Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Pondering Breaking Dawn II [Too Soon??? Nah...]

I know it's been a while, but believe it or not, I'm actually going to write a about something Twilight-related tonight. We know that the Twilighty content has been...light lately, but seriously, YOU try writing about Twilight and Twilight-y related stuff only - five days a week - for THREE YEARS and get back to me. Also, today is Twitarded's three year anniversary. Pretend you are drunk and covered in glitter and confetti and let's move on, shall we?

They're coming! (and I sorta wish they were going to look like this...)

I kind of missed the boat on writing much about Breaking Dawn: Before the Spawn (catch me after the dvd comes out), but lately, I will admit that I have been holding back comment on my gnawing fear of Breaking Dawn II: I Don't Have a Clever Name for You. Yes, it made me squeak a little when I read in Entertainment Weekly's "movies coming out in 2012" spread the one sentence devoted to BDII - "The vampire romance concludes." but I am not ready to have that conversation yet. OK, part of me is REALLY ready to have that conversation, but that is for another day.

What I have REALLY been wondering is if Kristen Stewart is going to step up and deliver the goods in BDII. Don't get me wrong; I am not a KStew hater - far from it - and I think she's made a good Bella thus far. Buuuut I think that she has largely played characters that are...kind of like how I envision her to be in real life, minus the profanity. So the way I see it, in BDII, shit's gonna get real. Because instead of playing a somewhat sullen, vaguely clumsy and uncomfortable-in-her-own-skin teenager, she has to make a convincing Vampire Bella. No clumsiness, not awkward in the least, doesn't stammer, twitch, or even blink unless she's putting on an act. In addition to turning on the steam with Edward (without the charming "OMG THIS IS SO UNCOMFORTABLE!!!" vibe she worked so well in BDI), she'll need to be a convincing ferocious vampy momma who would do anything to save her child while coming to terms with the fact that her "eternal happily ever after" has been shortened to...less than a year.

Photoshopped and not vampy, but I think this works.

I'm hoping that when November rolls around (and Summit, you can suck a dirty dick for making us wait an entire year for part two), I'll be pleasantly surprised. So what do you think? Kristen seems to have gotten much more comfortable in her public appearances in the last year - maybe it's a sign of good things to come!

...aaand hopefully we will see very, very little of anything like this. Alice would NEVER allow Renesmee to wear crappy flip-flops!

23 comments:

  1. PRETEND I'm drunk and covered in glitter and confetti? Around here we call that "Wednesday".

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    1. Glitter is too damn hard to clean up and therefore banished from the house, but other than that, I'm with you.

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  2. Thankfully Guri Weinberg said Kristen makes a "bad ass vampire", so I'm excited!

    WV: menoppet - When a muppet goes through menopause

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    1. I can't believe there is some name I don't recognize at this point, so I am just going to assume this is some sort of Summit honcho/dark overlord???

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  3. Names for the last movie *sob*

    BD2: Hello, my name is Chris Hansen...

    That's all I can think of at the moment...

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    1. REALLY trying not to think about the whole imprinting thing in BDII...

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  4. Breaking Dawn 2: Paging SVU. I'd kinda like to watch Stabler (I know he's not in it anymore, humor me) slam Jacob's head into the one-way mirror...

    I'm reeeeally not too hopeful about KStew's performance. I'm not a hater, exactly, but I don't think she's a great Bella. Book Bella might be annoyingly whiny and insecure but there's a sweetness and humor to her that KStew completely fails to capture. The twitching drives me nuts, and I don't think she'll be able to kick it completely. Hey she might prove me wrong, and fair fucks to her if she does. I'm just expecting the worst because I'm kind of a pessimist.

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    1. Honestly, I think that the movies in general lost the bulk of the humor and lightheartedness that was in the books, so...

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    2. REALLY REALLY REALLY tring not to think about it [sticks fingers in ears] LA LA LA LA LA LA LA IT'S NOT WORKING!!!

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  5. I love KStew and I have faith that Vamp Bella will rock the house.

    I still get frustrated thinking about how calm she looked when she was transforming and how they post-production didn't make it as obvious as they should have that she was burning up, but I maintain that wasn't her fault and it'll all be ok.

    Cos let's face it, we're all only sticking around for BD2 for the cottage sex and the arm wrestling, right?

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWITARDED xxxx

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    1. I think the only way they could have made that work is with voice-over, and we all know how that works out at this point, wolfy or no lol...

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  6. Renesmes foots directly over daddy's crotch. Be careful of the precious sparkly peen!

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    1. IKR?! Somehow I don't see a lot of lap-sitting taking place in the actual movie - whew!

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    2. That was the first thing I noticed in that pic!! lmfao!!

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  7. Breaking Dawn: That Spawn Got Brawn!

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  8. Breaking Dawn 2: Revenge of the Spawn
    BD2: Can KStew kick ass?
    BD2: Will they manage to make the lamest anti-climax in the history of fiction into a halfway passable movie?
    BD2: There will be no steamy sex in this movie.
    BD2: The cute kid steals all the scenes.
    BD2: Yea, it will suck but it's the last movie so we will all go see it 5 times anyway.
    BD2: In memory of Rob's hair.

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    1. All of these made me laugh so hard! PURE WIN, KINTAIL!!

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  9. That first photo got me really excited. And then I went pessimistic and thought "they'll never let them look THAT good!" Oh well, its nice to dream. Vampire Diaries tonight! YAY!

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  10. Okay, the comment thing got changed again? I like replies. This could be a huge time-suck.

    I'm effing stoked for BD2: It's-Over-Boo-Hoo. I love KStew and I think she will do a great job. I can't wait to see her play a badass. I agree with you that she's taken roles similar to her personality (and, her wardrobe... Adventureland, anyone?), but I believe that she's totally up to the task. I can't wait!!

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  11. I have no idea what to expect - except that they won't look like the 1st pic. Definitely not. The Boy had dodgy hair throughout BD1 and - given that the 2nd instalment was filmed at the same time - he's gonna have dodgy hair in BD2 :-( Boo for that. The bouffant is history, ladies. We need to move on...
    As for KStew - well I really, really hope she steps up her game and embodies the Bella we know from the books. No more twitchiness, no more stammering. Just get to it, gurl! You've a badass role to fulfil!
    That said, I don't want this rollercoaster ride to ever end :-( What are we all going to be doing this time next year???

    CC x

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  12. Happy belated Anniversary Twitarded!

    I'm going out on a limb and say that I think KStew will give a good performance as VampBella. I think she'll be kicking ass. Plus, she'll be throwing Edward around their cottage during vampsex causing their little love shack to crumble..... I hope!

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  13. "Scummit can suck a dirty dick for making us wait a year" (1) I am reminded of why I love Twitarded so much, and (2) I agree completely with the sentiment! Even Harry Potter's part 2 was released 6 months after part 1. At this rate, I'll be in an old folks home when this shit wraps up.

    Happy Anniversary!

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  14. Happy 3rd Anniversary Twitarded!

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