Wednesday, March 30, 2011

A Rant and a Purpose

I'm going to warn you ahead of time — this is going to be a weird post. I'm all over the map tonight. Pour yourself a drink, make a snack and listen to me ramble. Work is sucking out the minuscule vestiges of my soul. Just to put in in perspective for you, a normal person in my line of work can only handle about 50 files per month before they try to slash their wrist with a pack of Post It Notes. I've had over 200 files this month alone. I am so burned out I can hardly see straight. I took the wrong exit driving home the other night because I couldn't remember where I lived. I was supposed to have a vacation this month, but I had to cancel it. Then I got sick — like delirium level sick — and wore myself out even further. I am tired. I am grumpy. I have access to the internet. This is a bad combination.

This is so me right now.

To top off my ridiculous month, I was involved in an "altercation" at work yesterday. Every office has at least one crazy person. I usually try to avoid these crazies, but they flock to me like moths to a flame. I still really don't have any clue what happened, but crazy people tend to be... crazy like that. All I know is that I was sitting at my desk one minute, begging the day to just end already, and the next I had a deranged person in my face, yelling about I-still-don't-know-what and spittle hitting my cheek. I managed to survive without getting punched in the face. Barely. I think her bloodstream was just so clogged with malted hops residue, it has slowed her motor skills. I expect a facepunch sometime next Monday.

Bella, you only had to sit between a pukey dude and a werewolf. Try walking in my shoes for a day. Whiner.

By the end of Tuesday, after sitting through two formal interviews about "the incident," I was ready to tie this week to a tree and put a bullet in its head. I pretended today was Friday just so I could make it through hump day. I was determined to leave on time and not stay until the moon was high in the sky. Unfortunately, we had a super angry client visit the office, cause a scene the likes of which I've never seen (that is saying something right there) and he had to be physically thrown out of the lobby. Then we had to go on lockdown until it was determined he'd left the premises. So much for leaving on time. I fucking hate this week.

I like to play 'just the tip' with my problems.

Throughout all of this, I've had this sinking feeling I was forgetting something important. I haven't left my child anywhere (I don't think), so I really had no clue what I was overlooking. Thank goodness I actually wrote it down for once. My brain is controlled by a monkey jacked up on Marlboros and energy pills.

This is an actual CT scan of my head.

I was supposed to remind you about the Fandom Gives Back Autism Speaks fundraiser. I am a moron. And an asshole. I was so wrapped up in my asinine problems, I forgot about people who have real ones. I might be whinier than Bella. At least I've never owned an ankle-length khaki skirt. But I digress...

Please consider donating to this great cause. A contribution of as little as $5 will get you a compilation of stories by a ton of fantastic authors. I wrote something that sucks — as per usual — and it will only be published in the compilation.$5 is a really inexpensive way to make yourself feel like a better person.

I had a point when I started this post. I lost it somewhere in my rambling. I think I was trying (and failing in an epic fashion) to convey that life can be a real asshole, but it can always be worse. Leave your rants in the comments and then click this link to leave a donation for Autism Speaks.


  1. I'm like working-80-hours-a-week stupid right now. There have been 6 days since Jan 1 that I haven't worked (and one was Jan 1, with a hangover so something of a waste.) So, I hear ya.

    Of late, the crazy working hours have something to do with the fact that we're hiring and I'm in charge of all the inquiries, aps, interviews, etc. Do you know how many people inquire about a job over email without capitalizing, punctuating, or spell-checking? How many people say "im into the job ur ofering"? Pass the sharpened stack of post-it notes, please. Or maybe 600 staples to the jugular will do the trick.

    I've been so busy that I've been reduced to lurking here. Just wanted to say thanks for being a place to come to, when I can drag my bloodied self over here.

    And yes, I'll drag my tortured self to FGB as well. A little perspective is always nice.

  2. I tweeted earlier that my day had just taken a @texaskatherine turn and this madness is what I meant. Holy hell, woman. You need to enter rehab for the rest and armed security alone.

    Oh, and if y'all make a generous donation to the Autism FGB, you'll get a bunch of my words too. Do it!

  3. I honestly believe that people flipping out at work should be against the law. What happened to professionalism? I mean at work least? Why is it that we are always told to take it in the ass and turn the other cheek... But it always seems like no one else has to??? It drives me insane !! Just sayin :)

  4. I will never complain about my job again. Thank you for that.


  5. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK, I just wrote you a long comment that I thought was quite perfect. FML, it disappeared. Whatever, I'm over it.

    Maybe I'll walk into some random office and go postal, maybe that will make me feel better...

    xo J

  6. Love ya TK!! I know. I'm quite unoriginal at this hour.

  7. TK, I feel your pain.

    RL is kicking my arse right now too, tonight I told someone I was 'otherwise engaged' when she wanted me to do something, simply so I could take a night to myself to regroup.

    Let me tell you right now I would donate in a heartbeat if I worked in the same currency :-)

    Also, please take heart that what I told you in that email a while back about you inspiring me... it's kicking in tomorrow! April 1st - first day of the rest of my life. Will tell you more later. L heart you.


  8. Jeeze where the fuck do you work, a prison?!?!

    You just made me love my job a little more. And by that, I mean I'll think twice before handing out face punches via email to asshole clients who send me rants on beautiful Saturday afternoons just to talk shit to me.

    Hope your week gets better doll.

  9. Ah yes, the crazies at work. How I love them. I feel your pain, TK.

    Oh, and that monkey has a pack of Winstons, not Marlboros. But I'll let it slide since you had a shitty day. Plus, you might kill me if I make fun of you even more...

  10. DUDE!! I'm sorry someone went postal on YOU. However when it has happened here where I work it is sooo fun to watch. The owner of the company I work for is my uncle and he gets red faced & screams at whomever. Same with my boss. LOL! I think I may have gotten the brunt of it before. May have even cried. People suck. I think I'm still sleeping because this is a really rambling comment. HAHAHA!

  11. Sounds like you need to quit your job. No job is worth all that. I quit a good, well-paying job because of working with crazy people. I was so stressed I wanted to cry everyday (and did some days). I quit and started temping again and it was the BEST choice I have ever made. Now I work FT at a place I love.

  12. Where the hell do you work that they "lock the place down"? San Quentin? Life is short - get out of there....
    Honestly - you sound too smart & clever - run for the exit.

  13. TK- You make my job sound so much better by comparison. Sorry RL sucks so much for you right now.

    You know I will pay to read anything you write. I clicked on the link & couldn't figure out how to make a donation to FGB. Hopefully someone on twitter can help me with that tonight.

  14. There will be crazies anywhere you work. I work at a ski resort - should be a happy place where people vacation. The 'guests' are aholes often but last week a guy, after screaming at ticket office staff because HE forgot his pass in his bazillion $ home on the mountain then threw his helmet through a window and had to be hauled off by ski patrol. I'm so over it. At least summer will be here and we can deal with the drunk parents that let their kids vandalize the lodge during concerts. Thanks everyone for sharing.

  15. Geez, do you work at an insurance or finance company? My mom's house burned down in a wildfire and I now work at a non-profit who helps people with their claims and let me tell you... the claim process can get intense so I can understand someone showing up and going postal on an insurance office. Not that it's cool to show up and go postal at someone's office, just that I understand the frustration.

    My step-mom used to work at GMAC (retired in the 80's) and crazies would show up there sometimes and they had to shut the place down. Eventually they had to put up bullet proof glass at all of the offices when a guy who had his car repo'd showed up at one of the offices with a gun.

  16. I work at a CPA firm and it is tax season. We're all a little "stretched" right now, but the end is in sight (thank GOD!)

  17. Being overworked and overstressed seems to be the in thing right now. I can't figure out why but there are few I talk to that aren't feeling the crazy.

    I am very sorry for your day/week/month but you are correct that there are worse things out there in the world and that is something you can use to offset the ick.

    Hugs to you and please be safe.

  18. TK - first of all, I would like to apologize for laughing at your misfortune, cause I did. A lot. But, it was not because I relish your pain, it was because work has pretty much sucked for me lately and I feel your pain. Today I spent the first half of the day only eating two Jenny Craig bars and the second half slamming back Reeses peanut butter Easter eggs. That helped a little.

    Secondly, I had to stare at the Facepunch pic for a few seconds cause I couldn't figure out who that guy was sitting next to Bella cause I thought she sat between Mike Newton and Jacob. I saw that movie a million times and that's the first time it struck me just how bad Mike looked in it. Wtf?!

  19. Thank you, TK!
    I'm a parent of a child with autism and although it's no walk in the park, I also realize other people have insane jobs who force them off bridges sometimes. It's ok, you are allowed! Breathe :)
    thank you for the shout out to autism speaks!

  20. I have two children, Liam and Nicky, with Autism. So mabey your donations to Autism Speaks will somehow make their way back to my kiddo's. Every penny helps these families and the funds raised helps research this disability. All silliness aside, help these kids and adults with Autism. Most of them don't have a voice of their own. Both of mine can't speak and are NOT Rainman. Please, donate.

  21. I honestly believe that people flipping out at work should be against the law. What happened to professionalism? I mean at work least? Why is it that we are always told to take it in the ass and turn the other cheek... But it always seems like no one else has to??? It drives me insane !! Just sayin :)

  22. Are you paying more than $5 per pack of cigarettes? I buy my cigarettes from Duty Free Depot and I'm saving over 60%.


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