So yesterday, I took my bedraggled, beat-down ass over to the grocery store after work. As I heaved my overflowing cart to the check out lanes, I remembered that I needed to get some Halloween candy. We don't get that many trick-or-treaters, mostly because the guy next door puts on REALLY loud and REALLY scary scream-y sounds [it would be a stretch to call it "music"], lights torches, and gets a smoke machine going, so most of the neighborhood kids steer well clear and avoid our house, too.
I hadn't seen any big displays of candy while I was schlepping my cart around the store, but then I remembered that last year, they had put all of their Halloween candy up at the front of the store, in front of the registers. I recalled this specifically because at the time I remember thinking "Well that was a REALLY shitty idea - I'll bet you sell almost NO Halloween candy because everyone is already eyeballing the cash register and making sure the stoned high-school kid isn't triple-charging them for that already ridiculously overpriced brie they got dazzled into buying at the froufrou Princeton grocery store..." So I figured if I parked my cart for a sec and dashed up to the front of the store, I'd find a cornucopia of chocolatey Halloween delights.
Imagine my surprise - nay, horror! - when instead of a Halloween candy and goblins and tombstones scene kinda like THIS:
I found THIS instead -
OK so it wasn't REALLY exactly like this, but for all intents and purposes, they might as well have had Santa and his helpers running around asking who's been naughty and who's been nice. There were Christmas trees (plural), candy canes, inflatable lawn decorations - the works!
Do I sound like I have a problem with this??? Good. Because yeah...I do. I rolled my eyes when I got my first Christmas-themed catalog in the mail over a month ago, and did it again when I noticed Christmas merchandise popping up in the stores not long after...dammit I am NOT ready! I might be dating myself here, but fuck it - I remember the Christmas holiday season didn't start until riiiiiight around Black Friday. These days? You don't even get to let Halloween pass before the Christmas stuff starts taking over. Labor Day passes and BAM! Bring on the wreaths and holly. Thanksgiving? Bah humbug!
Here are a few examples of acceptable Halloween-Christmas crossover moments:
Don't get me wrong - when the season is really upon us, I'll be first in line to get things going! I love celebrating the holiday season with my family and friends - I'm no Scrooge. Plus I've been a veeeery good girl this year, so who know what I will find under the tree on Christmas morning???
Here Is..... Your Morning Wake Up Call With Robert Pattinson
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