Okay, so I'm packing my bags, getting a pedi (hopefully), an eyebrow thread, shaving my legs and lady bits (fancy shmancy!) in preparation for my trip to Austin, Texas for the fuckawesome South by Southwest Festival, better known as SXSW, where I will enjoy four days of back-to-back music, loads of [free?] beer and possibly a pick-pocketing or two.
I love doing stuff like this because it's only during times like this its completely socially acceptable to begin drinking beer before noon - oh, who am I kidding? Socially acceptable, shmoshially acceptable. Fuck it and pass me a Red Stripe beer, please. And it's always noon somewhere, right?
Of course, the only downside is that Snarkier Than You will most likely remind me in that subtle way she does best what a total douchebag I am for ditching her in dirty Jersey while I jet-set off to Texas. Even under normal circumstances I would probably agree with her, but since I'm bailing at the critical moment of the New Moon DVD release (kinda like I did for Twilight last year), I'll even beat her to the tit-punch and say I'm extra douchey.
Not like that's going to stop me. I like to do things 100% - especially when it comes to assholery. It's my specialty. Pssst, STY - don't forget to rub Gizmo's ears before you put him in his cage. He likes that.
(Opens salt and prepares to rub in STY's wound) There is another really fucking amazing... shitshow I'm looking forward to this week as well. A bunch of Texan Twitards and I are going to get together, get drunk and possibly even get arrested. It'll be SO much fun.
Okay, okay, that won't happen. Well, the arrested part, anyway. I hope. Instead, we'll toss back a few rounds, mush over RPattz hotness, and maybe catch a Bobby Long or 100 Monkeys show. Regardless, keep an eye on Twitter because I'm sure we're going to be trying to spread the love that way by leaving philosophical gems such as "gjlre;andi" and "uh oh, Texas Katherine just ate a Tootsie Roll. It wasn't a Tootsie Roll."
If you are interested in meeting up with us, email me or Texas Katherine (firstname.lastname@example.org), who is the instigator of what is sure to be a really diabolical time. We'll even take pictures
While I do plan on blogging from the road, it might be difficult if I'm passed out in a gutter or something so I wanted to leave y'all (that's how they say it in Texas! I'm assimilatin'!) with a little chuckle. One of our lovely readers sent this via Facebook a little while ago and I nearly peed myself.
Be nice to Snarkier Than You while I'm gone and be sure to regale her with poop jokes in my absence. She loves those. Promise.