So let's talk about page 170 of Twilight... can everyone please take out your books and turn to that page (I'll wait). What has Stephenie Meyer dressed Edward in for the famous restaurant scene? A spiffy button-down and a bad-ass coat? Ummm... no. Edward is sporting a light beige leather jacket (a color that reminds me slightly of binge drinking vomit on an empty stomach) and an ivory turtleneck sweater. Wha wha what? And ivory turtleneck sweater? Why have I never noticed this before? Whose fucking bright idea was it to dress a pasty white vampire in light beige and ivory? That is not a good color palate... at all! For anyone! Furthermore, hot boys do NOT wear that kind of crap unless they're planning on being out at sea. And then why wouldn't she just call it a Fisherman's sweater or something much cooler sounding. Boys should not wear turtleneck or boat neck sweaters. Seriously.
You all know how much I hate this coat, right? I'd rather see him in this coat, then that thing SM describes in the book. Ugh!
And this brings me back to the whole Edward-not-being-that-scary point... I think his pretentious little custom-made peacoat is just a tad fucking scarier than the booze-puke leather jacket. Just trying to picture it in my head is giving me baaaaad 80's flashbacks - I bet it looks very similar to, oh, say a fucking Member's Only jacket. Or even worse, the 70's style blazer-type leather jacket... Please say it isn't so! Oh gawd, now I'm going to hurl.
One of my biggest pet peeves is that the outfits in the movie were so incredibly different from the book. Stephenie always made such a fucking huge point about how much Edward loved Bella in blue. So why the fuck couldn't they just put her in a gadamn blue shirt when she visits the Cullen house for the first time? I mean it doesn't have to be the fugly blouse she describes because honestly, my grandmother wears blouses... 17 year old girls do not. But just a blue shirt... a blue thermal or bowling shirt or whatever the hell Bella wears. Just make it fucking blue people.
I know this point has been brought up a lot so I felt the need to rush ahead to the infamous meadow scene and well, now I'm sorry I did. What the fuckity fuck is going on in that head of Stephenie Meyer? What is Edward wearing when he picks Bella up... a light tan sweater! Get the fuck off the neutral color palate, please... for the love of Edward, give that pallid kid some color in his wardrobe.
Honestly, would this scene have had the same effect on your lady bits had Edward been sporting a fucking beige sweater? I'm going with no, no it wouldn't.
Seriously, I nearly shit a brick when Edward finally stripped off the sweater. Oh how I was looking forward to a nice, fitted white t-shirt... one that shows off his nice build. Or better yet, some naked skin. But oh nooooo... he's wearing a fucking. sleeveless. shirt. What year did she write this book? 1989? Normal teenage boys do NOT, I repeat, do NOT wear sleeveless shirts. And frankly, I'm creeped out by dudes with no sleeves. It just screams redneck, or serial killer. {{shivers}}
Is this Edward's shirt? Ah my eyes, my eeeeeeeeyes! I'd have broken up with him on the spot. Just kidding. I'd have stripped him naked on the spot and burned that fucking shirt.
I'm sure I'm missing some pretty gawd awful outfits because for fuck's sake, I'm only halfway through the first book and I've already thrown up in my mouth numerous times at the wardrobe. Why can't Edward just be naked all the time? That would make us all so happy. And wet. But alas, he's not.
LMAO - the sleeveless shirt always baffled me. I had to reread that part a few times to make sure I had understood. Maybe it should have been a wife-beater - since Edward's so ripped in the books, I bet he'd fill one out nicely... excuse me, I've distracted myself with that image and can no loner type...
ReplyDeleteHa ha
ReplyDeleteahhhhh...Mormons! (so adorable)
Well I've also said hot guys don't drive hatchbacks *cough Volvo C30 cough* but they didn't listen to me either. Who knows wtf SM was thinking when she pictured his wardrobe maybe she was having acid flashbacks? I think maybe they picked her brain a little too hard when they made New Moon as well because with the exception of Edward's "at school outfit" he looked like he had been raiding grandpa's closet. And oh gawd don't even get me started on Rob's brown bubble jacket *gag* I see that shiteous thing is still alive and well this past week in Vancouver I was hoping he'd lost that thing by now but you're right if you're picturing the puke leather jacket the way I am I'd rather see the BBJ live on.
ReplyDeleteThis leather jacket says it all.
ReplyDeletehttp://twitpic.com/1kh9r6
Hey Bella! How you doin?
LOL - I was just having this long debated discussion yesterday with a ff author who wrote it much better than SM. I admit it... I am actually okay with the tans and whites (as in khaki pants and white LONG SLEEVE button downs - not ivory sweaters and light beige leather jackets) I even think Edward is cute the super awkward and odd 'vision' in NM. *hangs head in shame* But that sleeveless abomination *snickers*...I didn't even catch that until the 2nd reading. My mind must have been trying to protect me...
ReplyDeleteHeh. What about Bella's long khaki skirt? That gets mentioned multiple times, possibly across multiple books. Also, she wanted to wear it with the red blouse that Riley stole - can you say 'Christmas tree'?
ReplyDeleteI can understand why Bella always wears blouses - I think it fits in with the whole middle-aged thing she has going on, but I definitely cringed when I read about Edward's sleeveless shirt. Ew.
hahaha - I thought the SAME things, I still do and just make up my own outfits now that aren't ugly. Stephanie is like obsessed with browns and golds on everyone and everything - barf. I also wondered why Alice was always putting Bella, the most uncoordinated person in the history of people, in stilettos... especially at the prom when she's got her other foot in a freaking cast... aren't they friends? Or does Alice just secretly like watching Bella struggle with walking at all not just most of the time.
ReplyDeleteThe clothes are definitely a fail in the books. Oh, and the movies.
ReplyDelete@norevoli - I remember reading about the long khaki skirt and thinking "what the hell is wrong with this chick?" I mean, what teenage girl thinks that a long khaki skirt is a good choice?
agreed! i have been ranting and raving since my first read-through of twilight (years, we're talkin') about the SLEEVELESS SHIRT!! who is he? Larry, the cable guy? Come on Bella! Get'r done, spider monkey! FOR FUCKS SAKE!!! definitely one thing i am very glad they broke away from canon for.
ReplyDeletethe way i justify it in my head is that people often get things like that wrong. women often say sleeveless when they mean strapless and such. so i'll just hope that smeyer meant short-sleeves or something slightly less vomit-inducing and her editor was just as clueless as her.
one thing i will disagree with you on is the peacoat. i love the peacoat. i lick the screen when he's in that peacoat.
i wonder if smeyer did more than consulting on just story/direction during the first few films. i wonder if she added her two cents to the wardrobe as well... not her forte obviously. one awesome idea *imho* would be for them to hire a guest designer for the wardrobe for BD. someone with a very recognizable name that understands current fashion - someone that Alice would approve of, for instance. no more old man tweed!! it could add well to the marketing and merchandising of the film while giving us a fucking break on the visuals.
BTW, lady latchkey, just wanted to tell you that i am loving your posts! another hilarious hoor adding brilliance to my beloved twitardia! xoxo
It must be a Mormon thing. I didn't think of it much when I read the books the first couple times, but when my bf read them (Love you. So much.), he kept bringing it up. And it was even more hilarious b/c he said the following...*general gist b/c it was last year*
ReplyDeleteThe Bentist: "Why the hell is she putting a pale man in cream and tan? Is she trying to make him look even more obvious?"
Me: "Huh? Show me." *shows me* "Um, idk. Never really paid attention. Sounds kinda douch-y though."
TB: "That's the kind of thing the Mormon's wear at the dental school. We're pretty sure they only wear earth tones."
Me: "Bwah hahahaha, did you know SM was Mormon?"
TB: "Huh. So that means they aren't gonna have sex."
Me: "Funny you should say that..."
So I'm doing some research, trying to see if I can find a good looking outfit that fits the description, and I find this. But I was thinking he would be wearing something along these lines. Without the blackness of course. But whatevs.
And as for the sleeveless shirt...this is what I saw. Which made me want to lick his shoulders in my mind. So that works for me.
you have a problem with Edward sleeveless..... Exhibit A
ReplyDeletehttp://www.twitpic.com/1khh5o
Thank goodness a new post!! LOL every time I went to check for new bloggie posts, I had to look at that dumb b's grumpy in the toilet! Love u ladies, hate the Saga's clothing choices!!
ReplyDeleteLindsey Ray your Cullen sweater is perfect! Just what I imagined! I prefer my sleeveless pic though....
ReplyDeleteAs for the leather jacket... what about something like this slightly lighter? Not perfect but....
http://www.ioffer.com/img/item/120/735/835/o_gR39NcYL5tJBK8f.jpg
I get through my readings of the books just changing the fashions to suit my taste.
However... I have NEVER been able to picture that khaki skirt in any way that could possibly be considered attractive. Why oh why?!?!?!
There's nothing at all wrong with sleeveless per se -- it's the sleeveless BUTTONDOWN that is totally ridic. I missed it the first time I read it, too. And then the second time I read it, I was like *screeeeech*...back that truck up...say WHA??? In what decade would Edward *not* have looked like a complete dork in something like that?
ReplyDeleteOf course, this is Stephenie Meyers. She who, on her very own website, included these incredible images of her vision of Bella's and Alice's prom dresses:
http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/twilight_faq.html#dress
Yeah. That's her taste, all right. I rest my case.
Sorry...Stephenie Meyer. I swear my brain refuses to get her name right, for some reason. Probably resentment. Yeah, I'm totally going with resentment. I'm still pissed about Midnight Sun, that's what it is. But I'm justified, amiright?!
ReplyDeleteLOL! The tan leather vomit jacket!In my head I always went to a place of Andy Gibb and the BeeGees there! No wonder Bella didn't want to wear his leather jacket to school the next day!
ReplyDeleteSM once said that she specifically dressed them in light colors so it would be less contrast with their skin. That being said, I can never EVER forgive the sleevless shirt in the meadow scene.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI'm shaking because I'm laughing so hard right now. That usually means that yes I agree with the above post!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad someone decided to talk about this because the VERY first time I read Twilight when Bella grabs her drab ass khaki (KHAKI?!) skirt and blue blouse, I wanted to throw the book. I was so repulsed that I made it look like a bad ass outfit in my mind just so my head wouldn't implode form the dorkiness from it.
hypovag... I am ROTFL at your twitpic address.... hysterical!!!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSo a few sentences in and I wonder if you're going to bring up "the blue blouse" or the "sleeveless collared shirt"...You did not let me down. Those two items bothered me the most...and you couldn't have said it better...who the FUCK wears a blouse? My Grandma wears em'...AND Edwards shirt....CREEPY! It almost ruined the hiking scene for me...speaking of the hiking scene...check out my new post!
ReplyDeletexoxo J
I can't remember the specific address, but Cleolinda (she writes Twilight Movie in 15 Minutes... Hilarious!!!) has summaries of all the books on her blog. She echos our sentiments about the clothes. And I think we would all appreciate her summary/commentary of Breaking Dawn. Seriously. Google her.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHoly hell. Since my very first reading of the Twilight saga, when I still thought it was "like, the lamest thing ever," (That's me quoting myself, circa 2008) I came across the white sleeveless buttondown and I'm pretty sure I said aloud, "Oh no she did NOT!" I hated it so much, I told myself that Edward was not, in fact, wearing this (or the damn beige coat or whatever, seriously SM, what the fuck is wrong with you), and I blocked it out of my mind entirely. So much so that when I went back to read Twilight again, I was totally astonished once again by the inappropriateness of said article of clothing. I hate that choice more than anything else in the entire saga except for maybe Renesmee. I hate it more than the khaki skirt (can I just say that when I was 17 the only khaki skirt I had probably JUST covered my ass), I hate it more than all of Bella's goddamn blouses, I hate it more than Alice's weird cutout dress, I hate it more than the high-necked wedding dress (high necked?! HIGH NECKED?!)...
ReplyDeleteOf course, the only reason I get so upset about this shit is because I love it so fucking much.
In any case, @Lindsay Rae, I like your sleeveless version MUCH better.
@Cupcake Donna, your "Aaaahhh... Mormons! (So adorable)" pretty much sent me over the edge and I may have actually pissed myself.
And @ Hypovag, they're SO onto you!
Goodnight, h00rs!!!
Definately in the same boat with you on the clothes in the book. I was a bit flabbergasted at the descriptions of Edward's wardrobe. I don't get all the khaki pants. I mean they were popular in high schools in the late 90's, but not now. So I don't get why Alice would let him have an unending supply of them.
ReplyDeleteLOL I've always questioned SM's taste or rather how out of touch she was with teenagers in 2005 (another thing that always peeved me was that Bella cooked! A teenage girl cooked!? sorry that just doesn't happen, but I digress)... the sleeveless shirt, gold carpeting, describing bella's engagement ring... alice's prom dress...the taste is very very questionable all along...and look where it lead us in the end.....
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteoh oh oh what about Alice in the red leather pants and silver sparkly boobtube at the graduation party!!! I am DYING to see Eclipse just to see if they did that piece of sartorial splendour correctly!
ReplyDelete(@Hypovag - I am still laughing that twitpic caught you out)
Sorry, me again - I know I'm commenting a lot today!
ReplyDelete@hypovag... I just opened your link!!! Now everyone at work thinks I'm crazy because I burst out laughing so loud!!
Look at the bright side. At least he's not wearing Speedos and black socks with sandals.
ReplyDeleteOhmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod, @ Pam R, I decided to check out Cleolinda and I am crying. Absolutely crying because I am laughing so hard.
ReplyDeleteFURSPLODE!!!
@HypoVag: Pardon me while I vomit all over the golf course cum meadow deco. hehe...cum. I choked on my ice cream when I saw the pic. Right the fuck on, bb. Right.thefuck.ON.
ReplyDelete@Hypovag - may have just actually clapped my hands in delight when I saw your twitpic.
ReplyDeleteI remember thinking all these things about SM's clothing choices every time I read the books....I would just change them in my head. Kind of like I would change 'chuckles' everytime in my head too. In fact, I think my brain became a freaking search engine for better-fitting visuals and words while reading the series. Alas, we all still love it....and it spawns great blogging material.
ReplyDeleteBTW 'beige' 'tan' and 'blouse' do not even exist in my fashion vocabulary.
Not sure if anyone pointed this out cause I only read half the posts but...
ReplyDelete...dark colors can make pale folks look paler. So, to combat that, it's actually best to go with lighter colors. That's why in the film versions, everyone is in dark colors...so they look paler.
CH explains the costume color choices in the directors notebook and on the Target Twilight three disk DVD.
Bella is POOR. Ergo the khaki skirt being the dressiest thing she has and something she wears repeatedly. Her entire wardrobe fit in one or two suitcases and from the action in the books, she never adds to it.
Alice looked like total shit in NM. It's like a closet puked on her. comparatively, everyone else looked awesome.
I didn't imagine the sleeves on the white sleeveless shirt to have been ripped off. I figured the shrit was originally made without sleeves. sounds a wee bit "gay," but not red necky.
i just pretend that i havnt read the part in which she describes his clothes and i just re dress him myself. and that green shirt they put her in in the cafeteria scene allways makes me want to physically hurl.
ReplyDelete@VitaminR I totally agree about some of the ill-fitting words - like when Edward constantly says 'love' at the end of a sentence directed at Bella, especialy in BD. That so got on my tits!!!!! Here in the UK calling somebody 'love' is pretty derogatory (think, "Alright luv!", "OK, pet!") - grrrrrrrr, is all I want to say!!!!!
ReplyDeleteCupcake Donna said it all! ha! I have a feeling SM's mind is much cleaner than any of ours.
ReplyDeleteI also asked myself WTF? when I read about the white sleeveless button down shirt. I don't think I've ever seen such a thing on a man.
ReplyDeleteBut, to me, Edward was just so beautiful that you could have covered him in fresh dog shit and he would still be fuckable! So, I just said "Hmm. I guess you have to see that to understand." and I went with it.
I loved the peacoat. I loved the tweed. I did. But really. . . . Did these people even read the books? Bella is almost always dressed in ratty sweats and a tee shirt or sweat shirt. I've read all the books 9 times already, and I'm quite sure NOWHERE do they say Bella wore super low-rise jeans, or those tops with the spaghetti straps (and no bra) [sorry - everybody wears them, but I don't know what they are called], or blouses with the top three buttons unbuttoned! NO WHERE! I think they really skanked her up for the movies.
And they should back off on that shit, because they are going to need to save that for her magical transformation in Breaking Dawn. Just saying' . . . .
OMG...The long khaki skirt kills me....do they only have Old Navy circa 1988 in Forks?
ReplyDeleteAlso the fact that SM brought it back in Eclipse to pair with a red blouse instead of the blue one from Twilight. Did I miss something? When did Bella pick up a shift at Target?
(I used to work at Target in high school so I will never think it is a good idea to wear red and khaki together again...not that I thought it was such a hot idea back in 1996 either)
Crap and the sleeveless shirts...never on a guy unless he is sporting a mullet and a 40 oz of generic domestic beer.
ZOMFG! are u guys kidding me? grown women not only discussing what wardrobe choices work best for a fucking fictional character, but posting links of said better choices?
ReplyDeleteonly edward cullen, nee robert pattinson, could have this effect. the full PRECIOUS EFFECT. gah.
srsly - go back and read the comments. FUCKING CLASSIC TWITARDISM. *smirk*
here, let me make your wet dreams cum true. aaaandd magic in 3...2...1..
http://www.stardoll.com/en/dolls.php?id=1299
vw: chante i chante look away from edward's cream sweater, cuz let's face it - it's edward fucking cullen.
Oh for fuck's sake, I totally forgot about that stupid ass khaki skirt. I hate that thing... I bet it's long and straight and she wears some orthotic-ish brown loafers with it. Gah! I can just picture the wardrobes from that HBO show Big Love!!
ReplyDelete@Jenifer - I have to agree with you - I love a guy in khakis and a while LONG SLEEVE button down. It must have fucking sleeves!!
@HypoVag - That fucking twitpic of sleeveless Edward made me almost pee my pants. I wish I had that for the post, that would have been a total win!
@VitR - I'm totally going to start making up my own wardrobe in the books. Maybe I'll add little sticky notes to those pages. Instead of an ivory turtleneck sweater and beige leather jacket (vomit, vomit) - Edward was wearing nothing. He's completely naked and the light in the restaurant bounced off his sparkly cock! I know, I know, it's only the sun but a girl can dream, right?
@mel in the atl - I will NEVER pair red and khaki together again in all my life, thank you very much! LOL! (Not that I wore a lot of that color combination to begin with but now I'll just think Target, Target, Target!!)
@neverthink - Is it wrong that I tried to take off his boxer briefs?
ReplyDelete@hippovag - meadow ensemble. yeah, i'd tap that ass. *bliss*
ReplyDeleteaaaand the oscar for wardrobe that-captures-the-fuckhawtness-that-is-edward-cullen goes to...hyposewingmistrissvagina.
vw: phistm.
ReplyDeletei shit you not. that is all.
LKW: I agree wholehearted with everything- except for the turtleneck... (yea- the color hideous on a vamp) however- the right guy in a turtleneck sweater cough-Kellan-cough is hawt.
ReplyDelete@ apotampkin is that a sweater vest? or did he push his sleeves up? (and there are no buttons. sleeveless w/buttons = trashy)
@The Rugbymom 'fresh dog shit'- jeebus woman.. hilarious.
I can die happy knowing I'm not the only one who ass-clenched over what SM pretty much described as a sleeveless white dress shirt from Land's End.
ReplyDelete'Scuse. Feeling pukey again...
@neverthink - where the hell do you find this shit! There's even a poop brown jacket to put him in!!
ReplyDelete@LatchKey - I TRIED TOO!!
@hypovag - Meadow Picture - WIN!!!
as much as i agree with you (when i picture edward in khakis, i wanna roll my eyes or gag. or both), i'm gonna bitch about something a bit different but still clothing related.
ReplyDeletei liked that bella and charlie weren't so well off in the books. their dining room chairs don't even match. her room is quaint. with a quilt on her bed that her gran made and yellow curtains. that said, i also loved that she was a tomboy who didn't care much for being stylish.
my biggest gripe: her pajamas. she is described as wearing ratty tees and sweats, which i can relate to. whereas, the in the movie, she's wearing an tightly fitted tank top and barely there boy shorts i.e. underwear. i like that book bella is a normal girl and not a fashionably aware sex kitten. the best part is that edward loves her anyway. perhaps even because of this aspect of her personality.
This is really fucking funny. I have only read the series twice, but I have NEVER noticed the sleeveless shirt in the meadow thing. LMFAO! That's awful. I'm guessing my subconscious just couldn't handle it and blocked it. Re: the Khaki skirt, I noticed that because on my first read through I borrowed the books from a friend who was raised Mormon and she was all about pointing out Bella's Mormon clothes through the whole thing.
ReplyDelete@Vitamin R I change "chuckles" in my head, too!!
You know I lurve you, LKW, but I must disagree. I have always adored the whites and light colors on the Cullens. When they first entered the cafeteria, I was blown away with their clothing. The point is that they're not gothic vampires. They don't hang from the tops of buildings and lament at how difficult life is. They (or Alice) like happy colors and whenever I see them in dark blues and blacks, I have to stop myself from grinding my teeth together.
ReplyDeleteOh, and the poofy leather jacket -- Um, WTF RPattz? Who gave that thing back to him? For god's sake, can't someone talk his sisters into stealing that POS away? It reminds me of that top layer on a brownie. You know, how it's all shiny and crunchy....
HAHAHAHA I am LMAO at your comments. Hate the freaking KHAKI long skirt and yes I also picture the blonde chick from Big Love ;) I have always re-dressed them in my mind when I read these books but . .maybe . . their craptastic fashion sense is something they have in common?! Part of what brings them together! WTF SM - I guess the mormons really DO live in their own little badly dresssed world.
ReplyDeleteI am going to seriously start wearing a effn' diaper...you guys. I too redress them...That stupid white sleeveless shirt...OMGWTFBBQ? I may even just re-type and paste my own clothing choices in the book.
ReplyDeleteVeriword-----Dammit! I do need a diaper its...chickp!!!!!
Honestly, I love your pet peeves about the book because they mimic mine. I loathe with an unnatural hatred that ugly ass beige coat and fucking "ivory" sweater. WTF? I understand that the Cullens, especially Edward, could be sporting mullets and a Hefty bag, and still look like a Greek God, but come on Steph! Could she have made him sound like more of a pretentious pussy? What sky rocketed me right into fan girl status was his famous cafeteria scene. The black shirt, wrist band and black jeans. Good God, man, just kill me now! My ladie bits awoke with a vengence!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete@ Amanda - I know! Temp of a hundred and werewolf!
ReplyDeleteOh, this blog post is so timely for muah. I'm on page 322 of Twilight now, only my second time around - it's my first anniversary of popping my Twi-cherry.
ReplyDeleteANYWAY, I too keep getting hung up on the goddamn outfits! Maybe the first time around I was on a mission - find the sex, find the sex -- that I missed all the ridonculous outfits!
First - when Edward picked Bella up to go to the meadow, he was wearing a white button down UNDER the tan sweater -- ANNNNNND, Bella matched him! WTF is S.M. putting Bella in? I thought she was already supposed to be so plain Jane that she blended into the ground. She has to put her in a tan sweater with a white shirt underneath?
The sleeveless part of Edward's shirt was laughable. It was like having the most amazing fantasy midday and then your husband comes into the room and tries to talk about folding the laundry piling up on the bed upstairs. It infairly jolts you out of your zone - prematurely. That's how it was when the sleeveless shirt made it's entry.
ANNNND, I'm at the part where Bella is going to meet the Cullens and she's wearing - wait for it - a LONG KHAKI SKIRT AND A FREAKING BUTTTON DOWN BLOUSE! What, is she freaking Amish? How about we thrown on a bonnet for good measure?
Oh, that turtleneck sweater is so embarrassing. I felt like I was reading a book written in '95. Good thing it wasn't a mock-T . I absolutely hate reading any book in which the detailed fashions give away the year the book was writen.
The worst, in True Blood, there was talk of Sookie wearing "scrunchies". O-MIGAWD.
You ask if the lady parts would have responded the same to Edward walking in in a beige sweater. You thought not, but I'm curious...didn't you see the Vanity Fair photos with RPatz in that damn beige cableknit sweater? I think the lake he's standing in front of was caused by the ladies and their parts when they saw him in that damn sweater. I'm drooling just thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteLatchkey Wife, your post made me double over in laughter 'til it killed my sides! I needed that!!!!!
ReplyDeleteOh Wow Latchkey Wife this post had me almost pissing myself laughing.
ReplyDeleteI pay alot to descriptions in books - it's one of the reasons I love twilight I think Steph Meyer spent alot of time describing things and to me that's a good thing...unfortunately sometimes what she's describing isn't err what I exactly want it to be like. I actually never realised how bad the restaurant outfit was...y the hell did she put him in white? does she want to make him look like a ghost? why not jsut get him to start floating and have done with it?
I know absolutely what you're talking about with the sleeveless shirt. I remember the first time I read twilight I was like 'lalalala ooo he's removed his swe- WTF?! Sleeveless shirt? really? really really? but...but that isn't hot that's just fugly" I can honestly say I spent about 5 minutes - where I put down the book - and closed my eyes and tried to imagine the fugly thing on the Pret-ay but honestly? I ended up having to add sleeves to that mofo coz well this book ain't set in 1989.
Oh God, this shit is too funny! You must find me more fuck ugly outfits, you just must!! LMFAO
ReplyDeleteI also asked myself WTF? when I read about the white sleeveless button down shirt. I don't think I've ever seen such a thing on a man.
ReplyDeleteBut, to me, Edward was just so beautiful that you could have covered him in fresh dog shit and he would still be fuckable! So, I just said "Hmm. I guess you have to see that to understand." and I went with it.
I loved the peacoat. I loved the tweed. I did. But really. . . . Did these people even read the books? Bella is almost always dressed in ratty sweats and a tee shirt or sweat shirt. I've read all the books 9 times already, and I'm quite sure NOWHERE do they say Bella wore super low-rise jeans, or those tops with the spaghetti straps (and no bra) [sorry - everybody wears them, but I don't know what they are called], or blouses with the top three buttons unbuttoned! NO WHERE! I think they really skanked her up for the movies.
And they should back off on that shit, because they are going to need to save that for her magical transformation in Breaking Dawn. Just saying' . . . .
Look at the bright side. At least he's not wearing Speedos and black socks with sandals.
ReplyDeleteHoly hell. Since my very first reading of the Twilight saga, when I still thought it was "like, the lamest thing ever," (That's me quoting myself, circa 2008) I came across the white sleeveless buttondown and I'm pretty sure I said aloud, "Oh no she did NOT!" I hated it so much, I told myself that Edward was not, in fact, wearing this (or the damn beige coat or whatever, seriously SM, what the fuck is wrong with you), and I blocked it out of my mind entirely. So much so that when I went back to read Twilight again, I was totally astonished once again by the inappropriateness of said article of clothing. I hate that choice more than anything else in the entire saga except for maybe Renesmee. I hate it more than the khaki skirt (can I just say that when I was 17 the only khaki skirt I had probably JUST covered my ass), I hate it more than all of Bella's goddamn blouses, I hate it more than Alice's weird cutout dress, I hate it more than the high-necked wedding dress (high necked?! HIGH NECKED?!)...
ReplyDeleteOf course, the only reason I get so upset about this shit is because I love it so fucking much.
In any case, @Lindsay Rae, I like your sleeveless version MUCH better.
@Cupcake Donna, your "Aaaahhh... Mormons! (So adorable)" pretty much sent me over the edge and I may have actually pissed myself.
And @ Hypovag, they're SO onto you!
Goodnight, h00rs!!!
Sorry, me again - I know I'm commenting a lot today!
ReplyDelete@hypovag... I just opened your link!!! Now everyone at work thinks I'm crazy because I burst out laughing so loud!!
Rob arriving on set (in costume!)for recent reshoots of the Meadow scene.
ReplyDeletehttp://twitpic.com/1kittr
I can't remember the specific address, but Cleolinda (she writes Twilight Movie in 15 Minutes... Hilarious!!!) has summaries of all the books on her blog. She echos our sentiments about the clothes. And I think we would all appreciate her summary/commentary of Breaking Dawn. Seriously. Google her.
ReplyDelete