Monday, February 27, 2012

PSA: When Vodka and Ice Don't Mix!

It's true. As much as we love our vodka and whatever in a tall glass of ice, there are times when the two just don't mix. I found it hard to believe myself. I gasped, actually. If vodka and ice are a dangerous combination, how does that bode for the future of our cocktails? I'm distressed at the thought.


A match made in heaven... It started with a video I recently found on the Huffington Post twitter account. The absurdness of the some of the stories on this website... it's nearly unbelievable. So if I never saw the video proof to back this story, I would never have believed it.

A feller from Norway recently documented the effects of drinking vodka and ice skating. Now I love ice skating and I like to think I'm actually pretty good at it. But the thought of trying to balance myself on two slivers of steel while guzzling the goofy juice is a feat that would most surely end with a serious injury. I know walking is a chore for me when intoxicated.

Take a looksy and see what I mean... although I will warn you, there are some pretty cringe-worthy parts to this vid. This guy is pure nucking futs!

   

Now let's review. I have a few fears that revolve around thin ice. One - falling through (me and water aren't that close) and two - falling through and getting swept under the ice away from the hole. That's the shit my nightmares are made of. I get seriously claustrophobic just imagining it.

Also, you know when you stick your tongue on a metal pole and it sticks (think the kid in A Christmas Story)? How the hell does this guy slide nekkid on the ice without it ripping a layer of skin off his body? Maybe the vodka has lubed him up enough?

Let's discuss the sheer ridiculousness of this guy in the comments. Seriously? Is there anything in this video you see yourself doing? Come on... I triple dog dare you.

18 comments:

  1. That is one crazy motherfucker. I sorta have a crush on him.

    ReplyDelete
  2. FANFICZOMBIE SAYS:

    Omfg!! Either he is crazy or I was doing ALL the wrong fucking drugs 20 years ago....

    No.... he is crazy....

    ReplyDelete
  3. That's one crazy Norwegian with or with out the Vodka...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm going to keep my feet on solid ground and my ice in my vodka. Why mess with perfection???

    ReplyDelete
  5. ok, so falling on the ice? Check.(accidents happen, right?) Making goofy faces and rude noises? Been there. Doing it on purpose? Nope, not me! If there's ice, goofiness or rude noises, it's because I'm sitting by the fire, sipping my iced yummies, warm & dry...and maybe a bit tipsy? Or a lot tipsy?

    Did you see his furry bloody legs??? Ewww!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He really took a beating on the ice! All in the name of YouTube!

      Delete
  6. I love Stoli or Svedka ice cold, but I don't want ice in my vodka. I think it ruins the taste as soon as it starts to melt.

    That dude is just bat-shit crazy! Maybe he's the Norwegian Johnny Knoxville!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'd do all of it. Hell, I'll do it completely naked and drink waaaay more than that guy. This game is for the WII balance board, right?

    ReplyDelete
  8. That looks totally freaking miserable. I hate the cold. I grew up in Florida and it took me years to adjust to the frozen tundra in winter when I moved north to... Georgia.

    I kinda wonder if maybe he doesn't have anything better to do. His town looks even less populated than Forks. Hey ice dude, might I suggest a Snuggie and Second Life?

    ReplyDelete
  9. As much ice as I've skated...this is the best ice action I have ever seen..and I've seen plenty. This guy is fantastic... Loved it...pmsl. Great post.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ummmm......AWESOME! And totally cringe-worthy. I am not about to do any of it, but hey, I live to laugh at other peoples' stupidity!



    And you know...Brr. Mother fucking BRR.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You can't get me in ice skates in a nice and relatively warm, compared to the outdoors in winter, ice rink. That dude is crazy! With that being said, I laughed so hard when he fell in the water. Obvs he knew what he was doing by having those ice picks or whatever they were to help him out of the water soooo at least he didn't die??? This time 0.o

    ReplyDelete
  12. The only thing I would do from the video would be to go to Norway.

    I actually didn't even watch the video LOL I know it isn't for me.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hey, guys! GUISE!! I have the best idea EVER. Next year, instead of going to Forks, we're all going to go ice skating. Naked. With Vodka.

    Actually, fuck that. Just give me all of you and the vodka and I'm all good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Twitards in Nooooooorway 2012 ????

      Delete
    2. Im down with the 2nd part. There is not enuf vodka in the world to get me to ice skate naked or clothed! I have this fear that Im gonna fall & some one will run over my fingers, leaving me fingerless, sitting on my bruised, cold ass in a growing pool of my own blood looking like the biggest loser winter has ever known with no way of getting off the ice because I couldnt ice skate to begin with & sure as shit wouldnt be able to while trying to carry my own severed fingers.

      Delete
  14. I love ice skating... and I would love to find a big frozen pond with no snow on it and silky smooth ice so I can skate for miles! Although this I would do withOUT vodka. That shit's just total danger mouse.

    ReplyDelete

Comments are our life now. Leave one!