Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Beautiful Bastard is out today!

Cross-posted at Blogwaffles, too!

Guess what's out in stores today, people?
WTF is he doing with his sleeve and why can't I stop staring at it? Because UNGF.
That's right, the original Ficward, Beautiful Bastard, is here! In a real, live legal book that you can go buy and hold in your hands and everything! In fact, you should go buy it right now!

Or, walk right into your local book store and buy it there!

Seriously, folks, back in 2010 when I first got to the Twilight fandom, I never would have fathomed the day when all these fan fiction stories would be making actual paid writers out of fic authors. But it happened. Boy, did it happen. And now, here we are with our very own Beautiful Bastard out in stores today.

I think many of you reading this have read the original fic The Office by Tby789, back when it was around. For those of you who haven't read it and are curious about Beautiful Bastard, I can sum it up like this:

A strong young woman works for a gorgeous asshole at a big corporate firm. They can't stand each other, but they are desperately attracted to one another. A lot of fucking happens, but not just your run-of-the-mill wanky, boring amateurish fucking. Oh no, no, no.

Think of it this way--have you ever been super pissed off at your significant other, and then you get into a wicked argument and in the  middle of it think, "God damn, he (or she, as the case may be,) is so hot when he's angry?" And then you end up having sex on the kitchen table, in spite of how pissed off you are? And then when it's over, you're all, "Damn, I can't believe I just had sex with you, you bastard--I'm still pissed off that you put the potato masher in the wrong drawer. You don't live here all by yourself, you know."

Wait, that doesn't happen to you? It's just me? Hmm.

Well, it doesn't matter, because Beautiful Bastard is much hotter than that, and there are no potato mashers involved. Anywhere.
potatoe masher
This object does not appear anywhere in Beautiful Bastard.

Lots of writers write sex scenes. Fic writers write lemons. We all love a good lemon, right? Well, the thing that made Christina and Lauren such well-loved authors of fic is that those two can REALLY write sex scenes. And believe it or not, all that fantasy-indulging sex has a purpose--a point. Not just to titillate you, dear readers. There's a story here, between two strong-willed characters who find each other, fuck each other, and come to love each other in spite of themselves. But this ain't no schmaltzy two-bit romance, either. It's smart. It's funny. It indulges all the right emotional fantasies as well as the sexual ones. It's tongue-in-cheek, and it's tongue in other better places as well.

What I'm saying is, it's all that and a trip to the La Perla dressing room.

For those of you who have read The Office, let me tell you, Beautiful Bastard does a masterful job of keeping the spirit of The Office alive and well, yet it also updates and polishes it in ways that you'll definitely appreciate. It's been revised so there are plenty of new things to discover. The writing is as smart as ever and it's still funny. There are parts of this where you're going to literally LOL right before you gasp at how smutty something is, so don't read it at work. Okay, you can read it at work if you work from home or in the adult industry.

But trust me when I say, you will want to read it. Over and over again.

Tell me in the comments, did you order your copy of Beautiful Bastard yet? Did you read it? What other fic-turned-books have you read? What are you hoping makes the leap next?

Talk to me, people.