Wednesday, September 21, 2011

What to Bring to Forks, What to Leave at Home.

 ...and will be here again next week!

So for those of you playing along at home, the second (and final) pilgrimage to the Twilighty holy land is ONE WEEK AWAY! [Insert majorly girly "SQUEEE!!!" noises and the sound of me hyperventilating here.] I still can hardly believe we made this trip the first time, and I'm still in a state of panic disbelief that we're going back to do it again! Anyone coming who doesn't want to hang out in a random parking lot all night needs to sign up on the Elks Lodge RSVP list HERE. (please don't sign up more than once or LKW's head will explode, and we need her. This is the same RSVP list we posted last week, but we want to catch any last-minute stragglers to add to the official headcount. Thx.)

I've seen lots of excited chatter from people on twitter and in emails wondering what to bring, what to wear, what they'll need - you know, the basic "HFS I can't believe I'm doing this [again] - what am I going to doooooo?!?"

So I thought a little Forks-y 101 primer from someone who I can guarantee is more worried about this whole thing than you might be helpful. That being said, if you leave your toothbrush at home and forget to bring underwear, don't blame me.

No gift shop or concierge. Plan accordingly.

What to bring to Forks:

Your sense of humor.

Any Twilight gear that you want to raffle off.

A back-up liver.

Any clothes that you feel good in.

Bail money if you don't plan on riding the short bus with us.

Any & all anti-frizz hair potions known to mankind (and your hairdryer, if you use one).

Your willingness to try new things and push your boundaries.

Any anti-anxiety meds you have legal access to, should you need them.

All the Twilighty crap that you are too embarrassed to wear in public the other 362 days of the year.

Shoes that can take you from the beach to dance floor to the trails of the Hoh rainforest.

I am not outdoorsy AT ALL but you need to be able to walk here...

...and here.

What to leave at home:

Your worries - all of them - including but not limited to:

I won't know anyone.

I'm too shy to meet new people.

Nobody will talk to me.

I'm too young/old/fat/skinny/black/white/city/country/unprepared for this shit.

Also? Don't feel like you need to have an entirely new wardrobe that's different than what you wore last year. I can barely remember what I wore yesterday (hell, if I don't look down, I'd be hard-pressed to tell you what I am wearing at this very moment) and I can guarantee that nobody was paying that much attention. I have a semi-burning need to go and get a new coat to wear this year but I keep reminding myself that the coat I wore last year is awesome, has lots of pockets and a hood, and couldn't be more perfect for this trip unless it came with a built-in Robert Pattinson. I can't wait to wear it while I schlep across the street to get coffee and possibly croissants from Mocha Motion. I miss standing in line at that drive-thru coffeemat trailer, sucking in the fumes of the SUV in front of me, waiting to scurry back to the motel with caffeine and breakfast-y goodness.

Another thing? Nobody cares if you are five or ten or twenty pounds skinnier of heavier than you were last year. I keep seeing snippets of conversations where people are strategizing on how to lose a few pounds pre-Forks, and I am here to tell you this: it doesn't matter. Don't mess yourself up over this, ok? Last year I came to Forks after being on the "holy fucking shit my mom died" diet for several weeks, and frankly, I don't recommend it. Be happy, wear what you feel good in, dress up if you want to or don't if that's not your thing. It's all good. I have never, ever known a group of people who just unequivocally find joy in each others company the way this group does, and honestly all you have to do is show up and be willing to have fun, and you will.

I might totally squish JJ under my massive weight this year, but that won't stop me from riding her like a driftwood pony at Rialto beach.

So from the old hands who have a whole year of experience to reflect on to the newbies who will be riding this crazy train for the first time, what do YOU think you absolutely positively need to bring (and not bring...) to Twilight mecca???


  1. This year, I am bringing something with a penis.


    Man, I fucking love us.


  2. I am bringing my new flask, my Converse, my hoodie, and my best friend. What else could I need?

  3. I can't be there this year because of my damn wedding, but I can certainly contribute to the What The Fuck Should I Bring Vault. STY pretty much covered it all. I wholeheartedly agree with her anti frizz serum recommendation. You'll need it. It barely misted while I was there, but my hair seemed to think it was raining every damn day.

    Other things I think you should bring:

    PEPTO or Imodium - If not for the drinking... for the Mushroom Ravioli, or the apple juice at the diner across the street from the Forks Motel.

    PADS/TAMPONS - Ummmm, who wants to be bleeding in FORKS?!?! No thank you.

    $$$ - For boooooooze!

    A BELLA-ESQUE COAT - Old Navy has them now...I mean, who doesn't want to channel Bella whilst in Forks?!

    That is all ;)

    XOXO J

  4. The only thing I'm not bringing is the person I brought with me last year, and I don't think anyone else needs that advice (dear God, I hope they don't).

    That said - anyone rooming with me (you know who you are) can use my hairdryer. :) Other than that, I like the lists you've got!!

    SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! One week from RIGHT NOW I'll be drinking with y'all!!!!

  5. From my recent Forks experience (which was in 100% pure unadulterated SUNSHINE, by the way), All I can say is please take lots of TIPS for Travis. He is awesome. And he did not pay me to say this.

    Have fun, biotches!

    For any first timers, I posted hints here:

    For anyone NOT going that wants to join in the I'm-not-in-Forks-pity-party, please feel free, we'll be on Twitter!

    For anyone interested in a Twitard gathering in HAWAII in 2013... please raise your hand HERE:

    kthxbye x

  6. Seeing as I live in Hawaii, I personally think TwiKiwiFifty's idea is amazing!! It would be fucking fantastic if you all came here. I was SO bummed that I couldn't make it to Forks. As jealous as I am that you all are going, I do hope you have a great time.

  7. I can't believe it's only a week away. I'm a first timer and nobody there will know me except the friend I'm bringing with me. I bought a Bella-esque Old Navy jacket last year so I think I'm good to go. I cannot wiat to get out there!


  8. I still have to get through four days of work before I leave for this trip. Ugh, its so owning me right now.
    My hubby has been asking for a week now "are you excited about your trip?" I said yes, but I cant think about it yet. Let me deal with (Budgets, crazy people, phonecalls, rat infestation, collections, paperwork, meetings and more meetings) then I can focus on FOOOORRRRKKKKKKSSSSSSSS.

    I can tell you that those in RL that know about my trip to Seattle thinks it's cool and are *slightly* jealous.
    Though, I have one friend who was recently bitten by the Jackson bug (its my fault, I took her to the show) she's insanely jealous.
    I also introduced her to your blog so Im sure shes lurking around here somewhere..

    Cant wait to meet you all

  9. I'm so jealous of all you wonderful ladies that are getting to go! I wanted to go badly last year, but it is even worse this year knowing it is the last one! This post almost made me cry. I'm mainly a lurker here but you still feel like family and I wish I could meet some of you. I have no one in RL who shares my obsession.

    I hope you all have a wonderful time!!!

  10. *tears* reading this:
    "Another thing? Nobody cares if you are five or ten or twenty pounds skinnier or heavier than you were last year. I keep seeing snippets of conversations where people are strategizing on how to lose a few pounds pre-Forks, and I am here to tell you this: it doesn't matter. Don't mess yourself us over this, ok? Last year I came to Forks after being on the "holy fucking shit my mom died" diet for several weeks, and frankly, I don't recommend it. Be happy, wear what you feel good in, dress up if you want to or don't if that's not your thing. It's all good. I have never, ever known a group of people who just unequivocally find joy in each others company the way this group does, and honestly all you have to do is show up and be willing to have fun, and you will."

    Snarky you could not have said it better. I have never felt more accepted in my life. All of you have opened your arms and your hearts and I truly could not have imagined a more amazing group of people.

    The funny thought: If we can accept/deal with the wigs in the Twilight Saga movies, we can accept/deal with anything :)

    I can't wait to see you all next week!!

  11. Bring not only your camera, but your charger/backup battery too. A hundred beautiful faces and one of the most visually stunning places on earth await!

    And, agree, leave anxiety at home! This group is so friendly. If you know no one, come find me, I'll be nice!

  12. MyHeartGoesPitterPattinsonSeptember 22, 2011 at 10:08 AM

    I'm almost more jealous of all you twat wrinkles that are getting to go to Forks than I am of KStew for getting to bone Rob. Do you ever wonder if she pulls the "not tonight...I have a headache," move? That would be like a cardinal sin. I bitches have fun in Forks!!!!

  13. I'm sad that it's the last one, and oh sooo excited for next week. I'm so looking forward to seeing everyone again.

    There is nothing to worry about for the first timers, this group is so accepting.

  14. DANGGIT!! I left a comment last night and &^%$ Blogger ate it! Ah well... I have to remember to leave my temper in NJ, too - lol...

    I am misty reading all the comments and can't wait to see you and/or meet you next week! I wish everyone who reads the blog could go, but we mighthave to build our own structure if we had that many people - Forks definitely could NOT handle that many Twitards, in many, many ways...

    Smooches! Getting warmed up for lots of hugging next week!

  15. Clothing in WA...

    Come prepared for Sun & Rain. As of today it's supposed to be rain, rain, rain, Friday looks pretty good, rain, and sunny on Sunday. But that could change between now & next week. HECK! It could change between now & tomorrow! LOL!


    rain jacket

    shoes that you don't mind getting wet and/or sandy

    shoes to keep out the wet and muddy
    (if you have shoes that are both of these combined...that is awesome.)

    Hair dryer (we forgot one last time)

    Personally I like to bring extra socks cause I hate when my feet get wet & I have to walk around in wet ones.

    Sunglasses. Especially if you are light sensitive. Just because it's cloudy here doesn't mean it isn't effin bright.

    I think that's all I can recommend. I'll probably think of something else later. Like while we're half-way there & "OH SHIT I FORGOT TO BRING..." LOL!

    I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!

  16. OH YEAH!! I'll be emailing you girls next Spring to start asking about "touristy" stuff to do in NY. I've decided I want to go there as a 30th B-day present to myself. I've only been in JFK airport. I never wanted to go there before until recently. Wouldn't mind hitting the other close states & DC too. I'm not really a big city person so it should be an experience!

  17. This post made me all misty-eyed cause I have the best memories from last year. Snarky is right - this is the most accepting group in the world and you will immediately feel like you're with old friends. I promise, these are your people. Enjoy!!!

    P.S. Las Vegas would be a great place for a 2012 Twitarded rendevous. Just sayin'.

  18. @TwiloveSue - there is a group working on Vegas for June 8-10, 2012. TwificMeetup on Twitter and they started a blog is putting it together. So far there are 90 people going and I only know 3 of them last I checked.

  19. Wish I could go, but I am glad to be working on the pins and will be there in spirit! xo Lys

  20. I CAN NOT FREAKIN' WAIT. I need to expand my vocabulary. I think I've used that sentence a million times in the last few months.

    I'm thinking after the stressful real life stuff I've had going on lately, I'll be good just to get myself there...all the rest of the stuff is just bonus. Hopefully some clothes and a toothbrush at least make it with me.

    I'm so glad you guys decided to do another those of us who didn't get to go last year a chance to experience Twitarded in Forks! I'm sure it's pain in the ass to get it all put together, so THANK YOU from the bottom of my *sparkly-Edward-lovin'-heart*!

  21. This mommy can't go. I have so many excuses it's disgusting, but I want you moggy bitches to have fun! Take LOTS of pictures this time. Take snap shots of places and things we'd like to see. I wish I could go. Ugh! Damn these firtle ovaries! Someone call the whaaaaaaaambulence!!!!

  22. Can't make it this year but had a BLAST last year.

    I suggest lots of clothes which can be layered, comfy shoes, a hat (bad hair times), and I second the Immodium comment! I traveled alone and met lots of you sweet, welcoming people even though I'm super shy.

    Enjoy the weekend ladies! I'll be there in spirit!

  23. seriously just cried reading this post and all the comments. i have been looking forward to this for months and the last couple days had thought about not going. my RL has been very difficult this month. it seemed like this would be frivolous to do right now. but i think it will do my heart some good! i look forward to mtg as many of you as i can! i will be giving hugs! 6 days h00rs!

  24. @Abigail - I'm bringing my Converse too.

    @Amy E - SO happy you had a great time and that you were brave enough to travel alone. That's fucking great!!

    @TwiLoveSue - XOXOXO. Will miss you. :)

    Gah! It's been a crazy day and these comments kept popping up on my phone alert and I would sneak peeks at them in between meetings and MADE MY WHOLE DAY.

    So stoked so see those who can make it. And will miss those who can't.

    @LibbyBelle - I'll see you in Forks, m'kay? Tell me you want a hug when you see me and we can give RL shit a break, just for a couple of days. :)

  25. @sty - When u find that coat with RPatz included can you get me one too? Kthx ;)

    Things I'm bringing: my chucks, my Reaper Crew hoodie & my camera...I'm debating whether I should bring my lil digital or my big 35mm slr (does anyone know if kodak still makes film???), my Rob flask.

    Things I'm leaving at home: my 6 year old, even though he wants to come, cuz in case you were wondering this is kindof an nc-17 crowd & my emotional baggage cuz RL truly is an evil cunt punching bitch. And there are no evil bitches allowed in Forks, which is also why I'm not bringing one of the women I traveled with last year.

    I had a blast last year & I am counting the seconds for this year.

  26. Snarky said it all!

    Don't forget your phone charger, camera battery charger maybe a extention cord strip-thingy to plug all that into! LOL!

    Gonna miss some of you who are not attending--you know who you are! We shall see you another time!

    Oh Yea, FORKS!!

  27. This post got me all choked up. I really can't afford to go anymore this year than last, but fuck it. I'm going. See ya in 6 days!

  28. Oh, bloody hell! Serum, serum, serum! I'm gonna be rockin' one helluva 'fro by the sounds of things!

    I promise, I will park my concerns at the boarding gate at Heathrow and shall embrace my Twitardedness full-pelt from the moment I board my flight. I just have to get through the packing stage. O_o

    Can't wait to meet all of you! This is my big girly dream come true!

    CC x

  29. There is more of me to hug this year but I guess that means there is more of me to go around..wait...that didn't come out right. Can. not. wait.

  30. Hope you girls have a BLAAAAAST! Can't go again due to spending my life savings on conventions (shuddup).
    love you all!

  31. I am not bringing my buddy from last year @Lorabell *sad*

    I am bringing:
    -my poka-dot rainboots
    -comfy sneakers
    -extra socks
    -warm clothes
    -camera and charger
    -cell and charger with roaming data package
    -more vodka

    I am probably bringing a few extra pounds also but that just means there is more of me to molest, i mean love ;)

    Can't wait to do this all again :-)

  32. The photo remember me a scene of twilight were bella it's walking near to a beach with Jacob.


Comments are our life now. Leave one!