Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Random Celebrity Sighting - The Alexander Skarsgard Edition

So yesterday was pretty much like every other day at work. I read emails, I made evil comments under my breath about the emails I was reading, I sent emails that no one would bother reading... you know, that sort of thing.

Eventually, I needed a little break so I decided to take a trip downstairs to the office store and get me some candy. Starbursts, specifically.

Now that looks like a delightful afternoon snack... 

This did not happen.

When the elevator doors pinged open, some very excited woman tried to leap out and then realized it wasn't the ground floor. I didn't recognize her so I figured she was just from another office.

"Hurry, hurry, HURRY," she told me. I kind of laughed and asked her if she eager to escape for the day or something.

"No," she said, "Alexander Skarsgard is outside."

I have never made a decision so fast in my fucking life. "I'm going with you," I replied. The lure of Starbursts was immediately forgotten at the prospect of getting a little eye-candy instead.

And that's how I ended up skulking around the front of my office, camera phone in hand, with half my co-workers as we tittered and acted essentially how a bunch of women would act when in the presence of the uber hotness known as Alexander Skarsgard. Like goddamn teenagers.

At first I just sort of lingered across the street because at the end of the day, I'm kind of a paparazzi fail. For some reason, my itty bitty conscience always raises its morally ethical head when I'm trying to take pictures of celebrities and I feel bad about invading their privacy.

 I believe the paparazzi call this "the chickenshit angle"...

Then someone who was a higher up in the company told me she would get me fired if I didn't get closer and get better pictures. I'm pretty sure she didn't mean it but...Game on, mother fuckers.

I crept a little closer and tried to snap a few more pictures. Feeling emboldened, I moved from the street onto the sidewalk. A colleague yelled Alexander's name. I ducked behind a car. I was threatened with termination again. Apparently, that was all the encouragement I needed because I walked up to about three feet away from him and took some pictures.

Then my phone died and I ran back inside.

Not an hour later I was informed that I was taking a trip to Alexander Skarsgard's trailer and was to wait there until he came out so I could take a picture. I didn't want to tell my coworkers that I have a bad reputation as far as celebrities and their trailers go, so I agreed. When I got there, it appeared that my reputation had, indeed, preceded me. Or someone on this blog is handy with photoshop. One of those.

Admittedly, I felt like a total tool the whole time I was skulking around but it was worth it. Alexander Skarsgard is one lovely-looking man. And tall! Holy shit is that man tall. I'm pretty sure you could cut glass with his chiseled jaw. Normally the blondes don't do it for me but I would definitely make an exception for that man. Hell, I'd make a lot of exceptions for him. I'll bet Latchkey Wife would even temporarily remove the "Exit Only" sign hanging over her ass if he asked nicely. Or not nicely.


  1. Slightly jealous. I mean you have an office store that sells Starburst. No fair!! Alexander Skarsgard is fine, the biggest celebrities I have seen at my place of employment have been Miss New York and various SU basketball players. :P

  2. I can't believe you didn't even TRY to get into his trailer loo. Loser.

  3. squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! I am so jealous! I would also have hidden, because I would be afraid that if he talked to me I would either cry stupidly or sexually assault him.

    Nothing that exciting ever happens at my work, although there was a car fire in our parking lot last night...

  4. OMG Where is your office and why was Skarsgard loitering out he front??

  5. Swoons and thud! Nothing exciting like that ever happens in my Podunk town. That's why I like to live vicariously via your blog.

  6. Holymutherfuckingshit, JJ!

    How in the world did you hold back? That man is...

    My husband, the enabler, bought me the True Blood calendar for Christmas. I think it was March or April Alexander graced the page, and I haven't turned the page since.


    I also read an interview with him where he said that when a scene on TB calls for him to be nude, he does it in the nude. No "sock" or anything. Sweet baby Jesus, how in the hell do I get a job on that set???

    Swoon again.

  7. What is it with these Jen/Jenny girls meeting/seeing the Sexy Skarsgard aka Eric Northman?

    His bio says his 6'4". Know what that means...he probably has a size...13-14 shoe. Jeez, what are you thinkin'?

  8. OMG! I would die!

  9. Oh mai gawd. FUCK ME...ASkars, please?

    JJ you may or may not know I have a 'slight' obsession with Mr. Skarsgard, as of late. Forunately the stars aligned and got to take a picture with him in the lobby of the Hard Rock Hotel during Comic Con. Holy shit is right, the dude is sooooo fucking tall and so fucking sexy. The blondes never did it for me either...until he rolled around.

    I give you huge kudos for snapping some killer pics, even if you felt like a douche doing it. High five sweets!

    xoxo J

    *goes back to look at pics and possiblly likc screen*

  10. Um..."licks screen"...geez...typos! I only had 1 glass of vino, 3 hours ago. Damn bloodwork in the AM messing up my drinking myself to sleep routine. I kid. Sort of.

  11. Please for Christ sake help this poor boy from Haiti.

  12. @Spidermonkey - they also sell chewy Sprees. Bet you're super jealous now.

    @gabbythevampyrslayer - I work in NYC and my area seems to be a hot spot for filming - they are always filming something here. But usually it's something lame like the Smurfs, lol.

    @Rottymama - He is TALL. Like, super tall. I didn't realize 6'4'' was that tall (then again, I'm 5'1'' so everyone is fucking tall to me, lol) but UNF. He's so pretty.

  13. Holy crap! That's f*ing AWESOME! What movie was he shooting? Nothing like that would ever happen in Indiana where I live ;0 So you better be grateful bitch :)

  14. Whoa whoa whoa!! You're not a bad paparazzi. At.All. I think I'd be solid frozen if I saw him and wouldn't muster my shit together to take a photo.

    Just a random FYI, I had googled Alexander's height before, and it turned out he was exactly the same height as my husband. Ok, I was lying, it's not a random fyi, I just wanted to brag that I have a little bit of Alexander at home, er... or something like that. Unlike Jen, I cannot blame my current crazyness/idiocy on an alcoholic beverage. ;)

  15. FreakyBella - he's filming "What Maisie Knew" with Julianne Moore.

  16. JJ, I freaking love this man. In fact, I often yell at the t.v. screen if anything happens to his character on True Blood which makes my husband very irritated. I think because Alex feels closer in age to me than Rob, I tend to obsessed a little more over him. Good job stalking! Next time, go ask to take a pic with him. I hear he is very nice and adores his fans.

  17. I had no idea what all this ASkars fuss was about until a year ago when someone sent me the YouTube clip of this delightful hunk of mansteak straight up FUCKING a woman chained up in a basement.

    IMMEDIATE-FUCKING-LY added all available seasons of True Blood to my Netflix queue. He's butter. The man is just BUTTER.

    Bitch, I love you for these photos. It's cool that you didn't take the Browns to his Superbowl.


  18. Mama

    Link to said clip...

  19. Can you do a second post on this again? He is totally my number 1!

  20. That guy.... JEEZUS that guy! He's phenomenal. We need to get you stalking lessons. I will hide in Forks and you can try and find me to take pics. Deal? Deal.

  21. Holy Shit the photo shopped door sign, this "Hell, I'd make a lot of exceptions for him. I'll bet Latchkey Wife would even temporarily remove the "Exit Only" sign hanging over her ass if he asked nicely. Or not nicely." Literally had me laughing.

    I adore the Skars and I'm afraid I would have been much like you in my efforts to take a picture of him. Though I do hear he is super nice and does like his fans I just don't know if I could walk up to him, or if he would even see me, cause I'm super short. Like a total of 5 feet.

    Love the post and I think I might have found a new blog to stalk. :)

  22. AHHHHH!!!!! I am fucking passing this on to my bff TB ASkars fan. We can die of squee together.

    I'm pretty sure your phone died because Alex drains all power from everything around him. He's that fucking sexy. And uh...what "Exit Only" sign? I have a fucking open 24hr sign up...In neon. So he can't miss it.

    Cuz I iz a h00r.

  23. Hmmmmm.... pretty. May I have a taste? Just one little lick? I too am not a fan of blonde boys but between ASkars and Jax from SoA, YUMMEH!!

  24. I was at lunch with AllTwiedUp and TwiKiwi50 in California when you tweets hit. I thought they were going to explode when I showed them the picture of him walking. I also lost them for a time while they read through the tweets trying to figure out what was going on.

    Do we know what he was filming?

    Your picture of him walking is pretty amazing for a cell phone and JJ probably shaking like crazy ;)

  25. WOW! OMG! WOW! okay I said that already but look at this man! WOW!He's got a week's worth of length to him and I'm lovin' him in all black

    Lucky, lucky you! And you have the greatest coworker/colleagues!

  26. Soooo jealous! I just want to stand next to him so I can feel short for once (I'm 6').

  27. He's Swedish you know... And Swedish guys are hot. Lucky me, I live in Stockholm and have a Swedish guy! ;P

  28. Yeah, and that reminds me...! I saw one of Alexanders' younger brothers at the beach the other day. He's an actor too (like his two older brothers and their father) and he's going to be totally hot too in a couple of years... Trust me.


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