I have actually been genuinely excited about the things we've seen this week from the set of Breaking Dawn! Yeah, I'm totally whoring it up (more on that some other time--FOCUS STY!) and have spent more time than I am willing to admit swooning over Kristen Stewart's dress in that crowd scene. And her ass in that dress in that crowd scene. I mean, I am pretty loyal to my team outside of some mostly-innocent drunken girly smooches here and there, but...daaaaamn - she looks fiiiine in that dress. Just sayin'... I wasn't even all that hopped up over seeing Robert Pattinson stuck into yet another boring button-down shirt. Fine - whatever - I get it: the wardrobe people and probably Stephenie Meyer have total hard-ons for the button-down shirt look. I can deal with it. Dressing guys is hard. It shouldn't be THAT hard if it's your job and you are a highly-compensated stylist, but I digress...
Because tonight, people, they went to far. Crimes against a hot man were committed, and I am not going to be quiet about it despite the fact that people were so excited to see new pics of The Precious that we were willing to overlook the gawd-awful outfit he was sporting.
I don't get it. Fine - finding cool, sexy-vampire-worthy tropical island outfits might have been a little bit of a challenge. I'll grant that. Shit, the pic from earlier this week showing RPatts in his own shorts-and-a-buttond0wn get-up had me a tad miffed, too. But what is UP with the white-on-white wife-beater-and-peddle-pusher-capri get-up that he is wearing here?! JMFHF - he looks embarrassed, and the dudes he is walking past look embarrassed FOR him. It's sad. For everyone. Mostly us.
RPatts: Shit...don't look...don't say anything...fml please just let me be invisible...What is UP with this wardrobe equivalent of saltpeter shit??? Who in their right mind would put him in a white wife-beater AND tapered white...what the fuck are those, tailored jorts?! GAH! Did someone borrow that from a Jersey Shore reject??? Plus the tank is TUCKED IN to his ridiculous capris! He looks like an extra in a Carnival Cruise Lines commercial - "dude who is trying to wear beachwear but can't let go of his button-down" - ugh! I would have rather seen him strutting across the damn beach in a grass hula skirt. Or naked. But I guess that goes without saying...
Other On-Set Dudes: Wait - are we on the set of the right movie? I thought this was supposed to be the sexy honeymoon part...???
RPatts: I wish a cobra would jump out of that ginormous basket that is CLEARLY filled with King Cobras and put me out of my fucking misery... My beach outfits were more masculine in Little Ashes, for fuck's sake.
Have at it in the comments, people! And feel free to tell me if you thing that's just the most perfect outfit EVER. But for my two cents, that outfit is an abomination and I hope someone votes the wardrobe person (and anyone else who had a say here *cough*Stephenie Meyer*cough) off the freaking island STAT.