I've missed you. Truly.
I have finally emerged from under my mountain of used tissues and self-pity to officially rejoin not only real life (grudgingly) but Twitardia (yay!!!!). I'm not quite sure which plague I contracted but it kicked my ass enough that I actually took over-the-counter medicine, which is something I usually don't do and not because I'm organic and healthy, either. It's because I'm irrational and totally paranoid. I'm convinced that I'm going to have some adverse reaction to say, Tylenol, and my skin is going to fall off in sheets or I'll end up pooping out my liver or something so I usually just suck it up and deal with whatever it is that's putting a damper on my life.
Not this time, though. Yesterday morning I shuffled my pathetic ass to the medicine cabinet, grabbed the box of Alka-Seltzer Cold & Sinus, read the directions carefully, including possible side effects (I was convinced I had all of them immediately) and dutifully took them the entire day. Annnnnd nothing. It was only this morning when I shook the packet of pills out of the box that I realized why.
They weren't Alka-Seltzer Cold & Sinus. They were Gas-X.
Extra Strength Gas-fucking-X. I guess that explains why I was less farty than usual yesterday.
Apparently some ass-wipe put the wrong pills in the box. I'd look up the side effects of overdosing on Gas-X but the last time I went to Web MD to diagnose an ingrown hair I was convinced I had herpes, cancer and some rare genetic disease all at the same time and that I was going to die right-fucking-now and I flipped the fuck out and ML had to physically stop me from scrawling my Last Will & Testament on the back of a receipt but then I smoked a few cigarettes and finally calmed down. But if my fucking intestines get all hard and I have to walk around with a colostomy bag** I can tell you right now I'm dumping that thing out in inappropriate places.
Anyway, because I was a non-farty-but-total-sneezy-hacky mess yesterday I didn't go to work. Instead, I felt sorry for myself and surfed around looking for some videos.
First the funny. It's a little dorky but there are some really funny parts, especially the end but it's definitely worth watching for the laughs.
I also discovered this little gem via TwilightBlog. I am always so fucking impressed that people can make these videos. I think it took me about 3 hours to edit our 4 second clip to ReelzChannel and I nearly broke the Mac in my frustration. So, kudos to everyone who makes all the awesome videos we post here.
Not to beat a dead horse but dammit I wish they had kept Rachelle Lefevre. She was such an awesome badass Victoria. Plus, I want that outfit she wore in the chase scene in New Moon. Except that I would probably look like a homeless Munchkin rather than a hot vampire if I was wearing it.
I was going to continue into my foray of Eclipse videos when I found this next one and holy shit is this good. It's Lykke Li's Possibility set against a short movie. Very simple, very poignant and totally touched that soft spot in my heart that doesn't get touched very much, mainly because I'm an asshole.
Normally, Snarkier Than You handles the videos around here, mainly because my general attention span caps off at about fifty seconds but I hope I did ya all proud. STY's off celebrating something called an 'Anniversary', whatever that is (ML and I are the two least romantic people EVER. We've been together for over four years and it only recently occurred to us that we don't celebrate shit like this) so y'all stuck with my cranky ass tonight.
And on that note - I think I'm going to
** NEVER Google image search this. Especially not while you're eating dinner. You've been warned.