This post is going to be a little random, mainly because 1) I'm trying to write 2) shovel a cold, leftover hamburger into my face and, 3) give my liver a little preparation for the beating I plan on giving it when I go out tonight. All at the same exact time.
Also, I've had like five cups of coffee. And candy. Fuck yeah, I love candy.
Anyway, despite the almost inhuman amount of caffeine I consumed today, I still managed to fall asleep on the train on the way home. I swear I sleep better on that train than I do in my own bed, which is good thing because I'd probably be in jail for manslaughter if I didn't. I'm not sure if that makes sense. Just go with it.
Perhaps because of all the caffeine coursing through my veins, I actually had a very vivid dream, which is unusual. In this dream, Snarkier Than You and I were standing on line waiting to get our pictures taken with Peter Facinelli. We were chatting and I dropped the f-bomb, which for some reason mortally offended the woman standing behind us. I was amused by her ire and suggested she go "suck a fuck" (thanks, Donnie Darko) which apparently really pissed her off. STY just sort of stood there with an incredulous and slightly appalled expression on her face as the interaction escalated into thinly veiled threats of violence (coming from me, though I suspect I don't need to point that out). Eventually, I was being led away (somewhat forcefully, I might add) by the mall rent-a-cops and yelling at the woman that I was going to shit on her car when STY looked at me and said, very calmly, "I'll meet you outside when I'm done here. Don't shit on my car."
Even dream-me is an obnoxious fucking asshole. And I'm pretty sure dream-STY's reaction is exactly how real-STY would react in that situation. [STY's note: Totally spot on.]
Moving right along...
I know we've talked about Water for Elephants here and there and I have to admit that my general impression of the movie is that it will be "good." Not "great," just "good." Of course, I get to eyefuck the shit out of Robert Pattinson the entire time so I was content with the prospect of "good".
Then I saw this:
Dudes, that trailer totally changed my attitude about this movie. Fuck "good," this movie is going to be kick-ass. Towards the end, when he yells "Marlena!!!", I like to pretend he's actually yelling "Jenny!!!!" The fact that I am drinking heavily now will probably work in my favor here.
Speaking of Water for Elephants, I do have some sad news: I will not be able to attend the NYC premiere on April 17th. We had it all planned out (well as much as we plan anything which isn't a lot): LKW was going to drive down from Maine and me, her and STY were going to hobnob with RPattz and send taunting and tortuous emails and texts to Texas Katherine, who lives too far away to attend.
Instead, I will be in Atlantic City for Choodles' bachelorette party. I plan on antagonizing her the entire night until she either cries or punches me [STY's note - having met Choodles, I am putting my money on the latter - you should leave a preemptive steak in your freezer - it's THAT much of a sure thing, imho] as punishment for scheduling her bach party the same weekend as the premiere. The only saving grace is that the last time I went to AC with Choodles, we almost died AND got arrested, but not in that order. So, at the very least, I'll probably have an awesome story to tell y'all when I get back.