Friday, October 8, 2010

Something You Never Thought I'd Be Asking You (It Isn't Even Dirty!)

Yes, it's cliche, but it's a different generation, people!

OK so this is taking a bit of a leap, Twilighty-blog-post-wise, but fuck it it's the weekend and you've all probably already notice that we've taken an liiiiittle bit of liberty with the Twilighty-ness of the blog lately and nobody seems to mind so here goes nothing. Or something. Hopefully something. But whatever - jet lag has ruined me this week, my in-laws will be here this weekend and my house is trashed and scattered with mementos of a blog they must not find out about, and I'm in bit of a mood.

Here's the deal: I need your fave really really REALLY simple, basic recipes. As those of you who have been following along can possibly surmise, a certain someone's dad has recently become the main cook in his household for the first time in his life, and frankly people, he's a little lost. I knew we were in really big trouble the first time he called and told me how proud he was that he had cooked dinner for the first time - ever! - and it turned out he had reheated some fried chicken. Oh boy...

I didn't have the heart to say that putting this in the oven for 20 minutes doesn't really count as "cooking dinner"... Baby steps...

So I am in the [very slow, way-behind-schedule] process of putting together a binder with recipes in it. When I was a kid, Sister Snarky and I used to cook dinner - or at least get it started - most weeknights. My mom had made a three-ring binder with a bunch of recipes in it - simple things like pork chops, goulash, spaghetti and meat sauce - things a couple of kids who were busy swapping out the vodka in the liquor cabinet for water couldn't mess up TOO much. When my parents moved from New Jersey (where they had lived since 1975) to Savannah five years ago, they cleaned house and sold almost everything they owned. Started fresh. Thirty years of stuff gone in a series of epic garage sales. Although my sister and I looked for it, we never did find Mom's recipe binder. And we need it now, bad. So we're doing our best to recreate it.

This is the reaction I am going for.

Let me state for the record that growing up, food-wise, we were but a simple folk in the Snarky household and that's the way Papa Snarky still likes it. Picture a plate with meat, potato, veggie. Nothing fancy. If I had never worked in restaurants and had not tried different foods while there, I would probably still be eating that way.

Perfect except that EVERYONE knows you eat your salad before dinner.
This is America, people.Work with me here!

So humor me and share your fave recipes in the comments. Do you have an easy recipe for something that is a big hit with everyone?? Know how to roast a pork loin or make an awesome stew? How about fish of some sort?? Er I don't eat much seafood but I know if you wrap some fishy stuff up in foil or parchment paper and toss it in the oven, you have an easy-peasy meal in no time flat. I'm sending basic things like roast chicken, asparagus, spaghetti and meat sauce. I need a recipe for meatloaf because I know the one I have is too complicated. Think EASY. Nothing fancy. Not too many ingredients or steps. Although if anyone knows how to use a George Foreman rotisserie to make things, please chime in because we're all REALLY at a loss here. He has a slow-cooker but will probably get rid of it because he doesn't know how to use it (but it might be a GREAT thing for him to learn, really...). And can I say thanks in advance? I know that some of the things I have written here lately have been pretty self-indulgent... I promise we'll get back to our usual schedule of fuckery and nonsense faster than you can say "twatwaffle." Which reminds me--waffle recipes, anyone???

HEY! Look who I found on the very first page of my google image search for "men can't cook"!
(Please don't send me recipes involving Hot Pockets.)

113 comments:

  1. I'm on it. Let me go dig through recipes that I know I have typed up. Although most of them aren't! ARGH!

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  2. Would love to help - is your dad allergic to any foods? Anything he absolutley hates?

    I may be a total fuck up, but I do know how to cook. or so I've been told.

    Do you want recipes on the blog? Email might work better for the spelling impaired (me).

    You rock, daughter.

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  3. Turkey rice soup.
    I think this is my fav soup recipe.
    2 tbsp butter (and it has to be butter - none of that margarine crap)
    2 cups turkey diced.
    2 carrots, diced
    1 onion very finely diced
    2 celery stalks chopped
    1 tsp each, dried thyme and ground sage. I love sage so 1 tsp isn`t enough for me. So basically add it to taste, but start with at least 1 tsp
    2/3 cup parboiled long-grain white rice - i`ve been known to add a wee bit of wild rice too.
    3 cups turkey or chicken stock
    2 tbsp tomato paste
    2-3 tbsp all-purpose flour (in your case if you're avoiding gluten use corn starch)

    3 cups Milk
    pepper to taste

    1. In a large pot, melt butter over medium head.
    2. Cook carrots, onion, celery, thyme and sage stirring, for about 5 min or until onion is softened. Stir in rice. At this point your kitchen should smell like heaven.
    3. Add stock and tomato paste. Cover and bring to boil over high heat.
    4. Reduce heat to medium-low; boil gently for 15 min or until rice is almost tender.
    5. Stir in turkey and cook, uncovered, for about 5 min or until rice is tender. Keep the soup on a low temp and uncovered!!!
    6. Whisk flour into milk(cornstarch) in medium bowl. Microwave for 2-3 min - it should have started to thicken just a bit (if it's thickened too much don't worry). Now throw a couple of ladles of the soup broth into the bowl. This helps warm up the milk so that it doesn't curdle (and if it does - don't worry it'll still taste awesome)
    7. Gradually whisk into soup.

    Stir in pepper to taste.
    Now if you don't have cooked turkey or chicken lying around (which is most of the time for me!) you just to have to change a few things.

    After you melt the the butter, toss in the cut up chicken and cook for about 5 minutes until there's just a little bit of pink left on the chicken. Take the chicken out and put on a plate. Add a wee bit more butter and then carry on with step 2. Throw the chicken back into the pot (including any juices that have accumulated on the plate) about 10 min into step 4.

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  4. Easiest Lasagna Ever

    -no boil lasagna noodles
    -jar of prego
    -pre-shredded mozzerella cheese
    - tub of ricotta cheese

    In a casserole dish, 1 layer of noodles, then spread prego, then spread mozz. cheese, then spread ricotta cheese. Repeat. Back in oven at 350 for a half hour.

    bingo.

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  5. I know exactly what you are going thru. And I mean exactly. When my mom died in January, my dad had never cooked for himself. Ever. In his whole life. I attempted to do the exact same thing that you are doing here, but quickly realized that "recipe" was too fancy a term for what I was really attempting to do. What I ended up doing was making a list of really simple things my dad could make or heat up, but not exactly recipes. Just to get him going. Things like hot dogs, spaghetti, smoked sausage, tacos... pancakes, scrambled eggs... things he could make but would probably literally never think of on his own... And nine months later, my dad basically eats frozen meals and sandwiches everyday ;) But at least he's eating. That's all I care about.

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  6. CC - you are the bomb! miss you. still have your penis pops. don't give me that recipe ok??? mwah!

    @adonicass - he is very allergic to mangoes. and slighlty allergic to garlic but not really (or so my mom said). no major-major allergies aside from mangos. very thoughtful & thanks for asking!

    i felt like a bit of a tool posting this and you are making me feel better already...

    I need to shower and get out of the house (yes it's 11 p.m. but i don't care). bbl chickies! can't wait to see what you all come up with! i love cooking things up (and not just stories about me & rpatts) and might have to do some testing of everything. you know, just to make sure - lol...

    teary. gawd when did i become such a fucking sap?!

    mwah!

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  7. Using frozen meatballs makes this super easy to whip up...basically a dump, heat and serve kind of thing.

    Speedy Swedish Meatballs

    2lbs frozen meatballs
    vegetable oil
    2 tbs flour
    1 1/2 cups Whole Milk
    1 Can beef broth
    1/4 cup sour Cream
    Wide Egg Noodles

    Brown meatballs in oil and remove
    add flour to remaining oil and cook 1 min.
    stir in broth, mild and return meatballs until thick
    remove from heat
    add sour cream
    serve over noodles.

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  8. Meatloaf:
    1 and 1/2 pounds ground meat (beef, turkey)
    1/2 cup crumbs (cracker, tortilla chips, corn flakes, rice chex - I use my Grandma's hand crank grinder to make them small)
    2 beaten eggs
    1 8-ounce can of tomato SAUCE (not paste)
    1 teaspoon salt (or less)
    Seasoning of choice (I use Italian Seasoning and just sprinkle it over the bowl before mixing)

    Preheat oven to 350'
    Combine all ingredients using the fork you used to beat the eggs (if you used a FFOORRKK - had to do it).
    Put mix in loaf pan.
    Bake in oven for 1 and 1/4 hours.

    I never liked meatloaf until I made it myself now we have it at least once a month :) Enjoy!

    PS This recipe is from my Grandma's Better Homes and Gardens cookbook that has been passed down through the family.

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  9. @cat - nice! he thought lasagna was beyond him but that might change his mind!

    @freaky bella - yup - that's me now! although he can cook eggs, bacon, and make sandwiches. but dinner is not his turf. at. all.

    xo

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  10. @dangrdafne & toefunny - thank you!!! those both look right up his alley... he's on the "kiss" meal program - "keep it simple stupid" and all that... he doesn't have his sea legs yet in the kitchen but he'll get there. : )

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  11. @dangrdafne & toefunny - thank you!!! those both look right up his alley... he's on the "kiss" meal program - "keep it simple stupid" and all that... he doesn't have his sea legs yet in the kitchen but he'll get there. : )

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  12. i love chicken cordon bleu, but can't be fucked pounding out chicken breast and splattering Salmonella all over my kitchen. So, I made a delicious casserole recipe instead.

    4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (nyuk, nyuk)cut into 2" cubes
    1/4 lb sliced swiss cheese chopped up
    1/4 lb sliced deli ham chopped up
    1tbsp butter
    1tbsp flour
    1cup chicken stock
    bread crumbs to sprinkle on top

    melt butter over med/low heat, then add flour and stir. Whisk in chicken stock (you can double this sauce recipe if you want lots of gravy), bring to a low boil while whisking, until thickened.

    put chicken, in 9" square casserole dish, spread cheese and ham on top. Pour sauce over chicken mixture and mix lightly so the sauce coats the chicken. sprinkle with bread crumbs. bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes, until bubbly.

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  13. Breaded Fish.

    Works for any fish, lots of options for spices! The fillets don't have to be fresh or even defrosted.

    4 fish fillets.
    2 egg whites
    1 cup of bread crumbs
    1-4-1/3c of grated Parmesan cheese.
    1 tsp of dried orgegano
    1 tsp of garlic powder.

    Place egg whites plus 1-2tbsp of water into pie plate. Beat with a fork.

    Place bread crumbs, cheese and spices onto wax paper.

    Take fish fillet and dip into egg white mixture. Place fillet into bread crumb mixture coating all sides.

    Here's the whacky part. Put that fillet BACK into the egg white mixtue. Crazy, I know. The redo the bread crumb thing.

    It's like shampooing your hair but instead of "lather, rinse, repeat" it's "eggwhite, bread crumbs, repeat" probably tastes better too.

    Bake at 375 for 20 min or until fish flakes with a fork and is opaque.

    Some other spices I'll use include paprika, chili powder, chinese five spice powder, lemon pepper, etc

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  14. Crockpot Chili

    Whatcha Should Be Needing ... plus a few extras for kick:

    * 1 pound Ground Beef/Chuck
    * 1 whole Medium Onion, Chopped
    * 1 can Red Kidney Beans
    * 1 can Pinto Beans
    * 1 can Chili Beans
    * 2 cans Mexican Style Diced Tomatoes
    * 1 small can diced green chiles
    * ½ can Water (use the tomatoes can)
    * Salt And Pepper (to Taste)
    * ½ teaspoons Ground Cumin
    * 1 teaspoon Red Chili Flakes
    * 2 Tablespoons Chili Powder Or One Packet Chili Powder
    * 2 Tablespoons of Worcester Sauce
    * 1 cup Cheddar Cheese, Shredded (optional)
    * 1 tub Sour Cream (optional)
    * 1 whole Red Onion, Small, Diced (optional)
    * 1 package Saltine Crackers (optional)


    1. Brown the ground beef/chuck with some salt and pepper.

    2. After the ground beef/chuck is browned. Put a nice rough chop on your onions. In chili, I almost prefer to pulverize the yellow onions because I add red onion on top at the end. But, some folks to like big pieces of cooked yellow onion.


    3. Add your browned beef/chuck and onions to the crock pot and then top with one packet of chili seasoning. Here you can also add about a teaspoon of salt, 1/2 teaspoon of black pepper,1/2 teaspoon ground cumin, and 1 teaspoon of red chili flakes or cayenne. You can adjust the chili/cayenne to your liking.

    4. Now add in your tomatoes and your water. I suggest half a can of water because you'll have all of the juices of the tomatoes and beans, but if you prefer a more saucy chili, just add more water.


    5.) Now add in the green chiles and two Tablespoons of Worcestershire sauce .

    6.) You could easily stop right here and just have normal red chili. But, the addition of beans is crucial around this household. I usually add two cans of pinto beans and 1 of red kidney. Sometimes I'll even find canned chili beans and I'll use one can in place of one of the cans of pinto beans.


    7.) Now put the lid on your crock pot and let it go on low for at least 6 hours. But, really, it could simmer on the stove on medium for about an hour to achieve the same taste.

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  15. ----------

    Baked Chimichangas

    Whatcha need:

    1 medium white or yellow onion
    1 green bell pepper
    1 packet of taco seasoning
    1 pound round steak (or other cheap cut of meat)
    1 small can of tomato sauce
    10 burrito sized tortillas
    1 small can refried beans
    1 cup cheddar cheese, shredded
    2 tablespoons vegetable oil

    Chop up a white onion and one green bell pepper. Put them in a crock pot with a pound of round steak (or whatever cheap meat you got), 1 can of tomato sauce, and one packet of taco seasoning.

    Cook your mixture on high for 6 hour or low on 8 hours. Then shred the meat with tongs when it's done cooking. It should fall apart fairly easily for you.

    Now, preheat your oven to 400 degrees and oil the bottom of a foil lined pan.

    Slather a few tablespoons of refried beans on your tortillas.

    Then add a few healthy pinches of cheddar cheese.

    Top the pile with meat mixture.

    Roll it up like a burrito (after all, a chimichanga is just a deep fried, or in our case baked, burrito).

    Brush on a little bit of vegetable oil. And put it in your preheated oven until they're toasty brown.

    Top those babies with more cheese, salsa, sour cream, guacamole, or whatever else your heart desires.

    -----------

    Simple Potato Soup

    Whatcha Need:
    Potatoes- peeled, chopped, boiled, and strained
    1 Lg. can chicken noodle soup
    1 Lg. can cream of chicken soup
    2 C. milk
    salt, pepper, and garlic powder

    First, boil your chunked up potatoes until they are just a bit past fork tender. Don't let them go very far past fork tender or the starches will develop too much and you'll just have a pot of mash on your hands. These are tender enough that when I stir them they start to fall apart. I like that for a soup consistency.

    Add in your large can of chicken noodle soup. I just use good ol' condensed Campbells. But, you can add in whatever special soup you like right here. Just use the large can.


    Add in your shredded chicken and your large can of cream of chicken soup.


    Salt and pepper and garlic powder that pot of comfort.


    Now, start pouring milk and stirring. Stop pouring when the soup is the consistency that you like.

    It's done! YUM! Now, you can eat as is or you can hook it up with some bacon bits, sour cream, or green onions.

    _________________

    White Chicken Chili

    Whatcha Gonna Be Needin':
    1 lg. white onion, chopped
    1 tsp. vegetable oil
    1 C. shredded chicken
    1 small can green chiles
    1 can medium Rotel
    3 cans Great Northern Beans
    8 oz. monterrey jack cheese, cubed or shredded
    8 oz. pepper jack cheese, cubed or shredded

    Get your onions all chopped and tossed in with some oil in a hot pan. Get those babies translucent.

    Toss your chopped or shredded chicken pieces in here.

    Now mix in your can of green chiles.

    Mix in that can of Rotel. I use mild Rotel but you can use hot, if you feel the need to breathe fire.

    Add a can of white beans (navy).


    Now mix in the milk and add a little salt and pepper. Turn the heat down to about medium low right about here.


    Add in some diced up or shredded cheese.


    Melt your yummy cheese into the pot now. Keep stirring so it breaks up and doesn't burn to the bottom.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Simple Roasted Chicken

    Ingredients:
    1 3-4 lb. chicken
    onion powder
    salt
    black pepper
    1/2 stick butter (I use light)
    1 stalk/bunch of celery

    Rinse out your bird, then sprinkle the inside and outside generously with onion powder, salt, and pepper.

    Now, rub some butter all over the bird. Tuck some inside the cavity, under skin, and on top of the bird. This will help create a crisp skin and seal the juice into the meat.

    Now, tuck that celery into the cavity of the bird. Don't make it tight but don't let it wiggle and wobble.

    Put it into the oven at 350 degrees uncovered for appr. 30 minutes per pound. Just make sure the juice is running clear and the center of the thickest portion of meat is at least 180 degrees.

    ReplyDelete
  17. The easiest meal I make, seriously, is BBQ ribs. Simply put the ribs (whatever kind he prefers, country, spare, pork, Derek's (shoops, sorry Myg), in a shallow oven proof pan.

    He can use bottled BBQ sauce (I make my own - 2 cans Hunt sauce, 1 c. catchup, 2 TB Westcheshire Sauce., 1/4 c. packed brown sugar, grate an onion in for extra taste)

    Pour sauce over ribs, cover, with lid or foil, place in the 325 oven for at least an hour and a half. For a more complete meal,toss a couple of large baking potates in the oven, too.

    Much easier than cooking the ribs entirely outside. Sometimes my hub will pull the ribs out of the oven after 45 min or so, and cook outside on the gas gill for a few minutes.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Crockpot Coke Roast. Three ingredients!

    Roast (I usually get a 2lb shoulder roast but any kind will do)

    One can Coke (and I do mean the real Coca Cola!)

    One can cream of chicken soup

    Dump it all in the crock pot and cook on low for 8 hours or so. Done!

    I know it sounds bizarre but trust me, the Coke and soup blend together to make a VERY tasty sauce.

    If you get enough recipes, you should compile a Twitarded cookbook and sell them. The proceeds could go towards your next trip to FOOOOOORKS! or establish a fund for Breaking Dawn set stalking. :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Don't ditch the slow cooker! You need to get him the book "Fix It and Forget It"...lots of recipes - many of them w/just a few ingredients - that you throw in and simmer all day.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Hawaiian Meat Balls.
    For the meat balls.
    1 lb ground beef or turkey
    1 egg
    2 tbsp soy sauce
    1/2c bread crumbs
    1-2 cloves of fresh garlic (1-2tsp of granulated garlic works too.)

    Throw those into a bowl. Mash up. Roll into 1-2 inch balls. Toss in the fridge for 20 min to firm up. (I'd make some joke about firming up ball here - but that would be inappropriate). Toss in a skillet until cooked.

    OR you can just buy some premade ones and defrost 'em.

    Take 1 red and 1 green pepper and roughly cut up.

    Finely dice 1/2 a medium onion.

    Mince 1-2 garlic cloves.

    Combine in a bowl:
    1/4c soy sauce
    1/4c ketchup
    2 tbsp brown sugar
    2 tbsp white vinegar


    Throw 1-2 tbsp of oil into a skillet.

    Cook onion and garlic on med-high heat until softened.

    Throw red and green peppers a cook for a few minutes.

    Open a can of canned tidbit sized pineapple and toss it into the skillet. Juice and all!!

    Toss in the rest of the sauce.

    Put the meatballs into the sauce and cook on med-high heat for 10-15 minutes.

    Take 2 tbsp of cornstarch and mix with 1 tbsp or more of water (can you tell I don't really measure!?). Pour slowly into bubbling liquid, stirring contantly until thickened.

    Serve over rice.

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  21. Oh girl. I can HOOK YOU UP. If you want easy recipes, I'm your man. Some favs:

    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/nigella-lawson/one-pan-sage-and-onion-chicken-and-sausage-recipe/index.html *Literally my #1 go-to for having guests (made for in-laws yesterday!). So freaking easy and everyone RAVES about it.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paula-deen/olivias-buttermilk-pie-recipe/index.html *I add orange extract for more flavor.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/giada-de-laurentiis/stracciatella-soup-recipe/index.html *Could not be easier, and SO good.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/rachael-ray/almond-crusted-chicken-cutlets-with-scallion-beurre-blanc-recipe/index.html *Easy and fancy!
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/robin-miller/quick-orzo-salad-recipe/index.html *Great side dish, even better as leftovers.
    http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2009/07/billies-italian-cream-cake-recipe *Searched out Italian Cream Cake recipe thanks to EP. SO GOOD.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paula-deen/pumpkin-cheesecake-recipe/index.html *Pumpkin cheesecake, HELLO?! Forget all the complicated stuff - substitute pumpkin pie filling.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/buffalo-chicken-dip-recipe/index.html *Droooool.
    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paula-deen/fried-ravioli-with-marinara-cream-sauce-recipe/index.html *Time consuming - but my friends have started begging for this by name when I have a party.
    ****Last: Pumpkin Chili! 1 can each: diced tomatoes, "chili hot" beans (not rinsed), kidney beans (rinsed), pinto beans (rinsed), tomato sauce, pumpkin (NOT pie filling). 1 packet chili seasoning, 2tsp cinnamon, 2tsp garlic powder, 2tsp oregano, 1tsp ground clove, salt/pepper, cheddar cheese for topping, 1pkg ground beef. Mix all but beef and 1/2 seasoning packet in crock pot, cook all day on low. Then brown beef with rest of seasoning, combine before serving. Top with cheddar. This stuff is LIKE CRACK. No joke.

    Can't wait to try these other recipes! Thanks yall!

    ReplyDelete
  22. Lemon Dill Chicken.

    Preheat oven to 425F

    Combine in a bowl:
    1 cup sour cream
    1 tbsp dried dill
    1 teaspoon lemon pepper
    1 teaspoon lemon zest (Take a lemon and run it over the small holes of the grater)

    Spray a medium casserole dish with non-stick spray. Spoon 1/4 of the lemon-dill sauce over bottom. Arrange chicken breasts in a single layer. Pour the rest of the sauce over chicken. Spread evenly.

    Bake uncovered fro 30-35 minutes until chicken is tender and not pink.

    p.s. it's hard to write a recipe and not swear like a trucker.

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  23. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  24. Frig! For the last recipe you need 4 boneless skinless chicken breasts.

    ReplyDelete
  25. This is really easy - only takes 10 mins in the kitchen (which is how I like to cook!)
    Hoping that all the ingredients are the same in America. I've converted the oven temp to Fahrenheit (And hoped I've got it right)

    Leek and Bacon Pie
    2Tbs of oil
    2 Leeks, pale section only, thinly sliced
    4 rashers of bacon, finely chopped
    2cloves of garlic, crushed
    broccoli, cut into small pieces
    1 cup milk
    1 cup grated cheese
    4 eggs
    (mixed salad and bought garlic bread to serve)

    1. Preheat oven to 355 deg. Lightly grease a 24cm round pie dish.
    2. Heat oil in frying pan, add leek, bacon and garlic. Cook and stir for 4 -5 minutes or until leek has softened.
    3. Bring a medium saucepan of water to the boil over moderate heat. Add broccoli; cook for 2 minutes and drain.
    4. In the pie dish, add the broccoli , top with leek mixture.
    5. Whisk eggs, milk and cheese in a large jug. Season with pepper.
    6. Pour egg mixture of broccoli. Bake for 15 minutes. Reduce oven temperate to 340 degrees and bake for another 15 minutes.
    Remove from oven, stand in the pan for 5 minutes, cut into wedges. Serve with salad and garlic bread.

    ReplyDelete
  26. here's a marinade that makes everything taste fantastical and no its not Italian dressing.

    Cut up a large Poblano pepper (remove the seeds if you're worried about the heat) - its a mexican green pepper not too hot but smoky tasting, 1/3 c olive oil, tsp chopped garlic (the kind from a jar is fine or 1/2 tsp or garlic powder), small handful of cilantro more if you like it, a squeeze of lime juice, salt and pepper to taste. Blend it all in the blender. its gonna be green and somewhat chunky. Its should smell very strong but fresh.....soak any meat in it and grill/saute/bake - chicken is good, steak is amazing and mahi mahi is fabulous. since it has a mexican flare I usually serve it with
    my rice & beans-
    saute chopped small onion and poblano pepper, 1/2 tsp cumin, salt & pepper to taste add chicken or vegetable broth and cook favorite rice in it instead of water. when rice is done add corn and black bean or pinto beans. my husband likes it if I put in a can of diced tomatoes......drink margaritas.

    here's a new one I made up after having similar dish at this great little Irish Pub super easy but delicious. If you have a costco- get their italian sausages "primo" I think but Johnsville works just fine.....

    cooks sausages completely in oven in a pan or grill whatever works for you....

    open up the grands big and flaky crescent rolls and cut each triangle into two triangles, cut each sausage in half and roll the crescent rolls around the sausage and bake until golden brown per directions on the rolls.

    serve with your favorite fancy stone ground or deli mustard.

    mmm mmm good.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Oh my Gawd, I am so stealing some of these recipes! *copies and runs*

    STY, your post had my crying...geez. I admit, I was a sap pre-Forks though ;) But seriously, my Dad can barely make a grilled cheese...so thinking of your Dad on his own got me all sniffley again.

    Ok...healthy Turkey Chili ;)Great for Fall!

    2 cups chopped white onion
    1 cup of chopped green bell pepper
    1/4 cup of olive oil
    2 (35 oz) cans of stewed/crushed tomatos.
    2tbs tomato paste
    2 (15 oz) cans of kidney beans, drained.
    3/4 cup of chicken or turkey stock.
    3tbs chili powder
    1 tbs ground cumin
    1 tbs salt
    1 tsp black pepper
    3-4 cups of ground turkey

    In a large 8 qt pot, cook the onion & green pepper over medium heat w/ olive oil.

    Stir in chili powder, cumin then add in tomatos, paste, stock, beachs, salt, pepper, and cooked turkey. Bring mixture to a slow boil then reduce heat to simmer. Simmer uncovered for an hour or more.

    You can add some sugar (which I do) to counteract the acidity of the tomatoes.

    Ok I just realized being from San Diego I should have give you a kick ass fish or Mexican recipe...more to come...via email.

    xo J

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  28. Oh shitballs someone beat me to the Chili...FML. Oh well, can never have enough, right? lol

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  29. @CC- I am so trying some of your recipes!

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  30. This is my version of fancy cookin':

    Toss some pork chops in the fry pan with a little oil and brown on both sides.
    Toss in a can of Campbells garlic mushroom soup. To get really fancy, add chopped mushrooms as well.
    Put lid on pan and simmer until chops are cooked.

    Toss a few potatoes in the microwave (I prefer red ones)to cook.

    Make a salad
    OR
    make sure he has one of those metal steamer thingies that fits in a saucepan.
    put 1/2 inch water in bottom of pan!!!!!
    Pour frozen (or fresh) veggies into steamer/pan.
    Cook on high for a few minutes - Test for doneness and DO NOT forget about the water. (There is nothing stinkier than scorched broccoli.)

    Voila - dinner. And leftovers.

    Cooking is not my favorite pasttime. I can think of several things I'd rather be doing (reading FF?)than spending time in the kitchen.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Sloppy Joes? A pound of hamburger, a can of Manwich, and a pack of squishy buns. There's probably a tomato in the sauce, right? Or maybe a sliced tomato on the side would be better.

    Genny

    ReplyDelete
  32. Grilled chicken POCKETS (OK, "Packets" is what the recipe says, dammit):

    heavy duty aluminum foil, torn into approx 12" pieces
    4 boneless,skinless chicken breasts, trimmed
    1 lg can whole kernal corn, drained
    1 jar BBQ sauce (I love Sweet Baby Rays)
    chopped onion
    chopped green pepper

    Put all ingredients together in aluminum foil square (1 pc chicken to 1 pc alum foil). Cover with BBQ. Grill till no longer pink; approx 20mins.

    Enjoy.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Ok, Diced stew meat, sprinkled with flour, cook it real high in a little oil, till browned, throw it in a crock pot with a cup or so of beef broth, cook it for a few hours and serve it with a baked potatoe or even a twice baked potatoe and a bag of steamed veggies. Super easy and yummy!!!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Paula Deen Chili Recipe

    Ingredients:
    1 lb ground beef (I only use 1/4lb)
    1 medium onion
    1 green bell pepper
    2 15 oz. cans Ranch Style Beans
    1 15 oz. can diced tomatoes
    1 15 oz. can tomato sauce
    2 tablespoons chili powder
    salt
    pepper

    Directions:
    1. brown ground beef; add onion and green bell pepper about halfway through; add salt (I like Kosher salt for cooking) and pepper (to taste)

    2. add Ranch Style beans, diced tomatoes, tomato sauce and chili powder; stir it all up and let it cook on low heat for about 30 minutes

    Very easy and very good!

    Michelle

    p.s. you can get diced onion and green bell pepper in frozen form -- it's not as good as fresh, but it works and if you don't have fresh on hand, but you have frozen you can still whip something up without going to the store

    ReplyDelete
  35. Super Yummy Italian Pasta Salad

    You will need:
    16 oz. package corkscrew pasta
    1 pkg sliced salami (cut into small pieces)
    1 large tomato (diced)
    1 can olives (sliced and drained)
    1/2 sweet onion (diced)
    1 small jar marinated artichoke hearts (quartered)
    Newman's Balsamic Vinegarette Salad Dressing

    Cook pasta until tender and rinse w/ cold water. Add salami, and veggies. Add Vinegarette

    ReplyDelete
  36. First I've got to say, I married my husband because he knows how to cook. Truly, I always hated cooking. However, I have many easy peasy recipes that are super yummy.

    I will go through our recipes and email them to you.

    Love ya Snarky!

    ReplyDelete
  37. I highly recomend a website, www.thecookingguy.com . It's where I get alot of my recipes and I'm not a very good cook. There are many very simple recipes that don't require weird ingredients. I highly recomend the bruschetta pasta with some grilled chicken (which you can do on the George Foreman) on top.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Imma gonna steal some of these! I can cook, but mostly I won't so any inspiration is welcome. Some of these look great so the stealing is commencing. I'll just say I got them from a bunch of h00rs.

    ReplyDelete
  39. My 12 year old son can make these so dads should be good to go
    ~Stuffed Soup~
    1 can campbells chunky chicken n corn chowder
    1 box cornbread stovetop stuffing
    mix soup and dry stuffing mix together, dump it in a bread pan and bake it on 350 for about 20 - 30 min~ taadaa

    ~meatloaf~
    1.5 lb ground beef
    1 egg
    dash o italian dressing
    dash o steak sauce
    salt pepper n garlic as preffered by the sook ( i just shake in a bit of each)
    1/2 cup italian style breadcrumbs
    mush it all together with clean dry hands, form into loaf and put in brownie pan, cover top of loaf with ketchup and bake on 350 for 35-50 min (usually depends on fat content of the meat)

    ~taco casserole~
    1lb groung beef
    1pkg taco seasoning
    1 can tomato sauce
    2 cp water
    1 bag tortilla chips
    Brown meat,drain. add taco seasoning mix- tomato sauce and water. Heat till boiling. line casserole dish with tortilla chips, pour meat mixture over chips add more chips to top. cook on 350 for 15-20 min add shredded cheese to the top and cook another 5-10 min or until cheese is melted.
    ( I usually have sour cream , shredded lettuce, and tomatoes on the table when I make this to give it a taco salad kinda feel.

    Hope those are ok, I've got tons more that involve 5 ingredients or less cause I'm lazy and it's too damn expensive to feed a family of 6 complicated meals so if you need any more just shoot me an email. Porphyrias_Curse@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  40. @Kintail~ I was going to pretty much put the same recipe down as you (minus xtra fungus) except we have it with rice and then use some of the sauce to pour on it...yummmmmmm.
    I'm lucky that my fiance is a chef so he does more cooking than I do,but I'm learning. You can usually find a lot of simple recipes on the campbells soup site or the kraft site as well.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Somerset chicken, its easy and i could eat it forever.
    This one serves 6 but you can halve the ingredients if you want.

    6 boneless chicken breasts with the skin on.
    3tbsp olive oil
    75g butter
    2 onions, sliced
    4tbsp plain flour
    2tbspwhole grain mustard - the more mustard the better i think
    2 dessert apples, peeled and sliced into batons
    110g button mushrooms, sliced
    250ml chicken stock
    300ml cider
    250ml double cream
    1tbsp finely chopped sage leaves
    300g Cheddar cheese, grated
    6 baked potatoes

    1.Preheat the oven to 200°C (gas mark 6). Season the chicken breasts with salt and black pepper.

    2.Heat a large saute pan and add 2tbsp of the oil and 50g of the butter.

    3.Fry the chicken breasts in batches for 1-2 mins on each side until golden. Put them into a deep-sided oven tray and roast for 25 mins until the chicken is cooked through.

    4.Add the remaining butter and oil to the pan and cook the onions for 4-5 mins until softened but not coloured. Add the flour and mustard to the pan and cook for another 2 mins. Add the apples and button mushrooms and cook for 1 min. Pour in the chicken stock and bring to the boil, then pour in the cider. Bring back to the boil and cook for 5 mins. Add the cream and sage, cook for another 5 mins, then season with salt and black pepper.

    5.Take the chicken out of the oven and pour the sauce into the dish to cover the chicken completely. Preheat the grill to high. Sprinkle the cheese over the chicken and place under the grill for 5 mins until the cheese is melted, golden and bubbling. Serve with jacket potatoes topped with a knob of butter.

    It's English but its goooooooood.

    ReplyDelete
  42. hmmmm going to be some recipe stealing here too ;)

    I LVOE this website - it's sooo easy to use and my kids can cook from it too wioth the step by step piccies... http://www.exclusivelyfood.com.au/

    As for easy recipes, nothing beat a slow cooked chook (had it for dinner in fact) Grab the chook, toss it in the crockpot/slowcooker and put on "auto" for 6-8 hours - it literally falls off the bone - sooooooo juicy!! Simple eh ;)

    Or try getting a thigh fillet of chicken, lay it open, add a bit of crushed garlic, a sliver of cheese and roll it up. Then roll around a rasher of bacon and hold together with a tooth pick - it should look like a stuffed sausage kind of shape. Roast in a med oven for 30-45 mins... very yummy :)

    ReplyDelete
  43. shoot - it's too late to type properly, or even read!!! I thought I fixed my typo's!?!?! guess this little Aussie is off to bed xxx

    ReplyDelete
  44. Some of my fav go to meals are sausage (Hilshire farm, basically just have to heat it), with mac&cheese and a can o' peas.
    Beanie-weinies-2 cans of pork beans, plus a pack of hot dogs (what can I say, I live with children)
    I also found I like Shake 'n Bake stuff, they have different flavors, so it's not always the same thing.
    Also, to mix up the same old potatoes, cut potatoes into cubes, add enough vegetable oil to cover, add whatever spices you think will taste good (I ususally put season all, garlic powder, italian seasoning) and bake at 400 degrees for about 25 minutes, or until soft.
    Hope this helps!

    ReplyDelete
  45. i have a great go to chicken casserole that my children LOVE. it has meat, starch, and veggies!

    4 thighs or breasts (bone in, but can be skinless for less fat)
    1 cup rice
    1 cup water
    1 can cream of mushroom soup
    1 can cream of celery soup
    1/2 can milk
    celery seed
    poultry seasoning
    salt/pepper
    minced onions (raw or dehydrated will work)

    preheat oven to 350 degrees
    spray 9x13 dish with non-stick spray
    put chicken in 9x13 dish salt and pepper
    add cup of rice
    cup of water
    mix soups with 1/2 can of milk and pour over chicken
    sprinkle celery seed, poultry seasoning and minced onions (to your taste preference)
    add whatever vegetable you want (i use california mix, just broccoli, or green beans)
    cover with foil cook for 1-1.5 hr based on oven.

    hope he can use the recipe!!! it's so awesome you're doing this for your dad!!!

    ReplyDelete
  46. I know there have been a couple of Chili recipes but here is the easiest one I have ever seen:

    1 lb lean ground beef or lean ground turkey
    1 onion diced
    1 can red kidney beans
    1 can pinto beans or chili beans
    1 can pork and beans
    Chili powder to taste

    Brown meat and onion and drain. Open and pour beans along with the juice into meat mixture. Season to taste with chili powder. Let simmer for 15 minutes for flavors to marry. This is even better as leftovers. Recipe is easy to double and triple.
    I got this recipe in my home economics class in high school way back when and still use it today.


    As far as the rotisserie goes take a whole chicken and season it with Red Robin seasoning. Cook for 1 hour in your rotisserie or till it temps out at 165 degrees. You can purchase it at any Red Robin for $3.50 per big bottle. It is the best seasoning for chicken and pork chops.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Have only skimmed through the comments, so if this is repetitive, sorry!

    DON'T GET RID OF THE SLOW COOKER!

    Easiest recipe on Earth:

    onion soup mix

    +

    1 cup water (to mix with the soup mix)

    +

    frozen meat (tiny of roast beef or pork, turkey breast, chicken legs or whole chicken.)

    =

    fabulous dinner!

    Put the frozen meat into the slow cooker, pour the water/soup mix over top, and cook on low (6-7 hours for poultry; 5-6 hours for beef and pork). DONE! Toss a stabbed potato in the microwave and add a can of veggies and done, complete with a bit of tasty jus to spoon over your meat if you like!

    STY, tell him we're all rooting for him, and that these ideas all come with love. :)

    ReplyDelete
  48. I know something that almost everyone loves, but I wouldn't really call it a recipe. Little Smokies. They're little tiny smoked sausages that come in a package (1 lb I think). Dump those in a pan with some bbq sauce and cook until they're warmed up. Simple and delicious. The amount of bbq sauce depends on how much you like. Sometimes I use half a bottle, sometimes more, sometimes less. You can pair it with just about any side. My hubs LOVES these things. They're also good if you're having a party and you want little snacks to have around. Just put them in one of the little crock pot warmers and keep them heated up. Delicious.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Ever seen this book?
    "A Man, A Can, A Plan"
    You can find it on Amazon.

    We do random deliveries from Omaha Steaks to the in-laws to help supplement their cooking. They like it because they can mix and match meat with different side dishes and everything comes packaged in single servings that can be cooked easily.

    bonus is that delivery at the door gets big smiles! :)

    http://www.omahasteaks.com/servlet/OnlineShopping?Dsp=14&PCR=1:Assortments&PID=&IID=4665&ITMSUF=BND&shoptype=PROMOTION&shopsrc=PRMCategory+Featured&RAND=Q373188

    ReplyDelete
  50. Not sure if your dad does mexican, but this is a favorite in my house (and the hubby makes it, and the 5 year old eats it too)

    Cheesy Chicken Enchiladas

    Crock Pot on low
    for the Crock Pot you will need...
    1 can MILD Green Enchilada Sauce
    1 small can of diced green chiles
    2 chicken breasts (even frozen works here)
    1/2 C water
    dash of cumin, if so desired

    For the baking and assembling...
    1 Can of MILD green enchilada sauce
    1/2 block or 4 oz light cream cheese
    Whole Wheat tortillas or any 7-10" tortilla you like, you will need around 6 of them
    1-2Cups shredded Monterrey Jack Cheese (or another shredded cheese you like)

    Toss the Crock Pot ingredients in a crock pot and cook 4-6 hours on low. Remove Chicken from the crock, but reserve the liquid. "Shred" the chicken with a fork and stir in 4 oz (half a block) of low fat cream cheese adding some of the cooking liquid from the crock to taste and consistency. I like it to be kind of thick so i usually just add the chiles and a little liquid.

    Spray an 8x8 pan, take whole wheat 7-10" tortillas and put in about 1/4-1/2 cup of chix mix. Roll in and place in the pan. Fill the pan, top with another can of green enchilada sauce, top with 1 1/2 cups of shredded Monterrey Jack cheese (or whatever you like) bake at 350 until the cheese is melted and bubbly. Serve with a little sourcream!

    YUM!!!

    ReplyDelete
  51. I love giving recipes away! I hope these recipes are easy enough...

    Crock-pot Beef Stew (what guy doesn't like beef stew??)
    2 lb. beef chuck cubed
    1/4-1/2 cup flour
    1 tsp. Worcestershire sauce
    1 1/2 tsp salt
    1/2 tsp pepper
    1 can beef broth
    1 clove garlic, minced (can be left out if he's allergic)
    1 bay leaf
    4 carrots, sliced
    2 onions, chopped
    1 celery, sliced
    3 potatoes, diced
    1 tsp paprika
    Place beef in crock-pot. Combine flour, salt, pepper, and paprika. Coat beef with flour mixture. Add remaining ingredients. Stir well. Cover and cook for 8-10 hours on LOW or 4-6 hours on HIGH. Stir before serving.

    Chicken Pie
    Pillsbury pie crust
    1-2 lbs. cooked chicken
    Frozen vegetables

    Yellow Sauce:
    Melt 2 tbsp butter
    Mix with 2 tbsp flour
    Add 1 cup chicken broth
    Cook until boiling and then simmer until thick. Using a whisk, constantly stir this while cooking.

    Combine all ingredients and place in pie plate lined with 1 pie crust. Cover with other pie crust and fold edges under. Cook for 45 minutes at 400 degrees.

    Good luck with the rest of your recipe collecting!! : ) xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  52. Easiest potato soup EVA!

    1 2lb bag frozen hashbrown potatoes
    3 cans chicken broth
    1 pkg peppered gravy mix (Pioneer brand, if you can find it)

    Mix it all together & bring to a boil. Turn temp down & let simmer for about 20 minutes. YUMMM!!

    ReplyDelete
  53. Thought I'd add my favorite meatloaf recipe in here too. I call it "Irma Rombauer Can Suck It Meatloaf" - even though she is kinda my hero for creating recipes even i can make).

    Preheat oven to 350, grease pan of your choice - traditionally, this would be a loaf pan but my husband loves it when i make meatloaf in a extra large muffin tin. Meat muffins goooooood. And easy to pack as leftovers - good serving size. OR if you like the crunchy bits like i do, just construct a loaf-like shape on a baking sheet and you get crust galore!!

    1.5 lbs turkey meat (gotta think of dad's heart and my husband actually prefers the turkey over beef and that's saying somethin')
    1.5 cups chopped onion (sweet yellow is the yummiest)
    1 cup italian style breadcrumbs
    2/3 cup ketchup - i actually prefer to substitute half the ketchup for really yummy bbq sauce. it tastes effing amazing!!!
    2/3 cup chopped fresh parsley (i usually forget to buy this so that is why i use the preseasoned bread crumbs)
    3 large eggs, lightly beaten
    1 tsp salt
    1/2 tsp ground black pepper

    combine all until well blended but NOT overmixed. i find it is easier to mix all the ingredients and then add in the meat so you don't get those dry pockets of bread crumbs.

    fill the pan of your choice and cook for about an hour. cooking time depends on which pan you choose but if you have meat thermometer (mine was $5 at Target) then just cook until it reaches the appropriate temp (for beef or poultry).

    i hated meatloaf as a kid. seriously, any baked beef made me gag. but my husband absolutely adores it so i had to figure out how to make it work and now it is one of my favorite things to make. i usually serve this with broccoli (microwave-in-bag is the BEST INVENTION EVER) and really this is so hearty i don't usually need a starch.

    i'll dig around and see if i can find anything else.

    xoxo
    Laura

    ReplyDelete
  54. Since there's tons of chili recipes, here's a cornbread one to go with. Can't have chili without cornbread.

    Northern Cornbread

    1) Put oven rack to middle position and heat over to 400F. Generously coat an 8x8 inch square pan with vegetable oil spray

    2)Whisk in a large bowl:
    1 1/2c all-purpose flour
    1 c yellow cornmeal
    1/2tsp salt
    1/4tsp baking soda

    3)Take 1 cup of milk and add either 2tbsp vinegar or lemon juice. Let sit for a few minutes. Voila buttermilk!

    4)Now the recipe call for doing the next in a food processor, but I don't think I ever have. Instead I just usually defrost 3/4c of corn and mash the living daylight out of it.

    So in a large bowl put the buttermilk,
    1/4c of brown sugar
    2 large eggs
    the mashed corn from above.
    Mix really well.

    Melt 8 tbsp of butter (one stick) in the microwave.

    Now fold the egg/buttermilk mixture into the flour/cornmeal, then add the butter. Fold until just combined.

    Put the batter into the pan and bake for 35 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the centre comes out with only a few crumbs attacked.

    let to cornbread cool 10 minutes before flipping onto a wire rack.

    variations, I sometimes will grate a little bit of old cheddar cheese on top of the batter or even just put some coarsely ground black pepper on top before tossing into the over.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Dude's gotta have dessert at some point.

    Apple Crisp.

    Heat oven to 350F

    5-6 COOKING apples i.e. ones that won't turn to sauce a the first sign of heat. My fav to use are golden delicious or northern spy. 4 granny smith with 2 macintosh also work.

    Peel and slice apples into a large casserole.

    Toss in 3-4 tbsp of flour, 1/3c-1/2c of sugar, 1 tbsp cinnamon. Toss the apples so that they're all covered a bit.

    Take 1/4c room temp butter cut into pieces, 1/2c brown sugar, 2 tsp cinnmon, 1 1/2-2c of rolled oats (any kind will do), 2tbsp flour. You could be all fancy and use a pastry cutter or two knives to combine this, but I just use my fingers and mash this until I have a coarse crumbly mixture.

    Put topping on top of apples. Cover and bake 45 min or so.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Keep the slow cooker...you can dump anything in and forget it!

    Golden Pork Chops

    Pork Chops
    1 can Cream of Mushroom Soup
    1 cup water
    1 packet of French Onion soup
    1/2 cup onion
    1 can mushrooms (optional)

    Dump into slow cooker, stir and heat on low for 4-6 hours.

    I add a baked potato and you have a meal.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Chicken Pizzaiola

    Heat oven to 450F.

    Spread 3 cups of tomato sauce in a 9x13 glass baking dish.

    Pat 4 boneless skinless chicken breast dry with a paper towel. Sprinkle with pepper.

    Put 1 cup of parmesan Cheese grated (the real stuff is better, but the pregrated will do) in a shallow dish, then coat both sides of the chicken with the parmesan. Put the chicken on top of the tomato sauce.

    Bake for 15 minutes

    Sprinkle 1 cup grated mozzarella and 2oz of pepperoni (or any of your fav pizza toppings) on top of the chicken. Increase the oven temp to 475 and bake until the cheese melts and the chicken is fully cooked 5-10 minutes longer.

    ReplyDelete
  58. There is a cook book called A Man, A Can, A Plan. It is a cook book for guys and all the recipes are like 3 things and are super easy.

    When my Dad got sick he had to start staying home so my mom went back to work...this is how my Dad learned to cook : ) The recipes are really pretty good and it was way better then anything else he tried.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Wow, Papa Snarky sounds like me! Although as a 25 year old woman, I'm pretty sure my body can take the crap that I put into it at this point. Seriously, many nights, my dinner consists of cereal and beer. Classy.

    My favorite easy dish is fried rice. All you need is:

    -Rice (I like the easy-cook Uncle Ben's stuff that comes in portioned bags - literally all you do is put it in the hot water)
    -Chicken breasts
    -Assorted vegetables (I tend to prefer carrots and scallions, but whatever veggies you're partial to will work)
    -Soy sauce (I use the lite/low sodium)
    -Nonstick cooking spray
    -Eggs

    Cook your rice while you're washing and dicing vegetables and cutting the chicken into cubes. When you're ready, spray the pan with cooking spray, and scramble the eggs in there. When they're scrambled to your liking, pop them out onto a plate. Re-spray the pan with cooking spray and add the veggies. (When I cook this I add lots and lots and lots of garlic, but as your dad is "allergic," I skipped this. However, he can use salt and pepper or whatever seasonings he likes/has around the house on the veggies and chicken.) Cook til they get kinda soft, then add the chicken. Since it's in small cubes, it won't take very long for them to cook through, but of course make sure they're cooked! Finally, add the rice and the eggs, and add as much soy sauce as you like.

    TA-DA! That's literally it. It's idiot proof - I can attest to this because I've done it, and it hasn't been a disaster. Amazing!

    Good luck :)

    ReplyDelete
  60. I'm in South Carolina and was born and raised just across the river from Savannah. Here is a great easy vegetable soup that your dad won't have any problem finding the ingredients for in the south!

    Vegetable Soup with Turkey Kielbasa

    5 cans stewed tomatoes (any brand)
    2 bags Mackenzie's Frozen Vegetable Gumbo
    1 and 1/2 packages Hillshire farm Turkey Kielbasa (cut into bite sized pieces)
    Salt, Pepper, Italian Seasoning to taste

    Combine all ingredients in Crock Pot (break up the tomatoes with your hand or pour them in first and use a potato masher) and put on low for about 8 hours. You can also cook this in a dutch oven on the stove top in an hour or so, just bring to a boil then turn down to low heat for about an hour and a half, stirring frequently.

    I serve this with french bread or make sweet cornbread from the box (Jiffy Corn Muffin mix - super easy directions on the box)

    You can also substitute the Kielbasa with beef stew meat cut up small and browned in a skillet or even hamburger done the same way. This is a big pot of soup, so you could cut the ingredients in half to make half as much, or leftovers freeze well.

    Hope this recipe helps. It's my husband's favorite and is the easiest thing I make!

    ReplyDelete
  61. This one is super easy. It's original name was "Man-Catching Chicken", then after the man was caught it was changed to "PTA Night Peach Chicken". Since Daddy Snarky is most likely not into catching men or attending PTA meetings, you may rename as desired. Maybe "Rob is the Hottest Hunk of Man on the Planet Chicken"?

    1-2lbs chicken - Any type will work, but I like boneless, skinless.
    1 pkg. dry onion soup mix
    1 small jar peach or apricot preserves (8 oz.)
    1c french dressing (8 oz.) - the orange kind

    Oven 350F

    Place chicken in baking dish. Mix sauce ingred. together and pour over chicken. Bake until done 30-45 min., depending on the type of chicken you use.

    This is delicious! Great with rice (especially wild rice), and a salad.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Really Easy Salmon

    4 fillet salmon
    1/3c coarse ground Dijon mustard
    2tsp chili powder.

    Heat oven to 400F

    Combine mustard and chili powder.

    Coat one side of salmon and place in 9x13 pan.

    Bake for 20 minutes

    ReplyDelete
  63. I thought of an easy fish recipe to share. With 2 kids, a full time job, and a husband, sometimes I just don't have time to serve anything elaborate!

    Bam! Tilapia

    2 Tilapia fillets
    Emeril's Original Essence Seasoning
    Pam Non-Stick Cooking Spray
    1/2 of one lemon


    Coat a non-stick skillet with Pam and turn heat on Med/Hi. Liberally sprinkle Emeril's seasoning over both sides of the tilapia fillets. Add tilapia to skillet and cook on one side until brown, then turn over with wide slotted spatula and cook until the other side is brown. (About 3 or 4 minutes per side). Squeeze lemon juice over fish to finish.

    I serve this with Zatarain's Rice Pilaf (super easy directions on the box) and canned green beans that I've thrown a chicken bouillon cube into and warmed on the stove top.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Pancakes

    2 cups all-purpose flour
    2 tbsp sugar
    2 tsp baking powder
    1/2 tsp baking soda
    1/2 tsp salt

    Whisk to combine in bowl.

    In another bowl combine
    1 egg
    3 tbsp of butter melted
    2 c buttermilk (or 2c milk with 2 tbsp of vinegar or lemon juice)

    Make a well in the dry ingredients and toss in the buttermilk et al. Mix until JUST combined. i.e. there might be lumps, but they won't actually have flour in the lump if you smoosh it.

    Fold in 1 cup blueberries, chocolate chips, whatever floats your boat.

    Heat a skillet with 1-2tbsp vegetable oil on med-high heat.

    Pour 1/4c of batter per pancake. Now don't flip 'em until you see big bubbles in the pancake. The sides of the pancake will actually start to look cooked too. Basically about 2-3 min per side.

    ReplyDelete
  65. Good Morning, Sunshine! I saw that this posted while I was at the bar, and since I didn't have a chance to get to my Recipe Box o' Magic, I just wrote down some of the recipes that save my life. Then I woke up to read through the comments to find shit that hasn't been put up yet (although there are some KILLER recipes up here!).
    ___________________________________

    Pizza Casserole
    (My late G-pa's fave to make for me when I was a mini-Linds)

    1lb Ground Beef/Turkey cooked, drained
    1 (biggish) can of tomatoes, italian style *I like the stewed*
    Chopped Onion
    1 can sliced mushrooms (fresh work, but don't cook through as well)
    ..Pretty much anything else you'd put on a pizza. Pepperoni, green pepper, pepperocinis...
    1 bag of Shredded Mozz
    1 can of Pilsbury Crescent Rolls
    9x13 pan

    Oven at 350

    Cook beef and onions together in a large skillet, throw some S&P on it, some Italian Seasoning if you have it.

    Drain.

    Return to pan and add all other pizza things. Simmer for a few, just to cook through and get all the flavors partying together.

    Pour the numm-o mixture that smells amazing into the pan.
    Cover with Mozz. Don't be stingy. CHEESE FUCKING RULES.

    Roll out Crescent Rolls over top. It's okay if it tears a little, but the goal is to cover it all. There will probably be some space around the edges.

    Cook til the crescent rolls are done. 20 min or so...It freezes well, but doesn't microwave well (crescent rolls get soggy.) so reheat in the oven but keep an eye on it.
    _________________________________

    No Peek Chicken *Takes a while, but it's SO good*

    Can of Cream of Mushroom Soup
    1/2 can of Milk
    1 cup of uncooked rice
    2-3 Chicken Boobs

    Oven at 325

    Stir up the soup, milk and rice.

    Throw the chicken in a dish.

    Pour the mix on the chicks.

    Cover completely with tin foil.

    Bake for 2hrs.

    *I've done this recipe with a couple pork chops, too. Super yum.*
    ________________________________

    Dorito Chicken *The Bentist Makes This When The Doritos Get To Crumbs*

    Chicken Boobs
    1 c. Milk
    Seasoning (garlic, cajun, pepper, onion, whatev)
    Dorito Crumbs (Any seasoned chip will work. Except Baked Lays. Don't ask)

    Oven at 350

    Mix seasoning with milk, nothing major.

    Super crush the crumbs, throw in a ziplock.

    Soak boobs in milk, then throw in ziplock.

    SHAKE AND BAKE, BABY

    In the oven for 35 min or so, til the boobies are cooked.

    *This also works really well for whitefish! Just cook for 20-25 min instead!*
    ____________________________________

    Make Me Feel Fancy Roasted Potatos

    Red-Skinned Potatos (quartered)
    Olive Oil
    Seasonings of choice

    Oven at 350

    Throw on a baking sheet, drizzle with Olive Oil, shake on some seasonings (I use S&P, Italian (extra rosemary), and a dash of Cajun for a little kick)

    Roast for 20 min, rotate, then another 15.
    __________________________________

    Bad Ass Mac-n-Cheese

    Box 'o Mac
    Whatever the hell looks good.
    *I've used diced leftover chicken or ham, salsa, black beans...*

    Make the Mac as directed
    Mix in random stuff
    ___________________________________

    Quick note: RECIPEMATCHER SAVES LIVES!!! You just have to sign in, go to "My ePantry" and check off what you have in the house. Then you can "get recipes" and it tells you what you can make! That way, if you're one ingredient short or something, you can pop over to the store or something and you have an awesome dinner waiting!

    I FUCKING LOVE THIS SITE.



    I hope you're getting some keepers up in here for Poppa Snark. We're here for you, babe! We love you long time, so whatever you need, you know we'll do what we can!

    ReplyDelete
  66. okay---super easy meatloaf recipe that actually tastes good!!! and the bonus is that it will make two so he can freeze one for an even easier meal later on!

    2lbs lean gr beef
    1 box chicken stove top stuffing mix
    1/2 cup ketchup or bbq sauce

    mix everything, put into loaf pans(disposable ones are best for quick clean up) bake for 45 min to an hour at 375.

    ReplyDelete
  67. First of all, I am so sorry for your mother's death. I rarely comment, so I'm not sure if I've told you. Been there, done that. And them my father followed eight years later.

    Now, onto food for your dad ... sounds to me like if he's never cooked, he might not need recipes so much as easy things to eat that aren't horrible for him. So, my thoughts:

    Hormel has pork loins in different flavors (teriyaki, BBQ, citrus) that are excellent. All you do is roast them. They are in the meat case right next to the other pork products.

    Also in the meat section: Perdue whole roasters in a blue and green bag. Already cleaned, flavored and ready to go. You simply cut a vent in the top and roast for a couple of hours. SO SO good, and he could have a few meals, plus make chicken sandwiches.

    Perdue also sells single-wrapped chicken breasts already seasoned. (In the meat case, too.) These are good for one person. You cane saute or bake.

    My grocer, and most I suspect, sells fresh hamburgers in the meat case ... already made into patties; you just fry them. Or turkey burgers.

    I always use steamfresh veggies. They are in the freezer case and much healthier than canned veggies. You simply microwave them in the bag. You can get corn, green beans, carrots, potatoes. Really good -- and healthy.

    I hope these super simple ideas help.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Greek Salad

    1/2 cucumber coarsely quartered and chopped
    2-3 tomatoes coarsely chopped
    1/2 red onion cut in half and then thinly sliced
    4oz feta cheese
    Black Olives if you like 'em (blech!)

    Dressing
    2/3c red wine vinegar
    1/3c vegetable oil
    1 tbsp dried oregano
    1 tbsp sugar
    1 tsp black pepper
    Shake up and pour about 1/2 of dressing onto veggies.

    Ta da!

    ReplyDelete
  69. First let me say that we are an amazing group. All Snarky had to say was "I need help..." and look at our response. I love you all.

    Second, @CC how did you know I was looking for an apple crisp recipe?? Yummy!! Will be making that real soon, thank you.

    Third @all I can't wait to try many of these recipes. I don't mind cooking but I hate tons of ingredients and time, so most of these are perfect for me, thank you.

    YUMMY!!!

    ReplyDelete
  70. OK, I'm not much of a cook, either, but this is the first thing I ever made for TH:

    PENNE WITH MUSHROOMS, ITALIAN SAUSAGE, AND BROCCOLI
    (Can be made vegetarian by substituting the appropriate amount of veggie sausage)

    ¼ lb. Italian sausage (if using veggie sausage, pre-cook)
    1 10-oz package fresh button mushrooms, cleaned and sliced
    1 clove of garlic, minced
    4 cups cooked broccoli florets (about 1 medium head)
    4 cups cooked, drained penne pasta (10 oz dried)
    ¾ cup reduced-sodium vegetable broth
    1 TB fresh lemon juice
    crushed red pepper flakes, to taste
    ¼ cup parmesan cheese

    Crumble the sausage into a large nonstick skillet and cook over medium high heat until golden brown. Remove the sausage with a slotted spoon and drain on a paper towel-lined heat-proof plate. Discard any oils in skillet. Add the mushrooms and cook until golden brown and all juices have evaporated, about 10 minutes.

    Add the garlic and cook, stirring until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Add the broccoli and the drained sausage; cook until warmed through. Stir in the cooked penne, broth, lemon juice and crushed red peppers, if using; cook until just heated through. Serve sprinkled with cheese.

    (Serves 4)

    It's delicious and way easy. Also, it seems fancy. :) The best of both worlds. I have a good recipe for mac and cheese, too, but am short on time. BBL to share more. Oh! I just thought of another good one. Def BBL.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Oooohhhhhhhh, I could give you all my secret Spag Bol recipe, but then I'd have to kill you all :-( And I don't want to do that, cuz you're my BFFs (online version, of course).

    @STY, looks to me like you've got tons of responses, so I won't add any more at this point - being from the UK, all of the recipes I have would have the wrong measurements etc. I tend to stick to a tried and tested repertoire of recipes, all of which are in my head, but if you get really stuck for a simple fish recipe using frozen fish portions (usually cod or coley), then let me know!

    And you know what? This is YOUR blog, (shared with JJ and LKW of course), so you can do WHAT THE HELL YOU LIKE with it!!!!

    Do you see us running?

    I thought not.

    {{Hugs}}

    CC x

    ReplyDelete
  72. Hamburgers are easy... especially if you get the patties that are already shaped.

    Here's a good Teriyaki Salmon
    3/4c soy sauce
    splash of wine (optional)
    1 tsp fresh grated ginger root (you can skip it or get it jarred if this is too much)
    1 tblsp chapped garlic
    1 tbsp sugar
    1 lb salmon

    Put all ingredients (except fish) in a zip lock and squish it up. Add fish. Put in fridge for 2-4 hours. Remove from plastic, place in foil covered pan. Bake 350d for 15 minutes (or until done). Let sit covered for a few minutes.

    They sell pre-put together slow cook bags at the store. I've never tried them, but they have to be easy.

    Does he have a Trader Joes in the area? They have a TON of good, prepared, boxed and frozen food.

    ReplyDelete
  73. It's obvious we need a Twitarded cookbook. Who knew? It will go great with my Twitarded apron that I wear daily. I'm sure the first 2/3 of it will be drink recipes, and then the remaining 1/3 will be these awesome recipes ;)

    ReplyDelete
  74. @ZAnyMouse - next fandom gives back maybe?

    ReplyDelete
  75. I'm a giant fail in the kitchen and I lived off of this when I was single.

    Take bonless chick brest chop up into bite size pieces.

    Green Giant Broccoli & Cauliflower in Cheese Sauce.

    Cook up Chicken
    Cook Green Giant Broccoli & Cauliflower in Cheese Sauce as per instructions.

    Dump veggies and sauce into pan with chicken add a little water or milk to make up sauce.

    Serve...

    Wanna get fancy add some marinated artichoke hearts

    ReplyDelete
  76. Awesome recipes, I think I stole most of not all!

    ReplyDelete
  77. @ Z any Mouse - we were just talking about needing a Twitarded Cookbook when we are at forks. And FGB would be a great reason.

    Don't forget Brownie Stew: brown hamburger. Drain. Toss in a couple cans of vegetable soup and heat. 1 pot cleanup advantage.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Yet another meatloaf for Daddy-O, for variety. Tastes just as good, or better, reheated. I used to make this for my father (when I fly west to visit him in Phoenix (gawd) on my summer vacations) and he always looked very happy.

    Preheat the oven to about 350-375

    PUT 1 and 1/2 lbs medium-fat ground beef in a bowl.
    (By medium I mean that you want some fat for taste, because very lean will make the loaf dry and dense, so sometimes I get two kinds of ground beef. or you can use half ground lamb.)

    DROP all of the following into the bowl (without mixing anything yet!! Don't mix now!!)

    1. a chopped onion, as big or small as you like, and a chopped green pepper if you want.

    2. 1 egg

    3. A tablespoon of mustard. Grey Poupon is super, but your choice.

    4. A teaspoon or more of Worchester sauce and some pepper and maybe a little bit of salt (more than a little will just make the meat shrink so best to wait til it's on the plate to really load up if you like.)

    NOW mix with your hands, to somewhat distribute the ingredients through the meat, BUT using as few moves and as little mixing time as you possibly can, because you don't want to pack and squeeze the meat a lot or it will get dense like a pound cake, ick.)

    PUT the gooey ball 'o meat into a metal baking pan or some such for the oven (foil-lined to save on clean-up effort).
    And SHAPE IT, again with as few strokes as possible, into a shape like a fat domino.

    POUR half a can, or whatever it takes to cover the loaf, of plain tomato sauce over the top (save the rest for halfway through the cooking, or when the first batch looks dried or has slipped off. You can also spoon pan juices over the loaf, then the last tomato sauce)

    PUT in the oven. Cooking time for the whole loaf may be 60 minutes. I tend to check even earlier and cut off the ends which cook first, and then if you like you can let it cook longer. I tend to wait and let cook a tiny bit more the following nights. This may not be 100% safe unless you are willing to pop the leftover loaf into the icebox fairly soon after your meal. But that's how I do it.

    ReplyDelete
  79. wow! ask and ye shall receive! lots of great receipes.

    Tagged onto @anonmyous comments about prepared foods - we do some of that here, hit and miss for taste. In frozen foods, are the prepared pasta w/shrimp, chicken, etc.Not bad, especially if Dad is too tired to cook.

    My boys LOVE the precooked pulled pork (Hormel or Dinosaur Grill). Not frozen. In our stores it is with the prepared mashed potatoes. Which, BTW are delicious. Who knew you don't have to peel potatoes anymore?

    How are y'all printing these recipes? cutting and pasting to Word?

    A Twitarded Cookbook for FGB is a great idea. I will help you.

    ReplyDelete
  80. I am WAY tied up with family stuff this weekend but I just had to take a minute to say how fm i love you guys!!! you blow me away every time. for reals.

    going off to prep for the in-law invasion tomorrow with a warm & fuzzy feeling...

    xo

    ReplyDelete
  81. My husband and I have the simplest recipe for goulash :) We basically mix together hamburger, elbow macaroni, and homeade canned tomatoes. The amount of each ingredient depends on how much you want to make. We use a whole pound of hamburger, whole box of macaroni and two quarts of tomatoes. But cooking for one person may only call for half of each, unless you want leftovers. Also, if homeade canned tomatoes are not an option then the store baught stewed tomatoes work well too :) Hope this helps. Its an easy one to remember with only 3 ingredients.

    ReplyDelete
  82. @cullenary curser - You are a cookin machine, I bow down to the awesomeness that is your recipes and your clevage!

    @STY - I just want to say that I think the community that you all have built here is awesome and I'm glad that we can offer you and your family support in this small way. I emailed you a few recipes the other night, but thought of one more thats pretty simple too.

    Chicken with Brocolli - this saucy chicken dish is served over white rice (any type will do)

    2 boneless skinless chicken boobs (after reading this in @LindayRae's comment above I will never call them breasts again!)cut into 1 inch cubes
    1 can each cream of chicken & cream of brocolli soup (campbells condensed)
    3/4 cup mayo (NOT miracle whip)
    3 Tbsp. lemon juice
    1 Tbsp. yellow Curry powder
    1 bag frozen brocolli florets (thawed)
    Shredded cheddar cheese (garnish - I know it sounds weird, but trust me its delicious!)


    1. Combine mayo, cream of chicken, cream of broccoli, lemon juice, & curry in bowl.
    2. brown chicken in the biggest skillet/saute pan you can find.
    3. Once chicken in browned, add sauce and thawed broccoli florets and heat thoroughly.
    4. Spoon over rice and sprinkle cheddar cheese on top.

    Okay, so thats all I've got. I hope that you like it.

    BTW - verification word "pulight" - ummmm....do they know this is the Twitarded blog....cause we don't do "pulight": crass, dirty, obnoxious... absofuckinlutely, but never "pulight".

    ReplyDelete
  83. I thought of something else your dad might like. It's not really a recipe, but it's super easy. Sometimes, if I don't really feel like "cooking", I'll just heat up a a baked potato. Then, I also put a bag of Green Giant broccoli and cheese sauce into the microwave and warm that up. Put that on top of the baked potato and you have a very filling meal!

    ReplyDelete
  84. I'm a HUGE fan of crock pot cooking. They now sell special packets of crock pot seasonings in the spice isle of the grocery store and they're AWESOME! My fav is beef stew. Easy peasy.

    3 lbs stew beef
    2 large fat carrotts
    5 gold yukon potatoes, cubed (not peeled)
    1/2 cup chopped celery
    2 small yellow onions, cut as you like
    seasoning packet, and water as directed (2 cups I think)

    Put water in bottom of crock pot while you have meat browning in a small amount of veg oil in a pan. Beef must be browned before putting in the crock pot! I like to add a bit of garlic and some extra spices to the meat while it's browning for added flavor, but this is optional.

    Add spice packet for beef stew and whisk into water until blended. Add veggies, then add meat and everything else in the pan (especially the juice!). I like to toss some Mrs. Dash on the top but you can leave it as is. Cover and put crock pot on low setting for 7 hours. No need to stir.

    Yum! I serve this about once a week, it's always a hit. Not fancy but really yummy!!

    ReplyDelete
  85. Here's one that's quick, easy and really hard to mess up.

    Easy Potato Soup

    4 cups cubed potatoes
    1 cup coursely chopped celery
    1 cup cousely chopped onion
    1 tsp salt
    2 cups water

    Put in medium pot and boil for 20 minutes. When veggies are soft slightly mash with potato masher (or fork if you don't have one).

    Add 1 cup evaporated milk, 1 tbsp dried parsley, 3 tbsp butter and 1/8 tsp pepper. Heat through.

    ReplyDelete
  86. Hi Snark! Here's an amazing, 20 minute, few-ingredient, impressive pork tenderloin meal. :)

    Feeds 8- you can easily half or double it.

    Ingredients

    4 1/2 pounds pork tenderloins, 2 packages with 2 tenderloins in each package
    4 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
    4 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
    8 cloves garlic, cracked
    Steak seasoning blend or coarse salt and black pepper
    4 sprigs fresh rosemary leaves stripped and finely chopped
    4 sprigs fresh thyme, leaves stripped and finely chopped
    Directions
    Preheat oven to 500 degrees F.

    Trim silver skin or connective tissue off tenderloins with a very sharp thin knife.

    Place tender loins on a nonstick cookie sheet with a rim. Coat tenderloins in a few tablespoons of balsamic vinegar, rubbing vinegar into meat. Drizzle tenderloins with extra-virgin olive oil, just enough to coat. Cut small slits into meat and disperse chunks of cracked garlic cloves into meat. Combine steak seasoning blend or coarse salt and pepper with rosemary and thyme and rub meat with blend. Roast in hot oven 20 minutes.

    Let meat rest, transfer to a carving board, slice and serve.

    ReplyDelete
  87. Hi STY,

    Easy, delicious MEATLOAF!

    1 lb ground beef
    1 lb ground turkey
    1 cup breadcrumbs
    2 beaten eggs
    1 large onion, chopped
    1/2 tsp. salt
    1/2 tsp. pepper
    1 cup ketchup
    1 1/2 TBL. Worcestershire sauce

    Mix together breadcrumbs, egg, onion, salt and pepper. Add to ground beef and mix well (with your fingers!). Shape into a loaf on a baking sheet. Mix ketchup with Worcestershire sauce and pour over the top. Place strips of bacon on top to cover the top of the meatloaf. Bake at 350 degrees for 70-80 minutes. This makes a big loaf so can halve the recipe or cut it up with cool and freeze.

    I plop the meat on the baking sheet, make a well in the middle and mix it all up right on the pan, then shape it - less cleanup!

    This recipe comes from the Lorna Barrett Booktown mysteries and is my favorite. The bacon on top is my addition, so can be made without.

    ReplyDelete
  88. I would be first in line to buy a Twitarded cookbook, and FGB is a great idea! Does anyone have a recipe for how to make RPattz fall in love with me?

    ReplyDelete
  89. As usual, I'm so fucking floored at the responses here.

    And, not sure if y'all know it -- but I can't cook for shit. Seriously.

    Which is why I'm trying to convince ML to copy down all these recipes for me. Instead, he's just staring at me like an asshole and muttering something about me "doing it myself".

    ReplyDelete
  90. Very simple for a crock pot. Even easier if you get those liners so it's a no mess clean up!

    Bone in or boneless pork chops.
    1 can Chicken rice soup

    Put in crock pot for at least 4 hours. (8 hours it gets a little dry, but still ok) And it's done!
    You can add some diced potatoes, or carrots and some extras. I am sure you can fancy it up more but for something super quick, cheap and feels like a meal this is great! You can even use those pork chops that don't look as pretty. ha ha.

    ReplyDelete
  91. I think this is a great post STY! I'm going to make a lot of these dinners for my family. The only meal my father ever cooked was liver and onions when my mom had to work on the weekend. NASTY! It stunk up the whole house! After my mom passed he ate out a lot or ate out of a can.

    I can't extol enough about the rotisserie chicken that comes already prepared and hot at the grocery store. I use the leftovers to make chicken salad, chicken noodle soup and chicken pot pie.

    Easy Chicken Noodle Soup
    (Recipe comes from the Better than Bouillon label)

    6 T Better than Bouillon chicken base
    2.5 quarts water
    3 - 10 oz packages frozen mixed vegetables
    3 C precooked cut up chicken
    6 oz dry egg noodles

    Dissolve bouillon base in water in a soup pot. Add the frozen vegetables, chicken, and noodles. Bring to a boil and simmer 10 minutes. I like to add a teaspoon of poultry seasoning as well.

    **********

    Chicken Pot Pie

    2 C precooked cut up chicken
    1 C sliced carrots
    1 C frozen peas
    1/2 C sliced celery
    1/3 C butter
    1/3 C chopped onion
    1/3 C flour
    1/2 t salt
    1/4 t black pepper
    1/4 t celery seed
    1 3/4 C chicken broth
    2/3 C milk
    1 pkg unbaked pie crusts

    Preheat oven to 425 degrees. In a saucepan combine chicken, carrots, peas, and celery. Add water to cover and and boil for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, drain, and set aside. In a saucepan over medium heat, cook onions in butter until soft and translucent. Stir in flour, salt, pepper, and celery seed. Slowly stir in chicken broth and milk. Simmer over medium-low heat until thick. Remove from heat and set aside. Place 1 unbaked pie crust in bottom of pie plate and place the chicken and vegetable mixture over the bottom crust. Pour hot liquid mixture over chicken and vegetables. Cover with top crust, seal edges, and make several small slits in the top crust to allow steam to escape. Bake in preheated oven for 30-35 minutes or until pastry is golden brown. Cool for 10 minutes before serving.

    ReplyDelete
  92. In the south we have a company called Schwan's that delivers frozen home cooked meals. Just place your weekly/monthly order & the truck comes to you. In Georgia, you won't have to worry about bears cornering the Schwan's man like they have been known to do in the mountains.

    What about Rotisserie chicken you can get in most grocery stores, just add a box of stuffing.

    My hubby likes Hobo Stew. Start with a hamburger patty, put it in foil with sliced onions, potatoes & carrots. Make sure to add salt n pepper. Then seal up the foil and cook in oven or grill until veggies are soft.

    ReplyDelete
  93. Ya know...maybe instead of the FGB (not that it's not a good cause) we could do a big arse donation to the Heart and Stroke Foundation? I mean the next FGB is going to be a loooonnnnggggg time away. Thoughts?

    ReplyDelete
  94. I'm a pretty pathetic and boring cook, but have managed to feed a family of six for the last 12 or so years...just! These recipes are from the ‘4 ingredients’ cookbooks. They’re best sellers here and were created by two time poor Aussie mums - http://www.4ingredients.com.au/index.htm Anyway, I thought it best to start Daddy STY off with easy things to make and maybe a chocolate cake for later on when he feels ready!FYI, this site is also great for recipes www.taste.com.au
    Goodluck and enjoy!!!

    Macaroni bake
    Ingredients (serves 4)
    •2 cups cooked macaroni pasta
    •420g can tomato soup
    •250g diced ham
    •1 cup grated tasty cheese

    Method
    1.Preheat oven to 200°C/180°C fan-forced. Lightly grease a 5cm-deep, 28cm x 19.5cm (base) ovenproof dish.
    2.Place pasta, soup and ham in a large bowl. Stir to combine. Transfer mixture to prepared dish. Sprinkle with cheese. Bake for 20 minutes or until cheese is melted. Stand for 5 minutes. Serve.

    Thai pumpkin soup
    Ingredients (serves 4)
    •1kg butternut pumpkin, peeled, cut into 1.5cm pieces
    •2 tablespoons red curry paste
    •270ml can coconut cream
    •1/4 cup roughly chopped fresh coriander leaves

    Method
    1.Heat a large saucepan over medium heat. Add pumpkin and curry paste. Cook, stirring, for 1 to 2 minutes or until mixture starts to stick to bottom of pan. Add coconut cream. Cook, stirring, for 1 minute.
    2.Add 2 cups cold water. Bring to the boil. Reduce heat to low. Simmer, covered, for 20 minutes or until pumpkin has softened. Set aside for 5 minutes.
    3.Blend or process soup in batches until smooth. Season with salt and pepper. Top with coriander. Serve.

    Flourless chocolate cake
    Ingredients (serves 8)
    •200g butter, chopped
    •250g dark chocolate, chopped
    •4 eggs, separated
    •1 cup caster sugar

    Method
    1.Preheat oven to 160°C/140°C fan-forced. Grease a 6cm-deep, 22cm (base) round spring form cake pan. Line base and side with baking paper.
    2.Place butter and chocolate in a heatproof bowl over a pan of simmering water (make sure bowl doesn't touch water). Stir over low heat until smooth.
    3.Using an electric mixer, beat egg yolks and 1/2 cup sugar for 5 minutes or until thick and creamy. Beat eggwhites in a separate bowl until soft peaks form. Gradually beat in remaining sugar until dissolved.
    4.Add chocolate mixture to egg yolk mixture. Mix to combine. Add one-quarter of the eggwhite mixture. Mix well. Fold in remaining eggwhite mixture. Pour into prepared pan. Bake for 50 minutes or until top is firm to touch and a skewer inserted into centre has moist crumbs clinging. Cool cake in pan. Serve.

    ReplyDelete
  95. Sign me up for the cookbook...how about the money going to help save the Forks High School facade. They are trying to raise money to save it from total distuction. Glad I got to see it on the Foooooooooooooooooooorks adventure!

    ReplyDelete
  96. I just recently had a friend tell me about an even easier way to do lasagne - get the large raviolis and layer them with sauce in baking dish. The raviolis already have the cheese and stuff in them, so it's a piece of cake! (Just make sure to start with sauce first, otherwise I'm sure the raviolis would stick to the bottom of the pan.)

    I certainly know what you mean about needing "easy" food ideas. After my grandmother died, my grandfather managed to mess up Jello. How, you might ask? He put it in the freezer instead of the fridge. Apparently, teaching him how to use the washing machine was an interesting task as well.

    Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  97. FROM MY MOTHER TO YOU!! THESE ARE SOOOOOO INCREDIBLY EASY! MUCH LOVE!

    SANDY’S CHICKEN ENCHILADAS
    1 CAN MEDIUM RED ENCHILADA SAUCE
    1 CAN GREEN ENCHILDADA SAUCE
    1 CAN ROTEL DICED TOMATO W/ GREEN CHILE
    1 CAN ZESTY REFRIED BEANS
    1 PKG CORN TORTILLAS (NOT CHIPS)
    1 JAR MEXICAN LA CREMA FROM DAIRY SECTION (OPTIONAL, BUT YUMMY)
    ½ ONION DICED
    1 BUNCH CILANTRO/CHOPPED
    2 COOKED CHICKEN BREASTS or 2 CANS COSTCO KIRKLAND LABEL CHICKEN
    2 CUPS SHREDDED CHEESE

    POUR A SMALL AMOUNT OF RED SAUCE INTO BOTTON OF 9X13 CASSEROLE DISH. PUT IN 1 LAYER OF OVERLAPPING TORTILLAS TO COVER DISH BOTTOM (CAN OVERLAP A LOT). SPREAD THE CAN OF REFRIED BEANS, THEN SPREAD EVENLY THE DICED ONION, DICED TOMATOES, CHICKEN, ½ OF THE CILANTRO, 1/2 OF THE CHEESE, ½ OF THE GREEN ENCHILADA SAUCE, AND ALL OF THE MEXICAN CRÈME. COVER WITH ANOTHER OVERLAPPING LAYER OF CORN TORTILLAS, AND THEN TOP WITH THE REMAINING SAUCE, CHEESE, AND CILATRO. PUT ON A COOKIE SHEET AND BAKE @ 375 DEGREES FOR 45 MINUTES OR UNTIL CASSEROLE BUBBLES IN THE CENTER.

    ReplyDelete
  98. SLOOOOW COOKER!

    I have two kids and work full-time, so it's my BFF!

    PORK TENDERLOIN:
    Poke holes and stuff chunks of fresh garlic in it -- cover it in any brand of "complete seasoning", add a little water and cook on low for 8 hours. Serve with "just add water" instant potatoes and some veggies. Best meal ever!

    BEEF ROAST:
    Any cut of decent meat, dump a can of seasoned, diced tomatoes, some sliced yellow onion and salt/pepper and cook on low for 5-6 hours. Ditto instant mashies and veggies. YUM!!!

    ReplyDelete
  99. We just started using e-mealz.com

    It sends you a week worth of recipes and the accompanying grocery list for $5/mo. We got the vegetarian plan (which is for 4-6 people and we are only 2 - but now we have lunch leftovers). It's not always the healthiest, so I make some adjustments, but they are super easy recipes and a lot of variety!

    There are a lot of different types of meal plans... I'm not sure we'll stick with it after the obligatory 3 months, but only because then I'll have 12 weeks worth of recipes to rotate in.

    After my mom passed away, I assumed I would be doing all the cooking when I moved in with my dad for a bit... I cooked dinner twice over a 3 month period. Apparently my parents had just split the tasks, but my dad actually knew his way around the kitchen. Changed my world view even more than it had already been altered by her passing.

    I call my dad for her recipes... I'm sure my sisters and I will be fighting for the cookbooks someday...

    *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  100. Ok... here's an actualy "recipe" since my last post was just whatever... However, I use the word recipe very loosely since I myself don't really like to cook...

    My version of shepherd's pie (or just call it a casserole)

    Using a round or square casserole dish...

    - Start with one layer consisting of one-pound browned ground beef
    - Add a layer of frozen or canned corn
    - Add another layer of cream of mushroom soup
    - Add a layer of already cooked instant mashed potatoes (or leftover mashed potatoes)
    - Cover the whole thing with cheese

    Bake for 30-35 mins until the cheese is melted.

    YUM!

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  101. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  102. And this is my fav corn caserole in the whole world!

    http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paula-deen/corn-casserole-recipe/index.html

    Ingredients

    * 1 (15 1/4-ounce) can whole kernel corn, drained
    * 1 (14 3/4-ounce) can cream-style corn
    * 1 (8-ounce) package corn muffin mix (recommended: Jiffy)
    * 1 cup sour cream
    * 1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted
    * 1 to 1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar

    Directions

    Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

    In a large bowl, stir together the 2 cans of corn, corn muffin mix, sour cream, and melted butter. Pour into a greased 9 by 13-inch casserole dish. Bake for 45 minutes, or until golden brown. Remove from oven and top with Cheddar. Return to oven for 5 to 10 minutes, or until cheese is melted. Let stand for at least 5 minutes and then serve warm.

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  103. Not sure if they have been done yet, but here are my faves:

    Side:
    Asparagus. Toss in olive oil, salt and pepper and bake at 350 (I never pay attention to how long, which is terrible I know, but just watch it, I like to move it around so it bakes evenly, I'd say about 20 minutes)

    Meatloaf!!!
    Ingredients:

    1 package Lipton Onion Soup Mix
    2 pounds lean ground beef
    1 large egg
    2/3 cup milk
    3 Tablespoons catsup
    3 Tablespoons brown sugar
    1 Tablespoon yellow mustard

    Directions:

    1. Preheat the oven to 350F.

    2. Mix the onion soup mix, ground beef, egg and milk together.

    3. Form the combination into a well packed loaf shape in a 13 X 9 X 2 loaf pan.

    4. Combine the rest of the ingredients and spoon onto the top of the meatloaf.

    5. Bake uncovered, for about an hour. When done, take the meatloaf out of the pan and place on a serving plate. Let stand for 10 minutes before slicing.

    (This is not homemade, I found it on a website because I like to do lipton soup meatloaf and this is my fave. You might have to add some bread crumbs because I find it to be too wet, and also the sauce is fucking amazing so you might want to double it!)

    Shepards Pie

    1 pound ground beef
    1 small onion, diced
    1 envelope dry onion soup mix
    1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
    salt / pepper
    2/3 cup of water
    1 can corn or mixed vegetables (I use frozen corn and carrots mixture)
    Approx 4 cups mashed potatoes

    Brown ground beef and onion. Drain fat. Add onion soup mix, garlic powder, salt, pepper and water. Place beef mixture in an un- greased 9x12 baking pan. Open can of vegetables. Spread vegetables over beef mixture.
    Gently, yet confidently, spread mashed potatoes over vegetables. Dot top of potatoes with butter or margarine, if desired. Sprinkle with paprika! Bake, covered, at 350* for 45 minutes. Remove cover and cook an additional 15 minutes, allowing potatoes to brown.

    (This is the closest recipe to what I usually follow, I wing it usually, I also like to have a dash of Worcestershire sauce)

    Good luck. I can't really think of much else, these are my homestyle recipes that remind me of my mom because she taught me to make these foods (even though I don't follow her recipes)

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  104. I made @Toefunny's Swedish meatball recipe tonight. Sooooooo good! And a huge hit with my husband! Thanks ladies!

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  105. Super Easy Italian Beef

    ~He'll have plenty of leftovers to freeze & break out when he needs it. It's a freezer staple around here.

    1 3-4lb beef chuck roast
    1 jar (12oz) peperoncini
    1 can (14.5 oz) beef broth
    1 can (12 oz) beer
    1 pkg (1 oz) Italian salad dressing mix

    Put roast in slow cooker. Add peperoncini (drain & pull off stems) broth, beer & salad dressing mix; do not stir.

    Cook on low 8 hours

    Remove meat; shred with to FOOOORKS (it usually just falls apart). return meat to slow cooker; mix well.

    Serve on Italian / French bread with provolone. YUMMAY!

    Sty, what a thoughtful daughter you are <3

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  106. I've used this recipe a few times, and it always comes out wonderfully.
    (a slow cooker needed, must try!)


    The Ingredients
    1 package of beef short ribs
    --1 cup soy sauce
    --1 cup brown sugar
    --5 whole jalapeno peppers (I use 5, but use what you want)
    --1/2 cup water


    The Directions.
    Plopped frozen solid beef ribs into the crockpot. I didn't even think of browning them

    I then put the soy sauce, water and brown sugar on top, and threw in the WHOLE (don't cut them!) jalapenos on top.


    Since my ribs were frozen, I cooked them on high for an hour, then used a wooden spoon to smash them down further into the crock. Then I cooked on low for another 8 hours.


    If you are out of the house all day, cook on low. When you get home, turn the ribs over so the other side gets fully saturated with the most-awesome-liquid-ever while you change clothes and set the table.

    We served this with brown rice and green beans.

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  107. I just made this today. Total comfort food.

    Beef with Beer and onions

    Peel 4 onions. Cut in half lengthwise; slice thinly crosswise.

    Trim 2-3 lbs of inside round roast of fat and cut into 1 inch cubes.

    Chop 4-5 slices of bacon.

    Sprinkle 1/4-1/3c of flour over the beef until all beef is entirely covered.

    In a large skillet heat 1-2 tbsp of vegetable oil on high heat. Brown beef in batches adding more oil if you need too. Once a batch of beef is done put into bottome of slow cooker.

    Turn down the frying pan a bit and fry bacon until just starting to crisp. Add onions and the following spices: 1 tsp dried thyme, 1/2 tsp of dried basil, oregano and sage. Cook, stirring, until onions are softened, about 8 minutes. Scrape into slow cooker.

    Now take 1 12oz bottle of lager. Get the good stuff and pour it into the frying pan being sure to scrape all the awesomeness of the brown bits at the bottom of the pan. Bring the beer to boil and then toss in a tbsp of dijon mustard. Throw that into the slow cooker. Toss in a bay leaf for fun too.

    Cook on low until beef is tender 6-7 hours. Remove bay leaf, and thicken with cornstarch/water if needed.

    and for the love of all things holy serve over mashed potatoes or polenta.

    ReplyDelete
  108. Swedish Meatballs


    Frozen Cooked Meatballs, thawed in microwave
    1 Envelope Lipton's Onion and Mushroom Soup Mix
    2 Tablespoons Flour
    2 Cups Water
    1/2 to 3/4 Cup Sour Cream, to taste
    1/4 to 1/2 Cup Milk, to desired consistency
    1 small or large can Mushrooms, stems and pieces, drained
    Ground Pepper to taste
    Cooked Egg Noodles, or pasta of choice

    Combine soup mix and flour in large saucepan, add water and bring to a boil. Stir constantly until thickened(just a minute or two). Remove from heat, add sour cream and milk until desired consistency. Add mushrooms and meatballs. Add pepper or other seasonings. Use low heat if it needs warmed further. Serve over noodles.

    I made this last night and it was pretty tasty. The hardest part was waiting for the noodles to cook.

    ReplyDelete
  109. The only thing I make from scratch that's NOT breakfast or dessert is Tuna Salad...everything else is a frozen caserole type thing or frozen bag type thing.

    Tuna Salad
    1 large can Tuna in water
    4 boiled eggs
    4 sweet pickles (any pickle will do...I like sweet)
    4 heaping spoons of mayonaise

    Pour the water out of the tuna can, then flake the tuna into a medium sized bowl using a fork. Dice/chop (whatever) up the eggs and pickles, add them to the tuna. Toss everything around a bit with the aforementioned fork then add the mayo a spoonful at a time (do not use this spoon to mix the salad with cause you may want MORE mayo...I only mention this because early on in my tuna salad days, i ended up using 2 or 3 spoons while mr. fork just sat there feeling dumb). Salt and pepper to taste.

    It's a very flexible recipe. You can go more or less on any one ingredient or add something or exchange it (I do pickles, other's do apples (bleah!)). You can cut up everything really small or make it chunky. The most difficult thing is boiling the eggs, and while I've fucked up the eggs on multiple occasions, it's never once affected the taste (probably due to the horrendous amount of mayo i use). It only keeps for four days, so eat up!

    Oh, and whoever said to just make a list of ideas...that's brilliant. We eat the same 5 things week in week out because I can't think of anything more brilliant than frozen this and frozen that.

    ReplyDelete
  110. I'm in South Carolina and was born and raised just across the river from Savannah. Here is a great easy vegetable soup that your dad won't have any problem finding the ingredients for in the south!

    Vegetable Soup with Turkey Kielbasa

    5 cans stewed tomatoes (any brand)
    2 bags Mackenzie's Frozen Vegetable Gumbo
    1 and 1/2 packages Hillshire farm Turkey Kielbasa (cut into bite sized pieces)
    Salt, Pepper, Italian Seasoning to taste

    Combine all ingredients in Crock Pot (break up the tomatoes with your hand or pour them in first and use a potato masher) and put on low for about 8 hours. You can also cook this in a dutch oven on the stove top in an hour or so, just bring to a boil then turn down to low heat for about an hour and a half, stirring frequently.

    I serve this with french bread or make sweet cornbread from the box (Jiffy Corn Muffin mix - super easy directions on the box)

    You can also substitute the Kielbasa with beef stew meat cut up small and browned in a skillet or even hamburger done the same way. This is a big pot of soup, so you could cut the ingredients in half to make half as much, or leftovers freeze well.

    Hope this recipe helps. It's my husband's favorite and is the easiest thing I make!

    ReplyDelete
  111. ----------

    Baked Chimichangas

    Whatcha need:

    1 medium white or yellow onion
    1 green bell pepper
    1 packet of taco seasoning
    1 pound round steak (or other cheap cut of meat)
    1 small can of tomato sauce
    10 burrito sized tortillas
    1 small can refried beans
    1 cup cheddar cheese, shredded
    2 tablespoons vegetable oil

    Chop up a white onion and one green bell pepper. Put them in a crock pot with a pound of round steak (or whatever cheap meat you got), 1 can of tomato sauce, and one packet of taco seasoning.

    Cook your mixture on high for 6 hour or low on 8 hours. Then shred the meat with tongs when it's done cooking. It should fall apart fairly easily for you.

    Now, preheat your oven to 400 degrees and oil the bottom of a foil lined pan.

    Slather a few tablespoons of refried beans on your tortillas.

    Then add a few healthy pinches of cheddar cheese.

    Top the pile with meat mixture.

    Roll it up like a burrito (after all, a chimichanga is just a deep fried, or in our case baked, burrito).

    Brush on a little bit of vegetable oil. And put it in your preheated oven until they're toasty brown.

    Top those babies with more cheese, salsa, sour cream, guacamole, or whatever else your heart desires.

    -----------

    Simple Potato Soup

    Whatcha Need:
    Potatoes- peeled, chopped, boiled, and strained
    1 Lg. can chicken noodle soup
    1 Lg. can cream of chicken soup
    2 C. milk
    salt, pepper, and garlic powder

    First, boil your chunked up potatoes until they are just a bit past fork tender. Don't let them go very far past fork tender or the starches will develop too much and you'll just have a pot of mash on your hands. These are tender enough that when I stir them they start to fall apart. I like that for a soup consistency.

    Add in your large can of chicken noodle soup. I just use good ol' condensed Campbells. But, you can add in whatever special soup you like right here. Just use the large can.


    Add in your shredded chicken and your large can of cream of chicken soup.


    Salt and pepper and garlic powder that pot of comfort.


    Now, start pouring milk and stirring. Stop pouring when the soup is the consistency that you like.

    It's done! YUM! Now, you can eat as is or you can hook it up with some bacon bits, sour cream, or green onions.

    _________________

    White Chicken Chili

    Whatcha Gonna Be Needin':
    1 lg. white onion, chopped
    1 tsp. vegetable oil
    1 C. shredded chicken
    1 small can green chiles
    1 can medium Rotel
    3 cans Great Northern Beans
    8 oz. monterrey jack cheese, cubed or shredded
    8 oz. pepper jack cheese, cubed or shredded

    Get your onions all chopped and tossed in with some oil in a hot pan. Get those babies translucent.

    Toss your chopped or shredded chicken pieces in here.

    Now mix in your can of green chiles.

    Mix in that can of Rotel. I use mild Rotel but you can use hot, if you feel the need to breathe fire.

    Add a can of white beans (navy).


    Now mix in the milk and add a little salt and pepper. Turn the heat down to about medium low right about here.


    Add in some diced up or shredded cheese.


    Melt your yummy cheese into the pot now. Keep stirring so it breaks up and doesn't burn to the bottom.

    ReplyDelete
  112. Meatloaf:
    1 and 1/2 pounds ground meat (beef, turkey)
    1/2 cup crumbs (cracker, tortilla chips, corn flakes, rice chex - I use my Grandma's hand crank grinder to make them small)
    2 beaten eggs
    1 8-ounce can of tomato SAUCE (not paste)
    1 teaspoon salt (or less)
    Seasoning of choice (I use Italian Seasoning and just sprinkle it over the bowl before mixing)

    Preheat oven to 350'
    Combine all ingredients using the fork you used to beat the eggs (if you used a FFOORRKK - had to do it).
    Put mix in loaf pan.
    Bake in oven for 1 and 1/4 hours.

    I never liked meatloaf until I made it myself now we have it at least once a month :) Enjoy!

    PS This recipe is from my Grandma's Better Homes and Gardens cookbook that has been passed down through the family.

    ReplyDelete
  113. This is really easy - only takes 10 mins in the kitchen (which is how I like to cook!)
    Hoping that all the ingredients are the same in America. I've converted the oven temp to Fahrenheit (And hoped I've got it right)

    Leek and Bacon Pie
    2Tbs of oil
    2 Leeks, pale section only, thinly sliced
    4 rashers of bacon, finely chopped
    2cloves of garlic, crushed
    broccoli, cut into small pieces
    1 cup milk
    1 cup grated cheese
    4 eggs
    (mixed salad and bought garlic bread to serve)

    1. Preheat oven to 355 deg. Lightly grease a 24cm round pie dish.
    2. Heat oil in frying pan, add leek, bacon and garlic. Cook and stir for 4 -5 minutes or until leek has softened.
    3. Bring a medium saucepan of water to the boil over moderate heat. Add broccoli; cook for 2 minutes and drain.
    4. In the pie dish, add the broccoli , top with leek mixture.
    5. Whisk eggs, milk and cheese in a large jug. Season with pepper.
    6. Pour egg mixture of broccoli. Bake for 15 minutes. Reduce oven temperate to 340 degrees and bake for another 15 minutes.
    Remove from oven, stand in the pan for 5 minutes, cut into wedges. Serve with salad and garlic bread.

    ReplyDelete

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