Kristen's red undies in the same load and shit happened...

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  14. @sty -Nah, those babies are gray.

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  15. Okay, I thought the Dick shirt was cute until you pointed out that it was a Beastie Boys t-shirt. Now it's just fuck-tastic and that RPatz is the second coming! Beastie Boys are THE SHIT!!!

    Come on now... 40 and married with kids is NOT a reason to not stalk him! I find myself 41 (and married with kids) this year and last week I drove 5 hours to go stalk a band in concert. Come ON now. Get your GAME FACE ON!!!

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  17. Okay let me try that again... thank you damn acryllic nails.

    I know its no Beastie Boys tour shirt but I have a Hanson concert tshirt circa 1998 that I'd be willing to send to Rob in a care package.. think he'd be interested??? LOL

    I cant believe I just outted myself as a closet Hanson fan but sometimes we do crazy things.

    PS I'm not willing to give up my NKOTB or BSB shirts for him... sorry Rob I know your thinking "What the hell?? I really want those shirts." with a fuckawesome pouty face. LMAO

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  18. Oh Oh I am old!! I went to that Beastie Boys concert in 1987! WTF! My brain is still telling me I am a teenager. . . did anyone find it while googling?

    On a separate note, I really enjoy this blog, and for someone that has 39 waving to me for my next "special day" this blog keeps me younger, at least in heart. So, Thank you.

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  19. I found the shirt, it is selling for $249 on a few websites, once you add in get off my dick as a search then it comes up.

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  20. Okay, I'm too old for Beastie Boys but I do have a good story that I posted a while back... Shortly after the original photo, I'm doing laundry and I come across a BLACK V-NECKED TEE that I do not own. I check around with possible minipetals sleepover sources (fine, I checked with only two)and no one claims it. It's fucking kismet!!! I love that shirt and wear it any time I want to feel sexy. Damn you Rob, damn you! (translation: I love yoy Rob, I love you;)

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  21. How sick is it that I'm actually thinking I could pony up $249 bucks for a 21yearold tshirt that I could only wear to bed, and then only when my hub isn't home - which is almost never!?!?!?!?

    Elle207

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  22. I am totally serious about buying that t-shirt btw. even though i know it's fucking ridiculous. i live in jeans and black t-shirts anyway (at least when JJ doesn't have me in dresses) so definitely expect to see me in this in forks!

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  23. Montreal is my hometown... and I have a spare bedroom for anyone who can help me spot Rob in town. Drive on down LKW!

    Locally we've heard nothing about the set location apart from what is being filmed in studios. My husband is out today, I'm going to be on the lookout!

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  24. I can't rectify the fact that the shirt is as old as he is. I really can't imagine him as a huge Beastie Boys fan. I'll say it, he seems a little to emo to appreciate the lyrical quality of "Girls" and "Brass Monkey"

    I seriously think some stylist bought him the shirt and told him to wear it.

    Granted, I would never say anything to his face. I'd believe whatever he wanted to tell me.

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  25. Just when I thought this blog could get no better, you guys go and link a Beastie Boys vid. Fucking awesome ladies. Fucking. Awesome.

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  26. LKW, I can't thank you enough for accepting STY and JJ's request to officially join the blog. Really. It's hard to think how they survived without you. You're just too fucking cool to not be directly involved with this tom fuckery........

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  27. "... not that I wouldn't give my left tit to have both of my hands firmly planted on said ass, preferably while he's thrusting into my va-jay-jay..." That sentence made me laugh my ass of, so blunt! Love it.

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  28. I can't stop thinking about the fact he is less than an hour away. I live in Montreal suburb. Apparently, he's been in town since thuesday. GOD!

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  29. @kassiecullen OH MY GOD ME TOO! I still have my Hanson shirts in the back of my drawer, haha!

    Not that I, uh, was ever a Hanson fan.... cough....

    SHUT UP I WAS TWELVE IN 1997!

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  30. hot freakin' damn, I loved these pics. I'm sorry, did you guys actually type any text? Oh fine, I'll go back and read ;)

    btw, you twatwaffles. WHEN are you going to announce the winner of the banner for Twitarded Goes to Forks?!?! You said you would that week (like I really believed you anyways).
    love, Cat

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  31. I LOVE THE "Best of Twitarded" feature! Thank you - that makes finding fav posts easier. My #1 favorite, please add: Real Life vs. Twi-life. That one SLAYED me. Tears streaming down my face crying. I'm grinning like an idiot now just thinking about it!

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  32. @XKR - Ask and you shall receive. Thanks for your input!! Mwah!

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  33. OFF?! WTF with OFF?! Like any of us, given the chance to get on, would EVER get OFF!
    W/V poted. I would gladly get poted with Robs alien baby & I shut up shop 12 years ago!

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  34. I know exactly what you mean. Last summer when Rob was filming Remember Me in NYC, I remember the day they filmed at the beach. A few days later I was in Hilton Head and when I went in the water I got all tingly! I just know it was because Rob probably waded in the same ocean days before me . . . (I mean who can resist getting their toes in the ocean?). . . and the currents brought that Holy Water right down past the coast of SC to me!

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  35. Feeling very old today because I saw that Beasties tour... Yeah, I was a young teen but Rob was like just born. Sigh...

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  36. Feeling very old today because I saw that Beasties tour... Yeah, I was a young teen but Rob was like just born. Sigh...

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  37. Dear Baby Jesus if you could just make ALL of RPattz' belts disappear that would be fantatbulous. Amen and THank you! ;-P

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  38. these are wonderful! have you seen the pictures of rob kissing kristen in montreal? ahhh! http://robpattinson.blogspot.com/2010/08/rob-and-kristen-together-in-montreal.html
    yall are hilarious!

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  39. these are wonderful! have you seen the pictures of rob kissing kristen in montreal? ahhh! http://robpattinson.blogspot.com/2010/08/rob-and-kristen-together-in-montreal.html
    yall are hilarious!

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  40. Someone got one up on eBay right now... http://ebay.to/1vE3FA2 bit rich for my blood

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