Thursday, March 3, 2011

Screw Calgon... Robert Pattinson, Take Me Away!

I think this post deserves a disclaimer: My brain is nothing but mushy toast today and I can barely recite my own name, let alone actually come up with something remotely clever this evening. All I want to do is post pretty pictures of the Preh-tay and call it a day...but I'm going to torture you with my day along the way. And reward you with a nice pressie at the end. No jumping ahead!

Please play me... like you play that piano.

You see, today the company I work for had a huge presentation to try and acquire a new client - a really big client. In this economy, the competition for quality clients is high and the ad agency I work for has labored for weeks on this pitch. These things drain you faster than a thirsty vampire...and right now, I feel like the life has been sucked out of me. And not in a "ooh, Edward Cullen just sucked my blood {{{blissful swoon}}}" kind of way.

If you're anything like me, just the thought of giving a presentation to a group of nearly a dozen potential clients is enough to give you the shits for days. I despise public speaking. And regardless of how many courses and seminars I take in order to better prepare myself for these types of instances, I still get so nervous my stomach takes on a life of its own. And that life normally consists of shitting...lots and lots of shitting.

Don't worry... I won't shit anywhere near you honey. That's JJ. You gotta watch her.

While preparing the notes for my talking points, I thought maybe it would be a good idea to add in a few pictures of RPattz to relax me. I mean, he is my happy place. But then I figured that rubbing my notes all over my body and moaning his name while standing in front of company executives is probably a bad idea and will most likely not win us the account. So instead, I stood nervously in front the room, coming very close to fucking hurling on the poor, middle-aged woman who had the unfortunate privilege of sitting closest to me.

All in all, the presentation went well. We should know sometime next week if we won the business. We've all got our fingers crossed because we need this account. Please keep yours crossed too!

Yes fingers are crossed. Sort, not really. But I'm playing with my fingers and thinking of you.

And now... as your reward for sitting through this uber boring post, listen to this interview Ryan Seacrest did with Robert Pattinson if you haven't already today. Who knows? I could be the last person on earth to hear it after the day I've had. Nothing brightens my day like listening to that giggle. And nothing moistens my panties like that voice.

RobonSeacrestFull by johannabr



  1. Holy heck,LKW!Looks like I'm #1

  2. My fingers are crossed for you LKW!! Glad to hear you did not, in fact, hurl on the execs!

    God, Rob's voice and giggles are heaven. Loved that interview. How can you not love and enjoy listening to someone who is just so down-to-earth and unpretentious as Rob!

  3. Thank God for you guys !!! I run to my room every night excited to see what the next post is gonna be... I laugh so hard i almost pee myself! i thought i was the only one with this twisted sense of humor!Thanks for putting a bright spot in my days!

  4. Crossing fingers too! Ryan Seacrest told him to insert his answers....that not what I would tell him to insert.

  5. You said "moist" Love! Love the new WFE trailer, now talk about moist! Whew! Can't wait!

  6. Oh wow, I loved listening to that!! "That must be why I got beaten last night." LMAO. And I couldn't agree with you more - that giggle of his is stomach-clenchingly, toe-curlingly, sighing-constantly gorrrgeous. Thank you so much for posting. ANNND thank you so much for posting those pics too! The piano one is stunning (and the finger porn - mmmm-mmmmmm from that last beautiful pic. *SIIIIIIIGH*)

    PS: hope everything works out the way you want it too at work. Good luck. xoxo

  7. Just hearing his voice calms me....I think I may have a, who the fuck cares!

    Glad your presentation went well. I am going to go watch the new WFE trailer yet causes my body to do strange things. So freaking excited.


    P.S. Ryan Seacrest is so fucking annoying.....I mean really? Gah.

  8. Good luck with the new client. I loathe having to speak to a group, so you have my sympathy on that.

    Thanks for the clip, it was nice to hear him in good humor. I just read the Vanity Fair article and was saddened that the Twi-herds (no that is not a typo) are making him a recluse. I'll be hoping that his friends and family keep him grounded. If you really "love" him, don't be a crazy stalker chick, do you really think he would go for someone like that??? Get a handle on your hormones for the love of all that's holy.

  9. Rob's giggle FTW! *sigh* FLOVE it.

    I forgot to listen to that interview last night, and they've got the internet locked up too tight to listen here at work. Dammit!

    Glad your presentation went well. And that it's over. I'm the same when it comes to public speaking.

  10. Ugh-I'm like you when it comes to public speaking to those I'm trying to impress...if it's the people at work, those I can tell off when ever I feel like it! Good luck and my fingers are crossed for you getting the new client!

    I missed the interview yesterday and thankfully happened to have my headphones in my desk and am listening to it right now. OME-I faching love listening to that accent in my ear!! I am visualizing that grin and giggle and that he's using it as we're getting to "know" each other! :)

  11. I really like the idea of inserting RPattz pics into presentation material. I can't believe I never thought of that.

  12. Love how he's so polite and gracious to that Seacrest fool! The laugh makes me smile....[swoon]...and have naughty thoughts.

  13. Is it weird to want an 8 minute ring tone? Ugggghhhh... Love that man. The tall, smoldering British one...Not Ryan. Ugh. What a douche nozzle.

    I think adding RPattz pics to your presentation for calming effects is a genius idea. However I would be more concerned about the wetness dripping down my thigh...Maybe that's how you win the account! Just in case, though, I'll keep my mental fingers crossed for you! LKW is a goddess and damn it she deserves your damn business, people! She will kick so much ass!!

    <3 you. And Rob. Can't lie...Prolly love Rob more.

  14. @Lindsay Rae - If you succeed in making an 8 minute ring tone, please share. Although I'd never answer my phone because I'd just be listening to my phone ring. I'm sick.

  15. OMG, I could listen to that clip forever and forever and forever. He's so fucking cute.

    And I still want to shit in his trailer.

  16. Aaahh Rob... love, Love, LOVE that man!! Thanks LKW!!

  17. I'm sure you said some amazing things in this post, but as soon as I saw the audio clip - I was a goner.

    And yes, I scroll through all posts to see the pics before reading. It kinda sets the tone for me.


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