Friday, February 25, 2011

Live Love Laugh

For the sake of full disclosure and to give fair warning, this post might make you cry a little. But hopefully, it will make you smile in some places, too.

Earlier this month, Dangrdafne and My After Car Is An XKR put together an amazing tribute to my mom: TwiHearted - a fund-raiser for the American Heart Association. The set a goal of $2000, figuring that if all the blog followers chipped in as little as $1, we could raise that amount for the AHA and hopefully raise awareness of heart disease along the way. I was equal parts floored, humbled, and awed when we reached our goal earlier this week! I can't thank them - and all of you! - enough for doing something so completely selfless and inspiring. I have said it before and I imagine I will say it again: the Fandom and the Twidom and the fans & supporters of THIS blog are the BEST, most amazing, and big-hearted group out there in the blogosphere - or anywhere! - bar none. I am ridiculously proud and honored to call you all my friends.

It's not too late...
Click the heart to connect to the tribute page - even if you don't donate...

Myg has also graciously offered to write an Osa Bella outtake just for the people who donate. You just need to sigh the guest book at the AHA page and email her your name - you can get additional details HERE. Thanks, Myg!

This event has come at a rather auspicious, but bittersweet, time. This weekend, my parents would have been celebrating their 46th wedding anniversary. I don't even know what to say to my dad... He is almost 800 miles away and I wish I could hold his hand and tell him everything is OK, even though it's not, really... He probably wouldn't like the hand-holding bit because he is not as much of a mushy, emotional, sentimental git as I am, but it would make me feel better. I might not be able to say anything to my father that will exactly make this weekend easy, but I DO get to tell him - just like I did after we got back from Forks - about this wonderful group of crazy ladies [*cough*] who I love and could not live without at this point. And I can regale him with stories about how how this group - who some might consider strangers - came together into such a tight circle when I needed them most, providing heart-felt condolences, moral support, shoulders to cry on, and even recipes for him when he needed a crash course in cooking (he's still working on that one, for the record - but your recipes are inspiring!). I have not told my dad about the AHA fundraiser yet, but I hope that when we talk tomorrow, it will provide him with some much-needed comfort on what is sure to be a particularly difficult day for him.

You've all been remarkably indulgent the past months, and I'm all about pushing my luck, so I hope you'll join me for a little pictorial history of Mom & Dad Snarky...

Forty six years ago, two crazy kids - kids! 19 and 22! - ran off to Niagara Falls and got married - they eloped!

It wasn't always smooth sailing for them in the early years - my dad was admittedly still sowing his oats when then met -

Hef? Is that you???

In fact, my parents separated briefly after my older sister was born, and for a short time, their future was looking pretty grim. I almost didn't exist - gah! Needless to say, I am glad that things worked out the way they did...

Whew! That was a close one...

My dad might scoff a bit at the notion of being a romantic, but on their 25th wedding anniversary, he recreated their first date - he even rented the exact car he owned at the time! Sister Snarky and I dropped our completely baffled mom off on the street corner near Rutgers University where they first met, and a moment later my dad came around the corner in a '57 Chevy...

Seems like just yesterday all over again...

We played mini-golf on the same course where they has their first date (I think the same woman was behind the counter - no joke). Then we were off to the site where he proposed...

Passion Puddle on the Cook Campus of Rutgers - beautiful! There wasn't a fountain there at the time, but I don't think there was any lack of scenery... On their 25th anniversary, my dad gave my mom a diamond ring to mark the occasion. There was crying all around.

He might seem like a bit of a gruff guy...

OK, truthfully? We staged this photo - he was really just shooting a bunch of balloons that had gotten stuck in one of our trees...

But underneath it all, he's a big softie with a weakness for animals...

Being the Alpha with our Doberman...

Bottle-feeding orphaned baby squirrels...

...and feeding other creatures.

He loved my mom with all his heart and soul.

You could see it in the way he looked at her...

Maybe he was influenced by his parents...?

love lasts...

They shared countless good times over the years...

Miss this...

I'm not sure about the appropriateness of this segue, but this has been on my mind and weighing heavily on my soul these last few days: I'd need to take a moment here to mark the passing of one of our own - a Twitarded friend whose time came way too soon. Many of you may have know Uber Vamp from her comments here, or her Twitter feed, or her chock-full-o-Rob-porn Tumblr... In a devastating turn of events, Uber Vamp - who was only 23 - passed away earlier this week after being injured in an accident. There's nothing I can say to truly express such a tragic, sudden, and random loss. I hope that her friends and family and loved ones can take some consolation in the fact that she brought happiness and joy to so many people...

You will be missed, Uber Vamp.

I hope you will all take a moment to tell all of the people in your life that you love them... Life is short and wonderful and precious and fleeting. Embrace it - enjoy it - live it to the fullest!


  1. Oh STY.... you make me cry! I love you so much and you have the cutest parents in the world... Mama Snarky is greatly missed. <3 <3 <3

  2. Yup, that got the tears flowing, as I already knew it would.

    I loved seeing all of your parents old pictures...especially the ones of your Dad with animals. Any man that's a softy for animals has a heart of gold. And your Mom, she was beautiful. I can definitely see where you got your looks. Wow.

    This is a reminder to all of us, as you said, to love, laugh & live. Life is so precious, so WORTH living.

    Thank you for sharing a part of your life with us.

    Love you.


  3. thanks babies! love you guys - just wanted you to know (((sniffle))).

    lkw, go to bed! i am worried about you up this late - lol! then again, life is too short to go to bed early...


    didn't intend to spend my friday night in front of the computer writing, crying, and scanning pics, but i would happily do it all over again... (for better or for worse... you all are stuck with me!)


  4. We must be of the same era...your pics are eerily similar to many that I have from my youth, and invoke many emotions and memories of my parental units, who are both gone now, (my mom to a sudden heart attack as well). I feel your pain and celebrate the circumstances that brought you about. You are a good lady. You are loved. Soak that up. And thank you for sharing.

  5. Oh sister STY.. your love shines brightly...and your tribute to mama STY. Is a treasure .. we love you,and wish you all the best in life.... mwah

  6. @smartEpantz - yup kinda dating myself with the pics but i yam what i yam - lol... oh wait, that dates me , too...

    : )

    @double...dippin - thanks so much, bb! also, heard you were a saucy girl tonight - can't wait to hear all he sordid details! ; )

  7. Damn. Tears and smiles and tears and smiles. My love and thoughts go to you and your family this weekend. I'm sure it won't be the easiest day, but just know that there is so much positivity flowing around you.

  8. Thanks for sharing the story about your made me tear up thinking about my own parents who are getting on in their years. What a beautiful tribute to your parents.

  9. Wow Sty, Mama Snarky in that first photograph looks just like you! I'm going to keep your family in my prayers.
    I never got to say this, but rest in peace Uber Vamp. If there is one lesson to be learned from your passing, it's this: Stairs are fucking evil. Seriously. You aren't here anymore. And I have four stitches in my knee because I feel on a set of concrete steps yesterday.

  10. I am crying with you for the second time today...well I guess the first time was now yesterday. You know what I mean.

    Beautiful post my friend. Just beautiful. I think there are a few people I need to connect with tomorrow to remind them that I love them.

    Love you bb.

    PS- Lovely tribute to Uber_Vamp. So sad. I am hoping she is now in a place with VIP 24 hr. access to all things Rob all the time. Sweet Rob dreams UV. Xoxoxo

  11. What a lovely post.

    This resonates with me, especially this week. As you may be aware a large earthquake devastated Christchurch, NZ's second largest city, 5 days ago.

    As of today, 145 people are confirmed to have died and over 200 are missing. Those people went to school/work on Tuesday, like every other day, and nothing will ever be the same.

    Tell your loved ones you love them. Hug, kiss, talk to each other. You never know what life will throw at you.

    Oh, and to help Christchurch, please go to

    RIP UberVamp. You will be missed. Kia Kaha - Stand Strong.

  12. It's in times like this that give you reason to pause and be grateful for the people that bring something to your life and to be amazed that a fandom where we all are scattered over the globe are there for each other in times of need.

    Beautiful post STY - the love you have for your mother shines thru and the fact that she knows you are there for your father must make her happy where she is, to know he's not going thru this alone.

  13. *sniffle* Beautifully written post. Will be thinking of Papa Snarky, you, and your family this weekend. xoxo

  14. Wow, your Dad seems like quite a guy! Recreating their date had the tears incredibly thoughtful and sweet! I hope you find some measure of comfort in the good wishes and thoughts being sent your way this weekend. Take care.

  15. STY ~ my heart goes out to you and your family.
    What a beautiful tribute to your Mom and to the love your parents shared.
    I wasn't expecting to be in tears this morning... but they are not all sad ~ there is something beautiful and hopeful about their love that you conveyed so well. I just want to hug your Dad ~ though some crazy stranger squeezing him may freek him out a bit. I think it may be a generational thing... he sounds so much like my own father.
    I will send huggs to you ~ pass them out as you wish.
    As for UberVamp ~ it's a tragedy that I can hardly express. Thank you for reminding us how important each chance to tell those we love just how precious they are to us.

    To everyone here and on twitter ~ I adore you!
    RL has not been at all warm and fuzzy here and while most days I simply lurk ~ you all keep me going. I thank you and love you!

  16. Such great photos. Thanks for sharing.

  17. I fluffy heart you STY. That is all.

  18. Such an amazing sweet post. *squish*

  19. I went back to read this again today & started crying all over again. Damn you, STY!

    I am so, so sad about UberVamp. I didn't know her well beyond Twitter & blog comments, but I still miss her.

    I love all of you h00rs. Even you, LKW.

  20. Lovely post, STY - I <3 Twitards!

  21. What a beautiful post, STY. xoxoxo Suzie

  22. Thank you, STY. This was beautiful. For your mom, dad, uber vamp and everyone in the Twitarded community.

    I have to admit something. I'm a little embarrassed. I always give at least a little something when we do these things, but to be honest. I've been a self-centered twat waffle the last few weeks and forgot to donate. Actually, my problem is the online donating only takes CC's and I can't use mine right now. However, I can paypal someone the money if someone can do it for me :/ I'm feeling like a real douchecanoe right now!

  23. Hey Cat, if you want to make a donation via paypal, you can send to Twitarded and we will add it your name over at the AHA site (but please don't feel obligated!). Thanks!! : ) for paypal...

  24. So much beauty in this post. Thank you for sharing it with us. Love you bunches STY!!

  25. STY I hope you know how much we all heart you and wish u strengh during this time in your life..

    I admit I don't comment here as much as I should, but I'm always here, all the way from Brazil, reading everything u guys write (always making my days better)

    I'm truly sorry for your lost.
    And please, know we're always here!
    A twitarded family!

  26. STY- what a wonderful glimpse into a wonderful family. They raised an awesome daughter.

    And holy hell - that first picture of your mom could have fooled me - you are clearly her daughter! (Esp.the smile)

  27. What a beautiful post, STY. Thank you for sharing more memories with us. *sniffs*

    This family I have luckily found myself a part of continues to amaze me too. When one of us stumbles, there are so many hands held out to catch us before we fall.

    I am so proud that we all came together to support you, the memory of your mom, and AHA. I hope it brings your dad joy to know that his baby girl is so well loved and that through you, so is he.

    Thank you also for paying tribute to Aini. She was such a sweetie and so many of us are missing her. But once again, I saw a fandom pull together and support each other.

    Love ya!


  28. Beautiful post. Love the photos of your parents STY. Thank you for sharing their/your story with us.

  29. Such a beautiful post. *sniffs*

    Thanks for sharing the story of your parents with us. What a beautiful story. The 25th anniversary, one of the cutest things I'v ever heard!

    So sad to hear about UV.

  30. A lovely post STY. Thx for sharing your family photos.

    And RIP Uber Vamp xx

  31. thanks, Snarky -- we, of all people, adore a good love story, and your parents' is a great one


  32. Oh STY, you are just amazing. And your family is amazing as well. What a wonderful tribute to both them and Uber Vamp.

  33. I love you, STY, I really do. This post is a wonderful tribute to your Mom, who obviously did a whole lot of things right (including choosing your Dad, cause he sounds pretty great too). I'm floored by how much that first picture of her looks like you :) You're both beautiful, inside and out. XOXO

  34. "The soul takes flight to a world that is invisible, and there arriving she is sure of bliss and forever dwells in paradise.” - Plato

    Whether you believe 'paradise' to be full of angels, family members of the past or sexy vegetarian vampires, this quote by Plato always convinced me that though we may be mourning our loss, our loved one is in a great place, whatever that place may be.

  35. I know I'm sooooo L2P on this one - and I blame my workplace for not allowing me to view blogs any more (police state!) - but I can't read this post without posting a comment...

    @STY you have obviously been blessed with fantastic parents and I am so happy for you. My parents weren't so happy, but I hope that one day my sons will be in a position to post such lovely pics of me and my hubs.

    I was never touched by Uber_Vamp, but was very much touched by the outpouring of love for her online...

    Rest assured that you are loved and nurtured in this fandom - and I can't wait to give you a rib-breaking hug in Forks (assuming I can break the news to my hubs...) ;-)

    CC x

  36. Dear STY, thank for sharing your lovely memories with us. Just made my (small) donation. I'm always glad when I can contribute something to you lovely ladies at Twitarded. You get me giggling even when it seems there's really not much to laugh at any more.

    Myg's Osa Bella outtake is just the icing on the cake.

    Everything of the best for your family.


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