Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Peter Facinelli Comes to New Jersey, Narrowly Escapes Our Clutches. Again.

Oh nooooes - I almost fell into their evil Garden State trap!!!

A couple of months ago, we heard the good (if not somewhat baffling) news that Peter Facinelli was going to grace our home base of New Jersey with his presence. I made a note of it (and the subsequent date change) then promptly forgot about it until a week or so ago when I started to write a post about it. As I checked out the details, I started getting psyched in that way that only all things Twilight and RPatts-y can get me psyched. You know, that feeling of "OME I haven't felt this excited about anything in forever!" that got most of us hooked on Twilight and RPatts in the first place? Yeah, that's the one...

Not only was he going to be signing autographs and taking pictures with fans to benefit Alex's Lemonade Stand, but he was also promoting a blood drive. And one lucky blood donor would win a VIP meet & greet- AND DINNER!!! - with PFach! All you had to do was enter a contest with a photo via Facebook and then have your picture get the most "likes." People, we had this contest in. the. bag. He It was OURS! For an entire dinner!!! We were there, again: so close, I would taste the sparkle.

Nom nom nom...

Those of you who have been playing along with our silly bloggy games for a long time might remember the time that we came thisclose to winning lunch with Peter Facinelli (aka "The Night of the NYC New Moon Premiere Where We All Almost Stroked Out From Excitement"). But while Twitarded collectively raised and donated about three grand to Alex's Lemonade Stand back then, we ultimately got beat out by someone with deeper pockets. Needless to say, we were uber-excited to have a second chance, especially one which wouldn't require us to ask everyone to open the ol' purse-strings to make it happen. It was perfect!

And then it happened: a near-collision of my real-life - my work life! - and my Twitarded bloggy life - GAH! Trust me when I say that I would go to great lengths to keep this from happening. I mean, I would have totally let JJ bust some kneecaps ala The Sopranos if it had came down to it.

When we first found out that we would be having dinner with PFach (seriously, this contest was such a lock for us), we were ecstatic! Jenny Jerkface spent hours un-tagging Twitarded from all the porny crap that we're connected to on Facebook, and I started plotting the rest of the plans for the day. What would we ask him? What would we ask him to autograph?! How would Jennie Garth feel when he left her to come live some sort of sordid polygamous life with us???

Er, you want me to autograph your WHAT now???

Sadly, the whole plan crumbled mere moments after it had been hatched... As I was looking through the photographs of "the competition" on Facebook, I came across someone I recognized...someone I work with...someone who didn't know anything about the blog and was only vaguely aware - at most - that I maybe had a bit of a thing for Twilight. After 337 frantic phone calls back and forth between JJ and me, I was ready to out myself to this person, tell her sorry that she was going to lose the contest, and hope for the best. I WANTED this dinner. MINE.

But then I started looking at the comments attached to the contest entries... Everyone was being awful and snipey and mean and accusing the people who were winning of cheating (which they may have been, for all I know). And suddenly I realized that this would actually be my very first event where the audience would be largely comprised of Twilight's intended "young adult"/tweener audience. It wasn't going to be pretty. I imagined what would happen if - when! - these mean, snipey little people started tracking us back to the blog via the contest. The mall had already chimed in through their FB something to the effect of "Hey let's keep it clean- we're a family mall!" aaaaand yeah that was pretty much it for us. Things got so ugly that the person I work with actually dropped out of the contest - and she was a contender! But it wasn't meant to be...

I was pissed - we were so close!!! Did I mention that we were SO CLOSE?! fuck fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And then I got over it. It took a good solid week, but I got over it. And we'll still be at Quaker Bridge Mall this Saturday, March 5th, waiting in line to meet to meet Peter Facinelli. Join us if you are free (you can find details HERE)! I'll be the slightly-sulky one in a Twitarded shirt. I'll be trying my best not to have a temper tantrum; otherwise when I get up to the front I'll be bright purple, frothing at the mouth, and screeching "We HAD you!!! You were OURS!!!!" in a way that would make Kathy Bates in "Misery" look like she was just a friendly lass with a little crush who happened to be running a bed & breakfast for authors. I'm still looking forward to it, though. I have $40 for a picture and he'll still be autographing something of mine... What should I bring??? Twilight book? Twitarded tee??? Sparkle peen??? OK I don't own a sparkle peen... Leave your suggestions in the comments - and if you are in the area, let us know if we'll see you there!


Maybe if I wear sunglasses and go incognito they won't recognize me...

30 comments:

  1. OME, jealous! You still get to meet him! Tell him we love him, okay? And please, have him autograph something Twitarded-related, not just Twi-related like all those other unoriginal preteen h00rs and *shudder* Twilight Moms.

    Also, ask him what he's doing the weekend of October 1st. *rubs hands together* Dear Peter, you are cordially invited...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am SO jealous that you get to meet PFach! He seems like a class act from what I have read about him. I can't wait to read about what you twatwaffles actually say to him! Have fun and don't drool!
    :)Jen

    ReplyDelete
  3. Do they actually MAKE sparkle peens? If they do, you should SO bring one. Okay, it's a family mall. Put it in a shoe box lined with fluffy tissue paper and only reveal it to him. It would be a beautiful thing.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bring a copy of Can't Hardly Wait and have him sign it. Mike Dexter FTW!

    Dude, fans can be brutal. Especially the younger generation. I've noticed some people lately getting a little bat shit crazy over Twilight-peeps-and-or-band-members-that-may-have-something to do with-Twilight-not-gonna-name-names. They make up stories, they get all crazed...it's not pretty. Luckily none of these people are in our beautiful group so we don't have to worry about it.

    Hope you meet PFach and definitely tell him about FOOOOOOORKS! Btw, my friend was at his house on Eclipse DVD release weekend for his daughters bday party. She saw his buttcrack. Weird, I know but it's true.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks for loving us and this blog enough not to bring on the wrath of scorned teenaged twihards!! Too bad though, but lucky you can still meet him and get pics and an autograph!
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  6. Good luck Saturday! Before you go in, do you have your helmet, billy club, & flack jacket? Wait. That might actually work! You may be mistaken for some kind of security bitch . . . and allowed/invited to get closer!

    Hey. It's a viable plan B!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You know, you forget how mean teenagers are. No, actually I don't. And girl teenagers are the WORST! Guys are like 'whatevs', but the girls are like 'WTF?!?! Get out of my face/way/guy/car". I really don't understand that. I was one, but I still don't understand it...

    Enjoy the daddysparklepeen!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am sooo excited, I will be there as well, is it Saturday yet??

    ReplyDelete
  9. LMAO - Get the Facinelli Frillies off Red Bella and make him sign them ;o).

    I'm still pissed off that you missed out on the NM dinner, you so deserved that *sigh*.

    xx

    ReplyDelete
  10. We were sooooooo close to winning that dinner!! Damn it!

    I'm already practicing the various constipated-y facial expressions that I know I'm going make whether I want to or not when I get my picture taken. So excited!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. WHOHOO! Yet another 1 degree of separation from RPattz! I need to ditch my family and start stalking...errr, going to public appearances more!:)

    I agree with @My After Car about bringing something "Twitarded" related vs just "twi" related - just to prove your not one of "those" nutjobs!

    Good luck ladies - give Papa Cullen a big squeeze from all of us!

    ReplyDelete
  12. He must sign something twitarded, see if he will sign a few things....then you will have prizes for FFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRSSSSSSS.

    Oh, and....you must invite him (and Billy and......er, Rob) to the event so he(they) can hang out and have drinks (play twister...) with us.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sorry about the failed dinner. But take your Twitarded Banner for him to sign. Uh?

    ReplyDelete
  14. You should have him sign a Twitarded t-shirt & then just keep adding more of the 'Twilight' cast signatures as you get them. :-) That would be pretty sweet.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Yay, I'm so glad you're going to meet Peter!!!!!!! I know he will love you guys and I can't wait to hear all about it. Pass him a note or a secret message to give to me at the Twi convention on Sunday ;)

    ReplyDelete
  16. This is the conversation that is currently going on between me and STY. You know, just the typical stuff friends do when they are preparing to meet a celebrity...

    (Read from bottom up - I'm too lazy to fix it.)

    To: JJ
    From: STY

    I could wheel you in there like Hannibal Lechter… Would make the wait more interesting, anyway. And people would give us a wide birth, so it would be instant crowd-control. It’s be like we sprayed “TweenAway!” all over ourselves.

    From: JJ
    To: STY

    That would make for an awesome picture with Pfach… Just sayin’.

    From: STY
    To: JJ

    I’m bringing a ball gag and some sort of restraint system, just in case.

    From:JJ
    To: STY

    That’s okay. I’m really patient and mellow when I stand in line with a bunch of teenage girls for hours on end. It shouldn’t be a problem…

    From:STY
    To: JJ

    Not that many people – like maybe 20 or so (which is why I am so ticked that we couldn’t swoop in and win it with our bloggy might - lol).

    That said, I know that word is out because people keep telling me about it .

    From: JJ
    To: STY

    I am not happy about getting up early on Saturday, lol. But I’ll take one for the team. I’m hoping it won’t be mobbed. How many people were participating in that Facebook thing? That should give us a sense of what we’re up against.

    From: STY
    To: JJ

    I hope that it isn’t mobbed - lol! we can figure out the details tonight or tomorrow night but I suppose we should plan on getting there early (early0ish) and waiting in line for a good chunk of the day. Blerg.

    From: jj
    To: STY

    Great post, dude. Bouncy bouncy bouncy… we’re going to see PFach!!

    ReplyDelete
  17. "wide birth" - lmfao! that''s a good one...

    and @BrandiJo1217 - i'm not sure that letting pfach know that not only are we twilight fans but we are SUCH big fans that we started our own dirrrty grown-up blog about is is really going to do much to vouch for our sanity - lol!

    all of my twitarded gear is black (mostly because i am too much of a slob and too clumsy to own a white t-shirt for more than six hours without ruining it) but i'll see what i can find!

    : )

    ReplyDelete
  18. Bring the panties!!!!!! **Ducks and runs**

    ReplyDelete
  19. My 11 yr old and I met him at a similar mall eventlast summer. Prepare youself ladies, he is more than dazzling close up!! He was funny, charming and kissed me on the cheek before our picture. (my official $40 photo has is pretty funny due to my clear shock and delight after this kiss!) He was so careful that everyone got a great pic, even gently tucking my daughters hair behind her ear for the photo. I have many great memories of chatting with him an we stood for hours just watching him sign and smile. One of my best days ever. And I was appropriate with him, which was a miracle!!

    SparkleMindy

    ReplyDelete
  20. Hi there ladies! I also attended one of these mall events and YES, he is EVEN MORE HANDSOME in person!! Many of the pics don't do him justice!!
    Strangely enough there were NOT throngs of screaming tweens there. Many were moms with daughters but many were ladies from 20 to 50 yrs old! (*cough-40 here*) So fear less about the anticipated thrashing! Also, take extra cash cause the PHOTO is $40 but to add an autograph it's $20 more! There were 2 lines-one for auto.'s only and one for auto. AND picture. We got so close that our pics of him were enough and the line for auto.'s was SO MUCH shorter, that we ditched the photo. You wait in line to pay and then split into the 2 seperate lines. You have to write on a paper what you want him sign on your item. **Take your black shirts, just buy a SILVER SHARPIE!!!** It shows up great! I bought a Carlisle shirt on eBay just for him to sign and its black!They also had many sharpies there with him. You stand right there by him while he signs--RIGHT fucking THERE!! Oh and the autograph only line went FIRST to the stage-may wanna consider it. But after the signing you line up for the picture with him. Oh and there were LOTS of vendors with Twi-merchandise, some on clearance so have even MORE cash ready!!
    Have fun, girls!! I was sure swooning like crazy!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. @lila - YES!!! there is a company (Tantus, if I recall) that makes "The Vamp" - you can put it in the freezer and everything - lol! OK that's weird even by my standards, but yup they make it... : )

    @lisajsienna - he's definitely much more handsome in person - when we saw him and cullen at the NM premiere we attended, we were pretty blown away! probably would have passed out if rpatts would have walked in (along with the rest of the theater). i have a silver sharpie and was considering it, so thanks for the thumps-up there! can't WAIT!!

    @anon - we're prepared!! as prepared as we can be - lol... and i know i am going to be a mess for the pic - i take TERRIBLE photos - but now i want him to brush a lock of my hair back - hehe! And yes, he seems like a genuinely nice guy all around. gotta hand it to catherine hardwick for choosing such really likable peeps to play everyone!

    @vitaminr - don't think i haven't considered it!! but i can't... i just CAN'T. GAH!!!

    ReplyDelete
  22. I only saw this announcement today. AND I was at Quakerbridge about 2 hrs ago with my daughter. I only live approx. 15 minutes from that mall. Geez, I know my daughter's friend was interested in going Saturday but my daughter was not. Pfff! Oh, and my daughter has softball tryouts Saturday morning. You have no idea how much I want to go to meet PFach and you ladies!! I still don't know if I can be there. :(

    ReplyDelete
  23. I also live about 15 mins away from QB Mall & I am going on Saturday!! What time are you guys planning on getting there?? Please let me know...

    Tina

    ReplyDelete
  24. @Tiolie - Not sure exactly what time we will be there, but we'll definitely be tweeting about it when we figure it out! if you want, we can email you - send us an email with your contact info if you'd like!

    snarkierthanyou@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  25. @IGiveUp - If you can make it, let us know! The more the merrier - we're going to be there for a while, i think - lol...

    ReplyDelete
  26. Ahhh!!! Ill be there!!!! Ill be the short on with long brown hair in skinny jeans, eclipse shirt, nerd glasses, suspenders and knee high converse!
    I'm debating on if I should hop in my car and go now, or wait a few more hours. Lololol!
    =D

    ReplyDelete
  27. Small Twi-world...I am Tweeps with three of the people who went to VIP...one of whom was being accused of cheating. Such BS...
    Anyhoo, yeah--they had a fantastic time! I'm headed to Sheboygan for the 3rd time in less than a year next weekend...and I'm 40, as well. Pretty tame crowd in my experience. But I've never been to Joisey. ;-)
    Can't wait to see your write up about it--and see the pics!

    ReplyDelete
  28. @lila - YES!!! there is a company (Tantus, if I recall) that makes "The Vamp" - you can put it in the freezer and everything - lol! OK that's weird even by my standards, but yup they make it... : )

    @lisajsienna - he's definitely much more handsome in person - when we saw him and cullen at the NM premiere we attended, we were pretty blown away! probably would have passed out if rpatts would have walked in (along with the rest of the theater). i have a silver sharpie and was considering it, so thanks for the thumps-up there! can't WAIT!!

    @anon - we're prepared!! as prepared as we can be - lol... and i know i am going to be a mess for the pic - i take TERRIBLE photos - but now i want him to brush a lock of my hair back - hehe! And yes, he seems like a genuinely nice guy all around. gotta hand it to catherine hardwick for choosing such really likable peeps to play everyone!

    @vitaminr - don't think i haven't considered it!! but i can't... i just CAN'T. GAH!!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hi there ladies! I also attended one of these mall events and YES, he is EVEN MORE HANDSOME in person!! Many of the pics don't do him justice!!
    Strangely enough there were NOT throngs of screaming tweens there. Many were moms with daughters but many were ladies from 20 to 50 yrs old! (*cough-40 here*) So fear less about the anticipated thrashing! Also, take extra cash cause the PHOTO is $40 but to add an autograph it's $20 more! There were 2 lines-one for auto.'s only and one for auto. AND picture. We got so close that our pics of him were enough and the line for auto.'s was SO MUCH shorter, that we ditched the photo. You wait in line to pay and then split into the 2 seperate lines. You have to write on a paper what you want him sign on your item. **Take your black shirts, just buy a SILVER SHARPIE!!!** It shows up great! I bought a Carlisle shirt on eBay just for him to sign and its black!They also had many sharpies there with him. You stand right there by him while he signs--RIGHT fucking THERE!! Oh and the autograph only line went FIRST to the stage-may wanna consider it. But after the signing you line up for the picture with him. Oh and there were LOTS of vendors with Twi-merchandise, some on clearance so have even MORE cash ready!!
    Have fun, girls!! I was sure swooning like crazy!!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Did you know that you can shorten your long links with OUO and earn money from every visit to your shortened urls.

    ReplyDelete

Comments are our life now. Leave one!