Sunday, April 10, 2011

What If Twilight Was A TV Series?

I love television. There--I said it. It's a much easier thing to confess to at my age then say, I love Twilight... even though I'm no longer afraid to admit this fact. When I say I love television, people say "Ooooh, what's your favorite show?" - but when I say I love Twilight, people respond with one of two things - either "Ooooh, I loved that book!" or "What the fuck is Twilight?" And I rarely get someone who actually wants to delve into the series any deeper then the whole Team Edward vs. Team Jacob thing. So (for better or for worse), saying I love television is a little more... socially acceptable.

This may or may not be what I look like each evening.

There have been times when I seriously thought my DVR would explode from all the shows I just had to watch - the recording was never ending. And it's not uncommon to see the DVR bordering on 100% full. Of course, it's not just me doing the recording either. Mr. LKW has his shows, too, and occasionally they overlap with mine. We really need two separate DVRs to survive in my house. If one of his shows doesn't record, and mine does, he automatically blames me for sabotaging the DVR. Okay...so maybe I do, but it's his own fault for being a technotard.

But what if my two loves united? What if Twilight was a fucking television show? I got to thinking about this one morning while I was entrenched in an episode of The Vampire Diaries while huffing and puffing on my ellipti-kill. VD is definitely one of my favorite shows on TV, but mostly because it's really my only option as far as vampirey-type shows go on stations I don't have to pay for. I love True Blood too but I'm always a season behind since I don't have HBO. And seriously, I'll watch just about any show with vampires. It's a sickness.

A girl can dream... right?

When I say "Twilight the TV series," I'm of course imagining it with the cast from the movies. Can you fucking imagine? Robert Pattinson on your big-screen, HD television for approximately 22 weeks out of the year! Each week a new adventure with Edward and Bella. Each episode exploring deeper into the books, all the scenes and dialogue you missed in the movies - THERE! None of this skimming over the content like the movies do. And not to mention the repeats... and then the syndication. Just the thought makes me all twirly inside. My television would probably cower in its corner knowing the dry humping I'd unleash on it on a weekly basis.


Huh, that theme music sounds a bit familiar!

For now... I guess I just have to be satisfied with Damon and Stephan Salvatore and their weekly vampire adventures. And make fun of Stephan's obvious deep desire to BE Edward Cullen. I mean, really? The brooding attitude, the poofy hair, the eyebrows. He even wears a fucking pea coat! Not too mention he survives on the blood of animals... for the most part.

Dude, give it up. Plus... you're a little too tan. Maybe you need to stay out of the sun.

But honestly, I can't help myself. How about you, Twitarded nation? How would you feel if you could watch a brand new Twilight adventure for an hour each week? Would it make you love it more or would you eventually start to hate it in all its tediousness?

PS: If I ever find out Stephenie Meyer turned down a TV deal for the movies, there will be hell to pay. Hell, I tell you!

31 comments:

  1. I barely even watch TV and even I'd watch that!

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  2. evaporationI am Obsessed now...this would beApril 10, 2011 at 8:51 PM

    I'm obsessed with all this sh*T now ,this would only leave Mr.E no choice but to have me commited.0.o He knows all the twilight movies by heart and hates me for it. He has caught me a few times looking at Rob's throbbing member...thanks to The Cold Shower.This would be his limit, on T.V.. Who the f*ck cares..I'm so there.

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  3. That would be a dream come true. A new show each week with Robert Pattinson, Kellan Lutz & Jackson Rathbone!!! Almost too much hotness for one woman to take. Almost.

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  4. What's the biggest size flat screen they make? I might have to redesign the living room to fit one in if that was going to be on every week.

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  5. @kintail--What you said times a thousand.

    This comment is coming from someone who never watches TV. Like ever. I watched that fake trailer & got a little tingly inside. I would watch this show. I would fill up the DVR & never delete the old episodes. Like ever.

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  6. this is a FANTASTIC idea! i too watch VD because I love vampires and cheesy teen dramas *cough* Dawson's Creek rocked *cough* however I would much rather watch a new Twilight episode weekly. I would hope FX would carry it so we might get an occasional peek at Assward. We'd have to deal with the awkward product placements though. Bella: "Wow, you have so much music. What are you listening to?" Edward: "I was listening to Debussy on my iPod touch 4th gen. I need all 32 gigabytes to hold the 109 years of music I've collected."

    BTW still hoping for Twilight:The Musical

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  7. Ooohhhh! Dream come true! Can someone create more adventures for Edward and Bella so there will be more than just 4 seasons??

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  8. I'm getting all "twirly" thinking about it too. Gah! Now that would be something to look forward to every week. It could be a slow burn too...like are Edward and Bella ever gonna get it on? Oh...wait.
    ;)

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  9. 2 things.

    1) IMAX 3D TV Room.

    2) On HBO so I can see some more headboard-holding/thrusting without those pesky sheets in the way. Vampsex. LOTS.OF.VAMPSEX.

    Jesus, the show could just go on forevah. Love that tv credit vid. Love that PFach goofy reel in there. He's so hot.

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  10. I would definitely need a second DVR just for Twilight. It is bad enough with all the Twilight related stuff I do DVR now! Thank goodness for an accepting hubby and DVDs and internet to catch up on shows ;)

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  11. OK, here's why i would vote no. Because the show, like the book, would be aimed at ya/teens, right? So every week they're going to tackle a burning issue of concern to high schoolers. Rosalie has a party while Carlisle & Esme are out of town and someone brings *gasp* beer. Emmett's smoking cigarettes to be popular. Edward's shoplifting to get attention. Bella's secretly a cutter (we saw the tip of the iceberg there at the end of Eclipse, no?). So, thanks but no thanks, Degrassi Vampire High.
    Now if a cable network like HBO bought the rights ... and it aired after 10pm ... sign me up, put the kids to bed, bring me a bottle of tequila and two vibrators.

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  12. Wouldn't it be loverly? Sadly this is exactly why I've given up TV for reading. FanFiction.

    I get a new "episode" every day. And there is sex. Hot steamy sex. There is no eye candy, but I've got enough RobPorn on my smutty hard drive to help my imagination with the visuals.

    And (as Ms Kathy said in her Twigasm interview) FanFiction is like laundry . . . it's never done . . . there will always be more. Helz yeah!

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  13. If I had Bill Gates/Oprah/George Soros-kinda money, I would pay to make this happen. I want to go to there (maybe we could convince Tina Fey to write??? lol...)

    : )

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  14. I would SO watch this, but ONLY with the movie cast. NO CHEAP KNOCK-OFFS! Robward on my TV every week? HELL YES!!

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  15. I'm a serious TV addict and would kill for Twilight the TV series... although I'd have to cut a bitch to wait 10 seasons for some headboard action!!

    Don't laugh... okay maybe you should or otherwise you'd cry at my next statement.. I don't have DVR and literally still record shows I'm going to miss on VHS! There I said it and I feel much better.

    PS: I already have my VCR set up to record a show I'm going to miss while in NYC next weekend lol.

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  16. Twilight the Series sounds great in theory. I had a thought though, say each chapter of each book was an episode? That's a lot of Bella (who I do love but she's not Edward)! Take New Moon,for instance; Edward is in Chapters 1-3, then disappears for Chapters 4-19 (& don't forget "January", "February", "March").

    Follow me here....Twilight has 24 Chapters PLUS an epilogue. One full season would be Twilight (as in Book 1) ending with James almost killing Bella! Great cliffhanger to be sure but MONTHS until we see the final 3 chapters with Edward in the first 3 episodes of Season 2. Then, again due to the number of chapters in New Moon, we'd see three more episodes with Edward, then , no more Edward until the Season 3 opener in Volterra. Hmmmm, while it seems this series really WAS written to be a series, that is alotta Bella.

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  17. What we really need is the rights to MotU being sold to HBO starring none other than Robert Pattinson as 50 Shades? Who's with me on this?

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  18. Rob is great as a movie star, but I love your idea for him better! One night a week to look forward to new Rob on my tv screen without sitting through country music or tween award antics? AND its Twilight? WIN!!!

    Also the thought of lots of great guest stars adds to the twirly! I wouldn't even mind if they did one of those musical episodes.

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  19. I too would watch a Twilight tv series. But MotU with RPatz? HELL YES!!! Just saying..

    @StackedLikeSookie I am TOTALLY with you on this ;)

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  20. @StackedLikeSookie & @Nix - That is EXACTLY what I was thinking while reading this post.

    Since MotU has a gazillion chapters then it would never end aaand that would be amazeballs : ) Someone get a hold of HBO and pitch this to them please!

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  21. WHY doesn't this exist?!?!?! I would watch it! Heck, I would subscribe to the Twilight premium channel if needed in order to watch it (and I don't pay for premium channels ever). Someone make this happen.

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  22. I agree with My After Car - sign me up for that premium channel!

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  23. @My After Car: Ha Ha, EXCELLENT, Twilight Premium Channel! And of course our favorite fanfics would be included on that channel, in between the canon twilighty goodness.

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  24. I agree 100% with all the comments!!!

    Sometimes I feel like I'm cheating on Twilight with VD (the TV series, not the STD), but thank God I have Stefan and Damon to get me through the the Rob droughts. I still can't believe that the VD books came first and they didn't sue SMeyer's ass, although I'm very glad they didn't. And Rob as Fifty...? Holy Hell.

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  25. You should check out the "Smallville" openings for "Twilight". They are sooo good. Here's a link to the first one. There's one for each movie.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yD12wmZRA8&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL
    xLearnToHatex has the best ones. There's a few out there

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  26. Man...that would be heart stopping.. oh wait... they'll get older..Meh.. we could get a few years worth outa them..I'd need a wall size TV for that deal..Move over Fresh Prince...the Cullens are movin in..*I just so dated myself*

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  27. I love how Taylor Lautner was not in the opening credits of Twilight the TV Show.

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  28. You should check out the "Smallville" openings for "Twilight". They are sooo good. Here's a link to the first one. There's one for each movie.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yD12wmZRA8&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL
    xLearnToHatex has the best ones. There's a few out there

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  29. evaporationI am Obsessed now..April 29, 2011 at 10:52 AM

    I'm obsessed with all this sh*T now ,this would only leave Mr.E no choice but to have me commited.0.o He knows all the twilight movies by heart and hates me for it. He has caught me a few times looking at Rob's throbbing member...thanks to The Cold Shower.This would be his limit, on T.V.. Who the f*ck cares..I'm so there.

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  30. I too would watch a Twilight tv series. But MotU with RPatz? HELL YES!!! Just saying..

    @StackedLikeSookie I am TOTALLY with you on this ;)

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  31. Okay. I love Twilight, so this would be amazing, but you insulted Stefan Salvatore, so my opinion of you for saying Twilight should be a TV show has gone down... a lot. And also, The Vampire Diaries was published in the 1990's (I think it was 1991 or 1992), and Twilight was published in 2005. So, more than ten years difference. Just my opinions, though.

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