This is like the mirrors I have at home... but the exact opposite. I look great when I leave in the morning and a fucking freakshow by the time I look at my outfit when I get to work. I hate them. And yes, I really DO think that song is about me.
And I squealed. I fucking gave a total fan-girl squeak standing in the middle of the bathroom. At work. Alone.
All the anger I felt toward my sack-of-shit-lying mirrors vanished in a poof! of excitement. No longer did I care that my skirt totally wasn't hiding my beer gut or the fact that my sweater has a hole in it. I just stood there, blissfully un-vain for once in my life, with a big ass goofy grin on my face because oh-mah-gahd, we are now in the same MONTH as the PREMIERE OF NEW MOON!!!!!
I am SO Twitarded.
Alucard used to be my favorite vampire. Needless to say, he's been replaced.
That's how I feel right now. I would sparkle if I could but my skin tends to be more dry and flaky rather than sparkly. Although I DID make myself sparkle on Halloween and I still have the glitter all over my bathroom to prove it! Why can't glitter be cleaned??? I've tried and it still looks like a stripper exploded in there...
Anyway. I feel like it's going to be awhile before New Moon gets here but I can't, can't, can't wait. And then it's going to come and I'm going to turn into Jenny Shitshow-Jerkface because I'm going to be SO excited and probably alcohol will be involved and if anyone, ANY.ONE. says one damn thing about those fucking panties on that day I will whip them out proudly and put them on my head. Because New Moon is going to be THAT kind of party.
I know, I know, I'm obsessing. Well, duh. First of all, I'm trying to avoid all the spoilers so there isn't enough websurfing to satisfy my ADD these days. Not only that but, despite my best efforts, I was still totally blindsided by my new favorite addiction, the Twigasm podcast, this weekend. I was sitting there, listening and snorting and guffawing and then they started talking about the kissing scene and I knew they were going to play the audio and they did. But because I'm a total fucking spaz and can't behave like a normal human being, instead of muting it for a few seconds or skipping over it, I stuck my fingers in my ears and shrieked, "NOOOOOO!!! I DON'T WANNA HEAR EDWARD MOANING!!! GAHH!!!!" and ML walked by and gave me the crazy stare and kept on walking. He loves me.
Oh, and the whole sticking-fingers-in-ears-and-yelling-like-a-crazy-person worked. I didn't hear it. Just in case you were curious.
Sixteen days, Twitards. Sixteen days.
Now, where the hell did ML hide the rest of that Halloween candy?! I need more sugar...