Showing posts with label 15 Step. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 15 Step. Show all posts

Sunday, December 20, 2009

15 Step - Chapter 10 - Puny Human (Twilight Fan Fiction)

Hai there! I know it's taken me FOREVER to update this fic and I do apologize. Real life has been fucking with me these days.

Anyhoo - just the usual reminders. I don't own these characters, I just like to fuck with them. And occasionally have them fuck each other.

This story contains strong language, sex, drugs, violence and Rock N Roll. Though not necessarily in every chapter. 18 and older, please.

As always, thanks to the ever lovely, sometimes bitchy Snarkier Than You for proofing my story!! Mwah!

Without further ado...


Chapter 10 - Puny Human


A stony silence permeated the Volvo as Edward sped toward Forks, the trees along the highway a dark blur outside the windows. I glanced over at him, still clutching the bloodied paper towels in my hands. His jaw was a hard line, pulsing slightly, his eyes were narrowed and tight. I knew this was not a good sign.

“My nose isn’t bleeding anymore, Edward,” I said softly, cautiously. “I probably don’t need to have your Dad take a look at it.”

His cheeks hollowed as he sucked in his breath but said nothing.

“You had a good time at the show, didn’t you?" I tried to spark a conversation that wouldn't end up involving our altercation with James.

“Yes. But not afterward,” he replied grimly and it was my turn to suck in an irritated breath. At the sound, Edward's fingers curled tightly around the steering wheel as if he was trying to strangle it.

“No, not after,” I agreed. “But don’t worry about him.”

Edward barked a laugh, slanting his angry gaze in my direction. “Oh, no?” he answered dangerously. “I shouldn’t worry about a guy who just threatened you?”

“Edward, seriously, he’s just full of shit. I know guys like that. He’s all talk.” I gripped the wad of paper, rolling it around in my fist, wondering how I could talk Edward out of whatever he was thinking. I honestly didn't know what the big deal was about James. He was an arrogant prick who tried to toss his weight around, whether because he was older than us or because he had somehow deluded himself into thinking he was important, I didn't know. And I didn't care. At the end of the day, I was sure that James was nothing more than a loud mouth full of bravado. This bog is thick and easy to get lost in/ when you're a stupid,dumb ass, belligerent fucker/I hope it sucks you down...

“You don’t know that.” Clearly, Edward disagreed.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m pretty sure I do.” I returned flippantly.

“You know, Bella,” Edward’s tone hardened and dipped in temperature. “For someone who is so mistrustful of people in general, you really can be fucking naïve. You’re like a fucking magnet for danger.”

My stomach tightened as the all-too-familiar anger slowly unfurled itself in my belly, stretching like a beast after a long hibernation. “I am not naïve!” I brushed one hand roughly through my knotted hair as my other one clutched the soiled paper towels. I smelled like my blood and other people's sweat and I was sure I looked like someone had dredged me up from a cesspool. Edward, of course, was still casually, stylishly rumpled. He was probably the only person at the entire show who hadn't produced an ounce of sweat and, for some reason, this irritated me further and I scowled darkly at him.

The Volvo sped past street lights on the highway and Edward's lean profile blocked the fluorescence with its sharp angles. “You just had to get the last word in,” Edward shot back. “You just couldn’t walk away from that prick. Instead, you continued to provoke him.”

“Are you saying this is my fault?” My nose throbbed and I bit back a groan.

Edward's lips twisted a grimace. “I’m not saying it’s anyone’s fault. All I’m saying is you walk around like you’re fucking invincible and end up doing really stupid things.”

"I do not!" I retorted hotly. "What was I supposed to do? Run away and cower behind you like a scared little girl? I can take care of myself, Edward." I groaned again as the aching began to spread and I rubbed at my temples.

Edward sighed and hesitantly reached out to me. “It still hurts?”

I recoiled from his touch. “Whatever.”

“Bella, stop being so stubborn all the time!” Edward's shoulders hitched in frustration and he gripped the steering wheel again. “You know I’m right. You should have just walked away but you didn’t.”

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling very much like a child who had just been scolded and, as much as I hated to admit it, Edward was probably right.

An image swept past my mind's eye of James, his eyes a glacial blue, calculating and wicked. My stomach knotted a little as I replayed his words, recalled the cruel smile curving on his sharp, hawkish features. Yes, I had dismissed James and, with a pang of alarm, I wondered how many others I had disregarded, how many other situations I had put myself in that could have turned out very badly. All those times I had wandered around the streets of Phoenix by myself, late at night, when Renee was nowhere to be found and boredom drove me from our small apartment. I wasn't a danger magnet. I had a death wish. You burn too bright/ You live too fast/ This can't go on too long/ You're a tragedy starting to happen...

I had no intention of enlightening Edward with my revelation and we fell into an uncomfortable silence, both of us lost in our thoughts.

Then Edward spoke up. “Are you mad at me?” There was a tentativeness in his tone that I had never heard before, marring the confidence I usually heard in his honeyed timbre.

“No,” I answered, surprised. “I’m not mad at you. I’m just… frustrated with the situation.”

“I know,” he sighed. “Me too. I know that guy is up to no good, Bella. He's not going to let it go, I saw it in his eyes. It's like a game to him--you have to believe me.”

“I believe you,” I replied honestly. Edward just nodded curtly as he navigated the car down the Cullen's long, winding driveway.

“Oh shit, the whole crew is here,” Edward grumbled. I looked out the window as the Cullen residence loomed in front of us and saw Rosalie’s very expensive looking red convertible, along with a yellow Porsche, better known as "Alice’s baby”.

“Great.” I didn't even bother to hide the displeasure in my voice as I opened the car door and stepped out, reluctantly following Edward toward the massive house. Our footsteps crunched beneath us, sounding loud compared to the soft soothing rustle of a late night wind that caressed the heavy foliage surrounding the driveway. Large leaves and fronds whispered out to me as we found the slate pathway and I wished I could sink down into their feathery folds, rather than head into what was probably going to be one of the most awkward situations of my life. There is nothing that screams "bad first impression" like a bloody and possibly broken nose when you're about to be introduced to your boyfriend's father. Oh baby, why am I worried now?/ Did someone make a fool of me/ Before I could show them how it's done?

Edward was oblivious to my consternation, kicking open the heavy wooden door that looked as if it would take an army and a few battering rams to break through.

“Carlisle!” he yelled, his voice echoing off the high ceilings. We were in the foyer and I hastily wiped my feet on the doormat, lest I get a single speck of dirt on the shining, spotless ceramic tile. A simple dark wooden bench sat like a sentry next to the door, sleek and modern with razor straight edges and a simple latticework back. Edward tugged at my frayed, stained gray backpack, which I was clutching to my chest like a security blanket, and threw it carelessly onto the leather cushion of the bench. A large, ancient-looking cross rested ominously near the foot of the stairs, stark against the light airy crispness of the house. He smiled sweetly at me, catching something in my expression that made him laugh faintly.

"Don't worry so much," he whispered. I opened my mouth, fully prepared to beg that he not take me upstairs in my state of disrepair, when I was cut off.

“Edward!” Emmett’s deep, booming voice bellowed back. “Dad’s in his study. Come play Wii with us.”

I could hear the chatter of Alice’s animated voice in the distance, followed by a quiet chuckle that clearly belonged to Jasper, and I suddenly wanted to go home. I was tired and in pain and wasn't sure if I could muster the energy needed to play nice.

The sharp click of heels against the floor grew louder as Rosalie rounded the corner and I stood there, frozen, wishing like hell it was anyone else but her. She glanced up at the last minute, her blue eyes widening in shock as she drank in my bedraggled appearance. In one split moment a flutter of emotion flickered across her face before she swung her gaze toward Edward, venom in her eyes.

“What did you do to her?” she demanded, stalking up to Edward. I stepped away, momentarily stunned as Rosalie straightened to her full height, looking both beautiful and menacing.

“I didn’t do it!” Edward replied, offended. “What the fuck, Rosalie?”

“Emmett!” she shouted. “Come here! You need to check this out.” Her full lips were drawn in a tight line and one curvy hip jutted our sharply as she placed her hands on her waist. It was a position that was both sexy and aggressive and only someone with ample curves could pull off. If I had done that, I would have looked like I was about to fall over sideways. For once, Edward said nothing and crossed his arms across his chest, meeting Rosalie's gaze unflinchingly.

I just stood there like an idiot, vaguely wondering why Rosalie was wearing four inch stilettos to play Wii at her boyfriend's house on a Saturday night and wishing I could disappear through the floor. Normally, I would have had some kind of sarcastic response to fling at her but my mind was a blank. I mulled over the possibility of a concussion.

A stampede of footsteps clambered down the hall and the next thing I knew Emmett was standing there, flanked by Alice and Jasper and every single one of them was staring at me with a horrified expression. Alice slapped a slender hand over her mouth, which had dropped open, her eyes wide. Even Jasper's eyes were completely open, rather than their usual half-mast, his lips quirked up into a bemused expression as he absently mussed his own unruly blond curls.

“What the fuck is going on?” Emmett’s confused gaze volleyed between Edward and I, his eyes growing large. “And what happened to you?” he asked me.

“As I was trying to explain to your girlfriend before she jumped to conclusions," Edward glared at Rosalie, who returned it, “Bella got hurt at the show. I was taking her to Dad to have her checked out.”

“Yeah, sure, that’s what happened.” Rosalie rolled her eyes haughtily and pointed her finger at Edward accusingly. “You sure that little ol’ temper of yours didn’t 'happen'?”

Suddenly it dawned on me what Rosalie was insinuating and I started to laugh. She looked at me incredulously.

“Do you honestly think Edward would be standing here with his testicles intact if he had hit me?” I asked bluntly. “I was in the pit and someone hit me. Or kicked me, I’m not sure really…” I trailed off as they continued to stare. “I look really bad, don’t I?”

My explanation appeared to temporarily mollify Rosalie and she relaxed slightly, though she was still staring intently at me as if she was looking for some sign that I was lying. Edward took me gently by the elbow. “Let’s get you cleaned up and looked at, shall we? I think this Spanish Inquisition is over.”

I gave Rosalie a pointed look before I let Edward lead me up a winding set of stairs to the second floor. He said nothing as he rapped his knuckles against a closed door and pushed it open without waiting for a response.

“Carlisle,” he said with a small smile, his fingers tightening a little when I balked. “Can you please take a look at Bella's nose? There was an... accident tonight.”

An incredibly handsome man sat behind a exquisite antique mahogany desk that was scattered with papers and x-ray charts. His hair was blond and slightly tousled, a more dignified version of Edward’s hair, though they looked nothing alike. His eyes twinkled with friendliness as he looked up with a pleased grin on his face...which disappeared immediately when he took in my appearance.

"Hi," I said weakly, feeling the heat burn my cheeks.

Immediately, Carlisle switched into "doctor mode." “What happened?” he asked as he strode over and sat me down in a chair. He didn't look up from me as he gave Edward orders. “And go get a towel and some warm soapy water. We need to wash the blood off.”

It was at that point I decided it was a good time to look at myself in the decorative mirror that was hanging on the wall. My hair was in gnarled tangles, tendrils still somehow stuck to the sides of my neck, where they had dried, mingled with sweat. My nose and mouth were smeared with dried blood and a smattering of blood trickled down my neck. My shirt had large, darkly ominous stains on the front. A bruise was already starting across the bridge of my nose and my right eye was swelling, obscuring the chocolate color of my iris beneath the pink, angry flesh.

“Holy shit!” I gasped at my reflection in horror. Then I realized that I just swore in the presence of Edward’s father and clapped my hand over my nose and mouth, sending a shooting pain through my face and very nearly swearing again. Instead I uttered a garbled yelp.

"It’s okay, Bella,” Carlisle laughed. “Both of my sons have said far worse than that. Now, let’s take a look at this nose, shall we?”

“Thanks, Dr. Cullen,” I muttered. Edward returned shortly afterward, an elegant ceramic bowl filled with water in his hands a cloth draped over his forearm.

“You can call me Carlisle.” He smiled at me as he took the bowl and cloth from Edward and carefully began wiping the blood from my face. His hands were warm and soft against my damaged skin and, though he was very gentle, I held my breath, waiting for the pain to strike me when he began to poke and prod at my nose. It never did and slowly, I began to relax.

“It isn’t broken but you are going to have one nasty bruise for a few days,” Carlisle announced when he was done with his examination. He glanced up at Edward, who was hovering behind me, a meaningful look in his eyes. “Anyone care to explain to me exactly what you mean by 'accident'?”

I recounted the story to Dr. Cullen, flushing a little as I explained exactly what I was doing flailing around in a crowd of rowdy boys. Unlike Rosalie, Carlisle seemed to accept my version of the story and, after he suggested I put some ice on my nose and take some ibuprofen for the pain and swelling, we were dismissed.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Edward asked as he rubbed my back. We were walking down the stairs, Edward one step behind me. His voice was soft but concerned.

“Do you have any whiskey?” I joked. “You know, to help with the pain.”

We hit the landing and I followed Edward into the state-of-the-art kitchen. He pulled out a sleek chrome stool and I climbed onto it, smiling a little as he brushed my hair back and, very delicately, kissed my cheek.

“That can be arranged,” he murmured lightly, his breath tickling my skin. “But first I’ll get you some ice for your nose.”

I groaned. “I can’t believe how terrible it looks. The rumor mill is going to burst into flames on Monday at school.”

“I wonder how long it will take Lauren to start telling people she punched you,” Edward chuckled as he opened a black and chrome refrigerator and filled a baggie with crushed ice. After wrapping it in a very expensive looking dish towel, he handed it to me and I rested it gingerly against my nose.

“I’m pretty sure she’ll be talking by second period,” I replied, my voice muffled under the cloth. “And then I’ll have to punch her in the nose for lying.”

“Judging by that bruise, I actually think you weren’t punched.” Edward scraped the stool next to me out from the counter and folded his lanky body into it. “I think you were probably kicked. Or got a serious elbow. I’ve been punched in the face quite a few times and I’ve never bruised like that.”

This was news to me. “Punched in the face quite a few times?” I repeated, incredulous. “You? I don’t believe it.”

A transformation swept across Edward’s regal features. His eyes iced and hardened, his expression became shuttered, closed down, even as his jaw pulsed with tension. Edward’s long lean fingers, which had been drumming the marble countertop were now curled into a fist.

“Believe what you want,” he said tightly, his voice emotionless. “But it’s the truth.”

I was moving into unchartered territory and knew I had the tread carefully. “Fights at school?”

Edward snorted. “Something like that.”

I paused, then brought the ice away from my face and placed it on the counter. Slowly, I coaxed Edward’s fist open and weaved my cold fingers through his. His hand closed tightly over mine but he still wasn’t looking at me; his gaze was trained somewhere far away.

“Do you want to talk about it?” I asked hesitantly, unsure if I even wanted to listen.

“It was a long time ago.”

“Oh.” I didn’t know how to respond and we both floundered in the heavy silence around us. What's your story?/ I want to listen/ I can't fake pity/ I may not sympathize/ Twilights tailing/ Try my lies for size...

“Bella,” Edward said cautiously, finally turning to look at me. “I’m sorry. It’s a long story and I don’t feel like going into it now.”

“That’s okay,” I assured him. “I understand.”

Edward smiled sadly and I reached out with my free hand to stroke his cheek. He dipped his head to meet my touch and closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

“I knew you would,” he whispered, warmth creeping back into his voice. He opened his eyes and studied me before releasing my hand and picking up the ice pack.

“Keep this on your nose,” he told me firmly. “Why don’t you go into the family room with the rest of the guys and I’ll get us some drinks.”

My heart dropped a little at the thought of walking into that room and having everyone staring at me and asking questions. “I’ll wait.”

“You should just go in there and get comfortable.” Edward looked perplexed. “I’ll be right there. Give me two minutes.”

“Well,” I countered, “I can wait two minutes.”

“Bella –“ Edward’s mossy eyes narrowed but his lips curved up into a smirk. “Wait a minute. Are you afraid to go in there by yourself?”

“No!” I exclaimed, grimacing as my the outburst sent a tremor of pain through my nose. “I just don’t… want to.”

“Why?”

I shuffled my feet. “I want to wait for you.”

“You are afraid!”

“No, I’m not! I just don’t want to talk to them. I don’t know what to say.”

Edward walked over to me and kissed my pouting lips. “You fucking kill me, girl. You have no problem being in a crowd of guys throwing random punches at each other. You’re totally fine with beating up Lauren, or cursing people out that you don't even know but you don’t want to go into a room full of friends?”

“They’re your friends.”

“Bella, they’re your friends, too. They aren’t going to bite.”

“Fine,” I grumbled. Edward smiled and helped me out of the stool.

Slowly, grudgingly, I made my way into the family room, feeling like a lamb going to slaughter. I had seven faces/ Thought I knew which one to wear/ But I'm sick of spending these lonely nights/ Training myself not to care...

Emmett and Jasper were standing in the middle of the room, clutching Wii remotes and staring intently at the huge flatscreen TV. Suddenly, Jasper made a motion like he was swinging a tennis racket, narrowly missing Emmett’s head, who backpedaled and flailed his arm, yelping.

“Fuck!” he bellowed and the girls laughed.

“You absolutely suck at tennis, lovey,” Rosalie chirped, grinning widely, her blue eyes twinkling. I lingered by the doorway and watched them for a moment. She was watching Emmett proudly, her full, luscious lips tilting upwards as she swept her golden locks from her her shoulder and they fell obediently, and beautifully, across her back in a flaxen wave. For the first time, I could really see just how beautiful Rosalie was when she looked at happy. Then she caught my gaze and her smile faded a little and she was back to regular stand-offish bitch Rosalie.

“Hey.” My voice grated over the syllable and I mentally cursed myself as I sidled past Jasper, letting the ice pack dangle uselessly in my hand. “Um, Edward told me to come in here.”

“How’s the nose?” Emmett asked, his eyes trained on the game. He whipped his arm again and the character on the TV mimicked the movement, connecting the with tennis ball and vaulting back into Jasper’s character’s court.

“Uh, it’s fine, thanks.” There were two couches in the room caddy cornered against the wall, as well as a leather recliner. I sat down stiffly in one of the oversized couches, as far away from the guys as possible, in case another errant elbow came my way. I could only handle one pummeling a day.

“Where’s Edward?” Alice twisted from her position on the other couch, next to Rosalie and smiled broadly at me.

“He’s getting drinks.”

“He better be getting drinks for all of us,” grumbled Emmett. Then, he yelled, “EDWARD, GET ME A FUCKING DRINK!!!”

“Christ, Emmett,” Edward’s droll voice rang through the doorway. “Can you yell a little louder?”

“Yes!” the others replied in unison.

I laughed as Edward rolled his eyes and came through the doorway with a tray full of glasses and Coca Cola cans. He put them down on a side table and Alice clapped her hands excitedly.

“You don’t happen to have anything along the lines of, say, alcohol, do you?” she asked, peering up at Edward with her wide, doe-like eyes.

Edward smirked as he placed the tray on an ottoman off to the corner and produced a flask from the back pocket of his jeans. I recognized it from our night in the meadow and knew it was probably full of whiskey. “Of course, dear Alice.”

“I knew it!” she crowed, sliding off the couch and deftly ducking as Jasper took another swing of the remote. "Who wants one?"

When Edward first started bringing me around his friends, I dismissed Alice as a perpetually cheerful, ultra girly goody two shoes. Then one day Edward and I arrived at his house and found Jasper and Alice lounging on the hood of a Mercedes, giggling crazily and smoking a very large joint. Apparently, I'm not a very good judge of character.

"I do!" everyone replied. Alice swiftly poured the whiskey from the flask and began filling the glasses up with Coke. Rose leaned over and grabbed one, wrinkling her nose a little at the strong scent of alcohol.

I pulled myself from the comfort of the couch and picked my way between Emmett and Jasper, whose controllers dangled safely from their wrists. I was reaching for my own glass when there was a noise from the hallway and Alice grabbed the flask before bouncing back to the couch, where she shoved it between the two cushions and settled her body over it.

A very pretty, sweet looking woman entered the room, light honey-brown curls framing her heart-shaped face. She was small and slender but shared Emmett's brown, friendly eyes. My heart picked up speed and I straightened quickly, trying to step away from the contraband drink but there was no where to go. We were busted, I was sure of it. I wondered if she would call Charlie and rat me out.

"I heard there is a new addition to the gang," she said, her voice a lilting contralto.

"Mom, this is Bella," Edward introduced us and I quickly swapped the ice pack I had been holding from my right to left hand in order to shake her hand.

"Hi," I mumbled. "Nice to meet you. Um, sorry about the cold hand."

"Bella, call me Esme." Her smile grew impossibly wide, the corners of her eyes crinkling up. "It's so nice to finally meet you. How are you feeling?"

I stared dumbly at her for a moment before I realized she was talking about my nose and not the fact that I was standing in front of my boyfriend's mother for the first time wearing a blood-stained t-shirt, not to mention the whiskey and Coke next to me.

"It's okay... Esme," I replied as politely as I could, my face burning with mortification. "A bit sore, but Dr. Cullen says it will be fine."

An awkward second ticked by and I chewed my lip nervously as I shifted my weight from foot to foot. I felt the fake smile plastered on my face but couldn't find a way to make it go away.

Alice slid up next to me, grinning at Esme. "Esme, did you get the new Anthropologie catalog this week?" she asked, apparently taking pity on me and deflecting Esme's attentions. I mouthed a silent thank you as Esme focused on Alice.

"I did!" she exclaimed. "Did you see that sweater with the beautiful lace pattern down the back?"

"I loved it!" Alice chirped back, swinging her arms and looking extremely innocent. "Do you have the catalog? There was something I want to show you..." Her voice trailed off as she hooked arms with Esme and they both disappeared from the room.

"Alice is a clothes whore and so is my mother," Edward explained as I stared, confused, at their retreating figures.

"Oh," I answered. "I thought they were talking about science or something. You know, like digging up dinosaurs."

Jasper guffawed. "No, it's some really expensive store that sells strange frilly girly crap that Alice loves."

I shrugged. "Sounds... well, sounds like Alice." I grabbed a drink and was making my way back to the couch when Emmett stuck out his hand and offered me the Wii controller.

"Hey, Bella do you want to play?"

"No thanks, Emmett," I told him, sipping my drink and plopping back down into the couch. "I think I've done enough damage to myself for one day. I'm going to stay away from swinging arms for the rest of the night."

Emmett chuckled. "Fair enough. I don't blame you."

A few minutes later, Alice came back into the room, looking very pleased with herself.

"You're welcome, everyone," she said, winking at me as she dropped onto the couch next to Rosalie. "I think I deserve some props for running parental interference tonight."

Rosalie stared at her, one perfectly sculpted brow cocked. "Do you want a fucking cookie?" she asked, her voice sharp but teasing.

"Nope. But you can massage my feet." Alice moved swiftly and let one bare foot fall into Rosalie's lap. Rosalie's eyes widened in horror and she grimaced, staring at Alice's foot as if it were a rotting, dismembered appendage.

"Ew!" Rosalie shrieked, slapping at Alice's shin. "Get your filthy fucking feet off of me, you bitch!"

Alice only laughed as Rosalie tried to squirm away from her foot.

The couch dipped under Edward's weight as he sat down and he smiled at me.

"Rosalie hates feet," he explained. "She totally freaks out. It's really funny."

At that moment Rosalie jumped up from the couch, her face red, her features twisted with disgust. "Mary Alice Brandon you're such a cuntface sometimes. I swear to God!" She gave a shiver and turned to face Edward and I.

"Move," she demanded as she sat down next to Edward, who gave a grunt of complaint as she squished herself between his body and the arm of the couch.

Alice drank deeply from her glass and stretched her tiny body across the space that Rosalie had occupied moments before, smirking.

"Jasper, can I play winner?" she asked sweetly, lifting her leg in the air and wiggling her toes. Her tiny little ballet shoes were abandoned on the floor and Alice had a huge Cheshire grin on her face, which grew even bigger as Rosalie growled.

"Stop it, Brandon," Rosalie warned. Alice wriggled her toes again, stretching a little as she swung her leg out, her bare foot hovering a few feet away from us. The cuff of her jeans rose slightly, revealing a narrow ankle that had a delicate silver chain wrapped around it.

"Rosalie," Alice could barely keep the mirth out of her voice and failed at making a serious face. "It's time you conquered your irrational fear of feet. I'm helping you, just think of it that way."

"I'm not afraid of feet, you ass-clown!" Rosalie snarled, shrinking back into the couch as far as she could go. "I just think they're disgusting and ugly."

"Darlin', stop harassing Rose," Jasper finally cut in, trying to restore the peace. His soft, mellow voice was comforting and he was grinning lazily at his girlfriend, who smiled back.

I'm just trying to help," Alice repeated, innocently.

"The next time you help I'm going to put MY foot up your ass," Rosalie threatened.

Edward snorted. "I think we may have finally found Rose's Kryptonite, folks."

"You stay out of it, Cullen." Rosalie turned her scowl on Edward.

"Be nice to me or I'll make you rub my feet. Alice's feet are adorable compared to mine." Edward grinned widely and Emmett chuckled.

"Trust me, baby, Edward really does have some nasty ass feet. Seriously ugly," Emmett told Rosalie.

"So they look just like his face," Rosalie retorted.

"Watch it, Rosalie," Edward shot back. I laughed quietly and downed the rest of my drink. My face was still aching, my one swollen eye tearing slightly. I reclined my head and closed my eyes, listening to their chatter and wishing I could jump in. Slowly, the pain in my nose began to fade and I sighed.

I must have drifted off because the next thing I felt was Edward's breath against my cheek, tickling slightly.

"Hey, Bella," he whispered. "It's getting late and you look pretty tired. Why don't I take you home."

"'Kay," I mumbled back, yawning. When I finally opened my eyes I realized that we alone. Edward kissed me gently, careful not to nudge my nose.

"Charlie is going to flip when he sees you," Edward mused as he pulled me to my feet, enveloping me in his warm arms, stroking my tangled locks with one hand.

"Nah," I sighed, tiredly. "He'll get over it."

"Come on, kid." Edward ushered me out of the living room and helped me into my coat, which I had left on the bench by the front door, along with my backpack. Before I could grab it, Edward scooped it up and led me to the car.

The air had grown chilly and damp and as we trudged our way to the Volvo, I yawned tiredly again. Once Edward was satisfied I was safely ensconsed in the vehicle, he slammed the door, walked around to the drivers side and folded himself in. It took a few minutes for the car to warm up enough to put the heat on, but once it was working, Edward tilted the vents in my direction and we headed back to Charlie's.

"Can I see you tomorrow?" he asked as he drove. My iPod was still humming contentedly in the background, soothingly.

"Sure," I replied. "But are you sure you want to? I mean, I'm pretty sure I'm going to look fucking scary tomorrow."

"Bella, you will always look beautiful to me," Edward admonished and I blushed. "I was watching you tonight at the show, you know. It was hard to see you in that crowd but you looked amazing out there. So sexy. And happy."

"Mmm." I leaned my head against the window, smiling. "I was most definitely happy tonight. Well, before I got a boot to the face. That part didn't make me happy."

Edward gave a sad chuckle. "I wish I could make you that happy," he mumured.

I stared at him in silence, processing his words. "You know what Edward?" I said slowly, surprise ringing with each word. "I think you do."

_____________________________________
As always, thanks for reading! It looks like Bella is starting to realize she doesn't always have to be her own island, though she's definitely not very comfortable with 'the crew.'

As always, lyrics (song, artist)

Title - Puny Human - Deadguy

Swamp Song - Tool
Red - Elbow
Middle Cyclone - Neko Case
Can't Stop - Elbow
NYC - Interpol

Monday, November 9, 2009

15 Step - Chapter 9 - Lightsabre Cocksucking Blues


Oh hai, Jerkface here. Not my characters but I'm warping them anyway. Please feel free to leave comments (good or bad). Obviously, 18+ visitors only. And thanks STY, you rule. As always.


Chapter 9 – Lightsabre Cocksucking Blues



“What time does the band start tomorrow?” Edward’s voice faded through the phone for a moment before it came back, loud and strong.

“You don’t have to go, you know,” I replied as I rolled over on my bed and reached over for my laptop.

“That wasn’t an answer to my question.”

I sighed and pulled up the link to the band website. I still wasn’t sure I even wanted Edward there. I was used to going to shows alone and didn’t feel like sharing the experience with anyone. “Doors open at seven. They’re headlining and there are three bands so… ten, I guess?”

“So I’ll pick you up at five and we can get dinner beforehand.”

It wasn’t a question. “Okay, that’s fine.”

“You okay?” Edward’s tone was concerned and I sighed softly again, being careful not to let him hear. He’d been asking me if I was okay for three whole days and it was starting to get irritating. I knew he wanted to know what Charlie and I talked about the day Renee had called, but I couldn’t tell him. It was too personal, too private.

“I’m fine,” I replied, rolling my eyes and trying to keep the exasperation out of my voice. “Honest.”

“I wish I could see you tonight,” Edward replied. “But I promised Emmett and Jasper I would hang out.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I told him. Then I grinned as I realized something. “Hey, Edward,” I said in a singsong voice.

“What?”

“Maybe you should come over a little earlier tomorrow.”

“Oh?” Edward’s voice became lilting also. “Now, why is that Bella?”

“Well,” I began, biting my lip, my insides quivering even as I spoke. “Charlie’s working a shift at the station tomorrow and I’ll be alone all day. I thought maybe you could keep me company." Cold light/hot night/be my heater/be my lover/so we can do it to each other…

I could have sworn Edward gave a small growl as he answered, “I’ll be there at noon.”

“Promise?”

“Oh, I promise,” he replied. I laughed as we said good night and signed off. Carelessly, I tossed the phone onto my bed and reached over for my iPod when there was a knock at my door. My heart dropped to my knees.

“Hello?” I called out, panicked. What if Charlie had been at my door, listening?

“It’s Friday night, Bells,” he said through the door. “Aren’t you going out?”

“Nah,” I replied, pushing myself up from my bed and opening the door. Charlie was standing there, his arms at his sides, looking awkward as always. It was almost endearing. “I’m going to Port Angeles tomorrow so I figured I’d stay in tonight.”

Charlie frowned and the gesture reminded me of Edward a little. “Port Angeles? What for?”

“I’m going to see a band.” I twisted the wire of my headphones absently around my finger and wondered why Charlie was suddenly so interested in what I was up to. Part of me was touched but another part of me was concerned he would forbid me to go and then we’d have to fight all over again because there was nothing that was going to keep me from seeing that band.

“Oh.” Charlie looked a little lost as our conversation trailed off. He eyed my iPod. “You have their music in there?”

I nodded, furrowing my brow. “Uh huh.”

“I’d like to listen to them.”

Laughter bubbled from my lips before I could choke it back. “I’m pretty sure they aren’t your style, Charlie.”

Charlie looked a little rueful. “Yeah, probably not, I guess. What are they? Rap? Britney Spears?”

I snorted derisively. “Nope. Not even close. They’re-- hey Charlie,” I interrupted myself. “What kind of music do you listen to?” I suddenly realized that I had never heard Charlie listen to anything other than the television. I tried to remember if there was even a stereo in the living room.

“Nothing, really. I guess I just never got into the habit.” He looked thoughtful and it gave me an idea. I turned quickly and snatched my laptop off my desk as Charlie watched me, his expression confused.

“C’mon,” I told him firmly, “You’re about to get schooled in music. I think I’ll start you out with some of the older stuff. That might be more up your alley. You know, like Johnny Cash, Kris Kristofferson. I think you’ll like that. Oh, and definitely Tom Waits. Maybe Leonard Cohen, too.” I was talking rapidly as I skirted around Charlie and headed down the stairs. His heavy footsteps followed me as I continued. “Have you ever heard of Leonard Cohen? He doesn’t really sing – it’s more like poetry put to music - but his lyrics are amazing. Totally haunting. And…” I paused when I caught Charlie staring at me with a peculiar expression. “What?”

“I have never heard you talk so much before,” he told me softly.

“Oh. Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Charlie said quickly. “Let me just grab a beer and we’ll sit down.”

“Can you get me one, too?” I yelled half-jokingly as he disappeared around the corner.

“Over my dead body, kid,” he hollered back.

“Can’t blame me for trying!”

“Don’t forget I have a breathalyzer in the cruiser!”

Well, fuck. That never actually even crossed my mind. Regardless, that wasn’t exactly relevant to my plan to filch a few brews once Charlie went to bed later on.

We sat around for a while and I played him various songs from my iPod. He frowned at a lot of them, grimacing when a singer would spew a string of expletives, and it soon became clear to me that Charlie’s love was sports or fishing and not heavy metal or punk. To my surprise and delight, Charlie actually loved Tom Waits and I promised to make a CD for him to bring to work before moving on to another band.

“How can you even understand a word they are saying?” he asked over the guttural screaming of a hardcore band. “It sounds like he’s in pain.”

“Well,” I admitted, “I actually had to look up the lyrics to this one. But I like the fast guitar riffs and the double bass drum. It’s pretty cool that a bunch of people can come up with this shit, ya know? And make it sound good? I mean, the lyrics are really angry and dark and violent. It’s like I can feel his rage when I listen to it. And when you listen to them live it’s even more insane. It’s like the bass drum is trying to compete with your own heartbeat or something. It’s inside of you. That’s why I like to listen to it when I’m all pissed off.” I shrugged and spun the dial on my iPod. “It’s like they understand how I feel, I guess.”

“I can see that,” Charlie murmured, his mustache turning up into a small smile. He glanced up at the clock. “Damn, kid, I got to hit the sack. It’s past my bedtime.”

“All right, Charlie.” I grinned at him. “Have a good night.”

“You too, Bells.” Charlie grinned back, his dark eyes twinkling. “Hey, I had a good time tonight. Maybe we can do this again?”

“Sure thing, Charlie,” I told him. “Do you like death metal?”

Charlie rolled his eyes and stood. “Be good, kid.”

“Will do,” I chirped. Charlie sighed and headed upstairs. I listened from the couch as he performed his nightly ablutions and, when the noise finally died down I tiptoed my way into the kitchen and snatched a couple of Rainiers.

I snuck upstairs as quietly as could, holding my laptop to shield the cans from Charlie just in case he decided to poke his head out of his bedroom door. Once safely nestled in my bedroom I popped the top and sank into my computer chair. My cell phone gave a muffled beep from my bed.

I couldn’t help but grin as I saw the alert for a new text message. It could only be one person.

What are you doing?

I sighed and wrote back, you’re a nosy motherfucker.
The cell snapped closed and I opened my laptop. The homepage was still loading up when my cell phone beeped again.

You’re up to no good, aren’t you?

Laughing, I punched in another message. Of course. I have a reputation to keep.

I took another swig of beer and nearly choked on it as an idea came to me. Grabbing the phone, I turned on the camera, held the can up to my face and snapped a picture. Then I forwarded it to Edward. Now a lady can’t do nothin’/ without folks’ tongues waggin’/ Is this blood on the tree/ or is it Autumn’s red blaze/ When the ground’s soft for diggin’/ and the rain will bring all this gloom/ There’s nothing wrong with a lady/ drinkin’ alone in her room…

Another beep and I giggled, reading the message.

Underage drinking is illegal. I’ll have to punish you for that tomorrow.

My fingers flew across the keypad. I’d like to see you try.

Are you challenging me?

Perhaps.

Silly Bella. You really shouldn’t have done that. Good night.


An excited shiver tickled down my spine at Edward’s threat. There was something thrilling about knowing Edward had a dark streak in him.

I woke early on Saturday, excitement bubbling through me, and I couldn’t decide what I was looking forward to more, the band or spending a few hours alone with Edward. It was a tough call. Singing softly to myself, I made a cup of coffee and headed to my bedroom. I tidied it up, making sure there wasn’t any dirty underwear lying around where Edward might find them before I made my way to the bathroom to clean myself up for Edward’s arrival.

By the time I was done taking care of everything, I had about an hour to kill. I plugged my iPod into my laptop and adjusted the speakers, making them as loud as possible without distorting the sound and set it on the kitchen table. I sang along loudly as I cleaned up the kitchen, dancing to the country twang that blared from the tiny speakers.

Huff paint, cocaine, playin’ chicken with a train Smack dab, Meth lab, mellow out, rehab Percocet, cigarette, I don't need no more of that just gimmie some down home Dixie fried homegrown Alabama high test...

I put away a couple of mugs and slammed the cabinet shut, rocking my hips, my voice competing with the singer, sounding loud over the whine of the fiddle.

Drug bust, disgust, plead with the circuit judge "Son don’t be coy, send you up the river Boy" Jump suit, chain gang, shackles on my feet and hands Standin’ on I-65 wishin’ I was rolling by with Alabama high test…

I spun around so quickly my hair whipped against my face and grabbed the broom that was resting against the wall, sweeping in time to the bass drum, as I imagined a man stuck on a chain gang, looking wistfully at the cars that were speeding by.

A dark shadow crossed the threshold of the kitchen and I froze, gripping the broom tightly for a moment before I leaned over and turned off the music.

“Hello?” I called. I heard nothing but my own increasingly panicky breaths.

“Charlie?”

Silence.

I lifted the broom slightly and held it out in front me, hoping to use it as a weapon if I needed to. I was afraid to turn my back on the hallway to grab a knife.

“Listen, fucker,” I said loudly, my voice shaky, “I’m standing in a kitchen with a shitload of knives. If there is anyone out there, they’re going to get a big ass butcher knife right in the heart.”

Silence.

Carefully, as quietly as I could, I crept forward. The hallway was empty and the front door was shut. My breathing returned to normal and I scolded myself for being such a scaredy-cat. Forks was making me soft.

Then I saw another blur out of the corner of my eye. Before I could even react, strong, muscular arms wrapped around me, trapping me in an iron grip and the broom clattered to the ground, useless, as I let out an ear-shattering scream. My hair was everywhere, in my face, blinding me and I was just gearing up to deliver a sharp kick to my assailant’s shin when I heard a very familiar chuckle.

“Fuck you, Edward!” I bellowed, struggling against him. He released me, laughing even harder, and I whipped around, shoving him with all my might. He stumbled back a step and doubled over, still laughing.

“Your face,” he gasped, “was fucking priceless! I thought you were going to piss yourself.”

“You almost gave me a heart attack!” I yelled back, shoving him again. He grabbed my outstretched hands and pulled me tightly to him, ignoring my protests.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” Edward kissed the top of my head and I harrumphed, still angry at him for frightening me.

“I’ve got a shitload of knives,” he teased me, his voice falsetto and mocking. “Oh Bella! Always acting like the tough guy.”

“Fuck you,” I muttered. “You’re lucky I didn’t kick you in the nuts or something.”

“I thought about that,” he admitted, releasing me, still grinning. “But that’s what you get for leaving a spare key in the most obvious place ever.” Edward reached into his pocket and handed me the silver key. “I mean, practically everyone hides their key on the top of the door frame. You’d think Chief Swan would be a little smarter than that.”

I shoved the key in my pocket and glared at him. “This is Forks. It’s not like its New York City.”

I felt Edward’s eyes on me as I bent to retrieve the broom and stomped into the kitchen.

“By the way,” he remarked casually, pulling out a chair and folding himself into it. “I liked watching you dance. Your singing, on the other hand, could use a little work.”

I flushed, the heat creeping into my cheeks as Edward drummed his long, lean fingers on the pocked surface of Charlie’s kitchen table.

“How long were you watching me?” I asked tersely. I wasn’t sure if I was pleased he liked my dancing or annoyed that he had violated my privacy.

“Long enough.” Edward’s eyes followed my movements intently. “Didn’t know people danced like that to… country music. It was quite sexy.”

“You think a song about cocaine and meth was sexy?” I raised a brow at him.

“No, I thought you dancing to a song about cocaine and meth was sexy.”

Awkwardly, I huffed, a little uncomfortable with the complement and moved forward to turn on some music when suddenly Edward shoved his chair out, a sinister looking smile on his face.

“Come here,” he demanded, patting his lap.

I shook my head, pouting, pretending to still be mad at him. “No.”

He lunged for me and I was too taken aback to move out of the way. Everything happened so quickly and the next thing I knew I was roughly upended over Edward’s lap with my ass sticking up awkwardly over his knees.

This was a very, very dangerous position, I realized.

“Hey!” My protest was accompanied by an uncharacteristic nervous giggle. “Let me up right now!”

“Now,” Edward smacked his lips appreciatively, “this is most definitely very, very sexy.”

“Hardy har,” I groused, struggling a little bit, my face burning from embarrassment. Edward placed his hands lightly on my ass.

“Bella Swan, you have a very nice ass,” he said conversationally. “Do you know that?”

“Um, no,” I answered. I rested my palms on the kitchen floor and tried to get up but Edward pushed me back down.

“Do you recall our little texting session last night?”

“No.” Oh shit, yes, I did. Edward Cullen never backs down from a challenge. And I challenged him. I gave another nervous giggle. “Edward, let me up. I mean it.”

“No can do.” He gave my ass a gentle pat. “What did I tell you last night?”

“Don’t remember,” I replied grimly, resorting to total denial as my face burned with embarrassment and anticipation. His hand left my rear for a brief moment and he shifted, bringing his leg over both of mine, effectively trapping me. I struggled harder.

“Yes you do. Say it.” Edward was enjoying himself immensely.

“No!”

I heard the slap a split second before I felt it and I yelped. The predicament was strangely confusing to me. I was generally quick to take the offensive in situations where there was the possibility of someone hitting me, yet I was lying in a very vulnerable position and Edward had just hit me. I should have killed him. Or at least wanted to… but I didn’t. I didn’t understand it.

“Edward!” I half-shrieked, half-laughed. “Stop!”

“What did I say to you last night?” He brought his hand down on my ass again. Hard.

I bit my lip and said nothing. My body involuntarily stiffened as Edward brought his palm down against my rear end, which was starting to feel a little… warm.

I growled. “Fine! You said underage drinking was illegal and…” I trailed off, too mortified to continue. It didn’t help that I was also getting incredibly aroused and the contradiction in my emotions was confusing me.

I didn’t have a chance to work through it before he smacked me again and I gave another little mew of discomfort despite my effort to remain silent.

“Say it. Out loud!” he commanded sternly. “I won’t stop spanking you until you do.”

I squealed as Edward spanked me again, twice in quick succession.

“You said you were going to punish me for it!” I cried out, bucking.

“That’s right,” Edward crowed triumphantly. “And now you’re going to be punished. I hope a nice good spanking will teach you a lesson.”

He began to spank in me earnest, ignoring my yelps and cries. My ass was starting to feel like it was on fire and I thrashed harder against him.

“Edward,” I whined. “You’re hurting me. Stop!”

“It’s supposed to hurt.” He delivered a particularly painful slap to my right cheek. “That’s why it’s a punishment. Have you learned your lesson, Bella Swan?”

“Yes!” I stopped struggling against him, wincing as he gave me a few more swats. I wondered vaguely if my ass was as red as my face and decided it was probably redder.

I also wondered how on earth I was going to get back at him without ending up in this situation again.

“There.” Edward moved his leg, releasing me and helped me sit up in his lap.

“Ow.” I squirmed on my sore ass, pushing my disheveled hair out of my face and narrowed my eyes at Edward.

He was watching me, intensely, his eyes dark and hungry, his lips curving into a dangerous smile.

“Did you like that?” he asked me softly. I ducked my head, embarrassed, and nodded minutely.

“I did too.” His lips suddenly crashed against my and he stood, scooping me into his arms. My back hit the kitchen wall and I wrapped my legs around Edward’s waist, greedily kissing him as he grabbed a handful of my hair, pulling slightly.

“Let’s take this upstairs, shall we?” he whispered as he nipped at my neck. I moaned my agreement and he quickly headed for the stairs, kissing my neck as we stumbled down the hall.

Edward didn’t even bother to shut the door when we reached my room. Instead he dropped me on my bed, staring at me with a terrifying expression.

“Take off your pants,” he demanded imperiously, pulling his shirt off. I was momentarily stunned at the sight of Edward bare-chested. Despite our many petting sessions, I had never seen him with his shirt off. He was magnificent, lean and muscular. Hastily, I stripped out of my jeans. Dimly, I wondered why I was being so obedient and couldn’t decide if it was because of the spanking, Edward half-naked or the fact that there was a very good chance we were going to have sex. Or all of them combined.

“And your shirt.” Edward crouched at the end the bed, looking like he was preparing to pounce and I obeyed, quickly.

Dark emerald eyes traveled up and down my figure as I leaned back, half-sitting, and rested on my forearms. “Fucking gorgeous,” he breathed. “Oh, Bella. You are in so much fucking trouble.”

Before I could open my mouth he was pushing me down on the bed, covering the length of my body with his. His belt buckle dug into my stomach and I let out a whimper.

“Take off your pants,” I whispered.

Edward grinned wickedly. “Are you sure?”

I knew what his question really meant and I met his gaze and nodded. “Very sure.”

Quickly he pulled off his jeans and I tried not to laugh when they became entangled around his ankles. With a frustrated grunt, he finally freed himself and turned back to me.

His hands slid up my hips to my waist as he lightly nibbled at my flesh. My breath hitched when his lips found my breast, his breath warming me through the flimsy cloth of my bra. I weaved my fingers through his unruly hair, arching my back, forcing my nipple to greet his lips. I watched as his lean fingers tugged the bra away and his tongue made slow, lazy circles that sent a fire straight from my nipple to my cunt.

I moaned loudly and felt a pinch as Edward bit down delicately. The fire between my legs increased in intensity and a very unladylike grunt burst from my lips.

“You like that.” Edward murmured, peering up at me through his eyelashes. He brought his teeth to my flesh again and I gasped, bucking.

“Yes!” I hissed through my teeth. Edward grinned and continued his slow assault on my breasts until I could barely lay still. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore, the throbbing was becoming unbearable. I pushed at his hands and shifted positions. His brow furrowed as I looked at him, grinning.

“My turn,” I told him slyly, pushing him onto his back. I straddled his waist, leaning back a little as I drank in his body. Thick but lean, muscles rippling beneath the skin of his belly as I purposefully brought my panty-clad pussy against his erection. I liked the way I could see his Adam’s apple bob in the hollow of his neck in response; it let me know he wasn’t as calm as he was trying to be.

“Let me play,” I murmured huskily. “Just relax.”

He complied, relaxing as he allowed me to explore his body. I took my time kissing him, first on the mouth, then his neck. Edward sucked in a breath and groaned loudly as I nibbled at his earlobes and I made mental note. Slowly, I made my way down to his chest, breathing in his delicious scent, enjoying the slightly salty taste of his skin, the way his chest hair tickled my cheek as I licked at his nipple. Edward sighed, contentedly, his eyes watching my every move. They widened as I dipped my head even lower, past his navel. I could feel his erection against my breasts and I paused for a moment, leaning even lower and capturing his cock between my breasts. I felt his erection grow and it pushed insistently against me. I narrowed my eyes as I brushed my fingers over the top of his boxers, still kissing his taut belly and hid my grin as I dipped my fingers past his waistband and heard his breathing pick up pace.

Then, abruptly, I stopped. Edward’s expression fell into confusion and, I noted with a small amount of alarm, outrage.

“That’s what you get for spanking me,” I told him, pursing my lips.

His face darkened and he let out a guttural roar as he sat up to grab me and we tumbled back down, Edward on top of me. He gathered my wrists in one hand and pinned them over my head.

“You fucking tease,” he snarled. I shivered under his mock angry gaze and grinned, moving my head so I could kiss him.

“Just kidding,” I whispered.

Edward’s eyes narrowed and he licked his lips. “I should fuck you hard for that,” he told me.

I nearly exploded at his words.

“You’ll have a hard time doing that if you’re holding my hands.”

Edward released me and I felt him yank at my panties. I lifted my hips off the bed so he could take them off. He leaned over and pulled a condom out of the pocket of his crumpled jeans.

He was just about to tear through the foil when he stopped and looked at me. “Are you sure?”

I nodded. “You promise to play nice?” I asked coyly.

Edward deftly rolled on the condom and pushed himself between my legs. He stroked my cheek and kissed me softly.

“After that stunt you just pulled?” he said sweetly. I felt his cock nudge against my entrance, insistently. “Absolutely not.”

He thrust so quickly that I nearly shrieked as he filled me. My hips bucked against him as pleasure rolled over me in waves. He didn’t pull out right away, instead moving slightly, pushing himself even deeper inside me.

“Okay?” he asked softly, pulling out slowly, eyes heavy with want. I nodded and he pushed back into me, firm yet gentle.

“Fuck, Bella, you feel fucking fantastic. So tight.” Edward’s fingers wove through my hair and he bent his head to kiss me deeply as he moved inside of me.

I arched my back as Edward picked up the pace, his breathing harsh in my ear and he grunted loudly as I lifted my legs and pulled me knees into my chest, allowing him to drive his cock even deeper.

“Oh, fuck!” I gasped, my arms wrapped around him tightly and he gripped my ass, lifting me slightly and I moaned, feeling my belly pull tight as the tension mounted. It was amazing. My body was taut and aware, tense, my muscles coiling for a grand release and I sighed heavily, pushing myself against Edward’s pelvis, driving him even deeper.

A dark chuckled sounded in my ear. “That’s what I’m doing, Bella.”

“Oh god, yes,” I hissed and he suddenly pulled out, leaving me feeling suddenly, violently empty. For a horrifying moment I thought he was paying me back for the stunt I had pulled earlier and I nearly howled in protest.

“Get on top of me,” Edward demanded and I straddled him, grabbing on to the headboard of my bed to maintain my balance. Slowly, I lowered myself onto his cock, groaning as it filled me. Edward watched me with an almost rapt expression and he grabbed my hips. I raised myself just as slowly and Edward sighed.

“You’re torturing me,” he moaned.

“I am?” I said in a teasing voice. I angled my hips and started to move faster, feeling powerful as Edward’s breathing picked up speed, getting ragged. His hands trailed up my torso and came to rest on my breasts. The tension in my belly tightened as he rolled my nipples between his fingers, plucking them roughly, the pain delicious as it threatened to push me over the edge. I closed my eyes.

“I love watching you ride me,” he growled, sliding one hand to my ass while the other continued to pinch my nipple. “You are so fucking beautiful.”

He raked the tips of his fingers across the sore flesh of my ass and I groaned, seething with pleasure.

“The next time I spank you I’m going to fuck you from behind right afterward.”

My eyes flew open as the first wave of orgasm washed over me and Edward grabbed my hips roughly and thrust himself deeply inside me. I wailed in pleasure and Edward gave a rough groan, holding me even tighter as his own climax moved through him.

“Holy fuck,” Edward breathed, pulling me into his chest and wrapping his arms tightly around me. “Holy fuck.”

“Uh huh,” I mumbled into his neck, pleasantly spent. Carefully, I shifted so I was lying next to Edward and he nuzzled my cheek with his nose.

I was slowly drifting off when suddenly Edward spoke.

“I’ve never done that before,” Edward said softly. My head rested on his chest, his fingers gently stroking through my hair.

“You’ve never had sex before?” I asked, teasingly.

He grunted. “I was talking about punishing you. I’ve never done that before to another girl.”

I blushed. “Well, I’ve never had anyone do that to me before.”

“It was incredibly hot, watching you struggle and cry out.” Edward’s expert fingers traced my jaw.

“Mmm,” I agreed wryly. “In a slightly painful kind of way, I suppose.”

“I’m going to do that every time you do something stupid or dangerous.” His tone was full of conviction and I frowned.

“Maybe,” I replied.

“Maybe?” Edward fingers tilted my chin up, forcing me to meet his gaze and there was tenderness in his eyes.

“What time is it?” I changed the subject and reached over him to grab my cell phone off the nightstand. “It’s almost four. We probably should get going.”

Edward sighed and rolled over. I stood up and looked around my room for my t-shirt before discreetly opening a drawer and pulling out a new pair of underwear and tugged them on.

“You ready?” I asked once we were fully clothed. Edward leaned down and kissed me tenderly.

“Whenever you are,” he replied, rubbing his nose against mine.

I slid my hand, almost shyly, into his. “Let’s go.”

We walked out to Edward’s car hand in hand and I smiled when he opened my car door.

“Give me your iPod.” Edward held out his hand and I fished it from my backpack. Every time we were in his car he asked me for it. Sometimes he requested that I put on an album I wanted to listen but mostly he put the device on shuffle, giving us a very eclectic mixture of background music.

He plugged it into his car and hit play, obviously wanting to hear what I had been listening to last. Strange, almost demented sounding circus-esqe music filled the Volvo.

“Well, this is fucking weird,” he remarked as we hit the highway and headed toward Port Angeles. “Why do you like this stuff?”

I smiled to myself, recalling my music session with Charlie. “Well, first of all, they are really talented musicians. I like the craziness of their sound. I mean, it’s really dramatic and kind of over the top and peppy but it’s also kind of sinister, too. The lyrics are a contradiction to the sound. They’re dark and kind of bitter. They sing about heartbreak and lost love and stuff.”

Leaning over, I turned up the volume and the car filled with pianos, bells, flutes, and the lilting sound of xylophones. It was insanely, maniacally chipper and cacophonic. Hypocrisy at its finest. “Listen to the lyrics,” I told Edward.

Am I supposed to close my eyes as you walk away from me
Am I supposed to blind myself so I'll never have to see
you walking side by side with a different kind of man
who'll redefine your body in ways I know I..
what if I don't want to go now

will you come and put these eyes out for me...


“It kind of makes me uncomfortable,” Edward admitted. “It’s sort of… jarring.”

“It is,” I agreed. “But I like things that make me uncomfortable, I guess.”

Edward grinned devilishly at me. “Yes, you do.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”

The drive passed quickly as Edward and I bantered back and forth, occasionally throwing out good-natured insults and teasing one another. We showed up to the legion hall and there was already a crowd of kids lingering around the parking lot. A few eyebrows raised as Edward navigated his Volvo between a rusty old station wagon and a truck that looked even more decrepit than mine. I realized that Edward would stick out like a sore thumb. His designer jeans clung to his hips and his t-shirt was ridiculously expensive looking, even though it was simple. He just looked rich. Hardcore kids and rich kids, in general, weren’t a very good mix. Rich kid, rich kid, get outta my hair (get out of my way, get out of my way)/ I’ll sing what I sing/ I’ll wear what I what I wear…

“You know,” Edward said quietly to me, grabbing my hand. “I was a little insulted when I showed up today and you were wearing a pair of jeans and a Forks High t-shirt. But I see why now.”

I chuckled a little. “Edward, it’s not like I’m going to wear a prom dress. It’s going to be hot and stuffy in there. People are going to mosh and sweat. No sense in dressing up.”

“People are looking at us.”

“No,” I corrected. “People are looking at you. You’re not exactly second-hand store chic. Don’t worry about it. Fuck them. We’re here for the music, not the crowd.”

Edward looked down at me and smiled in a way that made me melt. “This is so important to you, isn’t it?”

I nodded as we dodged around a group of kids that were arguing back and forth about politics.

“And you only come here for the music, not to make friends or hang out with people.”

“It’s all about the music,” I explained simply. “Why would you go to see a live band if you didn’t want to see the music? I mean, who cares about the other people.”

Edward stopped me, suddenly. “Bella, have you ever had friends? Besides your iPod?”

I bristled and ignored his question. “Look,” I said harshly. “This is what makes me happier than anything in the world. I have never taken someone to a show before. So you either shut up with your little analysis of all of this and enjoy it or you can leave me here and I’ll find a way home. Capisce?”

His dark eyes smoldered and I noticed his shoulders tighten. I expected an outburst from him but instead, he simply took up my hand again and simply said, “Okay, Bella. Let’s go.”

I tuned Edward out a little as we stepped into line. He seemed to sense that I wanted a little space and, though he held my hand, he was silent, watching me.

This was my time. I wanted to tell him that he must mean something to me if I was taking him to a show but I couldn’t. I didn’t know how to articulate what I felt. So I stopped thinking about it. We dance to all the wrong songs/ we enjoy all the wrong moves/ we dance to all the wrong songs/ we’re not… leading…

I was so excited to get inside I could barely contain it. I bounced from one foot to another, impatiently waiting as the line shuffled ahead, trading seven dollars for a stamp on the back of the hand. Though the crowd was mostly teenagers or twenty-somethings, a few older folks milled about as the crew raced around on the makeshift stage, setting up for the band.

Edward raised an eyebrow when we entered the building, scanning the dimly lit, packed room.

“I’m going to go up front when my band goes on,” I informed him. “I’ll stay back here with you for the opening bands, but I’m pretty sure you’re not going to want to come up front with me.”

“Why is that?”

“Well,” I tried to explain. “It’s kind of crazy in the pit – you know, people pushing and shoving or riding the crowd. If you’re not used to it, you can get hurt.”

“And you’re going to participate?” Edward asked, incredulous. “Bella, you’re half the size of most of the people in this room.”

“Edward, I like to be up front,” I replied quietly, almost imploringly. “I want to be up there and I don’t want to be worrying that you’re up there, getting hurt. Or worse.”

Edward sighed and it looked like he wanted to put up an argument, but thought better of it. “Fine.”

We barely spoke as the bands came on and occasionally I’d peek up at Edward to try to observe his reaction. He watched not just the band, but also the crowd, very intently, his eyes bright and curious. Every once in awhile he would tap his foot in time to the music and I knew he was getting into it. When the second band came on, I felt his arm snake around my waist.

“Since you’re going to ditch me soon, I figured I might as well take advantage of your close proximity,” he said into my ear as he pulled me closer to him. “Plus, I want every fucking guy in this place to know you belong to me.”

“I am not an object to possess,” I protested vehemently, a little insulted.

Edward’s hand tightened around my waist, a little painfully and he kissed my cheek. “You are the object of my affection and I am very possessive of what I care about,” he answered, his voice dark.

“Shut up and watch the band,” I retorted. Edward rolled his eyes and returned his attention to the stage.

The moment the second band was finished, I stood on my tiptoes, gave Edward a very deep kiss and disappeared into the thick crowd before he could protest. It took me about five minutes to push my way through the throngs of people but finally, as the lights dimmed, I had managed to make my way to the stage and was squished between two burly boys.

I tapped my foot anxiously, waiting for the band to start, feeling my heart pound and rattle inside my chest, frenetic with excitement and anticipation. I lived for this. Everything else in my life disappeared the moment I heard the screech of guitar, or the pounding of drum. It was all around me, next to me, inside of me. At that moment I was no longer Bella Swan, but a part of something so much bigger. I belonged to the music and the music belonged to me. I could feel the hum of the amplifiers in my chest and knew it would only increase when the drummer started playing. I couldn’t wait – and I didn’t have long.

The room exploded when the band started to play and I kept my forearm in front of me to protect myself from any errant hands or feet that might come my way. We sang along with the song, throwing our fists in the air as adrenaline and excitement coursed through me, leaving me feeling light and breathless.

Did you really fall for this again? Did you believe that he was a man?
Did you think there was something real
In the things we’ve said.
Just to be a lord over you (in bed)

He’ll tell you everything
You’ll ever want to hear
Cause he wants to be your most dear

He wants to be the reason for your tear
And the music that’s playing in your ear
He wants to be your reservoir of pleasure
And wants to be your heart’s only treasure

Your everything, your only-thing

Your god, he wants to be your god

How far you fall for it – how far you fall

My throat protested as I screamed along with crowd, pounding my foot on the floor in time to the heavy drum beat, shifting and undulating, an ocean of people, organized chaos. As the band launched into the chorus, something hit me violently; it felt as if a fire exploded in my face. For a split second the world went black and silent, with only the pain accompanying me. The next thing I knew many hands were reaching down to pull me up off the floor. I gazed around me, trying to convey my thanks to the boys who had formed a protective circle around me so I didn’t get trampled by the moshing crowd.

A torturous throbbing pulsed through me. I almost marveled that my body could feel something so terrible. Then I looked down, dumbly, as I pulled my cupped hands away from my nose and saw a little puddle of blood in them. For the first time in my life, I swooned.

A lanky man with a shaved head and multiple tattoos helped propel me through the crowds, his arm protectively around me as he led me toward the back of the room. Once he ascertained I was in no danger of getting clocked in the face again, he disappeared back into the melee as the band played on. Someone else shoved a wad of paper towels into my hands and I pressed it gingerly against my nose, suddenly aware of the tears of pain that were streaming down my cheeks. My god, it hurt.

“Bella!” Over the cacophony of the music, I heard Edward’s voice, wild with panic. His face was twisted with concern but also fury and for a moment I thought he was mad at me. Then his form blurred as tears distorted my vision. I clutched at the paper towels that were rapidly turning a bright red.

“What the fuck happened?” Edward came to a halt in front of me. “Jesus Christ, Bella. Someone hit you?”

“No one hit me, Edward,” I mumbled, my voice sounding nasally. I jerked my head toward the door and Edward followed me out.

The cool air hit my sweaty face and I stumbled, dazed and dizzy. The smell of blood was overpowering and I almost sank to the sidewalk but Edward grabbed me and led me to a bench.

“You need to go to a hospital.”

“No I fucking don’t,” I replied. “It’s just a bloody nose. It’ll stop soon.”

“Who hit you?” Edward looked venomously angry.

“No one hit me, Edward,” I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose gingerly, wincing as pain coursed through it. “I don’t know what hit me. Maybe a boot from someone crowd surfing. Maybe an elbow? I don’t know. That’s just how it is. It’s nobody’s fault.”

“I should have gone up there with you,” Edward muttered, more to himself than me.

“Why? So you could see me get punched in the face?” I was starting to get pissed off. “Look, it’s not a big deal, forget it.”

“You’re going to see my father.”

I frowned. “What the hell does that have to do with anything?”

Edward rolled his eyes. “He’s a doctor. He can take a look at your nose.”

“Be real, Edward,” I snapped. “You’re going to introduce me for the first time to your father when I’m covered in blood?” I plucked at my Forks High t-shirt, now smattered with blood. “No way.”

“No arguing,” Edward told me firmly. “Come on, let’s go-“

“Well, well, if it isn’t Bella and her pretty boy,” a cold voice interrupted Edward and inwardly I groaned. James sauntered over to us, surrounded by three other men and a woman with fiery red hair. He grinned at us.

“Fuck,” I hissed under my breath. I knew why James was looking so pleased with himself and by the taut set of Edward’s jaw, he knew as well. We were outnumbered.

“What happened, Bella?” James asked innocently. “Got a little too rough in there for you? Pretty boy couldn’t take care of you, huh?”

“Shut up, you fucker,” Edward snarled. I hopped up from the bench and stood in front of him. He was glowering at James and his friends, fists clenching and unclenching.

“Edward,” I kept my voice low. “Don’t even play into it. I’m serious.”

“Better listen to your bitch,” the red headed woman said.

I was in pain, still bleeding, and immensely annoyed that there was a good chance a fight was about to break out. I needed to diffuse the situation and quickly.

“Let’s go, Edward,” I said, tugging at his arm. He complied, still shooting daggers at James. “I think my nose is broken. I probably need to go to the ER.”

I hoped that James wouldn’t do anything to delay my medical attention and it worked. They let us pass through. At the least minute, I turned back and saw James watching me.

“See you around, Bella,” he called after me. “Maybe I’ll stop by and visit one of these days.”

“Yeah, right,” I scoffed. “Good luck finding me. Asshole.”

“I have a good idea where to look,” James replied, laughing. “And when I do find you, we’re going to have a fun time together.”

I glowered at him but said nothing. Instead, I slipped my hand into Edward’s.

Edward looked down at me and I was startled by his expression. His eyes were wide, glittering with something akin to anger but tinged with an emotion I couldn’t quite decipher.

His expression unnerved me. “My nose isn’t bleeding anymore,” I offered. He was still staring at me, panicked. “What? Don’t listen to that fucker. It’s not like he fucking knows where I live or anything.”

“Bella,” he whispered. “Look at your shirt.”

“What?” I peered down and froze, finally understanding Edward’s consternation as the mascot of Forks High School stared right back at me.

I stared up at Edward and swallowed thickly. “Huh. That’s not good, is it?”

_________________

Title
Lightsabre Cocksucking Blues - McClusky (these dudes are fucking great)

Lyrics
Cold Night - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
Murder in the Red Barn - Tom Waits
Alabama High Test - Old Crow Medicine Show
Ice Dogs - Man Man
Get Outta My Way - Rancid
New Noise - Refused
Woman - 108

Thursday, October 8, 2009

15 Step - Chapter 8 - Run, Devil, Run (Twilight Fan Fiction)

For the newbies, this is the eighth chapter. If you want to start reading this story, go here.

15 Step is going to be posted chapter by chapter. I don't intend on it being too long but... we'll see. This story is Bella's POV. Everyone is a human. I did attempt to keep a decent amount of the original stories in this tale.

Disclaimers - The characters, naturally, are Stephenie Meyer's and I've just warped 'em a little to suit our, er, "needs." The titles of the chapters and anything in italics do not belong to me, either. The titles are actually song titles and the italicized bits are pieces of lyrics that I've pulled from songs.

And, this goes without saying, these stories are intended for mature, adult readers. Well, adult, at least. Eighteen and over only.

And thank you everyone for being so patient (and for the encouraging emails and comments reminding me that not ALL of you are all that patient).

Chapter Eight – Run, Devil, Run

Something changed in Edward after our fight. It was so imperceptible I didn’t even notice it at first. Occasionally I would catch him watching me with a curious expression, one that shifted between almost confused and something much darker, but it disappeared the moment he knew I was looking at him. The argument seemed to have awakened something--sparked a new emotion inside of him-- but I couldn’t be sure. I wasn’t even sure if it was a result of our fight or just the natural progression of our relationship. I just knew something was different.

And that’s what it was now: a relationship. In the weeks following our argument, we moved from ‘casually dating’ to ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’ seamlessly and unconsciously. Neither of us ever said anything about it and I didn’t want to admit that I wasn’t entirely comfortable with the change in status. I felt a little out of control, like I might lose myself in the situation.

I liked Edward. A lot. Even if I wanted to bail, to protect myself, I wasn’t so sure I would be able to anymore. I kept trying to reign myself in, remind myself to be careful. To keep myself safe. There was just something about us that seemed to just make sense, albeit abstractly but I still wasn't sure being with him was a good idea. Honey, I'm a prize and you're a catch/ and we're a perfect match/like two bitter strangers/ and now I see the long and short of it/ and I could make it last...

But I couldn't stay away.

I just wasn’t girlfriend material- it was a role I didn’t know how to play and the concept trampled all my self-imposed rules into the ground, yet I couldn’t stop myself. Edward was a strong force I felt drawn to, whether I wanted to or not. Despite my best efforts to keep my own struggle tucked neatly away, I sometimes wondered if he could my sense my uncertainty. There was a desperation to his kisses now, his caresses more demanding, almost possessive.

Every morning Edward would be waiting for me in the parking lot at school and we would walk to homeroom together. He seemed to have this need to touch me, whether it was pushing an errant lock of hair behind my ear or resting his hand against the small of my back as we walked. The public display of affection, no matter how subtle, was still vexing for me and I felt uneasy. But, when night fell and I was restless in my bed, I let my hands wander and remembered each and every one of Edward’s caresses until I finally drifted, happy and sated, to sleep.

Edward’s affections, unfortunately, also drew the attention of others to me. If Lauren and her clique hated me before, they definitely thirsted for my blood now. The first time we passed them in the hall Lauren’s jaw dropped and Jessica’s eyes narrowed to reptilian slits. I couldn’t help but give them a small smug smile every once in awhile. I tried not to think about how ironic it was that I was more worried about someone liking me than hating me.

Lauren Mallory and her ilk weren’t the only ones who disliked me. Edward insisted that I eat lunch with him and his friends, which included Rosalie. She vacillated between completely ignoring my presence to making snide comments, and it was all I could do to keep from lunging over the table and throttling her. Instead, I kept up my role of Edward's girlfriend and tried not to snarl at Rosalie often but sometimes it was just exhausting. It helped that everyone else seemed to be fine with me sitting with them and, while it was nice, I wished that I could have escaped to the familiar, comfortable confines of my truck instead.

“So, Bella, any exciting plans for the weekend?” Alice asked me one day as she nibbled delicately on a carrot stick. Her inky black hair was sticking out in every direction, shocking against her alabaster skin. Her boyfriend, Jasper, had his arm slung lazily over the back of her chair, sucking Dr. Pepper through a straw, looking content as always. His eyelids were at half mast, with only a little blue sparkling through. Emmett and Rosalie had been whispering to each other but stopped when Alice spoke.

“I’m going to Port Angeles,” I replied, picking at my sandwich. “There’s a band I want to see.”

Edward stiffened next to me and frowned.

“I like live music!” Alice chirped. Her eyes were the color of topaz and glittered almost eerily under the harsh fluorescent lighting. “What are they called? Maybe we could all go.”

I hid a tight smile, squashing down images of poor sweet Alice getting pummeled in a mosh pit. Alice was nice and I liked her but I couldn’t help myself. “You wouldn’t recognize the name. It’s a hardcore band. You know, rough. Sort of like punk.”
“Sounds… mean.” She studied another carrot stick before popping it in her mouth. “It doesn’t sound like something I would like.”

“It’s not for everyone,” I agreed, wryly.

“You didn’t tell me you wanted to go to Port Angeles,” Edward grumbled angrily in my ear.

I looked at him, surprised. “I didn’t know I had to.”

“Is that asshole going to be there?”

Rolling my eyes, I shrugged. “Don’t know and don’t care.”

“I’ll go with you.”

“You don’t need to,” I shot back. “I don’t need you to babysit me and I know you don’t like that kind of music.”

“You do need babysitting,” Edward retorted, running a hand through his chestnut hair, exasperated. I could see the sharp line of his jaw pulse as he spoke. “You have an uncanny ability to get into… trouble.”

“And by “trouble” he means “fights”,” Rosalie interrupted, a little gleefully. I ignored her.

“I’m going to the show,” I told Edward firmly. “You can’t tell me what I can and cannot do.”

“I’m not trying to!” he protested, his brows coming together, irritated. “I’m just trying to keep you out of trouble.”

I dropped the bread I had been playing with onto the tray and glared at him. “Edward, I am a big girl. What are you going to do if people start moshing around or something? Beat up everyone in a ten foot radius?”

Rosalie laughed. “He’d probably like that.”

“Rose, shut up,” Edward snapped. The azure of Rosalie’s eyes frosted over and she huffed, shifting a perfect wave of corn silk hair behind her shoulder as she looked at Emmett, silently demanding he step in. Emmett frowned at his brother.

“Edward –“ Emmett cut in warningly. “You promised not to be a dick to Rosie anymore.”
“Then tell her not to be such a bitch.”

Another exasperated huff slipped from her lips and I quickly shoved some scattered notebooks into my bag before I slid my chair away from the table and stood up. Everyone looked at me, surprised. I wasn't in the mood for the Rosalie & Edward Show. Even Jasper’s eyes widened a little. He shot me a small smile, like he didn’t blame me for fleeing. Why can't anything be easy?/ (why can't everything be easy?)/ You wanted out, 'fore you/ Get pulled, right the fuck back...

“I’ll be in my truck,” I said to Edward and gave Rosalie a pointed stare. “I’d like to relax for a few minutes before History and this… bickering isn’t exactly making me feel all Zen and shit.”

Edward called after me as I stormed away and I saw Lauren and Jessica exchange a triumphant glance a few tables over. Annoyance rippled through me and I gritted my teeth, throwing the heavy lunchroom doors open viciously, stuffing my earbuds into my ears as I headed to the parking lot. Take all your reasons and take them away/ To the middle of nowhere, and on your way home/ Throw from your window your record collection/
They all run together and never make sense.


Fifteen minutes and five songs later I was finally beginning to relax. The air inside the cab was chilly and I tugged my hood over my knotted hair, drawing it over my eyes, comforted by the darkness as I wriggled my back against the driver side door, stretching my legs across the bench seat. I didn’t want to go back inside the school and debated just cutting for the rest of the day but knew I couldn’t. Charlie would kill me.

Charlie still hadn’t forgiven me for my outburst at the diner and I was worried that the icy silence between us would continue until I finally graduated and moved out. I hoped if I kept up my good behavior he would warm up to me again but, as one week slid into the next without me getting in trouble, I was starting to have my doubts.

A movement disrupted my thoughts and it took me a split second to understand that I was the thing that was moving. I realized I was falling backward before I heard the screech of the door hinges. Blinded by my hood, I threw my arms out, scrabbling to catch on to something before I tumbled out of the truck and onto my head. A startled shriek burst from my lips even as strong arms were wrapping around me, stopping my fall.

“The fuck?!” I yelled, yanking my hood off. Edward looked down at me, faintly amused.

“I should have known you’d have those stupid ear plugs in,” he said, helping me right myself. “I assumed you heard me knocking on the window.”

I glowered at him. “If I had heard you knocking I would have sat up.”

Edward grinned. “I guess I didn’t think that far ahead.”

“Uh huh. You totally did that on purpose.”

“Maybe,” he agreed, his voice mischievous. “Anyway, I came to get you so you’re not late to class.”

“Thanks, I guess.” I grabbed my knapsack and hopped out of the truck. A chilly light drizzle was falling, icy pricks against any exposed flesh. I shivered and pulled my hood up again.

Edward was silent until we entered the school, his fingers drumming against my wrist. I noticed that he never really held my hand. Instead, he just kept a steady touch, or curled his fingers lightly around my wrist. I was going to call him out on it when he stopped and turned to me, his expression serious.

“I want you to know that I’m not trying to tell you what to do and I’m sorry you feel that way. There is just something about that guy that makes me uncomfortable. I swear he’s up to no good. It was like I could read his mind, that first day I ran into you in Port Angeles. It makes me nervous.” Edward licked his lips and I momentarily lost my train of thought as it shifted to ideas of other things Edward could lick. I shook my head, dispelling the mental image.

I sighed and gave him a wan smile. “Edward, I appreciate the concern but I’m going to that show, whether you want me to or not. I wish you wouldn’t worry so much.”

“I’d like to come.”

“You aren’t going to have a good time.”

“I might.” He arched his eyebrows at me, a small smile on his lips. “You never know.”

“Fine,” I grumbled. Edward grabbed my hand and kissed it.

“Have fun in History,” he called as he sauntered away. I laughed, surreptitiously glancing down at my hand, where I could still feel the warmth of his lips.

I carried that thought with me as I sat down, spreading my books on my desk and ignoring the daggers Lauren was glaring in my direction. I wasn’t uncomfortable under her gaze and I didn’t even care that she talked about me behind my back. If she said it to my face, however, that was a different story.

And fear is not respect/ Correct/ But it's the best you're gonna get/ Sharp blow to the bridge of the nose/ Sharp blow and anything goes (Elbow – Little Beast).I knew what they all said about me. Most of the rumors were crazy or outlandish. I’d heard that I’d been in jail or a mental institution. It was whispered that I was sent to Charlie after viciously attacking my mom and putting her in the hospital. I was on drugs. Others were more simple, like I was just really mean. Which wasn’t exactly rumor when you thought about it.

The rumors and whispers were actually helpful and I saw no need to dispel them. If there was one thing that I learned from being the perpetual New Girl it was that kids are not nice. At all. Being the new kid is like going to prison for the first time. The best way to survive is to go up to biggest and baddest guy on the cell block and punch him in the eye. At least, that’s what I saw on TV.

High school is a lot like prison. The scarier you are, the more people will leave you alone. And I liked being left alone.

My thoughts faded in and out as the teacher droned on about the Revolutionary War and I absently doodled on my notebook. By the time the bell ran the margin of my paper was covered with intricate, even curlicues.

Edward was waiting for me after class, leaning against a row of lockers. A freshman hovered nearby, obviously trying to get into a locker that Edward was blocking but apparently too scared to ask. Edward eyed the younger boy up and bared his teeth in a predatory grin.

“Problem?” he asked, cocking his head lazily at the boy--he couldn’t have been older than fourteen. His tone was calm but cold, dangerous. The kid shook his head and bolted.

“What was that about?” I asked as he put his arm across my shoulders.

Edward shrugged. “All he had to do was say ‘excuse me,’ but since he was a chicken shit he didn’t. I couldn’t help myself. I can’t stand pussies.”

I snorted. “I was just thinking about how mean people can be and that was fucking malicious,” I told him. “I mean, shit, I know I’m a total jerk but I wouldn’t go around harassing kids for no reason.”

“Oh well.” Edward seemed absolutely unperturbed by his behavior. Before I could say anything, he stopped and kissed my cheek. I looked through the double doors that led into gymnasium and groaned.

“Ugh, gym,” I griped. “My favorite. At least it’s floor hockey today.”

“Well, don’t get into any fights,” Edward replied, that same crooked smile playing on his face.

I laughed. “Don’t jinx me.”

As much as I hated gym, I did like hockey. It had always been a favorite of mine. There was something very empowering about running around with a giant stick.

In Phoenix, floor hockey was separated by gender, and boys and girls did not play against each other. Forks just threw us all into together and, more often than not, the girls cowered against the wall as the boys beat the shit out of each other on the floor. As I headed out of the locker room, I noticed that both Jessica and Lauren were inching their way across the gym, looking for a safe refuge as the boys banged their sticks on the ground and called out taunts to each other. I grinned and took my place on the floor.

“Okay kids,” Coach Clapp hollered over the din of chatter. “Play fair and NO excessive physical contact. Understood?”

Everyone grumbled their agreement and he blew the whistle. Immediately, the puck whizzed past my face and I spun and raced after it. I caught up quickly and swept my stick across the floor, sending the puck in the other direction. Tyler Crowley on the opposing team blocked it and spun the puck right back in my direction. I lunged, catching control of it once again and passed it to Mike Newton, my breath heaving.

“Nice, Swan!” Mike yelled at me as he agilely got control of the puck and ran down toward the opposing team’s goal. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Lauren and Jess whispering as I sprinted by them, my focus on the game.

Out of nowhere, I saw a hockey stick moving, tripping up my feet. My momentum was too much and I hit the floor like a ton of bricks, sliding across it painfully on my shoulder, my teeth clacking together from the impact. Over the din of female guffawing I heard the Coach blow the whistle.

“Swan!” he yelled, over to me from across the gym. “You okay?”

I gritted my teeth against the pain and got to my feet as I retrieved the stick from the ground. Jessica and Lauren were still giggling in their corner and I wanted to wipe Lauren’s smirk right off her pretty little face. With my hockey stick.

“You wanna play games, Lauren?” I asked in a deadly voice. They stopped laughing, their faces going white as I approached, brandishing my hockey stick. “I’ve got a game for you.”

“Bella, don’t!” A familiar female voice said in my ear. I felt a cool hand grip my wrist and I tried to yank away, turning and finding myself face to face with Rosalie. She jerked on my wrist again and I hissed. Rosalie’s eyes flashed.

“Why are you going to get yourself expelled over two cunts?” she asked loudly.

“Hey!” Jessica yelped, offended.

“You’re fucking stupid to even be messing with her, Stanley. Don’t think I’m doing this for you.” Rosalie looked back to me and lowered her voice. “Seriously, Bella, is it worth it? What the fuck is the point? Who the fuck cares about those vacuous twits. Don’t be stupid.”

I stared at her for a moment as her words processed and I realized that she wasn’t in gym clothes. That was all I needed to snap out of it.

“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked her curiously, eyeing up her tight jeans and expensive looking sweater."And why are you to help me out?"

Rosalie shrugged. “Dropping some papers off for the Coach. I have office duty this period.” She didn't respond to my second question and I could tell by her expression she wasn't planning to.

“Oh.”

“You’re welcome,” she said pointedly, raising a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. A few people were staring at us but Lauren had gotten brave again and was whining to the Coach about how I had tried to assault her. Thankfully, the Coach didn’t see anything and brushed her off.

“Thanks,” I muttered.

“You and Edward with your tempers,” Rosalie sighed dramatically. “I can’t wait to see how this relationship turns out. I sure hope you don’t crash and burn. Or kill each other, for that matter.” Then she turned and walked away, leaving me standing there alone, clutching a hockey stick and wearing a stupefied expression.
_____________________________

“Rosalie said you tried to decapitate Lauren in gym class.”

I laughed and rolled over on my bed to look at Edward. He was sitting in my computer chair, his feet up on the rickety old desk, grinning at me.

“I wasn’t going to decapitate her,” I retorted, returning his smile and patting my bedspread, motioning for him to join me. “I was just going to knock a few teeth out.”

“Rose is lucky you didn’t knock her teeth out.” Edward crawled into my bed and pulled me to him, shifting so he was lying down and I was on top of him. I propped my weight on my elbows and leaned in to nuzzle his nose.

“Mmm,” I murmured. “That she is.” Then I remembered what Rose had said. “She also said you and I had tempers and that she hoped we didn’t crash and burn.” I left out the part about us killing each other.

Edward froze beneath me. “She what?” he asked in a scathing voice.

“It’s nothing. Just ignore her.” I kissed his lips but he didn’t respond. Frowning, I looked at him. “Now what’s your problem?” I huffed. “Forget about Rosalie.”

Edward hesitated and I took the opportunity to nibble at his neck, giving him small, slow kisses until I felt his body relax again.

“You’re right,” he whispered, reaching up and caressing my hair. “I have far more important things to think about. Like you.”

I smiled and he pulled me down into a kiss.

“Ahem,” a gruff voice coughed from the door way. I flipped off of Edward, nearly falling off the bed in the process as Edward hurriedly sat up. Charlie was standing by my partially open door, looking quietly mutinous.

“Bella, your mother is on the phone,” he said, his disapproving gaze sliding from me to Edward and hardening. Edward had enough grace to look chagrined.

“I don’t want to talk to her,” I told him in a pleading voice. “Can you just tell her I’m not here? Or in the shower?”

Charlie sighed. “No. Go downstairs and talk to her. You can’t keep avoiding her calls.”

I tried to keep my features calm and neutral as I stood and stomped out of the room.

Charlie and Edward followed me to the kitchen and I picked up the phone.

“Hello?” I said dully.

“Bella!” My mother’s shrill voice pierced my ear and I brought the phone away from it, wincing. I knew both Edward and Charlie were eavesdropping and I didn’t care.

“What?”

“How are you, darling? Did you get my present?” Renee was oblivious to the chill of my voice.

“Yes. Thanks.”

“Oh, good! Oh, before I forget - Charlie says you have a boyfriend now! I'm so surprised!”

I eyed Charlie, one brow raised and he coughed and looked away. “Oh, he said that, did he? Well, I suppose I do.”

Renee completely ignored my response and launched into something banal, blabbering on about how wonderful life was in Florida and I just stood there like a statue, focusing on breathing, trying not to listen to her words. Edward watched in silence, his eyes dark.

“That’s great, Mom,” I said through clenched teeth. “Um, listen I have to go so – “

“Okay, Bella,” Renee interrupted, sounding distracted. “I bet you probably want to get your homework done so you can see that new boy. Just listen to me, honey, and be careful. Use protection! God knows you don’t want to make the same mistake I did.”

Charlie’s eyes widened and a small groan escaped his lips.

A sharp, painful sensation encased my body and my fingers curled tightly around the receiver of the phone in a stranglehold.

“Mistake?” I laughed bitterly into the phone. “Did you actually just call me a mistake?”

“Er, honey, that’s not-“

“Why are you calling me, Mom?” the word was drenched in acidic sarcasm. “To tell me how wonderful your life is? To remind me how much better off you are now that I’m not around? How fucking happy you are that I’m not your problem anymore?” My voice rose in volume and turned frosty. With a pained look in his eyes, Charlie tried to shush me but I turned away, my whole body trembling.

“Bella!” Renee admonished. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Nothing,” I sneered. “It’s none of your fucking business, you fucking bitch.”

“That’s enough.” Charlie tried to grab the phone from me and I ducked out of his reach. My mother said something but I couldn’t listen to her anymore. I wanted to reach through the phone and slap her.

“Don’t call me again, Renee,” I yelled into the phone. “Just do me one last fucking favor and never talk to me again.” No matter which way you go/ No matter which way you stay/ You're out of my mind, out of my mind/ Out of my mind, out of my mind/ I was walking with a ghost...

Charlie finally wrestled the phone out of my hand and motioned for me to go sit in the living room. Edward reached out toward me but I shook him off and flounced over to the couch.

“Jesus Christ, Renee, what were you thinking?” I heard Charlie hiss into the phone. “I knew you were selfish but…” a pause, then Charlie’s voice got louder. “She’s a teenager, for Chrissakes! She needs a parent!... I did not poison her against you!” I strained to hear Renee’s voice but couldn’t.

Then Charlie’s tone iced over completely. “That is her choice, Renee. You’ve left me in charge of her. When you called you told me you needed me to take in Bella because you were in between jobs and didn’t have enough money. You lied to me, Renee but what you’ve done to your daughter is even worse.” The phone gave one last feeble chirp before Charlie slammed it down.

“You.” He pointed at Edward then jerked his thumb toward the door. “Go home.”

Then he looked at me. “Don’t move. We need to talk.”

“Why am I in trouble for this?” I snarled. “She’s a bitch and I told you I didn’t want to talk to her.“

I crossed my arms over my chest, biting my lower lip to keep from screaming at Charlie. My body was still shaking but I felt scarily calm. Numb. As soon as the thought crossed my mind, however, Renee’s words came back to me. Her cheery voice as she described how happy she and Phil were in hot, sunny Florida. I looked out the bay window of the living room, into the dark gloom and green wetness of Forks and another surge of hatred coursed through me. Charlie was watching me cautiously and I shot him a black look. I opened my mouth to say something but he made a rude noise at me.

“Bella, be quiet for one goddamned second. Please.” Charlie rubbed his face tiredly. “You’re not in trouble.”

“Bella, I’ll call you in a little bit, okay?” Edward stood awkwardly and leaned over to kiss my cheek, ignoring the low growl that came from Charlie. I didn’t pull away but I wanted to, which made me feel even worse. My skin prickled uncomfortably and I shivered a little, wrapping my arms around myself. Nothing felt right. There's a war inside of me/ Do I cause new heartbreak to write a new broken song/ Do I push it down or let it run me right into the ground/ I feel like I wouldn't like me if I met me/ Well I can't stop talking for fear of listening to unwelcome sound...

“’Kay,” I replied, still glowering at Charlie as he ushered Edward out the door. He stood there for a few moments even after the door had shut behind Edward. With a heavy sigh, Charlie finally came back and slumped into his favorite armchair.

“Bella,” he began and I opened my mouth to interrupt. He held up his finger. “Listen to me for just one second.

“If you don’t want to talk to your Mother ever again that is your prerogative. I won’t interfere. If she calls I’ll tell her your unavailable. However, I will also let you know each time she tries to contact you and leave the choice up to you.”

“I’m never talking to her again,” I spat.

Charlie looked at me, sadly. “When you were a baby you were so… stubborn. Just like you are now. But you were a lot happier back then, I guess. I wish I had done things differently for you, Bella. Maybe if I had stepped in, maybe if I had tried to convince Renee to leave you with me everything would have turned out differently. Better.”

“Convince?”

“When your mother left me, I offered to take you. I could tell Renee was restless, I saw how quickly she lost interest in… everything. First it was art class, then yoga, then guitar lessons. Then me.” Charlie’s eyes clouded over and he was silent for a second, lost in his own memories. “Renee called me about a year and a half after she left. You were probably about six and she asked me to take you in, just for a little bit. I said no.

“I learned later that she had left you with some neighbors for six months.”

“The McKays,” I whispered. “They had a son my age.”

Charlie sighed again. “Listen, kid. I don’t regret much in my life, but there isn’t a day that goes by that I wish I had agreed. I know I’m not your Dad, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you like you’re my own.”

I couldn’t breathe. I just stared at Charlie in shock. Finally, my brain shifted gears and I choked out a weak, “Thanks, Charlie. That means a lot to me.”

A dreadful awkward silence ensued. I shuffled my feet for a moment before hopping up from the couch. Charlie was still leaning against the door frame, watching me with a sad but wary expression. I approached him, intent on sliding past him when I changed my mind. Impulsively, I threw my arms around his waist and hugged him.

Charlie returned the hug and sighed. “You’re a good kid, Bells, even if you are a damn trouble maker. I just wish I knew how to take some of your anger away."

“It’s okay,” I mumbled into his flannel shirt. “I’ll figure it out somehow.”

Before Charlie could say another word, I released him and raced up to my bedroom. Along the way, I tried to remember the last time Renee told me she loved me.

I couldn’t.

_______________________________________________

Author's Notes:

Dear Snarkier Than You - thanks as always for reading this shit. And making me write it. Love you!

Hey kids! Sorry, no lemons. I blow, I know.

Don't worry, Edward and Bella are going to have a little more, ahem, "alone time" in the next chapter. And quite possibly some explosions... in more ways than one. ;)

Please feel free to leave comments!

I will also post this at FanFiction.net shortly. Like tomorrow.

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Title - Run, Devil, Run - Jenny Lewis & The Watson Twins

Lyrics
Spit on a Stranger - Pavement
Easy Eats or Dirty Doctor Galapagos - Man Man
Looking for Astronauts - The National
Walking with a Ghost - Tegan & Sara
You wouldn't like me - Tegan & Sara