Tuesday, November 15, 2011

What's All the Fuss, Twiland?? Oh Yeah, BREAKING DAWN PART ONE, MOTHERTRUCKERS (Spoiler Free)

Last night, I basically wandered around my house, absently touching my laptop, a vacant look to my eyes and a glass of wine in my hand.

I just had this niggling feeling in the back of my head that I was forgetting something major, like my birthday or--


 See? I wasn't wrong! It says 11/18/11. THEY fucked up...

Clearly, I fell into a wormhole last night. Or was captured by aliens or something because I. Can't. Believe. I. Totally. Forgot.

I win at failing. Obviously. In my defense, I'm an insanely selfish, self-centered twat-knuckle and more than likely just assumed that the first premiere of Breaking Dawn would be the one I'm going to in about 48 hours because I'm that important. I believe this is called Delusions of Grandeur or something.

Or I was insanely jealous of all our wonderful peeps who braved tent city for five freaking days AND got their pictures taken with the precious AND got to see the fucking movie last night.

I can't decide if this is utter devotion or pure insanity. All I know is that I kind of wish I had been there, so I'm going for a little bit of both. 

Anyway. Breaking Dawn premiered last night and apparently everyone was all gorgeous and glittery and smile-y (especially Taylor Lautner with his blindingly white teeth) and I'm sure everyone had a great time and I totally bet KStew only wore her heels for 32 seconds before she said "fuck it" and put on sneakers.

 I was going to make a crack about his teeth but then I noticed he was trying to grow a big-boy mustache. How precious.

Speaking of the Precious:

Dear god is she a lucky woman. (Go here for TONS more pics)

Pure beauty. Unrivaled perfection. Just... gorgeous. Oh, and KStew looks beautiful in her fancypants dress too.

Dayum. That slit is scandalous. The one in the dress, I mean. Not...never mind...

 I was right!!! FINALLY!!!

My kind of gal.

I've never been to a "real" premiere but I did watch a few videos and think I would be totally overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of something like this. All the flashy-flash of the photographers (none would be directed at me, of course), the security and stern looking security/bodyguards (I suspect those glares would be directed at me) and all that hoopla has to be insane. 

Let's not forget the screaming, either. If you've ever been in a room full of women screaming, you'll know it's virtually impossible to forget.

There are a ton of pictures and videos (go to Thinking of Rob for videos, there are a shit-ton of them) floating around the interwebs today and I have to say that in every single one I've seen thus far, RPattz and The Stew look like they're actually enjoying themselves, which is nice. They seemed to be signing a million autographs and being super friendly with the fans.

More importantly, we want to here from YOU. We know there were quite a few of you ladies at the premiere, camping out, etc. and we would love to hear your stories. Please feel free to leave your Rob-sighting experiences in the comments, or link to your own blogs. Or come do a guest post for us!

One thing - please DON'T give away any spoilers. I think we here at Twitarded have more or less decided we're going virgin for the next few days until we see the movies ourselves and I imagine a lot of our readers will be doing the same. Oh, and since we've already mentioned guest bloggers, stay in tune in tomorrow for TwiKiwi's spoiler-free review!!


  1. Thanks JJ!

    JMFHF I am so fucking excited. I will be leaving for the cinema in seven hours (aka an eternity) to see the midnight screening here in Auckland, New Zealand.

    Then I'll race back home and jump on my laptop to pen my spoiler-free review.

    BUT - spoilerh00rs don't panic - there will also be a SPOILERIFIC version over on my blog too.


  2. Holy fucking hell I seriously cant get over how hot rob and kristin looked. I MEAN EVEN AT MY TINY ASS THINNEST i could never have rocked THAT slit. And lets just be honest, that was why Rob was all smiles!

  3. Trench crawlers rule!!! We scored tickets to the BD prem in LA yesterday! Myself, @AGirlintheSouth, @Dangerdafne & @Donnawhodoesnottweet managed to trench crawl our way in.

    We arrived into LA on Sat, walked to tent city, got our wristbands and ended up on the bleachers facing the red carpet (even if it was black). It was a perfect spot, all the stars hit our cage first and we finally got a photo with Rob.

    Then they started handing out tickets to the film. I managed to get my grubby hands on four and in we went. We had to hand in our phones and cameras, which was painful, and then grabbed the Breaking Dawn freebie popcorn filled cups and drinks and girlie squealed our way to our seats.

    It was a huge venue and all the stars were walking into the building right where we were. They also walked past us to get to their seats. The best star who entered last, tripped on his way up to get to his seat in the darkness....yep, it was Rob - he even high fived @AGirlintheSouth who suddenly had developed a raging, rabbie like fangirl persona.

    The film is fabulous!!! The end. I will say something though, it is not for those with young children. My daughter, who is soon to be ten, asked if she could see it and after watching it, she won't be.

    There is loads more to tell and I know we were lucky. In
    all honesty, you don't need to camp in order to obtain a decent viewing spot. If I was ever to return for the final partee, I would aim for the bleachers again (I said again, I hope AGITS doesn't read this)

    P.s towards the end of the film, at a quiet spot in the film, a male voice shouted out "Taylor is one fucking hawt dude" and the entire place giggled.

  4. *Wildly raises hand and waves it around* I was one of those crazy hobo tent dwellers along with 17foreverLisa, ZAnyMouse, Twifixx, the Twi-daughters, Mama_Cougar, TatooMickey, and whole bunch of other friends and it was one of the best 5 days EVER!

    My #1 goal was to get a picture with Rob and I still can't believe it happened. He is inhumanly gorgeous and sexy as hell up close! The movie was beautiful, funny, intense, and totally fabulous!! I can't wait to read JennyJerkface's review cause there were a few places that Twi-daughter Nicole and I inappropriately laughed and I'm dying to hear her take on it. Overall, it captures all the best parts of the book and I was very very happy with it!

    My brain is still too foggy to put two thoughts together, but I'll post my stories and pictures over at www.TwiBite.blogspot.com very soon.


    Thanks Ladies for sharing your adventures!

    I will be waiting in line in either snow or rain. Probably both because it is winter here. Really? We need a summer release scummit! The high will be 40 with snow and the low will be 24, YAY!

  6. After watching all of the tent-city action for a couple of films now I feel the same way. I'm not sure if they're crazy or devoted, but I kind of wish I was there.

    And what's up with the tennis shoes? Did she change from the beautiful pumps to the god-awful sneakers 1/2 way through or something?

  7. I think she got there in sneaks and THEN changed into awesome, fabulous fuck-me shoes - LOVE those! Not as much as I flove her arm candy, but still... Hey RPatts, I have shoes just like that... j/s...

    Can't wait to see this tomorrow - SQUEEE!!!

  8. Just 2 days away from BedWard and I cannot fucking focus on real life.

    When I bought my advanced tickets for the midnite preview, I asked the cashier what to expect. She said, and I quote, "mostly women your age....and lots of audible sighs, maybe a few squeals.". LMFAO!

    I gotta give The Stew props on a Fuckawesome dress choice. The Precious is, as always, a slice of heaven with a scoop of hotness on top. Yum!

    How the fuck am I expected to work the next two days? Should not a national holiday have been declared?!?

  9. I think (for once) we as a fandom have not been bombarded by spoilers. Sure, there were those leaked honeymoon pix, but besides that, the studio seems to have held back the spoiler-ish trailers for once. Thank god!

  10. Oh, those poor B listers trying to gain some leftover love from us Twitards. It's sad really.

    Did you guys see the bewildered look on Nikki Reeds new hubby. It was hillarious.

  11. When Kristen walked by the bleachers she was in sneakers - don't know if that is before or after the heels - I am guessing after. She is breathtaking in person. She was so humble and grateful to everyone. I wish I could have gotten her to sign Mrs. P's avi but alas it was not to be... this time.

    BUT I did manage to score Rob's on Mrs. P's avi and I screamed so loud after I turned away from him. I have been dreaming of that moment as long as I can remember and it was amazing to have it all come to fruition right in front of me at the premiere.

    I will be back and I will most likely tent it. If only to see my friends.

    I did miss Stephenie by an hour - I was at the airport arriving while she was in tent city BUT @laxplays took us to a party and @AGirlintheSouth so kindly made sure my name ended up in the raffle cup and I won Stephenie's autograph!!! Woot!!!

    I had an amazing time and I must say that the whole trip is in my top 5 trips I have even done in my life. Just amazing and thanks to three amazing women too for hanging out with me for the weekend. Any time you need a fourth traveler, give me a call :)


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