So it's been months since I FINALLY succeeded in converting my sister into a Twitard and I am pleased to report that her obsession is currently on a level that I would say is on par with mine, minus the blogging. Yay! And sooner or later she will realize that her life won't be complete until she starts to at least leave comments on the blog or maybe even writes something officially for us, but in the meantime I will just continue to post her emails in what I am sure is some violation of sisterly trust (in my defense, anyone who knows me and knows about the blog should be aware that anything and everything is fair game and might very well end up here). I will, however, apologize for posting this on the heels of the vampsicle peen, as I am sure this is going to leave her a bit miffed (and she's already ticked because she won't be joining us for the Twilight screening in Central Park tonight - if you're going, we'll be the two redheads who may or may not be waving a "Team Twitarded" sign. We will not be sober--at all--so approach us at your own risk).
After our Robstengate post, I receive this from Sister Snarky:
I am just a a little bit mortified about how much thought I have put into the whole Rob/Kristen situation but I have been a bit obsessed as well and here is my complete uni-twilight way-over-thought manifesto on the whole situation:I believe RPattz has totally had it for KStew since they started filming (perhaps even before, because the girl had hand in the fact that he was a fan of her work before he even met her). She totally played the "I am so not interested in you" game so freaking well I thought they should perhaps name a new Oscar category for it. If I had written a book called "The Rules (For Sluts and Bitches)" - which I should come to think of it.... but I digress - there would be a chapter called "How To Get A Really Hot Guy To Totally Want You For Reasons Even He Can't Understand". KStew might have already written this herself as she is a master at it. Here are the basic principles:
- Act totally unimpressed by guys complete hotness, even if it includes unbelievably gorgeous face, adorably floppy hair and outrageously charming accent - you must have borderline superpowers to be able to do this, but it is key.
- Don't dress or make yourself up in any way that appears like you are trying to be appealing to him (wear flannel shirts, rocker tees, Converse hi-tops, etc., be cool but not sexy - you don't need any man).
- Have a smart but nerdish (in a cute way) boyfriend that will make other guy crazy with wonder at how you could want that guy when you could have him.
- Be successful with your career or other aspirations but be very humble about it and still exude some cute and charming "quirks" like being shy or clumsy (guys think this is adorable, I don't get if for the life of me).I am sure there are more I am forgetting, but I can't sit here all day so I am going to wrap this up... KStew played the sluts and bitches rules perfectly but then she started slipping... and this is where we get to my theory - wait for it...... OK here goes:- KStew knew she had RPatz wrapped around her little finger and was loving it. But then the boyfriend started getting a bit sick of it and she lost that oh-so-important game piece. Next, she made some not so smart comments in various interviews, tarnishing her goofy but quietly intelligent armor. Then came the last straw: the Joan Jett haircut. That's right, we all know what I am talking about - that ugly Billy Ray Cyrus black mullet that someone butchered her with. Suddenly she finds it hard to smirk at her "RPatz wants me" image in the mirror. She starts to doubt herself. Perhaps she is not pretty enough for that demigod anymore... Suddenly things turn and she finds herself breaking all the important s and b rules. She flirts with RPatz, she must have him, she must know that he is still attracted to her... And now - in my opinion it's ruined. They definitely hooked up and all that good sexual tension is gone and I will bet my dog-eared copy of the book that you will sense this missing tension in Eclipse. She should have sat back, waited for the hair to grow back, received all the acclaim she will hopefully get for the Joan Jett movie and then, after filming "Breaking Dawn" where you know they are going to totally trick her out gorgeous for the "changed" Bella - when RPatz is completely salivating with want and you can't ruin any chemistry for your beloved fans - you take him, again and again and again.There - that's it... in all it's frighteningly detailed glory. Just thought you might want to know...Love you,Sister Snarky
Hmmmm... Sister Snarky is a smart cookie and I think she might be on to something...
What do YOU think???
Oh and because some of you asked earlier this week, you can find some great shots of Robsten over at Robsten Lovers (and pretty much anywhere else you look!)!
A taste -
*Props to the original queens of breakin' it down, those Twi-crazy chicks UC & Moon over at Letters To Twilight!