You, dear readers, clearly know this about us and have been sending us quite a few links to the news stories about the Fifty Shades novels, making the safe assumption we are unaware of the hullabaloo. Shockingly, we have been privy to the latest news on that front, and our official Twitarded stance is... (wait for it) ... We are Team Switzerland.
I was going to put up a pic of the Swiss flag, but then it looked like we were Team Red Cross, and that didn't make any damn sense. Then I was going to post a pic from The Sound of Music, but that looked like we were aiming for Team Nazi, and we don't need that kind of trouble. Google says those are the Swiss Alps and I believe them. Because the internet does not lie.
We like our quiet, drama-free little corner of the fandom (save for the *cough*panties*cough*, natch). A lot of people have a lot of strong opinions on the matter, and we'd like to stay out of the melee. The end.
This is where a television show would insert a musical interlude. I can't do that, so here is a link for instructions on how to make your own dental dam. Don't question it. Just go with it. It's a little Martha Stewart meets Macgyver meets Ron Jeremy. It's also decidedly NSFW unless you work in an adult toy store or make amateur porn in your garage for a living.
Get out your crafting scissors and let's discuss.