Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Osa Bella - Chapter 16 "BiPolar" [Twilight FanFiction]



Howdy! Welcome to the next installment of Osa Bella. Sorry I am a little late tonight with this update. Sleep deprivation + work + babies + oh, fuck the excuses anyway. It doesn't matter now.

In some other news, Osa Bella is going to be part of the Fandom Gives Back fundraiser for Alex's Lemonade Stand. For those of you who might be interested in an Edward Point of View outtake of Osa Bella, stay tuned because that's what you'll get if you want to donate to the cause. A team is being set up for those of you interested in playing along, and we'll let you know as soon as we have all the pertinent info on that ourselves.

If .pdfs float your boat, you can download Chapter 16 right here.


I say something along these lines every time I post, but I have to say it again. The best part of Osa Bella is you. Thank you for sharing in this experience with me-it is turning out to be so much more than I ever expected. I am a sap. A sap with an ardent love of sarcasm, yes, but a sap all the same. I'll see you all in the comments.


xo,
Myg


Oh PS: If you're so inclined, please stop by OB at fanfiction.net and give love. Mr. Myg is now addicted to checking OB stats. And yeah, I named my story after a tampon. Sorry.






CHAPTER 16

BiPolar

Edward didn't come to school after the Lake Crescent camping trip and I was glad. My dream of him, and us and the death of the spirit bear had been a stark warning from my unconscious mind, and I was determined to heed it this time. Don't go near him, the dream said. He's dangerous.

I think I always knew he was a danger to me. Not because I thought he'd ever hurt me, but because he awakened something in me that felt hedonistic and out of control. The dream told me I had allowed my love for Edward to dwell far too close to the surface. I was going to have to dig a hole in my heart and bury it there alive if I could find no way to kill it.

Derek and I talked about Jesus and faith and how that would figure into our relationship moving forward. He understood my concern about his boundaries with the students and I understood his concern that I respect his faith, and I did. But that argument pulled back the cloak of my optimism and revealed a grittier side to all the compromising I'd been doing in our relationship. He believed I had embraced his faith as my own, and he was more than disappointed to find that wasn't true.

Edward came back to school a little over a week after the camping trip. The morning he came back I saw him pull into the parking lot as I was walking into the building. He made no eye contact with me. No small wave. No casual good morning smile. He was avoiding me but I didn't understand why.

It's for the best, I told myself. Don't read into it.

I went inside and picked up my mail. There was a memo from Red on top.

"Faculty and Staff: Do not allow students to go into the woods behind school property. This is a directive from Forks Police Department. Aggressive bear activity has been reported in the vicinity of Forks. Parents are being advised not to allow students in the woods unsupervised. This advisory is in effect until further notice."

We'd been tracking bear activity in the Thoreau Club since the fall and this was the first time any aggressive behavior had been reported. I called Charlie.

"Yeah Bells, we had an incident in town late last night. A black bear attacked a guy coming out of the Mill. It was late, but he messed him up pretty bad. He's in the hospital."

"Oh no," I said. "Why did he get attacked?"

"I don't know," Charlie said. "He swears he wasn't provoking it, but he was pretty buzzed, so who knows?"

Red knocked on my door and stuck his head in. He nodded as though he had some urgent matter to speak to me about, so I got off the phone with Charlie.

“I need to speak to you about the Cullen kid,” he said.

Oh shit, I thought as my mind raced back through the many transgressions I had made when it came to Edward. What was it going to be?

“Which one?” I asked.

“Edward. We got a tip from Mike Newton that he stole all the formaldehyde from Banner’s lab.”

“Really? You’re going off something Newton said about Edward Cullen? Mike hates Edward because his girlfriend has a crush on him.”

“Still, I want to get to the bottom of this.”

“Did Derek report it missing?”

“Yes, this morning.”

“But why would Edward do that?”

“Drugs,” he said. “I find this kid to be really disturbing, Bella. Like, he could be a dealer, or maybe a shooter, you know?”

“Edward is no drug dealer and he’s certainly not a school shooter.”

“Just talk to him.” 

“Why doesn’t Dale do it? He’s the disciplinarian, not me.”

“Edward will talk to you.”

“So you’re asking me to use my relationship with the kid to fish for information that might get him arrested?”

“I’m not asking you. I’m telling you.”

#

After the bell I walked down the hall to Derek’s room and looked through the crowd of hurried students for Edward, thinking I could grab him before class and clear the whole thing up. I saw him duck into Derek's room, again ignoring me, even though I was right across the hall from him and I knew he'd seen me. I was about to get him when Jessica stopped me.

“Miss Swan I need to talk to you. It’s about Mike.”

“Sure Jess. Can you come see me after this period?”

“I don’t think it can wait. Mike and I broke up last night. He seems really depressed and I’m not sure what to do.”

“I’ll get him after class, ok?”

“Okay," she said. "I'm really worried."

"Thanks for letting me know,” I said.

I knocked on Derek’s door and heard his annoyed response. I stuck my head in. “What do you need, Miss Swan?” he asked.

“I need Edward.”

“Really?” Derek looked over at Edward, who was staring at me with a murderous glare. Derek noticed it as well and gave Edward a warning look. “Will he be coming back?”

“Not sure,” I said and gave Edward a smile, but it didn’t put a dent in his sour countenance. He looked hatefully at me. Something really wasn’t right.

“Mr. Cullen, you’re excused. Come see me for the homework assignment before the end of the day,” Derek said.

Edward hesitated. For a moment I thought he was either going to hit something or throw up. Instead he gathered his books and then walked swiftly past me with his head down and waited in the hall.

"I have to talk to you privately. Can we go to my office?" I asked.

“No,” he said. "We can't."

What the hell was wrong with him? He'd never been this difficult, with anyone, let alone me.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Well, we have to talk."

"We'll have to talk outside then."

"Okay, fine," I said, impatiently.

Edward walked down the hall and out of the school and I followed him, trailing behind at a good distance.

“Are you coming or not?” he asked as he stood at the trailhead leading into the woods behind the school. I pointed to the picnic tables off to the side of the building. He gave me a frustrated look and then walked over and took a seat and pulled out a cigarette.

“You can't smoke that on school grounds,” I said.

He lit the cigarette anyway, taking a long drag and blowing it out into the sky.

“What do you want?" he asked.

“Look, I know this is going to sound stupid, but there’s a rumor that maybe you’re lifting formaldehyde from Derek’s lab,” I said.

“Mike Newton told you that?”

“No,” I said. “Is it true?”

“Yeah, it is.” He sat down and was leaning back on his elbows, perching casually on the picnic table, eyeing the cloud cover overhead.

“Really?” I was totally surprised by this. “Why the hell would you do that, Edward?”

“You’ll never believe me.”

“Try me.”

He took a drag off his cigarette. “If I didn’t take it, Mike was going to take it.”

“And do what with it?”

“Nothing good,” he said. “I told you that kid wasn’t stable.”

“Do you have proof?”

“Not the kind anyone will accept.”

“You’re making a serious accusation. If you don’t give me evidence, you’re going to be in big trouble for this, even if what you’re saying is true.”

“I don’t have any evidence that Mr. Colter or Mr. Dale will believe. I don’t care if I’m in trouble.”

“I mean police trouble, Edward.”

“I know.”

“Just tell me how you know,” I said. “I’ll believe you.”

He looked at me for a moment, thinking.

“Come on, Edward. You can tell me,” I said.

“I can hear people’s thoughts," he said.

“Seriously.”

“I am serious. I know for a fact that Mike is the one who said I took the formaldehyde because I heard him think it. And I know he was going try to make an explosive with it, which he can’t do, but he doesn’t know that.”

I stood there, stunned. I had no response. Was Edward in the middle of some kind of parapsychotic episode? Grandiose thinking? Maybe he was manic. That would explain the soft signs of aggression he was displaying. Maybe it would explain the theft too. That must be it.

“I knew you wouldn’t believe me," he said. "So just do whatever you have to do, it doesn't matter anymore.”

"Of course it matters," I said. "Have you been sleeping okay?"

"I told you I don't sleep."

"How many hours do you sleep a night?"

He shook his head in frustration. "Are we finished? Do you need to call your father now or something so I can be questioned? I'm done talking to you about this."

The breeze picked up and I felt it blow warmly across my neck as my hair flew across my face. I pushed it from my eyes when suddenly Edward lurched off the table.

“Are you all right?” I asked.

He glared at me then, again with a murderous stare. “Edward?” I couldn’t deal with the intensity of his anger. I stepped towards him to close the distance. He stepped back from me and put a hand out in warning. He looked paler than I’d ever seen him. His eyes were black orbs, hollow with anger.

“Don’t come any closer.”

“What’s wrong? Are you sick?”

"I knew it was too soon to come back." He closed his eyes and shook his head and staggered back another step. “Get back inside.” He glared at me. “Now.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I asked.

Then he turned and disappeared into the woods, right where he shouldn't go. I walked up the path after him but I saw no trace of him anywhere.

“Edward?” I called, picking up my pace. “Where are you?” I hurried along, deeper into the woods, hoping I wouldn't run into any bears. Red was really going to give me hell now. All I needed was to lose a student out here after last night's bear attack.

I don’t know how far up the trail I was when I heard a sickening guttural sound, sort of like a wild animal struggling. I pulled my cell phone from my pocket and dialed the office.

“Put Red on the phone,” I told Doreen.

“What is it Bella?” Red said, impatient.

“Red—I lost Edward. He’s sick or something—he ran off into the woods. I heard an awful noise just now. You’ve got to send someone out here right away. Get Derek.”

“You lost him? Damn it, Bella. There are directives from your father, nobody is to be in the woods behind the school. Where are you?”

“I’m looking for him.”

“Well get back here right now. That’s an order.”

“I think something is really wrong with him. He might be having a manic episode. Call Dr. Cullen. I’m just off the trail, up about twenty yards.”

I hung up and kept picking my way through the forest. I kept calling out for him, but heard nothing.

I heard an animal, maybe a deer, dart through the trees behind me. I jumped, startled, and then tripped over a tree root the size of my calf. I stumbled hard and fell to the ground.

Searing, shooting pain spread up my leg from my ankle, causing me to cry out as my body surged, sickened with adrenaline. I felt around my ankle and it started to swell and then my entire leg began to throb. The skin on the top of my foot burned where it had been abraded by the bark of the tree root. Blood dripped onto my pants, my shoe. My face was streaming with tears as I began to carefully pick bark out of the cuts.

My phone rang. I took it from my pocket and was about to answer when it was suddenly ripped from my hand.

“Shhh….” Edward whispered as he took the phone and covered my mouth with his hand. It was just like my dream of him, I thought. He took his hand from my mouth and leaned over me. His eyes had changed color again, from black to amber. How could that be? He silently motioned for me to look into the distance where an enormous dark shadow was lurking. A black bear. Maybe even the black bear from the attack last night.

“Are you hurt?” he asked quietly.

“Shouldn’t we make a bunch of noise or something, so it gets frightened away?”

“Not this time.”

“Mr. Colter and Derek are on the trail looking for us—go find them and they’ll come for me. You need to get out of here now.”

“Forget it,” he said, and lifted me into his arms.

“That really hurts,” I said, as my body tensed from the movement.

“Oh my God—you're bleeding.” His body went rigid as his eyes caught sight of my bloody foot. Was he afraid of blood? His eyes went swimming back into his head. He buried his nose in my hair and inhaled deeply, making me breathless and uncomfortable. A low groan escaped from his lips and my heart raced.

“Where are we going?” I asked, a hint of panic in my voice.

“What kind of a question is that?” He sounded annoyed. “Where do you think I’m taking you?”

“I’m in a lot of pain,” I said.

“Do you think you broke it?” he asked.

“I don’t know but it really, really hurts.”

He sat me down on the ground and looked at my foot.

“Can you move it?” he asked.

I tried but it hurt too much.

“Okay, don’t move it. Let me see.”

He unstrapped my shoe and carefully removed it, but got blood on his hand, which made him stop. He was absolutely motionless looking at the small spot of my blood on his palm. Then he brought his hand to his face and took a deep breath and appeared to almost shake. He turned his head to look at me, a terrifying look about him.

“Edward? What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing,” he shook his head. “Nothing is wrong. Everything is just fine.”

It wasn’t me he was trying to convince, that much I could see. He pulled another cigarette out of his pack and lit it, inhaling deeply.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “It’s just that, well, it’s hard to explain.”

I looked over his shoulder and saw the bear had suddenly turned its attention toward us, and then cocked its head, almost like it had recognized who we were. Then it started lumbering through the woods in our direction, aggressively.

“Edward, run!” I cried.

He gave me a hard, pained look and then stood up. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. Don’t move.”

Then he was gone.

#

I tried to remember what Charlie told me about surviving bear attacks, but the only thing I could remember in my intense panic was that you should hang up your garbage when you camp to try to avoid them, and it was too late for that. So I just did what I thought was my best hope. I played dead.

Tears stung my eyes as I tried to lie still, but my heart was racing so hard I was absolutely certain they could hear it all the way in the school yard. There was no way this bear was going to believe I was dead if I couldn’t find a way to calm myself.

I lay there, silent, hoping that either the bear would buy my charade and leave me alone, or that it would have the decency to kill me quickly. One thing I did not want to contemplate was death by bear mauling.

I could feel the bear drawing near and heard its footsteps plodding ever more quickly in my direction. Then I heard something else. A gust of wind rustling the undergrowth. The bear roared, angry as something else caught its attention. Then I heard a grotesque thud followed by a sickening, pain-filled roar.

I opened my eyes and saw Edward hauling the bear off into the woods. It was almost a repeat of my dream, but I was certain I was awake. Was I hallucinating? Yes, the pain and the stress combined must have induced hallucinations. Perfect.

“Bella!” I heard Derek call out from several yards away. “Where are you?”

“I’m over here!” I cried out, my voice breaking as I waited for him and Red to reach where I lay on the ground.

But there was no way I was going to explain to Derek or Red or anyone what I'd seen. I had no desire for my boss or my fiancé to know I was hallucinating. If I was teetering on the edge of madness, it was for me to know and nobody else to find out.

#

In the Emergency Room, Dr. Cullen confirmed that I’d broken my ankle, and when I had a few minutes alone with him, I shared my concern about Edward's mental status.

"I'm very concerned," I said. "Does he have any history of bipolar disorder?"

"No, why?"

"Well, this is a typical age of onset, and today he stole from the school, and then he told me he can read minds. He also admitted he's not sleeping. Have you noticed any significant changes in his behavior?"

"Hmmm," he said. "I will definitely have him evaluated."

"I think you should," I said. "He's got such a bright future, and I would hate to see him in trouble over this. If he's manic, it's not his fault."

"Thank you, Miss Swan," he said. "I appreciate your concern."

I came home with a cast, a bottle of Percocet and orders to stay off my feet for a week. But I had no intention of staying home alone with my growing anxiety and a bottle of pain killers.

After bringing me home from the hospital, Derek made dinner and we sat on my couch watching the news. He’d been strange all afternoon. Distant. Like he was annoyed with me, but I had no idea why.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I don't understand you sometimes," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"How could you run off into the woods after a student you knew had stolen dangerous chemicals? Especially after Red put out that memo about the bear warning?"

"I was afraid he was manic," I said.

"Weren't you afraid for your own safety?"

"No," I said.

He got up and took my plate and carried it into the kitchen. He came back and sat at the opposite end of the couch.

"So, you're mad at me?"

"I'm confused, Bella," he said. "I just can't believe what poor judgment you showed today."

"I don't think it was bad judgment."

"Look at you," he said. "You broke your ankle and almost got attacked by a black bear."

I didn't know what to say to him. What he said was true, but I didn't know why he was being a dick about it.

"It was an accident," I said.

"I've got a bunch of grading to get to so I'm going to head home."

"I was hoping you might stay with me tonight," I said, a little pathetically. I was in a lot of pain and really didn't want to be alone. "You can grade here. I won't bother you."

"Not tonight," he said. "You picked a terrible week to break your ankle."

"Gosh, how inconsiderate of me," I said. "Next time I'll check your schedule before getting injured."

"Good night, Bella," he said, unmoved by my sarcasm. Then he paused and bent down to kiss me quickly on the cheek.

"Night," I said, not looking at him.

As annoyed as I felt, I still cried when I heard the front door slam shut. I knew exactly where this was headed. He was going to break up with me.

Asshole.

#

The woods. The bear. Edward. Derek. The pain. The rejection. The emptiness. It all assaulted me in that awful space created in the wake of Derek's cold exit. I took an extra Percocet and briefly considered washing it down with a beer, but didn't.

I was overloaded with insecurity. Derek wasn't going to marry me, I knew it. My unconscious mind had told me as much in my nightmare at Lake Crescent, but I hadn't believed it. And I wasn't ready to be alone again. I thought about the overwhelming, engulfing loneliness that I'd lived with for five years after Zack died, and I was terrified of its return. But it loomed that night, a dark and destructive force waiting to consume me.

I hated Derek for leaving me, and he hadn't even left yet.

I lay on the couch, first crying, then sobbing. My head filled with mucous and pounded until I thought I would vomit. I sobbed heavily and loudly, alone there in my little house, wishing it would just crumble down on top of me. I felt as though my whole life was just this pathetic, painful mess and I hated myself for being so weak. I gripped the bottle of Percocets in my hand and thought about taking another. I frightened myself with how little I cared right then about anything but finding some relief from my tormented mind.

And then out of nowhere, he appeared.

Edward stood across the room from me. I thought I'd hallucinated him at first. The sight of him made me cry harder.

"What are you doing here? How did you get in?" I asked through my streaming tears.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I was worried about you."

"I'm fine." 

"Bullshit," he said. "You are not fine. What happened?"

"Nothing." I started crying again.

"Please tell me." He crossed the room and stopped a few feet away. He turned his head and took a cigarette out and sniffed it, but he didn't light it.

I gripped the pill bottle tightly in my hand.

"You can't be here," I said.

"I'm not leaving until I'm certain you're okay."

I was immensely grateful for that, but tormented by it. I looked up at him, biting my lip to fight back the tears.

"I'll be okay," I finally said. "I was just having a moment."

"I need to check something," he said, and then he came and knelt by my side. "Don't move."

I didn't move a muscle, I didn't even breathe. He gently brushed my hair away from my face, out of my eyes, and soothed my forehead with his cool fingers. He wiped the tears from my eyes, and then he leaned over me and ran his nose alongside my own and inhaled deeply.

"I'm stronger than I thought," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"Be still," he said, then he placed his hand gently over my heart. I could feel my heartbeat begin to slow a little as I relaxed under his touch. My hand opened and the bottle of Percocets slipped out and rolled onto the floor. He stopped and looked down at it, and then looked back at me. I expected a question or an admonishment or raised eyebrows. But instead he just kissed me very lightly on the lips, a soft breeze from the cool spring night. I inhaled his cold breath deep into my lungs and parted my lips under his, like I might be uttering words in some silent language of the heart.

His kiss obliterated the agony of my grief, destroyed the ache of my isolation. It redeemed me, but it was a twisted, wretched sort of hope that I found there. And the little death I thought I could fake, the one where I thought I could stop myself from loving him? It was a lie. It was the biggest lie in the history of lie telling. It was legendary.

"Edward," I said. "This is all so fucked."

"I know," he said.

"I'm afraid you're manic."

"I'm afraid you're depressed," he said. "What were you doing with those pills?"

"Nothing," I said. "It's just my pain meds. My ankle is broken."

"I know," he said. "How many did you take?"

"Just one," I said. He gave me a skeptical look. "What?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," I said. "Edward, I'm not that far gone. I was just upset."

"I know, but you still haven't told me why."

"Because," I said, but I didn't know what to tell him. Where would I begin? That I was inappropriately in love with him? That I had seen him carry a bear off and thought I might be going crazy? That I thought he was crazy? That Derek was about to dump me? "It was a difficult day."

"I'm sorry," he said. "That's my fault."

"No it isn't," I said. "How much trouble are you in?"

"Don't worry about that. It doesn't matter."

"Did Carlisle take you for an evaluation?"

"Oh, that," he said. "I'm not manic, Bella."

"You've got all the signs."

"Okay, well I can see why you'd think that. Not sleeping. Stealing. It fits. But I don't have pressured speech or racing thoughts and I'm not violent or hyper. I was just having a difficult day."

"You think you can read minds," I said. "That's a delusion."

"I can read minds," he said. "It's not a delusion."

"What am I thinking right now?"

"I can't read your mind."

"I know you can't."

"It's okay if you don't believe me," he said. "I wouldn't either."

I wanted to believe him, though. I wanted to believe he could read minds and that there was some other magic about him that would make sense of the intense comfort he brought me as he held me, protective and unfailingly until that extra Percocet brought me the mercy of sleep.

63 comments:

  1. UGH! The UST is KILLING me!! But I LOVE it! So good.

    Oooo...and EPOV - I'm in!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sooooooo good....I want MORE!!! Is there any way we get a discription of some naked Edward??mmmmm.....In all honesty I <3 <3 this story! I can't wait to see how it all plays out!

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  3. OMG Myg!!! So fucking good, it hurts! I need more. Will you please, oh please, tell us how many chapters there are?!?!

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  4. Can't you take a couple of weeks off work??? I was so psyched to log on tonight and see a new chapter-- I want to devour it all but I kind of don't want it to end, either... SIGH!
    Thanks! Keep up the great work!
    xoxoxo

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  5. So fucking good. My mouth was hanging open through the whole chapter.... and I agree... the UST is going to be responsible for my death.

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  6. oh myggity myg.....so worth the wait! I love it!

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  7. I'm loving this & waiting eagerly for more every Wed & Sat. This is better written than the original...seriously good work. And what is UST? I should probably be able to guess but it's 1am here, so fat chance!

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  8. Newton's going postaaaal!! Awesome!

    I love that the OsBe (srsly can't get myself to type "OB") characters are all so flawed. It makes the story so believable. Derek is a complete prig but he adds so much to the story that I'm glad he's continued to be a part of it.

    The tension you're cultivating here is great. Thanks for not rushing into the bowchickabowbow between Edward and Bella. Slow burn. Nice!

    Thanks, Myg! Awesome as usual!

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  9. Hey ladies! Glad you enjoyed the update.

    UST, I am told is "unresolved sexual tension" and I'm sorry to kill you all with it, it's not my fault Bella is a tight ass. Oh wait, I think it actually is my fault. But the thing is, there's more stress on Bella beyond the the normal "omg, I'm an adult, and this a teenager, albeit a very, very hot teenager who is charming, smart and extremely mature" (of course, we all know he's not 17, but poor Bella doesn't.) Because she's a psychologist, she has taken a professional oath to do no harm to the kids she serves. So there is a whole other layer of agony she's experiencing that has to do with her chosen line of work. I think if she was a seamstress, a lawyer, a shopowner, she might not be able to hold out as much. It's bad enough she's kissed him - omg twice! I think that strain is wearing her out.

    But I get the feeling Edward really knows the kind of pressure she's experiencing and he's worried.

    What do you think?

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  10. Jebus shit, Myg! You crack me up with the apologies. "Sorry I am a little late..." Dude! You spoiled us rotten with three, count 'em, THREE chapters last go 'round, now you're "sorry" you hooked us up with this?! Weirdo. You have awesome twin cuties, a DH, and a big-kid job. I roll my eyes at you in a loving way. :)

    Man....The other bears are attacking humans now? I wish we knew what was going on with that. All this BPOV keeps us in the dark! *Not that I mind, in fact, I love the suspense* And I feel so bad for Edward. He wants to tell Bella so bad...And he does! Repeatedly! But she just.can't.get it! When are we gonna get Mike institutionalized, btw? That kid is so far gone! But hey, another thing we won't know soon. Add it to the list of things that are driving me CRAZY with this fic!

    The scene on the picnic table was exceptional. I love that Edward has to smoke in order to keep his cool around Bella, I'm assuming because of the smell/taste of the smoke in his system. But when she hurt her ankle...I TOTALLY thought he was gonna speed racer it to Carlisle and end up telling her the truth about all of this stuff. Instead, Bella gets a bottle of Percocet, and the hottest breaking and entering ever.

    U.Motherfucking.S.T. is KILLING US!!!

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  11. Myg!!!! I've been checking all day for the next chapter! You have my mind going in a million directions at once, trying to figure out what's going on with Edward. I would LOVE to see something from his point of view.

    Edward is definitely worried about Bella. He can't read her mind but he must know she's in love with him, right?

    I am looking forward to your chapters SO much. You really spoiled us by giving us 3 the other day.

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  12. This is so amazing, but I'm afraid we've been completely spoiled, and this ONE chapter went waaaay too fast. More!

    Cheryl

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  13. Just wow! Yeah, the UST is killing me too, but I love the story so much!! I'm trying to figure out how and when the lights come on for Bella. I don't know if Edward can take much more! Also, somehow Edward is going to turn the tables on Mike. Can't wait!! Please Myg, we need morrre!

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  14. I have been waiting all day for this chapter!!!!

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  15. Fuckawesome as always Myg-sta!

    I loved the smelling of her blood, the "I'm stronger than I thought..."

    ugh, sigh, thud (bluetwat thud!)

    loved as always!

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  16. Highlight of my dad was checking Twitarded and seeing the next chapter (wish it was chapters). Loved it. I was hoping at some point we'd have a glimpse of our "night stalker Edward."

    More please! Perhaps a Nice Thirsty Thursday Surprise? No pressure:-)

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  17. Ok, why was this chapter so FUCKING short???

    Sorry, had to be said. As a licensed counselor myself, I cringe a little at her predicament too, but come ON, I'm picturing The Precious here, so it would SO be worth losing my license over.

    Great UST! This chapter came at a great time. I was just thinking of reading some fic, but couldn't figure out which one was calling my name, then I checked Twitarded & there you were. Thank you.

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  18. Ome, Myg, this is so freaking fantastic. I held my breath the whole chapter and stumbled, Bella-style, when I got too the end much too quickly!!

    GAH the suspense and UST is killllling me!

    Edward is SO worried about Bella! He is going to have to tell / show her the truth soon to save her sanity.

    *hoping for sweet Edward dreams after reading this tonight!*

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  19. Oh Myg you are killing in the best way. Its seems every Wed has me wishing for Sat and every Sat has me wishing for the next Wed.

    I will totally be donating for Edwards POV.

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  20. Such sweet delights are these. So goin to burn Derek in effigy in Forks! Dickhead!
    I can't wait for Saturday and more of this wild ride.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Woohoo I'm finally caught up! Loooooving this fic Myg. You're awesome, even if you are a cockblocking (clitblocking?) ho.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I am a little confused here... How was Edward able to get so close to her at the Reckoner (make out scene), dance with her at prom... but now he can't even sit across from her at a picnic table?

    Sorry if I'm killing it... >.<
    It just seems that he is having A LOT more trouble after the Lake Crescent trip?
    and why was he so mad? Was he trying to be mean so she would get away?
    Dude, I have so many questions... Am I over-analyzing???? Someone let me know what you think pleaseeee lol!

    Anyway, I'm so happy he made an appearance at her house! That was so sweet and great :)
    Thank you for the update... I'm anxiously waiting for Saturday like everyone else.

    Like always, thank you Myg!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh Bella ... don't let Derek break up with you! Break up with him first. He's a loser.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Hi Myg - so much to say! First of all, hi and totally sorry I haven't commented before. I'm on vacation and only getting online intermittently. Second of all, I completely love you, this story and, of course, Mr. Myg. I read your blog a bit too and am very sorry about your step-sister. Really.

    So, I'm hooked on OB now (and thanks about the tampon reference, totally wouldn't have thought that because we used to call my home town OB for O. Beach (code there) and omg, my hometown has the initials of a tampon). I just love it. Yea, so - so much to say, so I'll just dive in, shall I? OK!

    First of all my fave chappie is, of course, Don'ts. Le grand sigh. Oh, Sailward, you have my heart and my hoohaa. Best lines are "Come with me." - so simple and *sigh* of course "Oh, Bella, I'm only so strong." For reals one of the best Edward lines eva.

    Also I love the contrast between the UST between E and B and the lame ust between B and Derek. Oh, another btw, I used to love Mr. Banner - the Twi movie version of him anyway - and now hate him. Of course, your Derek is nothing like the actor Jose Zuniga - so it's ok. I like the contrast because one is a forced kind of an ust and the other is ust due to true restrictions in correct behavior. If any of that makes sense.

    Last bit before I'll stop. I love this Edward and this Bella, although can I vent a bit about her? Is that ok? Cause I'm totally invested in them as real characters now and, well, that's a good thing no matter what, right? When is Bella going to get her head out of her ass? Is that due to her age then? Like things become more concrete over time? Cause for me personally, things have become more grey over time. I know this is a weird part for a fan letter to you, myg, but I feel like you'd be receptive to discussing this.

    If not, don't sweat any of this - I really am loving this story and cannot wait wait wait for the super hot lemon that is bound to be coming our way (yes?). On that note, I think E should totally get to third base with B first to show that he wants to give her pleasure (unlike Mr. Banner - grrr.).

    OK, hopefully not too much weirdness for you. Big fan. Alrighty then. Cannot wait for more chappies. You're my current fave update! Yay! Mwah!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Myg-

    I have been reading OB since the beginning and I'm sorry I haven't commented yet.

    I love your story and get so excited when I see an update here! I think this is a really interesting take on the whole idea of "forbidden love" and I can honestly say that I have no idea what's going to happen; I still can't figure out how the bears figure into the story but I LOVE that about this fic, because I feel like predictability is a chronic problem with fanfic. Can't wait to see what happens, and I promise I will comment more from now on. But just know that your story is LOVED!!!

    Em

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  26. LOVE me your Osa Bella, Myg! And I will head to FF and give the love you deserve there too so Mr. Myg can bask in the stats. I hope this story goes on and on, I love it so much! Your Edward is so complex, so much more mature and balanced and believable than SM's. And I love your Bella, that she's one of us and not a teenager. Except in her heart where we all retain that permanent 12-16 year old that surfaces at those inopportune moments (like when we're clutching the percocet and sobbing away). More OB (and I love that you named it after the tampon!), I'll never get enough! Don't forget, after you get through OB, then you have to move into NM, OB-style....

    I've got babies too (mine are 3 and 7) and I have no idea how you find the time and peace to write. You're my hero!!!!!

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  27. Why do Saturdays and Wednesdays seems so much farther apart these days... especially with only one tiny tiny (albeit exquisite!) little chapter to get me to the next one? You should have seen the smile on my face today when I surfaced from 2 hours of intense work this afternoon and remembered that it's WEDNESDAY!
    I love your E and B... I would love to read an EPOV but have no real idea how all that bidding works... surely it's not THAT complicated! How does the team thing work?

    ReplyDelete
  28. Rock_my_gypsy_soulJune 16, 2010 at 11:05 PM

    Yeah! Wednesday night with a margarita and another chapter of OB. It was a great ending to a cluster-fuck of a work day. thanks.

    Myg, I love your story. And I admire your talent. While I feel so sorry for Bella that she STILL hasn't gotten laid for trying... not by Jake, not by Derek, not by Edward; the UST is just right under the circumstances. ( Bella on the sex-offender list would freak me the fuck out! And poor Charlie would spend endless hours beating himself up wondering where he sent so wrong.)

    I'll leave you with the best compliment I know for Fanfiction- it is like I am reading a published novel.

    ReplyDelete
  29. All I can say is MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE PLEEEEEEEASE!!!


    Lovin' it!!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Oh you guys, I want to answer your questions so fucking bad, but if I do I'm going to give too much away.

    I will say, everything is in this story for a reason. Those reasons will be obvious when they need to be.

    So, Kaily there's a reason poor Edward is having a tough time in this chapter, especially around Bella.

    If anyone else wants to field this, please go ahead. I'd love to hear what you think. No betas allowed!

    And Em, same thing. I know Bella's head is up her ass, but there are reasons for it.

    If anyone else wants to speculate, I'd love to hear what you think.

    It will all get clearer as the story progresses, promise.

    Have I told you I love you enough? Because I totally do. When the whole thing is posted, I will be all too happy to gab and gab and gab and answer any questions you all have.

    ReplyDelete
  31. stilllookingformyvampJune 16, 2010 at 11:13 PM

    Myg,

    You spoiled us with the three chapters - this one wasn't enough!! Can't you ship the hubbs and babies out for a week and soothe our need for MORE MORE MORE??? Or is that asking too much??? ;)

    Lovin' it Myg!!

    ReplyDelete
  32. I L<3VE this story. <3<3<3 LOVE IT.

    Can't wait for them to get everything figured out!!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Thank You for writing - love to see that a chapter is posted (or 3 yay!!) but hate when I get to the end of it.. great mystery, character development, UST - leaves me wanting more, badly! I can't imagine how much effort goes into writing (took me forever to type this comment!) you are great at this - thanks again for the little escape!!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Oops @MyRobbie I meant to address the Bella's head's up her ass comment to you. You're right. Her head is wedged far and firmly in her tush. But there are definite reasons for it. When we get to the end, if it still isn't obvious, well, then I didn't write it right! But I will be happy to explain it all. Probably too happy. Mwah and thanks for caring enough to ask.

    ReplyDelete
  35. For the record, I don't have time. I have NO time. But I do have obsessive love for writing this story. And for all of you. And I guess that's all it takes.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I don't really remember how I ended up on your site, but holy smokes you got me hooked! Somewhere I read that chapter 16 was gonna be out on wednesday. So here I was, checking every friggin half hour... and then finally as it was time for Girlsnite and my Beasties show up, so does chapter 16. What a friggin cockblock! lol. All I had on my mind all night long was Osa Bella. And you did not disappoint! I LOVE YOU! This is out of this world fucking unbelievable! Is all this new developements or did you already publish something? WOW Myg, wow!

    ReplyDelete
  37. C'mon, people. Let's shed a tear for Bella, she is so fu'ed up over the men in her life, living and er, dead. No wonder that she perceives her life heading in the wrong direction.

    Older men and younger women? That's soooo accepted in our culture.

    There is much less acceptance for Bella to be with "younger" Edward, and so much working against her conscience. Her profession (hey, someone in my hometown just got 9 years for sexing with a 16 year old!), her dead husband's memory, Charlie, blah, blah, blah.

    Oops - I have turned this into a deadly dull, waaaay too serious blog. MYG- you are brilliant - loving the whole thing - and I can't wait for the next chapter. BTW, did Carlise give E hell for confessing one of his secrets?

    Confidential to Bella: give the ring back NOW! The fucker could'nt even stay up one night with you - hmmm, just like those apostles at Gethsemane - throw THAT back in the dick-less head's face!

    ReplyDelete
  38. ...and one more thing Myg. If you aren't writing for a living, you are in the wrong profession. If this is where your heart is (and it sure reads like it), then quit your day job.

    Thanks for the PM to my FF comment, btw. Keep writing! You inspire me to pick up my theoretical pen (which would in reality be the keyboard). Haven't put my toe in that water...yet. So far I have too much great shit to read, yours tops my list.

    Laters, Baby. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  39. Oops - forgot to ask, does Mr. MYG want us to post on TWITARDED and FF? I would like to please Mr. MYG (virtually, of course!)

    ReplyDelete
  40. Keep it coming Myg. Clearing my schedule for Saturday... need more OB (I actually kind of like the nickname--makes me snicker everytime I type it).

    Can someone explain the FGB and EPOV to me? I would love an EPOV.

    and I agree with @vermonstermom4edward, quit your day job. I'd buy your books.

    ReplyDelete
  41. "It was the biggest lie in the history of lie tlling. It was legendary."

    I loved that line. This story just keeps getting better and better. Dereks a douche! What a tool. I dont care if your loved one did something stupid, you still stay with them when they need you. Jerk.

    Cant wait for the next chapter. This is turning into my new MotU. LOVE IT!

    ReplyDelete
  42. MYG You're awesome! Sooo loving this. I've read a few standout fan-fics but this tops them all - I love that it ties in so well to the general "gist" of Twilight and the characters. I'm having a somewhat pissy time in RL at the moment - work, dramas with kids, in-laws staying etc. Updates of Osso Bella are my little literary chocolate bars of the week. Yaaaay Osso Bella - keep em coming! Kate, Byron Bay Australia.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Myg, I have to run because I am late for work (because I HAD to read this chapter, I couldn't go a whole day knowing it was there and that I couldn't read it at work) but I didn't realize I was coming up on the end of the chapter and almost cried when I reached the end, I was so disappointed that it ended!

    Again, I have so much to say about this story and some theories to put forth, but no time!

    Unending MWAS to you, Myg!

    ReplyDelete
  44. What? No!! It can't end there! Myg, you are quickly becoming a master of suspense. I feel like the proverbial frog in the pot of water. This story started off so gently, as suspense goes. Chapters would end, and I'd think, "hm...interesting. Wonder what happens next?"

    That was then. Slowly, I've gone from mere curiosity to hissy-fitting and yelling "What the what?! It's OVER??? NOOOO!!!"

    Can't wait til your next post! I'm boiling, here. Or, you know...something that sounds less weird.

    ReplyDelete
  45. LOVE IT! A little SQUEE! always escapes me when I discover you've posted a new chapter(s)... Can't wait for Saturday : )

    ReplyDelete
  46. K, here's the thing: this story totally pwns me. I think about it all the time. Why? I can't figure it out. I'm not sure who draws me in more - B, E, or even Derek and crazy Newton? I do love that although Edward plays the teenage roll at school well (fraternizing with Paige before the prom), he is so mature when he's around Bella, which seems to make her calm, even if she doesn't realize it. Also, I would've totally punched Derek for his douche move last chapter with bringin Jesus to the school retreat. BAD, DEREK! I'm glad Bella gave him the what-for!

    So, I love this fic, love that you update so frequently and give us our bi-weekly hit, and now I'm gonna go post this on FF. :)

    <3 Osa Bella <3

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  47. So, Kaily there's a reason poor Edward is having a tough time in this chapter, especially around Bella.

    If anyone else wants to field this, please go ahead. I'd love to hear what you think. No betas allowed!


    OK! Here's my guess- but this story keeps surprising me, so who knows if I'm near the mark or not!
    Edward had black eyes when he returned to school, indicating to me he hadn't eaten in a while. This makes it much harder for him to be around Bella, especially in enclosed spaces. I think that's why he was so short with her- he was too tightly wound from not eating. And why hasn't he been eating? My guess is that it has something to do with the bears getting aggressive- perhaps the bears are chasing away the prey he would usually eat, and he is reticent to travel too far from Bella in order to find other animals? I think when he went into the woods he ate, hence his eyes going back to amber...and his ability to be around Bella when she was bleeding without attacking her.

    Someone mentioned (but I can't find who- sorry!) what Carlisle's reaction would be to Edward telling Bella he can read minds. Heeheehee! I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that convo, too!

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  48. @spinning head

    We two flies want to know what Calisle said - c'mon MYG!Give it up, girlfriend

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  49. So, Kaily there's a reason poor Edward is having a tough time in this chapter, especially around Bella.

    If anyone else wants to field this, please go ahead. I'd love to hear what you think. No betas allowed!


    I really don't know if I have an explanation that makes sense other than "They're not bears!" or at least the spirit bear wasn't? I have to assume that because Edward wore sunglasses on the way back from the trip he somehow ingested human or near human blood enough to change his eye color. Which made it more difficult to be around her. And the "bear" incident somehow relates to the old man found wandering in La Push speaking an ancient language, I just don't know how, yet. I'm probably way off base, but it's fun to speculate anyway. Bye the way Myg I love how you use cigarettes in this story, as a prop for normalcy and to distract from the scent of her blood, it's very clever.

    ReplyDelete
  50. i have been avoiding OsBe for two reasons: First, i'm not big on bears, and Second, i don't read fanfic (except the short and filthy ones sometimes) because most of them are boring and painfully loaded with spelling and grammar issues and basically sound like a ten year old's half-assed SM impression. No offense to anyone but you know how embarrassingly juvenile some of them are.
    But then i broke down and started reading Osa Bella and it is so deliciously addictive, i caught up to y'all in TWO! Two days. Seriously, it was bad around here, like, "Yes honey, mommy will come figure out what that burning smell is as soon as i finish this chapter!" bad.
    You're an incredible writer and sadder-but-wiser 30-year-old Bella is a way better protagonist than whiny teenage Bella. Edward is luscious and fascinating, without all the "murmuring" and "velvet". Your writing style is juicy and complex without being difficult to follow. And i am hooked. Bad.
    Just FYI, if your UST keeps "inspiring" me to have the naughty time with my husband and he knocks me up again, i am naming the baby Reckoner. Because that song is way beyond words perfect. i have a couple bands i think you might like, if you're looking for more inspiration.

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  51. You people rule. Serieusement: Super cool.

    It's making the Myg household all smiley to see your excited responses to Osa Bella.

    @LovelyBrutal: Please make band recommendations. Music is the other thing I can talk about (besides English) and see? It even got me commenting. Myg and I are always on the lookout for new sounds, so lay it on us. And tell your kids I'm sorry about the burnt snacks and it's okay if they want an extra cookie or some Nerds the next time you're at the store. No Big League Chew though.

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  52. Mr. Myg, you just cemented your status as fuckawesome in my book by saying "Serieusement." Not that you weren't already totally kickass for supporting Myg in writing this incredible story. I am also indebted Myg for introducing me to Family Band - I've been listening to "Fantasty" on repeat since I bought the album!

    And come on, no Big League Chew? Incroyable! That stuff is totally disgusting in the most awesome way possible.

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  53. Doesn't the Big League Chew have the spider eggs? omg.

    Seriously - FooorksPimp - so PSYCHED to meet you in Forks, btw, and also, that song Fantasy is so incredible, and like the theme song for this, right after Reckoner. Okay, so there are a few songs like that but, come on. "Open up your fantasy and ride your darkest fear..." Who can get away with using "fantasy" in a lyric in 2010, and name the song that, and have it not suck? I don't know how they did it, but I am impressed.

    Seriously, if you guys have music for us to listen to, please send recs. I'll put them on the playlist over at the ob blog (osabella.mygdala.com). Also, I write this listening to music so I definitely want to hear your suggestions.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Myg, SO PUMPED to meet you too!!! I'm totally going to squee like a fangirl. :-D God, September can't get here fast enough!

    I also just realized I typo'd "Fantasty" - Freudian slip? It's all that UST! :) Seriously, though, I haven't stopped listening to it, on repeat. The lyrics are just as gorgeous as the music itself.

    Here's a totally shameless music rec: I sang in an a cappella group in college, and it was hands down the best experience of my life. This is the myspace page for the group, Faux Paz: http://www.myspace.com/fauxpaz

    My recommendation is "Sailed On" - one of my close friends sings it on the Faux Paz recording, and I may be TOTALLY biased, but I think it's one of the most beautiful things ever. They don't have the song I sang solo on posted, but maybe I can dig it up for ya - it got onto BOCA 2008! Anyway, the original artist is Landon Pigg, and the song is gorgeous and heartbreaking - I've been thinking about it a lot as I work on my own fic! By all means patronize dear Landon, but if you like the Faux version lemme know and I'll point you in the right direction to buy the album! Hell, they need the cash - to pay back my boyfriend, who did most of the recording!! So really, an investment in the Faux is an investment in my date night :-P

    Another favorite posted on the Myspace is Heaven's a Lie, originally by Lacuna Coil - i fucking puffy heart this arrangement.

    Apologies for the shameless self promotion! I promise I will return to the topic at hand next time. :)

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  55. Myg, this fic rocks my world.

    You have no idea how long it took me to figure out this was vampire Edward! (WAY too many fan fic's going on right now and all of the others are AH OOC) Just cottoned on a few chapters back and now I think i'm gonna have to re-read...

    Anyhoo, keep up the awesome work, we LURVE it and the UST (that's a new one for me, too) is keeping us all hanging on :)

    Please promise me this, though. Give us warning when it's going to come to an end. With only one chapter's warning at the end of MotU I felt a little torn up, I think when OB finally resolves (and I hope it's not for ages, btw) I reckon I'm not the only one who will appreciate a little head's up.

    ReplyDelete
  56. good riddance Derek!
    I was going to throw up in my mouth a little if they ended up actually doing the deed. Edward is amazing in this story - he's even more mysterious, desirable, and a helluva lot more bad-ass than canon-ward. and well, as we all know, Osa Bella Bella is a far superior dame to the original. No longer a cardboard cut-out or tabula rasa, she actually has a fully-formed personality. Love her, love THIS, and love You for writing it (and Mr Myg for supporting you).
    x

    ReplyDelete
  57. OK, i'll rein in my enthusiasm to make you a mix CD or seven, and instead just keep it to two very favorites i think you'd enjoy. The first is David Poe, and he is literally the reason i met, boinked, and married my husband. i mean you can feel him breathing as he sings. i can't explain it, he's just got a very pained, intimate sound that i can't ever get enough of. Try listening to "Moon", "The Apartment" and "Silver Eyelashes" from the self-titled album, and "The Late Song"<---star star star this one is amazing, "Lullabye", "Childbearing", "Echo Box" and "Good Lonely" from The Late Album. There's also this one, i think it's unreleased but fucking amazing. He does a little intro but if you're in a hurry, skip to 0:45. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-W6QwPBdGc
    Second, have you listened to much Decemberists? They are such amazing, textured storytellers. i find myself drawn to them very strongly lately and i think their more brutal stuff might appeal to you. These are a bit dark but awesome: "The Bachelor and the Bride", "Odalisque", "The Mariner's Revenge Song" -- and these are sweeter: "The Engine Driver", "Here i Dreamt i Was an Architect", "Red Right Ankle", "The Crane Wife". i could go on and on about how important some of these songs are to me but i'll try to restrain myself and just say that i hope you like these and would be explosively happy if they featured somehwere in a future chapter (no pressure!)
    p.s. YOUR house is all smiley? My husband is going to get chapter 15 sex this weekend! He should be paying you. Unless i get pregnant again, then i am sending you the bill for baby Reckoner.

    ReplyDelete
  58. "But that argument pulled back the cloak of my optimism and revealed a grittier side to all the compromising I'd been doing in our relationship." Thank goodness

    My heart is pounding as I read about their talk at the picnic table and now she is in the woods. I am actually typing faster than ever to get this out...gotta go back and keep reading...

    "Gosh, how inconsiderate of me," I said. "Next time I'll check your schedule before getting injured." Boys!

    "I inhaled his cold breath deep into my lungs and parted my lips under his, like I might be uttering words in some silent language of the heart." Wow

    "His kiss obliterated the agony of my grief, destroyed the ache of my isolation. It redeemed me, but it was a twisted, wretched sort of hope that I found there. And the little death I thought I could fake, the one where I thought I could stop myself from loving him? It was a lie. It was the biggest lie in the history of lie telling. It was legendary." Gorgeous, I have no other words for this.

    "...that there was some other magic about him that would make sense of the intense comfort he brought me as he held me, protective and unfailingly..." unlike her actual fiancee!

    I love scenarios like this and I love your "meadow" scene. You truly are a gifted writer. I can feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it, and see everything in this story. I love it!

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  59. I think the bears are the wolf pack...and Edward can't be around Bella because the dream was reality...and Edward drank some shifter blood. So close to human he really wants Bella's blood, NOW!! Also explains the sun glasses, missed school and murderous glares.

    Just read this...can't wait to read the next chapter!!

    Thanks!! And I LOVE the band Passion Pit right now.

    ReplyDelete
  60. "But that argument pulled back the cloak of my optimism and revealed a grittier side to all the compromising I'd been doing in our relationship." Thank goodness

    My heart is pounding as I read about their talk at the picnic table and now she is in the woods. I am actually typing faster than ever to get this out...gotta go back and keep reading...

    "Gosh, how inconsiderate of me," I said. "Next time I'll check your schedule before getting injured." Boys!

    "I inhaled his cold breath deep into my lungs and parted my lips under his, like I might be uttering words in some silent language of the heart." Wow

    "His kiss obliterated the agony of my grief, destroyed the ache of my isolation. It redeemed me, but it was a twisted, wretched sort of hope that I found there. And the little death I thought I could fake, the one where I thought I could stop myself from loving him? It was a lie. It was the biggest lie in the history of lie telling. It was legendary." Gorgeous, I have no other words for this.

    "...that there was some other magic about him that would make sense of the intense comfort he brought me as he held me, protective and unfailingly..." unlike her actual fiancee!

    I love scenarios like this and I love your "meadow" scene. You truly are a gifted writer. I can feel it, hear it, smell it, taste it, and see everything in this story. I love it!

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  61. OK, i'll rein in my enthusiasm to make you a mix CD or seven, and instead just keep it to two very favorites i think you'd enjoy. The first is David Poe, and he is literally the reason i met, boinked, and married my husband. i mean you can feel him breathing as he sings. i can't explain it, he's just got a very pained, intimate sound that i can't ever get enough of. Try listening to "Moon", "The Apartment" and "Silver Eyelashes" from the self-titled album, and "The Late Song"<---star star star this one is amazing, "Lullabye", "Childbearing", "Echo Box" and "Good Lonely" from The Late Album. There's also this one, i think it's unreleased but fucking amazing. He does a little intro but if you're in a hurry, skip to 0:45. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-W6QwPBdGc
    Second, have you listened to much Decemberists? They are such amazing, textured storytellers. i find myself drawn to them very strongly lately and i think their more brutal stuff might appeal to you. These are a bit dark but awesome: "The Bachelor and the Bride", "Odalisque", "The Mariner's Revenge Song" -- and these are sweeter: "The Engine Driver", "Here i Dreamt i Was an Architect", "Red Right Ankle", "The Crane Wife". i could go on and on about how important some of these songs are to me but i'll try to restrain myself and just say that i hope you like these and would be explosively happy if they featured somehwere in a future chapter (no pressure!)
    p.s. YOUR house is all smiley? My husband is going to get chapter 15 sex this weekend! He should be paying you. Unless i get pregnant again, then i am sending you the bill for baby Reckoner.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Myg, SO PUMPED to meet you too!!! I'm totally going to squee like a fangirl. :-D God, September can't get here fast enough!

    I also just realized I typo'd "Fantasty" - Freudian slip? It's all that UST! :) Seriously, though, I haven't stopped listening to it, on repeat. The lyrics are just as gorgeous as the music itself.

    Here's a totally shameless music rec: I sang in an a cappella group in college, and it was hands down the best experience of my life. This is the myspace page for the group, Faux Paz: http://www.myspace.com/fauxpaz

    My recommendation is "Sailed On" - one of my close friends sings it on the Faux Paz recording, and I may be TOTALLY biased, but I think it's one of the most beautiful things ever. They don't have the song I sang solo on posted, but maybe I can dig it up for ya - it got onto BOCA 2008! Anyway, the original artist is Landon Pigg, and the song is gorgeous and heartbreaking - I've been thinking about it a lot as I work on my own fic! By all means patronize dear Landon, but if you like the Faux version lemme know and I'll point you in the right direction to buy the album! Hell, they need the cash - to pay back my boyfriend, who did most of the recording!! So really, an investment in the Faux is an investment in my date night :-P

    Another favorite posted on the Myspace is Heaven's a Lie, originally by Lacuna Coil - i fucking puffy heart this arrangement.

    Apologies for the shameless self promotion! I promise I will return to the topic at hand next time. :)

    ReplyDelete
  63. I think the bears are the wolf pack...and Edward can't be around Bella because the dream was reality...and Edward drank some shifter blood. So close to human he really wants Bella's blood, NOW!! Also explains the sun glasses, missed school and murderous glares.

    Just read this...can't wait to read the next chapter!!

    Thanks!! And I LOVE the band Passion Pit right now.

    ReplyDelete

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