When we put out the APB on raffle items, we were happily overwhelmed with the response. Even people who weren't planning on making the trek to the Pacific Northwest were willing to donate stuff. Our friend TwiloveSue, who couldn't make the trip (much to our dismay) emailed me saying she had some things to toss into the kitty, where should she send them? I had her send them to my house. When I opened the package, I was greeted by the most wonderful Edward Cullen fleece blankie. Would anyone notice if I just, oooops, forgot to bring it to Forks?
Don't get too attached, STY. That blankie is MINE!!
My conscience got the best of me and in the luggage it went. I figured it would be nice to know I would have extra room in my suitcase on the way home -- you know, for all my purchases. But every time my hand brushed up against that fleecy goodness, I longed to just keep it for myself. I'm sort of a fleece blanket whore. My coffee table if filled with them. I think it's mainly because Mr. Latchkey likes to keep our house at a balmy 65 during the winter and our house was built in 1920 and I'm pretty sure most of the windows are original and old and drafty as all fuck. So every night, I wrap myself in fleece for my television watching.
When it came time to put my raffle tickets in the brown paper bags, I nearly dumped all 15 chances in the fleece blanket bag. But then there were those pillowcases. Those wonderfully hot pillowcases. Focus, LKW, focus! So I dropped a few in each bag and kept my stubby little fingers crossed that I just won something. And wouldn't cha know, when the blanket came up, it was me reading off the winning ticket... and wouldn't cha know, I WON THAT MOTHERFUCKING EDWARD CULLEN FLEECY GOODNESS.
What I did next, I can't be held accountable for. Don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same.
What? And hey! Why does Snarkier Than You look like she might be embarrassed to know me?
Oh. MA. GAH! Edward Cullen's mouth is on my ass! I can die now. Happy.
So a couple weeks have passed and my Edward blankie doesn't spend a lot of time packed away inside the coffee table because I need to feel his softness on me every damn night. The other night, Mr. LKW comes to sit on the couch and tell me he's going to wrap himself in Edward. I was like "hands off, bitch." And then he did it. My husband, who really knows nothing (or wants to know nothing) about Twilight took my coveted Edwardy fleece and wrapped himself in it.
My ninja photography skillz are fucking legendary.
If only he knew... shhhh, don't tell him. I think this might definitely be grounds for divorce. Now if he says he wants to watch Twilight, I'm really going to start to worry!