I've expressed my love for zombies on this blog, and I've expressed my love for Edward Cullen all over this blog, as well as numerous pairs of underpants. But then I got to thinking (which is always dangerous), what if I combined my loves?
And then I got my new iPhone 4S, which might be the most amazing thing in the world, and started downloading a billion apps and came across the Zombifier: 3D Zombie Booth. Fuck yeah! It's totally worth the $0.99. I zombified everything but the kitchen sink. Dogs make scary zombies. Turns out, Edward Cullen makes a pretty scary zombie too. I know... I do have too much time on my hands.
Oh my lips are so chapped.
Um Edward, looks like you got a little bit of your lunch on your shirt.
I'm feeling a little nauseous, that corpse must have been rotten.
What do you mean I need dental work?
One of the best parts of this app is that it animates your zombie. And if you touch the screen, it will try to eat your finger. Not really what I had in mind when I said I wanted Edward to eat me, but beggars can't be choosers, right?
Say "excuse me" Edward.
I think Zombieward might be my new favorite "ward". I feel this strange need to feed him stuff. I need to keep my pet zombie happy. Or whatever it is the living dead feel. Not hungry? Better just make sure to have some weaponry on hand in case he gets a little too handsy.