Monday, June 27, 2011

Newsflash! Men Find Their "Twilight"!!! Twitards, Meet Bronies.

Let me start by saying that I am in no position to point fingers here... As a not-Young Adult-aged chick who has spent a ginormous chunk of the last two and a half years focusing on all things Twilight (books! movies! blogs! Forks! Robward!), I know I don't have a leg to stand on here... But I just can't help myself. Insert your own "pot calling kettle black" joke here--I totally have it coming.

Even if some of the zeal has been knocked out of your Twilight obsession of late, I'm sure you can still recall what it was like to be totally CONSUMED. I'd spend my days lurking around Hot Topic for the latest merch, dizzy with the prospect of scoring a new Mini-Edward or that elusive piece of Cullen-crest-themed jewelry that I could wear on the sly. When Jenny Jerkface got me started reading the saga, I did nothing for days on end but read and reread the books, all the while playing the Twilight soundtrack over and over and over again. Discovering there was a whole online fandom of women my age who were equally obsessed was such a revelation that I am surprised I didn't get fired for my lack of productivity (unless you want to count my prolific blogging and commenting on other blogs). And fanfic?! Sweet baby jeebus, the fanfic!

But what if the focal point of my unwavering devotion wasn't Twilight, and instead I'd developed an obsession with...My Little Pony? And what if I had a penis?

People, allow you to introduce you to the "bronie."

The Bronie Crest. If you really mean it, show me your tattoo...

A bronie is an adult male who is head-ever-heels ga-ga for the television show (you guessed it)"My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic". I can't make this shit up! Bronies, it would seem, are all the rage these days...

 Seth Green, bronie extraordinaire.

They were discussed on my favorite radio show two weeks running, and apparently even former president Bill Clinton is in on it (ok fine he's just a good guesser). There's a bronie-run website that has over 14 million pageviews.

Bronie in the back - why so sad? Did you not want to be Purple Pony?

Let me put that into perspective: the Twilight fandom isn't exactly small, and while we might not be the biggest blog out out there, we hold our own. To date, we've racked up two million pageviews. You can pick up your brain matter off the floor now. There's even fanfic... Plus there are bronie tributes and movie mash-ups on YouTube!

So twisted it WORKS.

These are men. Obsessed with My Little Pony. Can't wrap your head around it? I know, neither can we. And that's saying somethin'.

Some bronie quotes from a recent profile done by -
“First we can’t believe this show is so good, then we can’t believe we’ve become fans for life, then we can’t believe we’re walking down the pink aisle at Toys R Us or asking for the girl’s toy in our Happy Meal,” Allen said in an e-mail to “Then we can’t believe our friends haven’t seen it yet, then we can’t believe they’re becoming bronies too.”

“Honestly, if someone were to have told me I’d be writing a pony blog seven months ago, I would have called them insane.”

“I believe the fan base for this new generation of MLP is one of the most amazing/unexpected things to come out of the internet in a long while.”

Sound familiar??? It sure does to me!

Honestly, I don't know what to make of this... When I first came across bronies, my immediate reaction was clapping my hands with glee and proclaiming to Mr. Snarky "Ah HA! FINALLY!! A group with an inappropriate obsession that makes my Twilight obsession seem normal by comparison!!!" But really? who am I to judge? If it makes you happy and it isn't hurting anyone, I say have at it. Wave that freak flag as high as you are when you watch that show, bronies! And thanks for taking the pressure off of us Twitards. We owe you one, bros.


  1. Bwahahahahahahaha *snorts while wiping tears from face*!!!!!! I'm a total asshole, I know, but at least there's a hot guy and schmexyness in twilight....there isnt anything sexy about pink ponies with purple hair.

  2. Oh that was AWESOME! Thank you Snarky, now I know what I'm getting my best friend for his birthday this year! A SHITTON of my Little Ponies!

    Are girls allowed in this club because I'm laughing my ass off at some of these mash-ups they have going on.

    I have a 4 year old daughter and bought her a My Little Pony DVD, its still in its wrapper. She has zero interest in it, but always wants to watch "Edward and Bella"

  3. Thanks bronies! In the future, when I refer to myself as NORMAL, I think I can forget using all caps!

    I am so gonna turn TheRugbyboy on to this. I bet if I can figure out the right way to sneak it onto his radar, he will eat it up! And payback from his mom is going to be hell! I'll be buying him six foot cardboard ponies for Christmas!

  4. No matter how many times someone explains this to me, I will not get it. This makes no sense to me. I'm giving the bronies the Care Bear Stare.

  5. LOL My friends sister told me about this a couple weeks ago! When she told me they were called bronies I said that is the lamest name for a pedophile. Thanks for taking some of the focus off us guys!

  6. Boys will do ANYTHING to be included in a group no matter how lame.....D&D, Comic books, video games etc.

    Sigh, this is another example of the male sex not wanting to grow up and be men worthy of a woman.

    Im trying to picture the boys with their pony cases getting together to play ponies and brushing the ponies hair while living in their mothers basement. Is there a no girlz allowed sign posted on the door?

  7. Is this shit for real? Talk about not being able to wrap your head around it. Really?!?!

    I get Twilight...even if I didn't get Twilight. There are hot men to look at, a love story, but pony animation?! W.T.F?!

    And yes, I'm off to watch the video and google this whole thing.

    That is all.

    w/v Billyz "Hey! That's Billyz pony!"

    xo J

  8. TK- PSML at the carebear stare! ES & I would get so excited when the carebear movies were on Disney late Saturday mornings. Those were the days.

  9. I've been fluttering around a few general fandom comms on LJ.

    Didja know the bronies have their own terminology for shiz?

    Go forth and google clopfic. I dare you.

  10. What. The. Fuck.?

    Bronies? That's hilarious.

    At first I'm like... has STY been smokin the waccy baccy? Cos SOMEONE has. Or perhaps the 'shrooms.


  11. @elusivetwilight - "clopfic"?! noooooo!!! I don't even read twilight slash fic - lol!

  12. I don't even have words for this. I guess I always knew there were weird things that people liked, but I don't understand the fascination of ponies by grown men. I guess I'm a hypocrite but really, I don't get it. I'm a little scared now thinking about all of the weird things I've never heard of.

    Ok, I just googled clopfic and now I'm really disturbed. I mean, undead vampires is one thing, but cartoon ponies?

  13. @ElusiveTwilight - Clopfic? I know I'm going to regret it but I think I'm going to have to google this.

    Just not at work.

  14. I'm sorry, I'm sorry...but I can't get past the Fanfiction...I can't.

    and DAMN YOU @elusivetwilight


    "Another twitch from her now perpetually tingling horn..."

  15. For the first time in 45 years, I am speechless. MUTE.

    Bronies? PLEASE tell me you're making this shit up.


    Because I may or may not be more frightened of this group of men than I am of a Yemeni terrorist with a pipe bomb in his backpack as he boards my flight.

    Someone please tell me WHY THE FUCK I am going to to Google this now?


  16. Um... I'm a little scared now... Don't think I wll be able to sleap tonight. The nightmares, dear lord the nightMARES!!!! *hee hee*

  17. @Toefunny - I can't believe you brought clopfic that here - lmfao!!! I'm becoming afraid of my own post and comments - lol! scarred, i tell you.

  18. @MC - don't do it!!!

    Oh, what have I dooooone?!

    ; )

  19. BWUAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!!! OMG! I think I am going to pass out from laughing so hard!!

    I myself love "My Little Ponies", I mean I grew up watching it ALL THE TIME. I never knew there were DUDES who like it!? I think these guys are definitley watching it while Hiiiiiigh. Aloha Mr. Hand. WTF??

    Oh yeah! I totally googled CLOPFIC! HILARIOUS!!! HOLY POO!

  20. @Snarky.... You have no one to blame but yourself. And dammit, if I require Eye Bleach, everyone else should too. PMSL!

  21. Thanks Snarky. Though I can barely stand to look at those pics, Ponydom is just another reason to thank God for Twilight and a male role model we can actually look up to in the make-me-feel goood department.

    The Pony stuff sounds like another way for men to stay infantile and useless to women. I will say it again for the millionth time (tho nobody listens, I know, I know) a real man would figure out what makes us like Edward and just reel us in.
    The Pony stuff seems to be for scaredy cats and other weeny slackers. Exhibit No 1: Seth Green. Oy.

  22. OMG! This is hillarious! Did you see the Hitler/Brony videos??? Freak'n brilliant!


    For those of you read clopfic today, I salute you.

    But I won't be looking you in the eye.

  24. WTH? I thought I was twisted ( and generally feel guilty from all the time I waste on internet cyberstalking Rob and reading fanfic) but you got to be fucking kidding me. I checked out clopfic and I just can't wrap my brain on people getting off on that crap. Disturbing.

  25. I laughed my ass off at this post! I don't get it, but hey good for them. Also nice to know we aren't the weirdest fandom out there!

    I had a friend when I was a kid who liked my Ponies so much he asked for one for Christmas. His dad was less than impressed... At least he can be grateful his kid didn't grow up to be a bronie. Probably.

    @elusivetwilight: I hate you.

  26. Ladies... we're saved. We are now cooler and less crazy than SOMEONE. Ha!

  27. this for real? These dudes actually like that? Its not some made up thing for shits and giggles or something.....I have the biggest WTF going on in my head right now LMAO!

  28. I heard about this on my favorite morning show a few weeks ago too so when you posted I had to check it out. WOW. There are no words. Well, there's one. Clopfic. I'm slightly worried these guys are on their way to being child molesters. That shit is just wrong...

  29. Totally going to read some clopfic now.

    AND I LOVE YOUR AVI, TOEY! When worlds collide....

    [edit 10 minutes later]

    ...I just...I...I can't undo what I just did. Oh god...Please don't read this...WHY DO I FIND ALL THE CREEPY LEMONY SHIT?! Serves me right. I googled Twilight Clopfic.

    vw: prest

    You'd be hard prest to find me anywhere NEAR a clopfic forum. ::VOMIT::

  30. OK. I Googled. Then I followed some links and started reading. I have to say . . . it was really kind of hot! I was late for work because of it!

    I won't go back there though. I read so much fan fiction I dream of Robward almost every night. And I'm very happy with that! I sure don't EVER want to dream of brightly colored ponies getting busy! *shudders*

  31. @LindsayRae - I HATE you. I actually saw the first episode (minus the kinky pony...) GAG. There is not enough brain bleach in the world to undo that horror.

  32. I was laughing with my friend about this and she told her 21 year old son about it and he said all of his friends watch it and told us to watch "My Little Pony Physics Presentation" on YouTube. It's funny.

  33. According to wikipedia The main character of this show is a pony named "twilight sparkle"... Coincidence?

  34. Bwahahahahahaha! That is awesome! I kind of want to hang out with these guys and make these videos with them. Just imagine how normal we could all feel again....not that I really want to be normal...just a taste of normal now and again might be nice....on second thought, I'll stay right here in my happy place. xo

  35. I lurk on a FFN forum where I first heard about this bronie phenomenon. I just shake my head...but then, what a total hypocrite I am! Is this some weird message trying to tell me *le gasp* there is something not quite right about my Twi obsession, no scratch that, it is now more fascination. My obsession is much as I can get. I will say it loud and proud...I like the sexy stuff! And ponies ain't gonna do it for me. Must be a boy thing.

  36. I will admit that I'm a bronie myself. Though I am a girl... maybe that makes it different? I just love the show is all... it's very well done. That's about as far as I go though.
    So there are varying degrees. So don't judge all of us for liking a show. Cause that would be very hypocritical. That being said, I also enjoy Twilight... I'm just a bigger fan of the books than I ever will be of the movies. D:
    Believe me, I was there when people asked what Twilight was.

  37. I see there are many ladies on this blog comment section that don't really understand why we like this show.

    For background purposes, I'm a 24 y/o active duty rescue swimmer and helicopter crew chief for the past 5 years, so go ahead and throw out the whole, "men who don't grow up," perception about us. There's even a military brony community that includes people from all services.

    I myself originally was disturbed by the brony phenomenon, and then one day decided that if I was going to make fun of people for watching a show, I should probably check it out first. Well, I checked it out, and liked it.

    Some of the reasons why:
    - Characters are not your typical female cast characters. They all have very strong, very consistent personalities, and the voice acting is superb.
    - Many references to older movies. I already caught ones for The Lion King, 2001 A Space Odyssey, Snow White, Cinderella, Xmen, just to name a few.
    - Classic cartoon gags from older cartoons such as Loony Toons, Benny Hill chase scenes, Pepe Le Pew, and so on.
    - Superb animation. Flash animation usually doesn't work out well, but when it does, it's impressive.
    - No violence, no gore, no crude humor. Let's face it, the people that DO have a problem are people who don't see the value in shows and cartoons without these. Being a man doesn't mean we're off-limits from saying something is cute, light-hearted, and fun.

    So basically you have a bunch of 20-30 y/o men (and women) who found a cartoon that reminds them of movies and cartoons they grew up with, has great animation and voice acting, and doesn't need to rely on crude humor and/or violence.

    About the "clopfic," discussion and other similar topics:

    Every fan base has them, including Twilight. Considering the number of views Equestria Daily has (43 million as of today), there's little to no wonder that a few bad apples hurt the perception of the entire community. I don't read clopfics or view similar material, and the majority of bronies don't either. Don't be critical of our more creepy fans and act like your fandom is perfect. That's just hypocritical.

  38. First I'm a 24 year old Male. 4 years in the Marine Corps Infantry (Yes I got blown up, no I didn't kill anyone.) , 1 year bouncing for a night club to stay busy while attending college, so growing UP?

    I love how enjoying a show and wanting to share it makes it wrong if your a guy watching what is traditionally considered a little girls show, but clearly you have no idea how many girls young and old watch anime and other such cartoons. Many of the girls that I met that enjoy anime are scared to admit it for fear of of this type of sexist judgement, by both males and females.

    How is a girl enjoying playing a "guys" game like Battlefield or Call of Duty any different than a boy watching a "girls" cartoon.

    I've known Twilight obsessed fans, and Bronies that are obsessed, but not everyone who enjoys something losses sight of reality and starts acting weird.

    I would advise anyone who has a problem with Bronies to realize the purpose of this very site. In the top right of this very page it states that this site is for those who want to share their enjoyment of something with others. Well let me say that I love the show, but I'm totally satisfied with my pony free sexy life, and while I imagine there are those writing that type of stuff, not every fan reads it.


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